Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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Just have to say this....bonnets, they do that because sub-consciously you'll be thinking you must might look that great if you use their product. Never works with me though....I didn't look as good as most of those women when I was 30. I had enough to do when I was 30 that I seldom even thought about how I looked and wrinkles was the last thing on my mind. My face isn't too bad ( as I furiously knock on wood ) but I do think the Arimidex/Anastrozole gave me the hands of a 95 yr. old. In fact, my hands and arms seemed to be showing a great good deal of aging. As I'm normally covered pretty much every where else.....if that continues I hope it is moving downward rather than the other direction.
Sigh !!!!
At least though, ( another big knock on wood here ) I do seem to have gotten to NED using the protocol I was given which did include the 5 yrs. of Arimidex. I can hardly get too bent out of shape. Actually I am truly, truly grateful. I have not feared death for quite a long while, but realistically I'd like to stick around for some time to come. I'm sure there is someone in this world that needs a thorn in their side on occasion. I could do that if need be.
Again...blessings
Jackie
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Thought I was done. I'm so thrilled for you Carole. it is hard to lose weight and if you just read my entry....I've purchased what might be a huge downfall for my diet. I'm not gaining, but not losing either, which is mainly due to irregular meal times and not sticking with very lean dessert items when I have them. Well, I'll just keep my fingers crossed that I can keep not gaining if nothing else.
I am so, so sorry to hear about your niece. I was beginning to hope that maybe things would work out. We are really not in charge of anyone's outcomes....oftentimes, not even our own so while it is not a huge surprise, I am disappointed for you and your family. I'm sure everyone had some hopes going.
Congratulations of your lab numbers too. I'm sure it is the healthy food along with getting enough exercise, and losing un-needed weight. It all plays a part......sometimes it is not too much fun --- digging into a scrumptious pie is much more fun.
I know some people ( sisters actually ) that buy one dessert and share it among the three. They eat slowly and really enjoy it. I've also heard that if you chew and enjoy slowly -- you won't NEED the giant sized piece you could allow yourself when you were younger. I'll have to keep this heavily in mind for after supper tonight.
Blessings
Jackie
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Jackie, we must have posted at the same time. That pie sounds divine! Enjoy!
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Thanks IllinoisLady and RitaJean for your kind words and reassurance to my "guilt".
Am feeling more confident this evening as I get closer to the surgery day (Wednesday). Spoke to nurses at the hospital as well as the PSs office. Bought a neat gadget, a remote to turn my bedside lamp on/off. It's the little things.
I'm ready for the next step!
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Global -- hooray. That is why we have hung around so long after our journeys. For reasons we don't understand, ( maybe just because this was the disease that almost automatically insured, even if we had never done it before, that we would get on a blog ) you never quite walk away and go back to your before I had cancer normal days. We talk about the new normal which can be anything. Often for us who are a ways out....it is the slightly nervous, timid apprehension as we wait for the ALL CLEAR sign after mammograms. For others it is something else....maybe tumor marker numbers -- but it is a new way of seeing life and of dealing with the aftermath of this disease. It is the one that never really goes away --- though for so many of us, it does get us to NED.
It takes as long as it takes ( different for all ) to get through the maize that never quite ends that is a cancer diagnosis. My travels through Chemo were sometimes a bit on the harsh side, but having to do it didn't make me envy those who didn't have to.....it just made me wish all the more that I hadn't been one of the "chosen" for the disease at all. So we will all be hanging around on Wednesday ( in your pocket ) watching out for you. Count on it.
Blessings
Jackie
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Carole, your niece must be in a very dark place. My thoughts are with your whole family. How is your sister holding up? Are the children with her?
Jackie, I was just commenting about my arms today ... that they seem more droopy than before Arimidex. I will keep taking the drug though and, like you, am grateful that I have it. When I am cleared to start lifting some weights, maybe the droopies will become a little tighter. I was over weight when Dx so I am not complaining, just commenting.
Carole, I hear WW has a new program as of January. Do you like it? I liked the program that I lost on in the early 2000's. Unfortunately, I have not maintained.
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global, your remote light switch sounds interesting ... glad that you are feeling more confident about your surgery. Keep us posted because we care.
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Carole - congrats on the weight loss & on the labs. Sorry to hear that your niece has re-lapsed. We'll keep her & her kiddos in our thoughts.
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Carole..... Yes..... I'm so sorry.... There are just so very few people that can stay clean.... even after rehab, and sober living. It's just an endless battle. You almost have to just give it up for them, but try and make the lives of the kids normal.... Are the kids with her? Can someone else in the family give them the caring and love they need, until Mom can handle them?
I forget if you already said that.... Can the courts help the family do this? It's just amazing to me, how the "troubled" can get the money to support their habits.... And it's an on-again, off-again battle. Like my Brother's Son, they spend what little they get, then have to move in with one of their X's until they get more money....
