Bottle o Tamoxifen

I have actually taken the house phone with me in the car instead of my cell. It really doesn;t work once I leave the driveway. I asked the sales guy at AT&T if he had anything in braille. He thought I was joking.

Thanks, Shari & Dianarose.  Shari, you are so right that it doesn't end after surgery.  So many people continue to ask me how I'm doing, and I just smile and say "hanigin' in there!" and push myself so hard to get my work done so I don't let students or colleagues down.  Have started thinking about not renewing my contract next year, but it is very scary both financially & personal identity issues. And yet, I am so wanting time to "just piddle" and not have stresses hanging over my head.

Paula, I was just thinking that some surgeons will do a hysterectomy without having much objection, with minimal disease present, but I guess removing breasts to prevent BC seems more threatening because you can see the results, whereas with other surgeries you don't.  And of course, you can get breast augmentation or breast reduction for appearnace, and to relieve back pain, but why should it be different if you want a little more tissue removed to prevent BC???  I actually asked my BS if she would consider BMX after my first diagnosis - to prevent recurrence - she said she didn't think it would be necessary, I had chemo and had NED on PET, so she just gave me false reassurance - recurrence hit me 4 months after that visit.  You have to do what you know in your heart and your own body what you think is right - just finding the health care provider to listen and help can be a challenge.

Linda I know what you mean.  My younger sissy had 1st go round with BC when she was in her early 30's.  Her doctor wouldn't take her other breast.  He said there was no way he would do it.  Well she went thru with surgery, chemo, and 2 years later, cancer in the other breast.  I was just so heartbroken for her to have to go thru chemo all over again.  Plus her MO scared the crap outa her, (I still to this day am furious about it).  I know I read several articles that say woman here in the midwest are more likely to have their breasts removed unlike the women on each side of the coasts.  I started to doubt them after reading story after story about woman who weren't really given the whole picture.  I understand that there are woman who live long times with just one breast, heck my granny was one of them, along with my auntie.  But it just seems as if it has gotten more aggresive as time goes on.  I also know that its a harsh reminder daily of what once was, but in the grand sceme of it, I have much more peace of mind knowing that I don't have to live with ticking time bombs on my chest. 

Tink - I will certainly be with you on Thursday.  It does not matter if it is bc related or not.  Just be sure to have lots of pockets and if it does get too crowded, I will hop on your shoulder.  I hope you get some answers and relief real soon.

Paula/Lynda - I sooo agree with you ladies. And I consider myself very lucky to have a wonderfully supportive BS who never once questioned my choice to go BMX. I had cancer on one side and an area of concern on the other. No way did I want to do this twice if I could avoid it. It is bad enough to have to make such decisions but to have to fight to find a medical provider to listen & support your decision is ridiculous.  And like Tink, I have never regretted my decision.

Edited to include that I would consider it an honor to attend the pocket party Tink. I'll even bring snacks...

Dx: 6/27/2011, IDC, <1cm, Stage I, Grade 2, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-

I'll be in your pocket Tink!

((((Tink))) Count me in.

Tink, I will be there for you tomorrow!

Sherry, glad your appt went well.  Nice to have one that is not horrible or super-stressful once in a while!

I talked to HR today - will renew my FMLA and I will actually TAKE some time off this time! (It was originally a floating arrangement, so I could take time off if/when I needed, but I don't do so well with that - I just keep plugging on).  Will try to hang on for 9 more weeks until semester is done, then can keep my position for me in case the summer gives me enough time to recuperate.  If not, I can still use FMLA and then long-term disability would kick in after 3 months.  This is a big load off my mind financially, but not professionally.  I guess I need to work on a new identity that does not involve my professional life.

It's a beautiful day here, we are on spring break, and I need to get back to grading papers since I have these days to catch up! Hugs everyone!

Just got news on my sick pool days.  When I went to work here three years ago I decided to participate in the sick pool.  So glad I did, I can only request time once every 12 months.  So far I have been able to keep up with every thing with my sick and vacation times.  Anyway I requested 45 days which I thought would get me through everything this year because I will still be accruing sick and vacation time along the way.  Anyway they decided to give me an additional 5 days.  So now I have 400 hours that I can use.  What a relief to not worry about that. 

Sherry that is fantastic news! 

Tink honey I hope you are feeling better.

I have had my own dilemma this last week.  I still have my ulcers and called my gastro who prescribed me a pill to take 4 times a day to coat my stomach.  Well I was only taking 2 pills, morning and night and after the whole time I was on it (5days) I felt like I was getting a cold and it hurt my throat to swallow.  Long story short I stopped the pills yesterday morning as nigh-time was the worst.  My throat was closing up and I couldn't breath.  I looked in my throat and my tongue is huge on the right side.  So I call my gastro and he tells me he has never heard of any such reaction to the medication and that I need to be seen immediately.  I couldn't arrange an appointment with my primary and I have an appointment with my MO on Monday.  I think I am just gonna sit this thing out.  Night-time worries me the most as it is kinda scary not being able to breath, but I am so TIRED of Doctors and how they never hear of any such thing.  The freaking SE listed are under severe throat and tongue reaction but yet you never heard of any such thing and pass me on to the next Doc to figure out what you should be able to do......SO needless to say I am quite bitchy but gonna wait it out. ARGH!!!!!

Let hope Thursday turns out better......love ya ladies

June - So sorry to hear you are having the stomach issues and think you have every right to be bitchy!  Why is it that doctors deny SE's even on the most obvious ones? Take care of yourself hon! 

Lynda & Sherry - Glad you ladies got the time off worked out so you can just focus on taking care of yourselves for awhile.

heartnsoul76 - I totally agree with you as I am not crazy about the Tamoxifen & side effects either but it sure as hell beats the alternative. You verbalized my deepest fears exactly in the one sentence.

Tink - Will be with you for the ENT visit tomorrow and will try to keep the giggles to a minimum....

Happy Thursday to all my other Tammy friends! 

Ok so last nights sleep was a tad better but I am taking Benedryl even though I know I am not supposed to .  I need some of this swelling to go down as when morning comes I want to be there for my kids.  Pretty sad that I am actually worried about that and if someone just looked at me they would have put me on a steroid and call it a day......anyway a little less bitchy and ready for some fun today soooooooor ready Tink for that pocket party and I will try to refrain from giggling.....Where are  the pic's of  the eye candy Paula? 

Junie, here is the eyecandy for our Tink!!  But something makes me wonder if you need it just as much as she does.  All that med junk, yucky, hugs for ya girlie!

Paula - OMG!  You find the best eye candy.   

June - We don't have to tell Tink.  I can will share with you. 

Jo I love you and you always manage to crack me up.....

Tink it sounds like another pocket party for tomorrow too......yipee and along with all those parties comes the eye candy.

Gorgeous day here in Mass and I couldn't be happier