Exchange City
Comments
-
I can sleep on my side with a pillow between my knees and my boobs....I got one of those body pillows and tuck a little of it between the girls. LOL.....Not much room for DH.
Happy holiday to all...hope you are doing something fun and enjoying life
xxoo Kathie
0 -
Angel & Allison. I am a side sleeper and that was one of the hardest things for me was sleeping on my back after the BMX. There was a period of about a month with the TE's when I could sleep on my side and then it was uncomfortable again after the exchange. I am happy to say that as the implants softened and "fluffed", I was able to sleep on my side again. It wasn't comfortable at first but I kept trying! I don't wear a bra to bed but I do through the day because I don't like the feeling of going without one.
Karen ~ You are a true horse person like my daughter! She loves grooming, riding, picking their hooves, and the smell of the stables. She rides about 3 times a week and if you are EVER in San Diego, let me know - we could take you to the stable so you could groom and probably ride if you like.
Annie ~ I agree with a second opinion. I had what I thought was going to be a prophy BMX and they found DCIS in my one breast. I had been dealing with ADH and vigilant surveillance for 3 years and the peace of mind that comes with not having to deal with waiting for the other shoe to drop was worth it to me. Your situation may be different but it is always helpful to me to get as much information as possible when I'm making a decision like this one.
Jan ~ So glad your sister seems to be doing better.
Peg
0 -
Annie, I decided to have BMX when I found out it was ILC, which tends to be bilateral, and I tested pos for BRCA2. When they did the pathology on the "good" breast, they found IDC in it, and that was AFTER chemo!
You have a right to a second opinion, and I would definitely recommend talking to your onc about that decision, as they are usually the ones who make a treatment plan for you. You have been through a lot already.
KEW, I grew up with horses, too, but had to sell mine when I became a single mom back in the 80s. Hopefully I will ride again soon!:)
Deen
0 -
Hi ladies!
It is late and I just finished cooking for a party of 20-25 tomorrow.. ( I am ALWAYS entertaining it seems...)... anyway...
ANNIE...my input.
insurance was MADE to cover a woman's Bi-lat so that a woman may MATCH... it is the LAW.
I care for you.. I respect you.. and I hope for you. I do not know your surgeon ( your friend??)...
I will give you my opinion as you asked.
You surgeon is very arrogant.
IF THE LAW.. in the USA .. is to give woman a bi-lat souly for the purpose of looking whole... THEN WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY is your personal doctor better than the law???????????? This irks me Annie.
If you do not want a bi-lat.. FINE.. your call.. WHY.. because our new LAW in the USA says it is your call.. if you do want one.. just so you look the same.. and feel good.. then OUR LAW say it is YOUR CALL... NOT some ARROGANT BS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
I am sorry if he is your friend... a true friend would NEVER do this to you.
Annie... I am really not happy for you... about this.
It is your call....you asked our opinion,.... this is mine sister.
Love you.. and Blessings as you make your choice...
I am so sorry you have it to make!
Laura
Ps.. my first BS.. the best here in KC.. told me she would NEVER think mast for me.. I told her this is what I wanted.. she told me.. no... just a lumectomy for you.... I left.. and never looked back. EVER! My CHOICE.. MY CHOICE... YOUR CHOICE YOUR CHOICE!!! I went with the SECOND best here.. ( whatever)
You might choose to do nothing else.. or mast on the other breast.. YOUR CALL ANNIE!
0 -
Deen--I'm sorry you had to give up your horses. Seems like we give up so much as single moms, get so many beautiful things in return, but I am looking forward to seeing who I am once my youngest is on his own. I've been a single mom for 13 years now, three more years until he graduates from high school, and I have a little more freedom. I will graduate with my Masters the same month he graduates from high school! Then who knows what's ahead!
Karen
0 -
BTW
my HEALTHY breast was just that.. HEALTHY.. No cancer.. nothing.. 100% healthy...
I now have :
Peace of mind
Matching breasts
No more mamograms
No more sonogram
No more worry.. that the other breast will get cancer...
blah blah..
This is just me.. but I could care less about removing a 100% healthy body part...
It just means I personally will worry less..