I watched all of this un-fold.... for about 3 years, with our neighbor..... I think I told you.... She was raising her Grand-daughter, because her Daughter was always in trouble with the law.... using and selling.... And the little one's Dad was in Prison.
And she, herself.... the GRANDmother was using as well.... Her Son, was found...."accidental overdose..." So she was losing everything herself....
It's just too painful to bring back those memories, but what you are afraid of happening, DID happen with her... So the little one had "lost" another one.... An Aunt, did come to get her.... but I never found out what happened to her, or her little Brother.
I tried... but I never knew anyones last name, or any details.... The only ones that matter are the kids....
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Sally, I became a ww lifetimer back in the 90's, I believe. It was way back when the ww plan was all about exchanges. Very complicated but I mastered it. Then came points and points plus. The company is always fiddling with the program. It's part of the marketing, I suppose. Now there's an alternative to the points plus where you eat foods from a large approved list of healthy choices and don't have to track points. But I like the points system where you eat whatever you want as long a you stay within your allotted points. All veggies and fruits are free foods with 0 points. That encourages you to snack on fruits and veggies.
My niece's legal husband (she can never afford a lawyer to divorce him) has been living in my niece's trailer home since the last time she went off to a rehab institution. When she came back about a month ago, she just moved back in with him and the kids. No intimate relationship between the adults. My sister has "had it" with her daughter. Now the father of the two older kids will have to accept responsibility for them. He may move the three of them to MS where some of his family live. The 4 yr. old girl will have to go to her father.
I don't know what we will do with the double-wide trailer, which is very nice. As large as my house. My niece's family, including me, chipped in to buy it and set it up on a piece of property that belongs to another sister. Our purpose was to provide a decent place for the children to live where they would each have a bedroom and not be ashamed of their home.
You hear stories of children from bad backgrounds rising above their circumstances and becoming a big success. These three children have a lot to overcome. In both cases, the fathers are no prizes. The truth of the matter is that people who shouldn't have kids do have kids.
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Compassion, in which all ethics must take root, can only attain its full breadth and depth if it embraces all living creatures and does not limit itself to humankind.
Albert Schweitzer
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Carole, you are so right. Why are the ones who shouldn't have kids blessed with them? Both of my daughters have infertility issues and would give anything for a child. Not fair!
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Cami, we have a friend who is a minister, he posted that he looks like an 1800's preacher who is telling God how rough the trip west has been
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Hi Sandra, how are you doing today? Hope you are healing and looking forward to doing "normal" things...
Cami - love the "holy water"...can we sell that?
My favorite lotion is Victoria Secret Vanilla Lace...it is thick and creamy but not greasy and gives immediate relief to dry skin. I don't think it has lasting properties though because I have to use it a lot.Carole, what great news for you. Whew! I did not know fruit is "free" on WW. That could be a trap for me...I would over eat fruit for sure. I was sick in January with head, sinus, aches, and kept adding meds. I just decided one day to get off unnecessary meds, stop using the Afrin spray, and to eat right - reducing dairy, wheat, sugar and bad fats drastically while replacing with good stuff. I lost over 15 pounds and am eating pretty well. My carbs cravings cannot be fed.
About your niece, I am so sorry to hear. The situation with the children is especially sad. It's unfortunate that she has not been able to overcome the monster. Regarding the fathers, there is a line from the old movie Parenthood (Steve Martin) -- something like "you gotta have a license to drive a car, but any #@&! can be a father." Sending thoughts and prayers to you and the family. You surely have given time and kindness to your niece and children. I don't know what more you can do.
Jean, yes, winter is here again. My faux fur trimmed quilted coat is the coat of choice for 2 days now. I work with a meteorologist and he is sticking by the low end forecast. Hope so...
Jackie, it is true that we age along with the SEs from our drugs and treatments. I often wonder "who would I be" right now if it weren't for BC? My face is changing before my eyes. Some day I like me and others I can't look
. The universal response is when we look back on these days we'll say "we weren't so bad"....and "we looked pretty darned good!"0 -
Congrats Carole on the weight loss and the good labs! YEA!! I am also sorry to hear about your niece. Everyone has tried so hard to help her but really only she can do that...and unfortunately some want to help themselves and just can't. I will keep your family in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs!
Jackie, I bought everything I needed for the beans when I was at the grocery store today. I probably won't fix them until Thursday or Saturday night and I'll be sure to let you know how we liked them. They sure sound interesting!
Hi cami....gee I've missed you lately! Glad you're back!
