Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Morning gals! Yes Puffin! You sound good alREADY! I like
your attitude! I had a Lumpectomy also, almost 5 years ago... Just radiation
and no chemo... In other words, I kicked it to the curb!

Just rest all the time.... Radiation knocks the soup out of
you.... I WAS going to say something else, but since you are NEW, I will refrain
from sounding obnoxious...er.

Yes, we talk about EVERYthing..... as you can tell.... even
when you can't say things, or have worries with family, us girls are always
around.

Jackie, you talked about night-driving! I just don't DO it
anymore... We had our windows tinted quite a few years ago, and MAN, it is not
safe, driving with "sun-glasses" on all the windows at night...Ha! Sure helps
with the Sun, coming in, but might as well cover all the windows with blankets
while driving at night!

Joan.... so glad we can make you smile/laugh! I love to do
that! I don't think Cammi really took it seriously, at that age.... GOOD
thing those 2 girls had each other to laugh about it. When WE, (my girlfriend
and I) had that terrible run-in with that MONSTER we were so afraid, but once we
"escaped" we laughed about it then.... Ha!

Maybe quite a few of us, have gone through "things" that
really DID hurt us at the time, but we were afraid to tell... at least I
was... SOMEtimes people threaten little girls, and then they can't even tell
their Mom's....

So they grow up, hiding things, and pretending they didn't
happen...

Oh WTH? I'm so glad I grew up, and became as astoundingly
intelligent as I am now...

shut up Cammi........... He had KIDS? That RB! What are
these men THINKING?

Good for you Teacher! Happy for you!

Okay yes Sally.... Me and Cammi are going on the road.... We
will be Thelma and Louise, only with a happier ending! Ha, ha! I mean we will
just keep driving for for-EVER!

We have to put Jackie in the back-seat, to pound sense in us
every once in awhile! She will be the Warden....

Sally, that is exactly what is happening! Theresa is moving
in 2 doors away from Eddie. She is getting kind of excited...but I know it
hurts her to leave her home.... They have the money...

It's just that life gets so HARD as we get older.... But I
know we are lucky, to BE getting older. This IS Assisted Living also.... I
called her yesterday, and I'll walk up this morning. They are taking it slow I
think.... because she could move in anytime...

She was going to Walmart with her DIL, to buy sheets and
things for her "new bed!"

Anne, you are soooooooooo lucky to have your little
Grand-kids! I remember those ages so well, and our days were just spent having
FUN, and going out to eat, and picnics, and playing those games!

We had a Pong game! And we played Pac-man all the
time!

Okay gals.... just wondering where that Camster is? Probably
out doing SOMEthing, and looking up trouble!  

THIS morning.  Too funny -- being the Warden.  They exercise control.....and somehow I think....how in the world could you control two completely live wires.  It could be fun to try though.

Hmmm, encounters!!!!!!  I did have one of the standard ones I guess.  Had gone to town to buy a record and was walking home.  Still in town and I looked up and smiled......recognized a friend's car....of so I thought.  Turned out it was a car exactly like my friend's car.  Well, a good looking guy was driving and he kept following me......which did not make me happy at all.  I know he hoped that I would get in the car so he could give me a ide the rest of the way home.  I kept having to say no thanks....because heavens.....everyone was taught to be polite about invitations. 

Skip to the final chapter.....after several turn downs......he speeded up and I was just sure he had grown tired of hearing no.  Not quite.  There was an old abandoned road ( everyone knew it was ) up ahead a little way.  I realized he had turned into the road and I studiously avoided glancing that way.....was intending to rush on by.  Well, he called out.....and being polite -- I looked that way.  Lets just say he was enjoying himself ---  and I'm sure he was delighted that I did him the great favor of ( even though quite scant ) participating somewhat in the behavior by looking at what a good job he was doing. 

Of course, I freaked.  I mean many girls my age were doing un-mentionables with guys by that time but I had not gotten there yet........so it was disgusting ( lack of sensible control and behavior ) to me,  that this person would do that at all, and that he would elicit my involvement ( however un-meant or appreciated by me )  was maniacal of him.  Why, doesn't everyone know when you are about to relive yourself of your passion without having a willing participant/partner.....they should at least not be a total stranger. 

