Join Us

We are 216,296 members in 84 forums discussing 160,162 topics.

Help with Abbreviations

Topic: Always in the back of your mind

Forum: Moving Beyond Cancer —

Managing life after a breast cancer diagnosis, including rediscovering intimacy, coping with fear of recurrence, reconnecting relationships, sharing hobbies and interests, and finding inspiration in daily life.

Posted on: May 18, 2019 12:36PM

SophiaMarie wrote:

I’m 6 years out. Recently had some head/brain episodes that led to a brain mri to check for metastasis. I found out Friday that all is fine (except no explanation for what actually happened). I was doing ok yesterday (the day I as told I’m fine), but I spent all last night crying. For several days before my appointment, I feared mets and that I’d leave my teenage son without a mother. High anxiety! Now it’s all releasing.

My drs sweet nurse suggested I see their oncology psych for help with coping with the anxiety. I’m skeptical that anything could really help, aside from Valium. 🤔 How can we NOT have anxiety when we’re faced with the possibility of metastasis? I honestly don’t spend my life worrying - I’ve felt like I’ve gotten on with my life. But when you have strange symptoms, why wouldn’t we get concerned, knowing the potential?

I’d love to hear how you all cope with scares. Are you taking any meds? In support groups? Or do you just roll?

Dx 7/2013, IDC, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 8/4/2013 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel Dx IDC, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
Log in to post a reply

Page 5 of 5 (135 results)

Posts 121 - 135 (135 total)

Log in to post a reply

Nov 12, 2019 11:13AM FindingBalance wrote:

Had an MRI on left shoulder yesterday, see the sports med doc Friday for results. Wasn't really worried until after the test and now have to wait several days. Trying to keep busy, hoping that my instinct is correct that my shoulder issues are really just a continuation of a lifelong battle with tendons and joints.

I look forward to the day we forget what cancer is. Surgery 12/27/2011 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Dx 12/29/2011, DCIS, Left, <1cm, Stage 0, Grade 2 Dx 12/29/2011, IDC, Left, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Radiation Therapy 2/7/2012 Whole-breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 8/20/2012 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Hormonal Therapy 11/7/2018 Femara (letrozole)
Log in to post a reply

Nov 12, 2019 11:14AM edj3 wrote:

Yeah--every time I have something new going on, I am trying to keep the attitude that those hoof beats are horses, not cancerous zebras. It's hard.

Tried the tamoxifen, no thanks. Dx 4/9/2019, IDC, Left, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 5/5/2019 Lumpectomy; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Dx 5/6/2019, LCIS, Left, <1cm, 0/1 nodes Radiation Therapy 6/2/2019 Whole-breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 9/22/2019 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
Log in to post a reply

Nov 12, 2019 02:35PM edwards750 wrote:

I don’t think there will ever be a day at least for me when a constant ache or pain isn’t attributed to BC. We’ve been branded with the C word always looking over our shoulders but as time passes not as much. My MO told me if a pain persisted for 2 weeks to come see her. Fortunately I didn’t have any issues.

8 years last August.

Diane

Log in to post a reply

Nov 12, 2019 03:12PM 2019whatayear wrote:

Thanks for this thread. I'm pretty cranky that even though as far as we can know all the cancer was taken out w/my BMX - just one tumor and a little in a sentinel node and none in other 8 they took out- and even though I had clean Bone, CT and MRIs plus a transvag ultrasound to check out the ovaries etc. before starting chemo --even with all of that documentation I can't just relax and enjoy my course of treatments and not worry it's gonna come back. Total BS.


big hugs to everyone

-Vic

IDC 2 cm micromets 1 node 8 more removed. BMX 6/24, A/C then Taxol 7/25, 25 rads 1/6/2020 No reconstruction BRCA2 - BSO 2/19 all clear/ starting AI on 3/1/2020
Log in to post a reply

Nov 21, 2019 05:46PM HikingLady wrote:

Hello, fellow worriers and warriors! I had a bad headache, for a day, then another day, and a few days later, it had been a week. Pressure on both sides of my head. My MO had trained me after chemo ended to be alert to anything that could be a symptom of various types of mets, and "headache that doesn't get better over 2 weeks" was on the list of something that could possibly be Brain Metastasis. I was debating what day to go see my PCP or MO about this headache. Which doc, how to follow up, how long to Wait And See and Suffer, etc. before getting myself to a doctor.

