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Mar 1, 2021 03:19PM
runor, you "bristle at Pointless Positivity"? Really? I'd never have guessed!
I can identify with what you've written. The only thing I will add is that it's not just cancer that hurls you into the group of 'those who get it' and away from the people who don't get it. There are other diseases that do that, and other life events. I moved into that group years before I was diagnosed with breast cancer with a kick that was a lot harder than my breast cancer diagnosis. Most people keep this change in life perspective to themselves unless they know that someone has had a similar experience. For the most part we know on which side family members and most friends land, but we don't know for acquaintances or colleagues or strangers. There are more people in the "those who get it" group than you'd think.
I admit however that when I know that someone is in the "don't get it" group, I think how lucky they are to have not experienced something that has forever changed their outlook on life, adding the realization about how quickly life can change or even end. But when I read a post from someone who is terrified about a callback or a biopsy, saying that it's the worst thing that's ever happened in her life, while I do think how lucky this person is, I also remind myself that "the worst thing that someone has ever experienced is the worst thing that they've ever experienced" (as someone very wise once wrote on this site). I know that I can't apply my experience to their situation, and for them, it really is that awful.
moth, that is an interesting perspective to add to this discussion. It's sad to think that there are people who hide their heads in the sand until it's too late. I suppose the choice all of us have made to get the tests, ask the questions, take one step at a time and move forward one day at a time shouldn't be taken for granted. That's a good reminder. And I'll second ctmbsikia's comment. You do so much more than just show up. BCO is very lucky to have you!
Dx 9/15/2005 Right, 7cm+, DCIS-Mi, Stage IA, Gr 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR- ** Dx 01/16/2019 Left, 8mm, IDC, Stage IA, Gr 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- (FISH) ** Surgery 11/30/2005 MX Right, 03/06/2019 MX Left ** Hormonal Therapy 05/2019 Letrozole