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Joining the “Club”

pupfoster1 Member Posts: 176

Hello all,

looks as though I’ll be joining the group as all indications are a recurrence of my BC after over 10 years of NED. I’ve been having “traveling” bone pain for several months now, and even though all the Dr’s knew of my BC history, no one until I visited my Oncologist recommended a CT. My Oncologist phoned a few days later saying it was “highly suspicious of breast cancer” and she was shocked of the difference between this scan and one I had several years ago. F me. Just had the bone biopsy today, but I already know deep inside it’s all over. Pain in multiple areas and moving. I still don’t know if any organs are involved or what if any treatments will be recommended.

I’m numb, pissed and scared. My kids live far from home and are just beginning their adult lives. I am blessed to have a great support system in my husband, family and friends however, we haven’t shared with our kids yet. Only close family. I don’t want to upset the kids until I know exactly what I’m dealing with.

Damn it this sucks. This site was super helpful through my original diagnosis so I’ll be leaning on some of you to show me the way.

Thanks for listening and being here. Best to you all.



  • lilyfrombeppu
    lilyfrombeppu Member Posts: 29
    edited April 2023

    Sending ((( virtual hugs ))) to you. My original diagnosis was BC stage 4 with metastasis to my lungs. That was 4 years ago. I've been on that roller coaster of hope & despair. For you reaching NED and then to have this happen to you must be quite overwhelming. I hope that you will find people to help you. I will be thinking of you.

  • divinemrsm
    divinemrsm Member Posts: 6,144
    edited April 2023

    pupfoster, its definitely a shock to the system when you first receive this news. It does get better as you begin treatment and find ways to cope and learn to live with the disease. I wish you all the best. Hang in there!

  • aprilgirl1
    aprilgirl1 Member Posts: 777
    edited April 2023

    pupfoster1, it is such a shock. I was dx stage 1 in 2008 and completed all the treatment including femara for 6+ years until the oncologist took me off it due to "your risk of breast cancer recurrence is lower than your risk of bone loss from femara at this point". That oncologist is retired and here I am....stage IV 11/2019.

    However, there are many treatment options and I have done well for 3.5 years on Ibrance and Fulvestrant. I am surprised at how "normal" I feel right now. At the stage IV dx, my oncologist recommended that I wait and see how I felt before I quit my job or made any big changes. I am still working (self employed realtor) and had the best $$$ years of my career since becoming stage IV. Despite covid, I have traveled a lot, attended some fantastic concerts and spent time with friends who live far away. I have a personal "bucket list" and am checking off items.

    DivineMrsM said it so well, this does get better once you have started treatment and you see that it is working. I have a very supportive family and friends, too which is so important. However, I find the best support on here with others who understand first hand what we are going through, share tips on the medications when we are starting them and cheer us on!

    Hang in htere, we are here for you!

  • arc66
    arc66 Member Posts: 8
    edited April 2023

    Hi Pupfoster,

    I was originally diagnosed in 2010 but went metastatic in 2015 (both lungs, spine, sternum and hip) On treatment every three weeks since then and I have just gone in to my ninth year. We are all unique and that’s a good thing. Once your treatment plan is in place everything will look a lot brighter.

    Best wishes.

  • AKJ
    AKJ Member Posts: 115
    edited April 2023

    pupfoster, I really understand the shock you’re experiencing. Take advantage of all the support systems your hospital offers. It really helps.