Exchange City
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Good to hear Scuabalady
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congrats to you scuba lady! Heal quickly and rest.
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froste, Amdrea, two...grief. I miss the old me also. I smile and have a chin up attitude. This is my safe place to fall. My one year diagnosis is at when breast cancer awareness month begins. I am grateful but it doesn't mean I want everyone to remind me gratitude is the only emotion I should have. Maybe we need to write our old selves a letter or something. What would you tell your pre-diagnosed self? I may just to that. I miss her but shear cancer and I do not...
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I love the idea of a letter to our old selves! I'm going to do that and share some thoughts when I'm not all spaced out on my meds
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Really good 2nd post-op with PS this morning. Basically he reassured me that everything I am feeling is normal, and all is looking good. Continue to wear soft bra for 8 more weeks, but can remove at night. I can start exercise walking and doing LIGHT stretching to get arm movement back. NO LIFTING, and much to my husbands dismay, no doing dishes LOL. Start to massage incisions. If they do not flatten out, he will fix them. I can drive when it doesnt hurt to wear a seatbelt, and am not on narcotics. I get to go back to work October 6th. Hmm what else....oh, the tired, droopy feeling...it has been said that it takes approximately 1 week for your body to get rid of the effects of 1 hour of anesthesia. My surgery took about 4 hours. I am just going to give myself a break. All in all, it was a very good Dr visit
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Twoam: glad you're doing well!
Speaking of emotional responses--hugs to everyone who is struggling with them. I had read the header several times and was trying to brace myself for emotional responses after exchange. (I'm exactly two weeks out today.) I was expecting the sadness or the fear, but instead I'm obsessed with the implants not being large enough! I suppose I knew I wouldn't get the past back, so I put all my emotional hopes on having something new that was perfect. Of course we all know that nothing is perfect, and you're bound to be disappointed if you expect perfection. Still, I suppose the whole exchange thing is so emotionally fraught because it's about making peace with your changed body. Maybe I wanted/expected to look like a stripper instead of a 45-year-old mother of two! I know I should step away from the mirror and quit thinking about boobs!
Still, I'm hoping they "fluff" into something that looks bigger!! There's hope, right? : )
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Twoam, that's great! I see my PS tomorrow morning, and is hope he pulls my drains, since they're under 30 now. My prophy side feels great, no discomfort there at all, but it's never given me trouble. Rads side still hurts and feels irritated. Silly me was hoping to go back to work on Monday, but I don't think that's going to happen. I'm still very tired, and headachy. I haven't been able to sleep flat yet, and being propped up doesn't make a good night's sleep. I'm a side sleeper anyway, so getting decent sleep is challenging.
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Oh, Drains are so draining! I hope they come out for our tomorrow!! Seriously, they suck every last bit of OOMPH out of you! I hope that rad side settles down. My rad side is definitely crankier two weeks out.
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Good news two am! That sounds like a good time frame for exchange. Andrea there is no way I could go back to work Monday I am too pooped. I did have a little more work done and my lift side that wasn't bothering me at all before is really giving me some zingers in the nipple now - ouch! They initially told me I would be back to work in 4-6 weeks and I was determined to be back in 4 we'll see if I make it. Not gonna push myself cause once I'm back, I'm back.
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Oh Ladies, just a funny story about after my 2nd exchange Im very happy with the results so far but subconsciously must be fighting those exchange emotions. Woke up about 4 this morning after having a dream that I stood up to do something and my right implant just burst out of my right side and flew across the room!!! LOL
TwoAM, remind me what style implants did you get?
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KLJ thanks for the suggestion. I am going to try the fluffy socks. At this point I will try anything.
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Cateyz - 410's. FF 535cc. That would be a very scary dream!
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Elizabeth, I'm sorry to say that they won't get bigger. They will, however, stop looking so much like man-boobs or the top half of a hamburger bun. My first ones (rounds) looked like Chinese take-out boxes that had been soaked in water so they leaned to one side... and then stuck under my chest muscles.The "edges" will smooth out soon and the odd shape (which can be different on each side from day to day) will change into something that looks like a nice mound. Bigger, no. Just more pleasing than during the first weeks/months. Especially with rounds, the pec muscles will loosen a bit, allowing saline to settle more towards the bottom so you will have a more pleasing result. With anatomicals, the cohesive gel isn't liquid-y like saline and doesn't move at all within the implant. If your chest muscles are tight or there is swelling from pocket work, it can distort the shape too.
During one of my surgeries, the implant on one side (gummie bear 410's by then) was replaced with the same kind/same size. (They often do this if they have to go back into the pocket. It's removed for the "fixing" and a fresh one placed back in.) You can really see the difference between the "new" side and the "old" side, even though the implants were identical. Took close to 3 months before the new one to totally match the old one.
I think foobs look like you are wearing a tight, invisible minimizer bra all the time. (If you had nipple sparing it may be different.) I have rounded mounds, they're not cone shaped like before. It's not like reupholstering a sofa (same couch - different stuffing.) When I got fitted by the Wacoal rep for a bra, I couldn't fill out any of the cups 'cause my "ends" were missing, and I was wider than the cups. So frustrating and disheartening. She finally found some stretchy styles that would do. (There's a whole thread on bra recommendations elsewhere on BCO).