0 -
Annie - My original BS suggested a lumpectomy and radiation. I wasn't thrilled over having to go through screenings either. Plus, my sister who is 5 years older than me, had IDC, Stage 3 less than a year ago. I got gene tested and I'm BRCA1+. After doing research, I had already made up my mind to have a BMX (even if I wasn't BRCA+). So glad I did it! I found another BS through a plastic surgeon that was recommended by a friend. I am so glad I left my 1st BS.
PLEASE get a 2nd opinion, or even a third!!! You deserve to have what YOU want!!!
0 -
I am floored that a surgeon would make a surgical decision of lumpectomy only!? How outrageous! I had a BMX and fought tooth & nail with my surgeon to get it - wasn't sure he was going to comply until the surgical schedule came out. It's our bodies, we're intelligent women; we make informed decisions; surgeons should not patronized us!!!!!
No bra for me - ever again if I can help it - tools of torture they are (especially the under-wire ones)!
Karen - my son lives in Portland and will be starting classes at PSU later this month; is that where you're doing your masters?
0 -
Hi Donna--
Yes, I will be at PSU in the Masters of Social Work Program. I'm really looking forward to it. I have to move within the next couple of months because my landlord is selling my house. I was going to try and buy, but decided that I want to go back to school more. I think I found a great apartment complex yesterday--had hoped to avoid apartments again in my life, but it makes more sense, and they take large dogs. I you are ever out here visiting him let me know! What year is he?
I was really glad that I had my BLM, especially when the path report came back and there was DCIS on the cancer side that had been undetected. There are no guarantees, but I worry just a little less with the BLM. It is definitely a personal choice though.
Hugs,
Karen
0 -
Hello dears:
Wow! I am overwhelmed by the wealth of opinion, info, experiences on here.
I had already flat out decided to consult the onc. In my own experience, the BM decision seems to be one that they need you to push on. I know that my own decision to go ahead with a completely unneeded (by the medical personnel) ooph/hyst has really calmed my mind...and BTW, medicos, lowered my risk even further.
I is my choice, it is my body. I am glad to have more time to make this decision as yes, I have been thru alot this past year and a half. I now feel confident in waiting til the summertime.
The big questions I will be putting to my onc are :
I do not want cancer in my other boob every again. Can you guarantee this with monitoring? If not, can you write me a letter saying that you agree with BILAT (on now unilat) decision and why?
What are my odds: Best guesstimate. Please consider the ooph/hyst and arimidex in there.
Do you agree with BS about the monitoring schedule? Is it sufficient? If it has to be a once every three months, I am not OK with that, and I need to find a new BS who is. Can you reccomend one?
I will take copious notes (14th) and be back on here to fill you guys in. Again, I will appreciate so much any and all feedback!!!
it seems to me, that the medical profession doesn't quite get it. We are not our boobs. Sure, we want new ones, and no of course we do not take this lightly. It is anesthesia, a long recovery, etc. But for the life of me, why on earth would I downsize and lift the other girl, if I can still get cancer in her? I know we can always have a local recurrence, but it's very rare, with a mtxmny.
It's the same risks, as I see it. BS does not agree, says the lift and reduce is much less and much less dangerous.
I really like this guy, but as head of surgery, (a Yale affiliated hospital), he may have seen too many people not wake up. he is a friend, but perhaps I need another BS's opinion. I may go to Sloan to get it. I will talk to onc about doing exactly that, he sent me to the grand high poohbah breast lady there to make sure I was OK with getting first surgery and for another opinion which he insisted on. Not like I was having any doubts!!!
Let's see what happens after onc. visit. I suspect as usual, it will all be left in my hands. Do you think this phenomenon is insurance based?
JK, Karen, I see you dxnosis is almost the same as mine! Do you mind my asking how you got a nipple sparing mtxmy with recon? My PS said he could do it, but I would end up with an eyebrown scar. I don't even know what that is?
Thank you one and all, I truly appreciate all the input, it helps clarify things a great deal. I could care less about losing a boob, now I see the new one I've got, who cares? Just restuffin' the couch cushions, right girls?
love to all
a
0 -
Annie, I'm going to chime in here also.... you asked.
Like all the other ladies here I believe that it's your choice. You NEED to do what's right for you and what you FEEL IN YOUR HEART is your best option. NOBODY has the right to tell you what you're going to do with your body. Your BS has the RIGHT TO SUGGEST what he thinks is best and to give you the pros and cons of each surgery...THAT'S IT.
