INSOMNIACS place to talk in the wee hours
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Very Nice!!!!!
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We're all doing fine. Not much happening. Did get the bills done and worked on a newsletter that should have been done. Will get it finished tomorrow. Tinker is doing great and using the litter box.
Nice car dutchiris. Like new cars
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Ohhh Spookie 72 degrees sounds heavenly. My old 14 year old cat is laying on my back right now - he's so warm!!! The closest I'll get to warm today - cold crisp in the 30s for highs but sunny. Nice car dutchiris. What kind of car did Sass get? Happy New Year.
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Sun, 72 degrees. I know nothing of those things. We had icing over night, trees beautiful. DH called into work. Thanks Tang for thinking about us on the west side of the Metroplex. We've been just on the edge of it all day, but I think the ice line has retreated a county or 2 to the west. Raining and 33 degrees. Rain tonight, tomorrow, tomorrow night. We need the rain but I need sun, warmth. Little bit warmer Sat but much colder again Sunday.
It's mostly just DH, DD and I. I do have a brother, love him dearly but we live different lifestyles. Not that his is bad, not that. Just go, go, go. Not us. I could seriously live in the woods/snow as long as I had magnificent cable TV, unlimited heat and every book/mag published. Oh and all groceries delivered to my door. Not asking for much am I?
Sounds like hardly anyone is out on our road. There were some hardy souls shooting off fireworks last night. Those big deep boomers. We had a barred owl hooting it up real close by for a while last night too. I don't think any close neighbors shot any fireworks. Uphill neighbor does a good July 4th show but not sure he even had anyone over last night. Funny how cold/wet keeps you inside. Even dug out my little rat terrier's only sweater that fits her. I think she likes it. She is the hardest dog to fit for some reason. This is a little mini sweatshirt red.
I hope those that have been under the weather are on the mend.
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Dutchie, the car is beautiful! Enjoy it and be safe.
Laying low today. Having probs with BCO, I'm hoping the Mods don't ban me for making trouble.
You FL ladies are lucky! We only got to high of about 60* in sunny SoCal, predicted to go to 29* tonight. Yowza, big difference. Tomorrow, 61*/32*. Yikes! Staying in and staying warm.
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Happy New year to all
May You have a peaceful and good Year.
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Spookie, I could really use some of that 80 degrees. I just can't get warm. I think it's due to the Arimidex - and the fact that it is cold here. It has always given me cold chills instead of hot flashes. Great in the summer, but not so much now. It is sunny and that makes up for the cold.
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I agree with you on Arimidex I am always cold too
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Just got back from the last trip around the block with my 2 littlest dogs.. freeeezin I tell you. It has to be only 20 something. It was a quick tuck in piddle and scamper home. I saw a quote I liked today.
"We can complain because the rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice the thorn bushes have roses."
Abraham Lincoln
I like it.
Chevy you can't change family. I tried to bend over backwards towards some of my husbands family and never could break into their closed circle- or the kids either. It used to hurt me to the marrow of my being that my FIL would talk about his grandkids meaning only my DH's brother the doctor and his 2 kids. Never did my FIL fly out to see us, but he would fly out to play golf and vacation with that brother and their 2 kids. I thought maybe it was because we had a MR/autistic deaf kid and it bothered him, but his own DD is severely retarded. So for what ever reason the entire time we were married he made ZERO effort to get to know our kids. He's gone now. My MIL totally different, loving accepting wonderful. She died of CHF too young. I loved my MIL great woman.
Then my Mom really didn't give a chit about getting to know my 3 daughters either. They are the only grandkids she has! Her sister has been 100 times more of a Grandmother to my kids then my Mother. My Mom was poisoned by my Grandfather who was disappointed by having only girls. He wanted sons. (His own sperms fault!) Anyway when my Mom gave birth to 2 sons she was elated - Grandpa was THRILLED and she was redeemed. All the time growing up I was second class to the "boys." Kind of like a "sophie's choice" moment. No matter how my brothers screwed up my Mom stuck by them, paid for them, bailed them out etc.. They won't change. I know that now and accept their occasional attempts at communicating but I do not go out of my way to be involved in their drama. Done with that! I don't want my kids involved with it either! They don't visit and we don't visit. We have been on the West coast 25 years and neither of my brothers have been out.