Did it mar me for life?  I don't know, but I do know that I didn't tell anyone.  For one thing, I sort of felt that it was partly my fault since I shouldn't have smiled and looked eager at a CAR unless I was sure I knew who was actually in the car.  Guess since out of all the people I knew that had cars, no one had the same exact one.....I just ASSUMED it was my friend.  So I did feel ( even that young ) a fairly developed sense of responsibility.   Of course, it helped to not say anything, that "nothing" really happened directly to my physical person....just my sensibilities. 

Maybe I did learn then......that people are not always in good control of themselves and likely I was much more cautious afterward.  I think though for a long time I scanned faces.....hoping never to SEE this total creep again.  I don't think I ever did either.  But it took a few months for my comfort and security level to come back. 

So that's my story and I have to stick to it, cause it's mine.  Not pleasant, but not really extraordinary either.  Young people are rather flexible and I think tend to make incidents like this one just another pat of growing up -- as long as their is no physical harm.  It isn't anything I'd recommend as a rite of passage -- just I think back then.....I hadn't lived all that long and knew somehow in the scheme of things.......I'd be past this and would not need to consider it very much again.

Overcast this morning.  Very humid, yucky humid.  We may get some rain later.  I will work tonight for awhile.  So, today will be a good day, no matter what.  Of course, all my days are pretty good.  You know I always think....when I wake up and discover I'm breathing, wow, this could be the start of something good.  See you all later.

Blessings

Jackie

Ah geez Jackie!  NOT YOU!  Not our little Jackie!  But I believe it....  You were sooooooooo nice, and oblivious....  as we ALL would have been....  Eeeeeks!  

We WERE so innocent when we were young!  I mean I never even drank until I was almost 30!  And then it was for lunch with my gal-friend that I worked with!   I only went out with maybe 3 guys, before I met DH.... and we went steady, then engaged, for almost 2 years....  But when you are not even 18, you just didn't go to parties.... there weren't any! And we didn't drink.... so drive-in's were about the only thing there was!  Movies and drive-in restaurants....   

And we could pull in the parking space, order food, and then make out.... In the Winter we would steam all the windows up!  Ha, ha!    But that's what all the kids did.....

A guy exposed himself to my DD and her younger friend. We called the police. The female officer was so funny when they went to view the lineup - said unfortunately they couldn't use the proper part for identification. When I had a VW bus, a man drove along side and pleasured himself. I was so pissed because I needed to change lanes to make my turn off. I was long married and not impressed with the sight.

Oh SANDRA!  You are sounding just like HER!  Ha, ha!  I'm getting my new Dell with 50,00 gigs of ram, and 427 RPM's of speed whipped into shape!   It is so fun to DO something, and then it finally works!  I finally, with a little phone help, got all my iTunes Library downloaded, AND it plays!  

Same with my Picassa album with way more pictures than I need, but oh well, I'll get to that one of these days.....

My little neighbor is just not getting any better!  Her dizziness is getting worse....  Steve called yesterday afternoon, and asked if I would check on "Mom" because she must have had something wrong with her phone....  So I went up the alley, ever so stealthily, because you KNOW how agile I am in that alley.... And I called through her door, went in, and then I heard her from her bed.....  Her phone was not hung up, she felt terrible, and she looked a mess!

So I sat down with her.... called Steve, and he talked to her, and said they would be by in about an hour...  She is just plain dizzy now, when she is not laying down!  Her BP was just 172 over 80, so not too bad, but she just can't shake this dizziness!  

They had taken her to Walmart the day before to buy new stuff, for her room, like bedding, etc.... and plastic tubs to take her stuff... 

She said she could move in anytime, because they are delivering her bed today!  But she said she IS NOT READY TO MOVE YET!!! So that's that.  Well see what Steve says to THAT one!  Those little Italian women, are just FIESTY!!!!!!!!   Have know about 10 of them on DH's side!    I wish her fiestiness would help her out with her dizziness!   DH finally came up, told her she should drink whiskey.... Ha!  My Grandma did... every night before bed.... she took a shot of Grampa's whiskey, and slept all night!

I'll go up this morning....  but I just KNOW she won't be "better"..... It's been 2 weeks today, and they canNOT say WHY she is dizzy, most of the time!  Some days are better, but like yesterday, she was a mess!  Her Granddaughter called when I was there, and was going to run by also....  She HAS help, but now she has to make the toughest choice of her life....   and I can't help her do that....  I couldn't make MY Mom move....so I can only imagine how they all must feel....