Turns out, I had gotten new glasses the day before the headaches started, and they were too tight. This was the fastest ever cure for Brain Mets! Of course, during the headache days, I was positive that I had Brain Mets, because every hoofbeat's a zebra, not a horse, when we're living with some (very understandable) worries.

I went back to the optician and asked her to make the earpieces be less snug. Presto, Abracadabra, my brain cancer is cured. No more headache. You would think that I might have thought of this on Day 2 of new glasses, which was also Day 1 of new headache, but I did not. It took a whole week for me to consider this cause for the headache. Apparently, I see zebras everywhere. I know you'll all be excited that I cured my brain cancer so quickly. Ha ha ha, --that sentence must be said with dark, ironic humor......

Zebra is the American medical slang for arriving at an exotic medical diagnosis when a more commonplace explanation is more likely. ... Since horses are common in Maryland while zebras are relatively rare, logically one could confidently guess that an animal making hoofbeats is probably a horse. (Google's explanation)


Dx 3/2003, IDC, Right, <1cm, Stage IA, 0/2 nodes, ER+, HER2- Surgery 4/8/2003 Lumpectomy Radiation Therapy 6/9/2003 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 8/7/2003 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Dx 4/25/2018, IDC, Right, <1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 3, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- Surgery 5/22/2018 Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Prophylactic mastectomy: Left; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Chemotherapy 6/25/2018 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel) Hormonal Therapy 11/6/2018 Arimidex (anastrozole) Surgery 1/2/2019 Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant
Log in to post a reply

Nov 21, 2019 06:23PM - edited Nov 21, 2019 06:28PM by AnnC2019

edj3,

Do you have the FH mutation? That can cause leiomyomas. I had the breast cancer genetic testing and I have that mutation. I don't have leiomyomas but the doctor wanted to order a kidney MRI which I haven't done yet. I did have melanoma taken off my leg in September but luckily caught it early. I asked if the FH mutation can cause breast cancer and they said it is unknown

Dx 6/19/2019, ILC, Right, 3cm, Stage IIB, Grade 2, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Hormonal Therapy 8/15/2019 Arimidex (anastrozole) Surgery 8/28/2019 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 11/4/2019 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall
Log in to post a reply

Nov 21, 2019 07:14PM edj3 wrote:

AnnC2019, if that was included in my genetic screening, then no. Nothing popped for me. My husband says I'm an overachiever to have two cancers with no genetic mutations, which made me laugh.

I did get in w/ the derm for the re-excision today, he took a lot more (and showed it to me, was kind of cool in an oh my that's my flesh kind of way). He also strongly urged me to share the path report with my MO because of that tie to renal cancer. I see the MO's PA the first week of December so I'll have the original path report plus the one from today's pound of flesh removal.

Tried the tamoxifen, no thanks. Dx 4/9/2019, IDC, Left, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 5/5/2019 Lumpectomy; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Dx 5/6/2019, LCIS, Left, <1cm, 0/1 nodes Radiation Therapy 6/2/2019 Whole-breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 9/22/2019 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
Log in to post a reply

Nov 21, 2019 08:51PM DogMomRunner wrote:

HikingLady - I would have also been convinced I had a brain tumor.

You ain't run far enough to say My legs have failed You ain't gone far enough You ain't worked hard enough You ain't run far enough to say It ain't gonna get any better. Nathaniel Rateliff Dx 4/24/2019, DCIS/IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 3, 0/8 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2+ (FISH) Surgery 5/17/2019 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel Targeted Therapy 6/6/2019 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 6/6/2019 Taxol (paclitaxel) Radiation Therapy 9/22/2019 Whole-breast: Breast
Log in to post a reply

Nov 22, 2019 06:40AM arizonaboundgal wrote:

Great post, Hikinglady. Thanks for the laugh.

Enjoy every sandwich--Warren Zevon
Log in to post a reply

Nov 22, 2019 05:36PM 2019whatayear wrote:

Thanks for sharing that story Hiking lady! So glad it was your glasses!

