I need support please

mountainsandme
mountainsandme Member Posts: 15
edited February 13 in Waiting for Test Results

I am 41, married with 3 kids. I had a mammogram followed by an ultrasound yesterday. I am now scheduled for an ultrasound guided biopsy later this month. I also have a surgeon appointment in a few days. I’m terrified. The waiting, wondering. The ultrasound shows a birad 5. That seems like a likely malignant diagnosis. The mass is just under 1cm and ultrasound doesn’t show anything on lymph nodes. Anyone else have a similar scenario? I have so much to live for. This is all so overwhelming to me. Thank you.

Edited by Mods to add: This user is formerly known as bzar82

Comments

  • homemom
    homemom Member Posts: 842

    First you have to do this one thing, it was the best advice I got when I was going through what you are right now: Only deal with the facts in front of you right now. There are a lot of "what ifs" when it comes to diagnosing if you have breast cancer. Don't google anything either. Seriously… don't.

    IF you are diagnosed with BC, and this is if, you will feel a lot better when you have a plan in place. It's amazing how that puts you at ease. You could end up just having a lumpectomy, radiation and then medication.

    I didn't go to the doctor soon enough or I would have escaped my experience. I see people like you and I feel like you'll be fine. Fine in that you are getting at it early, if you even have it. If it keeps you awake at night, see if your doctor will give you some anxiety meds so you can sleep.

  • mountainsandme
    mountainsandme Member Posts: 15

    Thank you. I appreciate your advice and insight. Google is the worst and the what ifs are endless.

  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 5,289

    To add to what homemom said, please understand that you are very, very far from dying even if you do have bc. You cannot die from breast cancer confined to the breast and only a very small percentage, about 6%, are diagnosed as metastatic (bc that has spread beyond the breast) from the start. The waiting is difficult but bc is not considered an emergency in almost all cases. We know it probably seems like it to you so although waiting stinks, it will not contribute negatively to any possible bc issues.
    Deal with what you know for certain today and try to stop speculating over things that will likely not happen.

  • mountainsandme
    mountainsandme Member Posts: 15

    Thank you.

  • moderators
    moderators Posts: 8,633

    We're so sorry you find yourself here with this worry, @bzar82, we know how overwhelming this can all feel. You've gotten some wonderful responses already, but we just wanted you to know that you are not alone, and regardless of how this turns out, we're here for you.

    The Mods

  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 5,289

    bzar,

    I also wanted to say that learning to deal with this process without going to dark places is not easy so please don’t think any of us developed a zen like demeanor about bc easily, if at all! But for the sake of one’s sanity, you just train yourself to not look beyond what you know. And even that is not perfect as most of us, even long term folks like me, still have difficult times. It’s just way too stressful to go down unknown paths that you may never need to take. Take care

  • mountainsandme
    mountainsandme Member Posts: 15

    Thank you. I’m trying to just focus on what I do know. I start thinking other things and I tell myself that I need to stop!

  • needs.a.nap
    needs.a.nap Member Posts: 220

    Hello @bzar82. How are you holding up? I just read your post now and wanted to say hi. And I’m sorry for what you are going through. Most of us have been in your shoes. It’s very overwhelming to find out you might have cancer and to not know what your future looks like. Chances are very, very good you are going to be ok. Even if it turns out to be cancer. I’m learning that. Maybe you have biopsy results already?

    I got a Bi-rads 5 ultrasound report on June 1st and remember all too well the surreal state I was in, feeling healthy but was I doing to die? It didn’t even feel real! I was on this site every night, finding comfort and practical advice and humor! Being reassured that I can do this, that I actually would survive, that I would be ok. I knew absolutely nothing about breast cancer! Reading about other’s experiences here really was amazing and so helpful!

    My tumor was 1.5cm and it turned out to be cancer, thankfully early stage and my lymph nodes were clear. From the initial ultrasound report the lymph nodes looked fine and that was confirmed with the sentinel node biopsy during surgery. A one-sided mastectomy took care of my cancer, thankfully I did not need radiation or chemotherapy and now I take Tamoxifen to help prevent any recurrence. It’s definitely been a process but it’s all been very doable, so far.

    I’m wishing you all the best!! I’ll be thinking about you. Take care!

  • rnjen
    rnjen Member Posts: 17

    Not knowing what to expect is the worst part of breast cancer in my opinion. Praying your biopsy will be benign. If you do have cancer things move pretty fast or at least they did in my case. I was diagnosed and had a double mastectomy 2 weeks later at 44 years old. I am now a year out since my initial surgery. The worst part initially is waiting for pathology reports and Dr appointments. Once I had all of that information and a solid plan of action it took away some of the severe stress I had. Let us know what your biopsy shows.