Okay.... today is another day.....  Have a good one my friends! xoxoxoxo

Good morning everyone.  Chevy -- it is fun isn't it !!!! Everyone gets ( especially those of us who came to computing late in life ) a charge out of "discovering" what we really can do.  I know it helps that you have been using ( the old one ) a computer for years.........but some of the newer things -- in addition to your now lightning speed can feel tricky and iffy at first. I had to re-learn the mail program and some other items from when I got my permanent version of Outlook Express installed through Microsoft.  They stopped upgrading and it just nearly wrecked my system. I could have gone to Windows 7 ( which I was using anyway ) and had that only.....but I've had Outlook since I started on my first computer and it is by now an old and trusted friend. 

I feel for your little friend down the alley.  It must be difficult ( while she is in the throes of medical issues herself ) to try and consider her move to the assisted living.  I mean I'm sure part of her is thrilled....but at least right now.....whatever her problems and issues......she is in a very familiar place and has people who will come to her -- get her over some rough spots.  I do think as we age some parts can just give out to some degree..........maybe her inner ear is like that.  One little tiny section not able to function anymore.  Well, just an idea....I just wish it wasn't happening, but then if it wasn't she might not be ready to even consider the assisted living.....who knows.  Really glad she has you to talk too, but YES-YES-YES, walk down the alley carefully --- always. 

Sally -- we were always live wires I think, but when Cammie and Chevy get going....well all HECK can break loose.  It only goes to show how well-seasoned ladies can stay younger than ever. 

Am watching a Cardinal, dip down in the bed of Dh's truck ( I leave some cat-kibble in a bowl there ) and eat some of the kibble.  Never investigated  if it would damage the bird in any way.  I'm hoping not as I wouldn't be able to easily change things at this late date.

Very hot and humid out again today, but some possible showers expected.  I think we will get a slight but nice cooling trend then....and some comfortable days.  Sounds good to me. 

Worked last night and enjoyed myself. I like what I do so I never "dread" going to work.  Just hope my ladies stay well for a long time.

See you all later.

Blessings,

Jackie

pjc -- I was younger when I did my chemo ( 6 mos. total  ) and while I did have some problems.....they were not of the variety that would have caused me to stop having it.  Difficult choices need to be made for those who are Triple Negative since they start out with less options in general than other people. 

It does I think tend to be a crap-shoot.  I've listened to ladies who just nearly sailed through their chemo and what issues did turn up were easily addressed as they were mainly general comfort  more so than serious side effects of deep disturbance. 

I would  talk to as many people as you can, including with your Dr. and maybe some on his staff, gather whatever opinions you can -- perhaps make a list of possible questions from that and just keep at it until you reach a point where the feeling you have coming from inside is making you comfortable. 

Despite any information we might come by -- if you are religious or spiritual, the bottom line could be that no matter what disease or what treatment, we all have so much time --- and if we are meant to be here, we will be.  Just saying that I trusted what I felt inside --- happily for me it coincided with what I was told would give me the best chance to get to NED and stay that way for a long, long time.  Not without issues --- but I live fully and happily every day.  I would not have changed a thing about the way I did things. 

Many hopes that you will soon 'discover' exactly what is right for you. 

Blessings

Jackie

miminiemi - I read that book, too.

Today has been a down day. Seems the cording issue has come back. I went to church with my hair pulled back because it was impossible to hold the dryer to get my hair completely dry. Thought I was past this, but it reared it's ugly head. Makes me want one of those hammers like in the kids' arcade to pound that head back down.

Blondie I wish u get get u'r lung taken care of so u'd feel better.  And for me and Chevy I am always trying to better myself but some people just hold u back (no names mentioned, ahem) OK let's face facts I YAM WHAT I YAM--

Welcome Puffin and pfc?? I think I got those initials wrong but u know who u are. Yes this is a great thread and again we do talk about everything so I hope u stay and join us. Making a choice for chemo I could never do that, I'm sure--I had no choice and everyone does take this differently, so keep an open mind and a gut feeling. And Puffin I don't know how u work 12 hr shifts to begin with, and I don't know how u can do it now. They've always said the medical team are u'r worst patients, but don't feel bad just go with it like it's a compliment.

Carole I knew u'd find a nice place to settle and u 2 always make friends so easily cuz u'r so nice.

OK are we done talking about men and their things, why do they even think anyone would enjoy that blah--that's a I'm gagging sound.

OK I forgot everything I read but u all know I'm saying hello to all of u.

Wrenn, was sorry to read about your neuropathy even after stopping chemo.  Are you enjoying your car?

Mimi, I know what you mean about "must dos."  Two a day sounds like a fair number. 