The only thing that makes me sad is that the only relative my kids are close to is my mother's sister. They love her; we all do. Well she has 2 daughters both nurses and the oldest is quite the control freak, never married eccentric collects/ rescues animals, sarcastic and bossy. Since my Aunt's BC diagnosis my cousin keeps my Aunt on a tight leash. No talking to her since my BC experience was negative (negativity is not allowed) , no communication all through her surgeries and chemo- in short shut off, months of silence. She made no attempt at even telling us how my Aunt was! So now the one relationship that my kids enjoyed is ruined by the cousin. I really do not like her and after this last year 2013 and 2014 do not want anything more to do with her. Now it's a package deal see my Mother (the Aunt) and see me! Pitbull sentry. I'm done. My Aunt has friends for support but pretty much does what ever her daughter tells her to do. We won't be visiting them either. So that's it for family - ha it's our little nuclear crew and that's it! Life is too short. Forgive is one thing, but engage in the dramas no.
Just for the record I think Trazadone does nothing, except give me a headache in the morning. I took it hours ago and am still up - not the least bit sleepy. I wake up at 3 or 4am every night and take hours to get back to sleep. As a sleep med it sucks at helping me get to sleep and stay asleep. I am not taking any more after tonight. Thus ending my insomnia pill experiment.
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Rosie! That was FUNNY! "Tuck N Piddle"....
And I really like that comment about the "rose"....Yes, I know.... you are right... Your post just reminded me of a lot of other things I have overlooked over the years.... Stuff we put up with because we think we have to...
My FIL always told the whole family crap that was so hurtful whenever he got drunk.... And it was the SAME THING YOU heard! About his 3 Sons... I was married to the oldest, Carol was married to the favorite middle Son, and Maggi was married to the youngest.
So in his drunken rants we all heard how my Husband, his oldest Son could only swing an ax... meaning he could only make little girls...
While his middle Son, could chop logs, and make SONS! His youngest Son has not even been able to have kids... But it hurt me to the bone when he would SAY this! One time I got up from the table, threw the dish towel on top of it, and said "I'm DONE!" I ran to a bedroom and started to cry.
THEY left, but that is something you will never forget! My girls heard it too, when they were only 7 & 9.... They were too little the first time he came up with that witty comment!
Have to ask.... Did you marry into an Italian family? Because I did, and I'm just thinkin' that SOME of them are just down-right blood and thunder MEAN! And if you ain't one of "them" you ain't NObody.
It should have been legal to shoot that man for being worthless.
Some Mom's are just un-caring... and they DO let others run their lives... Like my MIL... She not once took my little girls anywhere... not shopping, not for a walk... not ANYwhere. But she was just a moron.
They baby-sat one time when Sheri was 3... We came back and the old-man had Sheri on his lap, trying to teach her how to smoke. See? And when we are in their "family" we think that in-debts us to any kind of treatment or behavior they want or DO!
I just think God has taken care of us... for doing what we could under the circumstances... and made US better Parents, and more loving partners, because we REALLY know what it's like to have our heart and our feelings stomped down by worthless people.
And we are still DOING it.... Ha! But we know how to just "go on"...
DLTBGYD.... right?
I think we must have inherited the same in-laws? I can't believe someone ELSE'S family was the same as MY in-laws.
Okay, I'll apologize for all these mean people... in one swell foop. Yours and mine... because WE came through it... mostly.
"Pitbull Sentry!" HaaaaaaaaaahHah! Some people you just can't force to be human. I made that up.... but we know what we mean...
How did we ever DO it? I mean the things we DID to get along with the In-laws? Or "family"?
22222222222! YOU are making TRUBBLE! Ah geez.... I just try and make you all behave, and not go in the dog-house! We have a "pit-bull sentry" in the house, so we keep all trubbles OUT!
LilGoats! 72 is that "degrees"....? Where ARE you... Bermuda? And you had "icing"???? I think that's called snow.... When it's over a foot then I'll listen....
Can you post a picture of your little terrier with her sweater? She sounds so cute!
Smarty! Those weren't OWL's! Just thought I would point that out!
But they were happy and cute! Ha!
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Guess who this is for?