I have been attempting to clean out the apartment that is above our garage. It was my office when I had my business and is where I stored all the teaching materials that I brought home when I retired from teaching 11 years ago. I have used some of them when I did workshops for our local science museum and did some curriculum development for neighboring schools but most of them have just been sitting up there collecting dust. Between the two things, it seemed a monumental task so I decided I'd spend an hour at a time up there...at least 3 or 4 times a week. I have been making a dent and don't dread it too much. One of thse days I'll be so glad to get it done. I need to have somebody show me how to take pictures and then post them on Craig's list as I have several things that might sell well on that site. So..I'm off to tackle at least another hour.
Hugs to all of you!
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hi Carole
So sorry to hear about your niece. My youngest daughter is adopted. Her birth mother was and still is a severe alcoholic. We first got Jamie as a foster child when she was 13 mos old. We had her for 4mos, then she went back to her bio mom. She came home to us 7 mos later at 23 mos, and never left again. The damage done to her in the 20 mos she spent with her bio mom is irreparable. She had an extremely traumatic teenhood, despite our constant love and support. I cannot tell you how many counselors I have taken her to. She scammed them all and never really got to the heart of her issues, which were abandonment, neglect and abuse. She has been diagnosed by my psychiatrist, who is a very well respected man, with Borderline Personality Disorder. I have said all that to encourage you and you family to provide as much stability and love possible to the kids involved. My daughter can be very difficult to deal with ( none of her 4 sibs understand that her irrational behavior is a result of her condition, and she has little control of it), but with all the ups and downs, thanks to her being in our reasonably sane home, she is the married mother of 2 beautiful children. My psych says , having known her during those awful teen years, that without us, she would probably be a hooker, with five kids from 5 different fathers. Do I think she is all better? No way- nor do I approve of a lot of her parenting practices- but both children are at school on time ( within a few minutes), every day, and she makes a concentrated effort to do fun things with them, like family movie nights. I guess what I am trying to say, Carole, is that you may think you cannot change things, but with Gods help, you can have a postive effect on the children. If you or your sister are not close enough to be in their lives on a regular basis, send cards, letters, text messages- whatever you can - to let them know that they are loved unconditionally, and have people who care about them, regardless of any situation they may be living in. Hope this doesn't come off as preachy- I just have a long history with kids, in many different capacities and know that having someone "on their side" can make an incredible difference to their future.
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Hi Everyone--
Annab are u new or I just forgot--well if u'r new welcome, if u'r not I will still welcome u cuz u'r new to me.
Carole Great news for u'r WW and u tests. U always seem so disciplined and that shows u are. But of course where u'r niece is concerned I feel very sorry for u'r family--I am glad u'r sister has u tho--u seem like her rock and she needs that.
Jackie we got more snow this morning--unless the rain has turned white. Nothing is budding around here yet nor wanting to bud. So we'll see when Spring comes. We'll probably go right to summer--then u'll hear me complaining ALOT..
Well I have some kind of flu cuz it's coming out of both ends, so it's not my usual D--Oy Vey--- I can't diagnose myself anymore, I'm loosing my medical touch.
OK I just wanted to pop in and say hello--so Hello and wishing u all good things.And better skin.
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Hello All - I planned to individually address this, but memory doesn't have enough room for all of us on WW. But Carole, good for you on a loss. I'm also a lifetime member, but gained, so now am counting points and joined on-line. I like the method and have had about a 5 lb loss since rads finished - a month ago.
Family members with addictions are so sad. Alcohol has been the demon for many people in my family. Some recovered, but others did not. I wish I had suggestions that would be helpful. Just know I hope things get better for the niece who is having a tough go.
This is a big week for me. One month follow-up apt for rads, birthday coming up Monday and directory photos at church. I ordered two 5x7s (one for each kid) to let them remember how happy and relatively good I looked for someone 67 and just finished treatment for bc. If I age faster due to Arimidex they will have something to look at from this week.
I bought what I think are the ingredients for the green beans. Now to look again above to be sure what I'm doing. If anyone remembers pass along a hint. Thaks
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Oops. I bought fresh green beans. I better get cooking them. But should be just as good, not just as fast.
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Jackie - the green beans were delicious - I ate a whole pile of them. I didn't recall you used sugar free marmalade, but I only needed a little for my single portion of beans. So I think the WW point would be 1 for the marmalade/lemon juice and 0 for the beans. A great food value. Thanks
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Sounds like I wasn't off my rocker then with the beans. I use Smuckers No sugar orange marmalade. It is actually sweetened with Splenda -- so is not sugar-free other than free of sugar calories. I don't use a whole lot of any kind of sugar anymore -- not even the Splenda for the most part. I used Splenda for such a long time now that table sugar in some things taste horrid to me.
Anyway.....Dh and I split the can of beans I generally make this way. We like to "try" things as long as they aren't too way out there. I'd have to hunt them up now ( I haven't done some of this stuff for a long time ) but I have a recipe for Baked Beans that uses Dr. Pepper. Oh....it makes it such a zippy flavor. Also have done a cake with pinto beans. Sounds a bit horrific, but tasted similar to a spice cake. And the icing on it was Cream Cheese. I also make a Butterfinger Cake -- using my own little touches rather than theirs. Most of the time it comes home empty but I haven't done one of those in a long, long time.