Teacher, I don't know anything about cording.  I hope you feel better soon.

Hi Blondie.

Welcome Puffin .. or did I say welcome already ... in any case, HI!

Carole, wow, you sure have traveled.  The Minnesota area where you are sounds like a great summer spot.  You said your husband was a boat captain.  Where ... what kind of ship?

Pjc71,  I just sent you a PM re my positive experience with chemo.  I am also triple negative and a "very lively" (as you described yourself!) 67!  I'm itching to stay around as long as I can too - to be there for my husband, kids and 7 grandchildren.  I feel badly for those who have had negative experiences with chemo, but that it not the case for everyone.   Just check it out thoroughly for yourself and be comfortable with your decision - whatever that may be.  Best of everything to you.  This is the toughest time. 

Paula

Edwards, no one wishes to be critical, but I hadn't noticed you posting with us before.  Our two friends here, Cammie and Chevy, just sort of have a thing going.  They did not mean anything but due to the fact that we all post and read here almost daily.....we are use to how they talk.  No one would wish to offend anyone here or elsewhere.  It just tends to help if you have been here and followed along from the origination point.

You are quite correct.....there are despicable people every where, in all sort of places --- and  I really do feel at some point -- they will be dealt with in whatever way is applicable.  I am a deep believer in many things and karma is one of them.....so I think these individuals, whether in a religious setting, or vocational setting, or something else will indeed reap what they sow.

Mom-Mom....that was indeed good of you to pm Pjc.  Many of us ( though as stated I'm not triple-neg ) do have chemo and do ok.  I had 6 mos. of first  A/C  ( 4 rds. ) at three week intervals, and then Taxotere ( 4 rds. ) at three week intervals.  I do have some issues, but due to a second aggressive tumor being found in the same breast during my lumpectomy ( un-known till then ) making two different kinds of tumor......I barely even considered the question of to do or not to do chemo. 

Not a walk in the park.....and I do know some people end up with damages from their chemo, but seemed to me, that I had to try to do what I could, when I could, if I could --- because my odds changed so drastically.  At first it was lumpectomy with maybe a week or two of rads.  That was when I had a small  ( most of it came out in biopsy tube ) non-aggressive Papillary tumor. 

I am grateful every day that I had such a wonderful surgeon -- who kept looking around -- why??? who knows, but something didn't seem right to her and I was the fortunate recipient of her nagging need to be sure that all was well. 

I hope Pjc does well.....and that Puffin finds her way back here. 

See you all later.

Blessings

Jackie  

Ok, then you are due another apology.  We are indeed old enough to be polite. I'm sorry I didn't realize you had been here before.  I hope you will continue to come from time to time and  join with us in caring for and about each other  and all of our fellow travelers in this world. 

Blessings

Jackie

Carole....my husband is from Northern MN...grew up in a little town named Grygla.  We own farmland there along with his 2 brothers, that was once the family farm.  Sold the farm house and some of the acres a few years ago.

Husband use to go to Minneapolis every summer with his Dad from his home town for a family reunion, and he said that my father in law well into his nineties would always ask to stop in Park Rapids McDonalds....he loved Mc D's (God bless his soul...he passed at 95)   Are the mosquitos bad by the lake in Park Rapids?

Mosquitoes in his hometown were as big as hummingbirds!

Di

Di.....that is so funny.  Not that the guy tried to back over you....that's horrible, but to think that was his answer to the situation.  I mean first you humiliate him, and the only way he feels he can get back at you is to run you down. 

Now if you could just get those glasses.  I had an experience like that.  Not that they were making the glasses wrong.  Their Optometrist somehow put down the wrong numbers and the lenses were actually not the right prescription.  They re-did them, but didn't re-examine my eyes, so the second set didn't turn out any better.  Then, they said they felt the frames I chose were not really adequate which totally confused me ( why would you have frames for sell that lenses wouldn't fit right in ) so I got another pr. of frames.  Well, of course, that didn't work either.  Finally went to another Optometrist  and he came up with completely different numbers.  So, I went back to the first place and told them I wanted my money back.  They would not refund the money for the actual exam....even though I could not benefit from it in any way, but I was so happy to be done with them I did not argue the point.  At any time the Optometrist could have done enough to find out his numbers were wrong....but he didn't.  Grrr. 

My husband went there and had no problem at all --- so things can happen.  Maybe the Optometrist was just having a bad day when I was there.  Just hope things will work out soon for you Di.  Fingers crossed.

Blessings

Jackie