IDC 2 cm micromets 1 node 8 more removed. BMX 6/24, A/C then Taxol 7/25, 25 rads 1/6/2020 No reconstruction BRCA2 - BSO 2/19 all clear/ starting AI on 3/1/2020
Log in to post a reply

Nov 22, 2019 07:20PM TB90 wrote:

Hikinglady: zebras are everywhere. When my mom was dying of cancer and we were caring for her in her home, one morning, I noticed her squinting and reaching for things that were not there. I thought, oh no, it’s gone to her brain now. After watching her and feeling devastated, my sister yells, “has anyone seen my glasses?” We had put her glasses onmy mom. My mom was such a trooper, she laughed and then asked whether we put her teeth in her mouth or whether they too belonged to another. She was amazing. And died only one week later. I hate zebras 🦓 but love humour and stoicism.

Dx 11/28/2013, DCIS, Grade 2 Surgery 12/17/2013 Mastectomy: Left Radiation Therapy 2/19/2014 Breast
Log in to post a reply

Nov 22, 2019 08:11PM VLH wrote:

HikingLady, loved the moment of levity! When we feel anxious about every anatomical oddity, it's a good reminder that they often end up being nothing worrisome.

Dx 5/20/2016, IDC, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2- (FISH) Surgery 7/14/2016 Lumpectomy: Left Dx 7/18/2016, DCIS, Left, Stage 0, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes Surgery 7/25/2016 Lumpectomy: Left Chemotherapy 10/10/2016 AC + T (Taxol) Radiation Therapy 9/5/2017 Whole-breast: Breast
Log in to post a reply

Nov 23, 2019 05:55AM Rah2464 wrote:

Haha HikingLady thank you for the giggles! I would have totally been thinking the same

Dx 5/23/2018, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 6/27/2018 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant Hormonal Therapy 7/27/2018 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
Log in to post a reply

Nov 23, 2019 06:28AM - edited Nov 23, 2019 06:41AM by AnnC2019

hikinglady thanks for injecting humor into a difficult situation we all face. When I was first diagnosed I hoped I would have at least five years because that would give me time to plan. My aunt sent me a prayer booklet from the Grotto/Saint Peregrine in Portland, Oregon and in it there was a section about cancer giving us the gift of being able to plan and reflect, unlike a sudden death. I guess even in the most awful of circumstances there is something to learn or gain. I guess that is easier to say if you aren’t stage 4

I am a caregiver to several family members with different issues and a single mom. My biggest worry is that my current family are all on the way out and my daughter will be completely alone if I pass. Her father died when she was a child. I could have benefited from therapy but never went. At this point, I am just taking each day as it comes and will slowly plan for a shortened life span if that is in the cards. Saving money so I can leave as much as possible to my adult daughter wth the idea that not worrying about survival can sweeten the day a bit.


Dx 6/19/2019, ILC, Right, 3cm, Stage IIB, Grade 2, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Hormonal Therapy 8/15/2019 Arimidex (anastrozole) Surgery 8/28/2019 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 11/4/2019 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall
Log in to post a reply

Nov 25, 2019 02:14AM Jumpship wrote:

Ann-

How sweet that you are saving for your daughter. We are right about the same stage and I'm hitting 5 years so here' hoping we have decades left!

I looked in the mirror this weekend and still don't know who I am. My eyebrows look like my mom's --but not when she was 50, but when she was 80! Does that mean that this old body is like 80 and will wear out soon? I still think my eyes (browns and lashes) look like I finished chemo a few months ago. I can't get used to it. I feel like I have to balance being here a few more years and not pushing this body too hard, and planning for a regular future with retirement. Save $$ for retirement or pay $$ for complementary treatments and lubrication stuff to make every day an okay day? Oh!

Negative for 16 of 17 gene markers. Positive for NBN-marker of unknown significance. Dx 7/2/2014, IDC, Left, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (FISH) Surgery 9/29/2014 Mastectomy: Right; Prophylactic mastectomy: Left; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Targeted Therapy 11/20/2014 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 11/20/2014 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel)

Page 5 of 5 (135 results)