Women continue to expect "perky" boobs like a 20 year old. That's NOT reality. You are going to look great in clothes, but unless you educate yourself ahead of time, chances are you're going to be disappointed.
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Elizabeth - hope you can step away & quit looking. It's only 2 weeks. Sandra's right, it can easily be 3 months before things settle down. Trust me, I spent my 3 months moaning because I wanted to be smaller. I have Allergan 410s and things look good w/clothes & without now, but I still think I would have been happier smaller.
And for heaven's sake, don't spend lots of money on bras yet. It's good to start investigating but you will most likely not be the same in 3 months.
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Is that true for the shaped implants? I have the Sientra shaped and I am wondering how much they will change. Do they do the Drop and Fluff too? I saw my PS today and he said my swelling was pretty minimal, I am a week out from exchange and wonder if things will stay pretty much the same.. I am happy with the results so either way I am fine..
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They do not "drop & fluff" like rounds do, or at least the Allergan do not. But they do "settle in". I'm not familiar with how the Sientras behave. But there is always swelling. I didn't think I had much swelling either until I saw the difference a couple of months later.
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Good to know, Thanks MinusTwo!
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Here's a picture taken after a previous surgery that shows what looks like two different sizes, but they are the same. One is 3 months old, the other is brand new. It sits higher and has a distorted shape because a capsulorraphy had just been done. Three months later they looked exactly the same. The angle makes the foobs look HUGE, but they are both Allergan 410's FF 740 cc's.
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Twoam- I don't know what I was thinking, well lack of thinking is more like it as we have the same ones and I even commented on it the other day. Blaming it on delayed surgery foginess
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Cateyz - Totally understandable! I was just sitting here thinking of a question I wanted to ask, and I know dang well I already asked it, but for the life of me I cannot remember. I had my BMX and Exchange all done in less then 3 months. Between the anesthesia and pain meds, my memory and my brain is mush!
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Sandra - Are you having surgery tomorrow? If so, my thoughts and prayers are with you.
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Sandra, good luck tomorrow! Can you refresh my memory on what you're having done?
Good luck, Linda505 too!
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Sandra thank you for the visual. I have allergen 410 640 and not thrilled with the looks of it. My Ps tells me to be patient that it and my lifted side will change, seeing is believing!
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Elizabethaw, that is the word I have been looking for,,,,,, grieve,,,,,, I have never grieved for myself , for others of course if there was a death, but I guess now that I am thinking about it,,, there was a death,,,mine,,,, my old self,,,,, I do not know HOW to live in this new life,,,,,everything has changed,,,,,I have changed,,,,,,my life has changed,,,, and my body has changed. I will be reminded every day for the rest of my life that "I HAD CANCER"....... I should focus on that word,,,,HAD, and be greatful I no longer have it and there are women that have had to have Chemo and Radiation, and have it soooo much worse than I do, and I think they are the strongest women on this earth!!!! I wish I knew how to move on or where to start,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,I too will be writing my old self a letter and try to figure out who we are now, Thank you for the advice,,,,,
Scuba lady,,, congrats and take the time to heal,,, I know we have all heard,,,,, just because we can do it doesn't mean we should,,,,,and
Frostecat,I am still getting some " zingers" on my lifted side and I am 2 months out,,,,hang in there,,,,
Healing hugz to everyone,,,,,,, J
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I know we can't see the results of our surgeries till the swelling goes down, but dang, if my rads side gets any smaller, it will disappear. I can't see any swelling really and it's a lot smaller than my other side. Sigh.
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Oh my gosh yes...I didnt realize tomorrow was already the 19th!!! Good luck tomorrow Linda and Sandra. We will be thinking of you!!!
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The infection I "acquired" after the BMX was a nasty gram-positive one that ran wild for 3 days in spite of different antibiotics - until they pulled out the big guns - IV vancomycin. I lost most of the soft tissue, muscle, and skin on my left side below the axilla down about 8" and 1/3rd up the side of my brand new left foob. These surgeries are all attempts to repair the damage and decrease the residual pain in the process. The PS will be doing extensive pocket work (again) to try to alleviate the tension that keeps distorting the left implant. If it doesn't work, the only option left is Lat Flap surgery
which I'm trying to avoid. I've got too many muscle problems already and don't want issues in my back too. So I'm hoping the 5th time is the charm and we can move on to fat grafting in a final #6 in about three months.
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Oh Sandra, I didn't know you had been through so much! I'm praying for a great outcome and that the pain will be gone.
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jeaniebeanie - That is the very best description in words I have seen, that describe how I feel also. My husband was trying to be consoling one day and said "Dont worry hun, your still the same person on the inside". I told him I am not the same person on the inside at all. But you know what? Im not entirely sure I dislike this new person. Its so damn hard, but I think I might like the new me better then the old me. We just have to get to know eachother better. Its been a good long day. Took my meds, so please forgive my babbling LOL. Off to bed to massage the new girls, and hopefully not dream about my foobs popping out like Cateyz! We all can do this. And the best part is, we all have eachother. Much love and Goodnight.
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Good luck tomorrow Linda and Sandra, wishing you both surgeons with steady hands and minimal healing,little pain and get plenty of rest
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