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Chevy- your post just strummed all my strings. No we are not Italian. It's interesting my Mom's family were all Swedish/German (everyone went to college men and women and all were well off, hunters and all engineers!) and my DH's family is all Scottish, German and Swedish (valued education but couldn't afford to go depression folks, sent all their kids though). My Dad was Irish and English and came from a very poor family, but got a college degree with the GI bill. He had no respect for women, toys and handmaids for men. I remember sitting at the dining table with my brothers and asking my Dad if I could have a high school ring. He wanted to know how much they were and I told him.He said yes you can order one. Then my brother piped in I want one too! My Dad replied without missing a beat, "No you will get a college ring." Think about that. The message was girls don't go to college, men go to college. My Dad didn't help me at all, waste of money to educate a girl. I finished college, paid for it myself and headed off to graduate school to boot! Neither of my brothers finished. My Dad was physically and emotionally abusive,no drinking. My DH and his family not that way at all. They are well off and aloof. My stance- you can't take anything with you and if you have tried for years and made a good faith effort, give it up and move on.
Yes we survived and we did it for our precious daughters who have as much value as the boys! All the crap did make us better parents! So lets start the New Years celebrating the good we have and know where we came from and let it be. Pardon me for venting... sometimes letting the steam off does a world of good. Nice to know other women put up with the same.
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Chevy sorry about the stupid family thing. DH's family was that way. Mean. I was happy to move away from them from Ohio to Florida. Not good peopleTang, I think there's too much confusion on what happened to your friend. Have her call the Ombudsman/community relations specialist/risk manager/ CEO-president of the facility. This should be traced from the beginning to the end. The process is call Finding the Root Cause. There's another name, I can't think of( Total Quality Management?). Anyways all hospitals are required to have a mechanism to trace errors. They make a committee of all departments involved. Then they trace everything related to the problem. This isn't just for your friend. When the committee identifies what the errors were in the process, they make changes in the systems of how things are done, so, it doesn't happen in the future.
Dutchy Yay waking up
New car ---What kind? New toy and it runs--nice.Spookie, my Toyota van has minimal fancy stuff. It was the last 2014 on the lot. What it has though that I love is a great seat that doesn't hurt me. Expensive seat.
Chevy where's your memory. I bought a prius in June, the seat hurt my hips. I took it back to the dealership and got the van b/c of the seat. Took 6 weeks for the hips to recover YAY.
Yay Tinker...Smarrty, those are Sand Hill Cranes. Used to be millions, but now lot's less. They have adapted to living with people. They only live in nice neighborhoods where people treat them well. They mate for life. Neat to see them walk around with their babies.
HI1 ditto
Rosiegirl, Toyota 2014 van , silver, Nice SEAT. Gass hog compared to prius, but I don't drive much.
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222222222222 trouble? Ban? What? We have your back girl.
Teka and Foots Happy new Year
Rosie sorry about your family too. Bummer. I have a friend kayb that started using 5HT. she uses some other stuff too. I'll link to a thread I'm working on. Maybe you can find something in it.
Chevy fun pin about the little goat; Please put on W & F'sBlondie , Patty, Badger hugs
It's Friday, DBF working around the outside of the house like crazy. I didn't get up till after noon. Now feel ucky.
Need to check housekeeping threads
BBL0 -
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hi all. Just a quick check in.
Turns out others are having the same problems I was having yesterday, just BCO was really quiet. I lead a boring life! Kept notifying mods of problems and since I felt like I was the only one, thought they'd get irritated with me. So, not the case.
Have some quiet time to myself. Think I'm going to clean house, it needs it! BBL
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We are awaiting ice storms here. It's the worst thing about Oklahoma winters. Here, let me show you:
This was in 2002, we were without power for days. Made coffee on the gas grill's burner, we did at least have a fireplace. This pic was taken when we ran out of wood & went looking for more.
Let me tell, you, I do so identify with the family drama issues. Both of my parents came from fairly large families, Mom was 3rd of 7, Dad was 1st of 5. Mom's family was always close, spending time together as often as possible. I never knew any of Dad's family; I met one of his brothers once when I was 4. I myself was 4th of 6, I have 4 sisters and a brother. I always joked that Mom really only had 2 children, Bill and the girls. Even though the girls were spread out, the youngest born 2 days after the oldest graduated high school, once my brother came along, no one else mattered.
My dad was distant. He really never should have married. He spent 30 years in the Navy, most of it at sea. He was a Pearl Harbor survivor, but I never knew that until I was an adult and someone sent me a newspaper article with an interview he did. Everyone who met him thought he was so charming, he could tell stories, and jokes, and be quite charismatic. But with his family he was cruel, both physically and verbally. His favorite form of punishment was his Navy khaki web belt, which he used for such transgressions as a C in math. He used the buckle end. He drank, and at least in his later years I would consider that he was an alcoholic, but it wasn't alcohol that made him mean. He lived into his 90's, and I couldn't even tell you when he died.