Also do Lemon-Pineapple Pie.....which is simply Lemon Pie Filling with crushed pineapple drained and added. My mom made this for us from the time we were little kids and it is one of my favorites to this day. I'm the easy cook. If it is simple ( well most of the stuff I do ) and doesn't take a boat load of ingredients....I'm probably going for it.
Blessings
Jackie
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Thanks AGAIN for your welcome and kindness. Am all marked up for surgery tomorrow. Feeling more relaxed after the pre-op visit with the PS today. Will head to bed now and feeling blessed to be in this group of remarkable new friends. Must be at the hospital at 5:15 AM. Op scheduled to begin at 7:15,
The next step begins....
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((((((global)))))))))) and we will be cheering you on an in your pocket.
Blessings
Jackie
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Anneb, I appreciate your taking the time to write your post sharing your experiences with a mentally troubled adopted child. My niece was also diagnosed with borderline personality disorder when she was a young teen. She's like a person with multiple personalities and you never quite know which person is going to take over.
Today was day 1 of a 3-day golf tournament. It's a ringer format where you can improve your score the 2nd and 3rd day. It would have been a pretty day except for the wind. I felt battered by the time I'd finished.
Cami, I hope you recover quickly from the flu that is making you miserable.
Globalgal, I'll be thinking about you tomorrow.
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Jackie, MIL had a recipe for apple pie made with saltine crackers. She gave me the recipe but said she didn't know why anyone would want to make it unless apples were impossible to find. I took her word and never actually tried to make it.
There's a specific treatment for Borderline Personality Disorder called DBT (Dialectical Behavior Training) which was invented by a doctor at the University of Washington. It's long term and difficult but does get results. They're discovering other uses for it as well.
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Wren I never heard of the salteen crackers, just the ritz crackers--altho I never made it
Global I'm so glad this part will be over for u, ad u have to let us know as soon as u can how u feel, cuz someone might come up with a helpful hint to make u more comfortable.
BTW Wren I have never heard of any treatment for BPD--it's so good to hear.
BTW too I'm up at this time cuz I'm sick as a dog, wel a sick dog.
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He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the universe.
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Marcus Aurelius0 -
Might I say un -characteristically Cam -- oh damn. I sure wish you were feeling better and you come anyway to cheer us on in our day. You and the sunshine out my window are a perfect pair today. I hope you get to feeling better really soon.
Wren, I think ( since I don't real much in novels, but tons in cook-books ) that I have heard of a cracker pie. Maybe it has a taste very similar to apples taste and someone who could not get apples for a while chose to at least be able to have the flavor. It still isn't much of an excuse if you can get apples. There is though as well a ?coconut pie ?? and I did it a time or two just because. I'm all for easy and I think it was, but I don't want to get too easy.
It is going to warm a bit today and we have sun so things are ok with me. The sun always makes such a big difference. I tolerate a lot weather-wise if I can have some sun with it.
Sure liking my hair-do. I finally went and had my hair done.....cut and perm. I was several months over-due. Just did not get around to it. Well, maybe I won't wait so long next time......as I just feel so good. Of course, my hair is fine and thin so without a perm there is no body.....I'm just a total flat. It had been long enough that I had all but forgotten that a perm can look decent even when you have been out in the wind or dampness. Also, it tends to hide what gray hair I have among the curls. Believe you me, I count myself fortunate to have genes that have allowed me to not need to color my hair at going on 69. The lady I took care of before this last one was early 80's and had little gray hair......so it does happen to be slow for some I guess. Got my fingers crossed on that one.
Hope you are all having some sun today.
Blessings
Jackie
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Global ... thinking of you and hoping you are kept comfortable when you wake up after surgery.
Cami, hope you are feeling better.
Carole, the tournament sounds interesting. I don't play golf but watch it. The ringer concept is new to me but sounds like fun. Hopefully, the wind has died down. Let us know how you did today.
Hi Wrenn.
Jackie ... happy that your new hair do is making you happy ... I, too, enjoy having my hair styled ... makes me feel "refreshed and new"
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Jackie, I'm 73 and just now getting gray sideburns and a streak in my bangs. It's all actually salt and pepper but reads as pepper still. The rest of my family is prematurely gray. DS is 50 and almost completely gray, DD has colored hers for so long she has no idea. SIL lives in S. Calif. and colors hers. Her DD is considering growing it out to all gray. She has always colored her hair and had interesting hair styles, so I'm sure whatever she decides will look good.
The "apple" pie may have used Ritz crackers instead of saltines. Would make more sense. I'm sure it's a recipe from the depression or WWII.
Cami, Hope you will feel better soon. Sick dogs are pretty miserable.
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