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Waiting

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I was diagnosed June 6. I finished all my imaging tests in Friday. I get a call that night, saying it looks more spread then they thought and in both breast. So I'm being scheduled for more tests.

I'm scared enough with it being stage 1a I'm not sure how to handle more. I'm 33, my mom keeps crying, brother cry's but not all the time and I don't think it's hit my sister. The added stress of them is not helping...I live with mom and sister so can't ignore them all the time

Comments

  • jons_girl
    jons_girl Member Posts: 444
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    waiting for results and getting clear information is the worst part of the cancer screening process. I’m so sorry your going through this. This forum was a huge blessing to me through my cancer journey.
    I was stage 1a diagnosis too.

  • kaynotrealname
    kaynotrealname Member Posts: 416
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    Hi Kristin. So sorry you're here but welcome. As Jons said, this is the worst time. It does get better once all the information is collected and treatment can begin. And please don't get too hung up on stage. Early breast cancer can be anything up to some stage 3 diagnoses. Treatment is a great equalizer there. As horrible as this is, breast cancer is so common that a plethora of money is thrown at it and as result new treatments are constantly coming out. So please don't despair. Wish you had less company but the good news is that with plenty of people you have plenty of support. Please don't hesitate to use this site.

  • moderators
    moderators Posts: 8,212
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    Hi, kristin89. We're so sorry you find yourself here, we know this is an overwhelming and scary time. One day, one step, one moment at a time, and we're here with you for every single one.

    The Mods

  • elainetherese
    elainetherese Member Posts: 1,628
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    Hi!

    It took awhile for my doctors to figure out my situation, and it was sort-of depressing as the news got worse. First, the lump was 3.9 cm. Then, 5 cm. Then, the 5 cm. lump had a satellite tumor, and one node lit up on a scan! I was supposedly Stage III, Grade 3, and my cancer cells were rapidly dividing, so aggressive. In the end, we'll never know how big anything was because I did 5 months of chemo before surgery and all of the active cancer in my breast and node was gone, according to pathology after surgery. I did all the recommended treatments and am still here, cancer-free, nine years after diagnosis.

    Even if your news gets worse, remember that breast cancer is very treatable. This isn't pancreatic cancer or other kinds of cancer with poor outcomes. 95% of women diagnosed with early stage breast cancer are still alive five years after diagnosis.

    Take it is easy, and, yes, it does get better once you have a plan in place.

  • salamandra
    salamandra Member Posts: 745
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    Hi kristin,

    It's not ok for your mother to make her feelings about this into your problem. It is natural and appropriate that it is stressful for her, but she needs to find coping mechanisms that don't increase your own stress. 'Comfort in, dump out'.

    (It's not ok for your brother either, but giving him a bit more benefit of the doubt since he's presumably closer to you in age and not actually your parent).

    That said, well-meaning people often have no idea how to be supportive. It's totally fine to tell her, 'It makes me feel more stressed when you cry in front me, and it helps me feel loved and supported when you stay even keel/wait for me to bring up the subject first/etc, whatever fits'. Giving people something concrete to do or to follow can really help.

    Do you have your own therapist/social worker and/or other sources of support? There are lots of resources available to breast cancer patients and some are specifically aimed at younger people like you. That could be really helpful.

    Wishing you strength and peace!

  • moderators
    moderators Posts: 8,212
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    @kristin89 Thinking of you! Have you gotten any more information on when your additional tests are scheduled? Please keep coming back here for support — we're all here for you!

    —The Mods