My folks divorced when I was 17, my mom raised the 2 younger girls alone and I went off to be a hippy. I wasted most of my younger years, 2 failed marriages and a son placed for adoption. I am so thankful DH saw something of value and took a chance on me, even though at 36 I was 9 years older than he.
My mom & sisters & I stayed pretty close through the years, when one sister lost her DH to cancer, my DH stepped in and played dad to her two kids who were 6 & 9 when they lost theirs. The boy had some really rough years, and wouldn't have graduated high school if he hadn't spent his senior year living with us. DH was doing pretty well, so the kids got everything they wanted, and always had a place to come when they needed.
That all changed two years ago. I had a falling out with my sister, and it spread to the rest of the family so that I have not been in touch with them through all of this. I confess to some bitterness, after all we have done for all of them, for so many years. Ungrateful such-and-suches. Yet I do feel that my life is better without them, they certainly feel theirs is better without me, and I appreciate not having the constant drama, what someone described as "looking for a train wreck" (because if they don't have one of their own, they'll take someone else's).
And I'm also sad, because when my mom died in 2004 we had become a really tight-knit family, and we stayed that way for several years. But being a hermit by nature, I really don't want to go back to having a house full of people all the time. I'm sad for DH and my cousin who lives with us, as I know they miss them too. But when people are toxic to your life, you sometimes have to learn to live without them.
OK, I know the rest of you have stories! Let's get them all out there and then burn our bridges and go forward into 2015!
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I guess I'm not alone in crazy family stories.
Thanks for sharing so I don't think I'm crazy
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Me too, but I'll help burn the bridge.Mags so sorry it was so tough. I mirror allot of what you went through. The Belt. UGH. Today they'd be arrested.
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burn baby burn
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TMI on what I wrote before. Mags I understand completely about the relief of leaving toxic people behind. I love solitude too. We can have a bonfire burn the old memories.
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Mag. Sorry I haven't been on lately . Moved two years ago April. Lived near Augusta, in Readfield
We had one major ice storm about twenty years ago in Maine. We had wood heat and a gas stove. Water was the issue. We could hear the branches breaking because of the ice for days.
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Interesting read
Hugs all around
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Morning gals... I know I posted after you did Mags, but somehow it is gone! Maybe I didn't submit it right or something? But all the things you said really hit home here.... About the belts.... etc. Hurts to talk about it I know.... so maybe it's better I "lost" my post. Doesn't help anything anyway.
Morning Blondie and Sailing! Yes Rosie.... we leave the toxic people behind.... Don't need people in our lives that bring us down.... We can do that all on our own....
So we start a Happy New Year... ! If something makes us mad.... or someone.... Just hit them over the head with a cast-iron skillet.... Or just remind yourself that getting caught up on needless drama, only hurts ourselves...
We can make it without anyone else.... or anything! Except I need Chocolate Cokes occasionally, mashed potatoes & gravy, Broccoli, Walnut, Cranberry salad, and YOU.... my friends! Even Husband and MY family too! xoxoxoxox
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My family is not especially close, excepty I am with my younger sister's family. We don't live near. However, a great disappointment to me is the behavior of my exDIL. She left my son for someone else, which in itself was sad but that's life. She tried to take kids away from him in a state that has 50-50 custody. It was such a surprise to me that she could be somean and petty. Not the girl I was so close to. I don't need to go into details. I know you get it.
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Yeah we do..... I always feel bad for the Grandma's that lose their Grand-kids with a divorce.... especially when the DiL takes them out of State.... I had a hard ENOUGH time when they were grown and moved OUT of State.... the whole family!
But I know a few women, that have "lost" their Daughter's when they got older..... I can't imagine not "talking" to mine all the time.... Something must have been so traumatic in their lives, for them to not even want to see their Mom. My friend here, hasn't talked to her Daughter in over 30 years, and she lives in the same State....
And another gal-friend only hears from her grown Daughters every few months.... and same thing.... they all live here! A bitter divorce which those two can't get over, has a lot to do with it I think.....
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Spookie-----------that is so true..............It sucks that it's so true. Oh well we will survive0 -
I agree with toxic family, I have 2 brother here in Washington
that I never see unless they need money or steal from my shed.
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LOVE THE TOXIC MUG!! It is so true, we have enough to deal with we don't need any grief added to our day. Sadly we all have a story, or two, or more, and crappy friends, and a ex or two. But here we have each other, to support and move on! Have a great night!
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