I had ILC in my right breast and underwent a lumpectomy and then a second surgery for margins. My BS said that that's all I would need and of course, radiation. It took me a little longer than some of the women here to decide to do a BMX. I went the lumpectomy way first. When I told my BS that I didn't think I could live with waiting for the other shoe to drop he said" That's your choice, if that's what you want to do, then I'll schedule the surgery. Not only did I have the cancer side removed, I had the other breast removed as well. The biopsy report from both breasts came back clean...no further cancer invasive or in situ was found in either breast. I had removed for all intents and purposes, healthy breasts. I don't care. I have peace of mind, no more scans, no more mammos, no more worries about it coming back. Hopefully, after my exchange I will have 2 matching healthy breasts that will attest to my tour of duty in this war.....
Annie, do what's best for you and it will remove all doubt.........
Terri
0 -
I too am feeling the need to chime in. My situation is COMPLETELY different. I didn't have BC at all. I had a prophy bilat in June. I have had several years of finding lumps - having some removed some not - my mother passed during her bout with BC - my Aunt survived her bout(s) with BC - my grandmother didn't survive hers either. I got tired of being scared every year and having chunks taken every couple of years. My right breast got to the point that is stared at my left foot and my left breast just kind of sloped downward (as if to keep an eye on the gaze of the right one). Anyway - I do NOT regret my decision to have them BOTH removed. I have gone from an almost certain future of getting BC to a less than 5% chance of ever getting it. No, it has not been a fun summer - but I know I will survive it. I feel almost like a fraud for being here sometimes because I didn't have BC - but I am still going through a lot of the same things as everyone else here. And, quite frankly, my peace of mind is worth more than anything.
Allison
0 -
Annie--
I had an amazing BS here in the Portland area, she is the one most people try and get, she is confident, kind, and radiates a calm spiritual air about her. When she talked with me about option, Lump/single/double, I asked her about nipple sparing. She was concerned that my breasts were a little low and my aureola area was kind of large, but referred me to one of the very few PS in the Portland area who will consider doing NS. I really wanted to keep them if possible, it seemed important at the time. I went and saw PS and he expressed the same concerns as BS, but we figured we would do a lift later if needed--he was sure my nipples would be too low. I don't know what your doc meant by eyebrow scar, my incisions are from my outer aureola towards my under arm, but they are fading. The area from the BLM in November that wasn't reopened in May for the exchange is almost impossible to see, so thus far, I'm happy with my scars. When I saw my PS about a month ago he was thrilled with how things have settled and doesn't think a lift is necessary, you can see photos on the photo page, I'm going to try and add better ones--get a friend to take them so the angels aren't so strange. Oh, we filled very slowly only 50cc at a time up to 750, the last two were 75cc, and we waited almost exactly 3 months for exchange, and had scheduled the lift, that we are probably not going to do now, for this November, with the hope that we were allowing for better blood flow, new connections, etc.
I saw this as a chance to give doctors more experience with NS surgeries. If my nipples didn't survive, I wouldn't have had them with a traditional BLM anyway. My PS told me we would know right away if there was going to be any trouble. Day 2 after surgery when he took off my dressing, there they were, pink and they've been that way ever since. I have no sensation, but they respond to hot/cold, etc. I have to say that I don't have "perfection" I have some step off, and a bit of a double fold, but that is slowly going away over time, I think a portion of my scar on the cancer side may need to be revised, it is tight, but I am not unhappy. The longer I have them the more I like them and a few imperfections make me feel like they look a little more normal--I am still considering fat grafts to soften the step off, but now probably not until next summer, since I'm going back to school and work full time. I guess in the end if I don't have a lift, and decide not to do grafts, I will always look at women with a beautiful slope and think maybe if I didn't keep my nipples I may have that slope, but I don't know that, and for me the trade-off is worth it.
Of course I was told ahead of time that the tissue under my nipples would be examined while I was still under, and if there was an cancer seen, the nipples would go.
I love how my implants feel, it is better than I ever imagined, before surgery, surely when the TEs were in I was afraid that is how I would feel for ever, but I don't. I also love how they look even with their little imperfections, I'm not perfect in any other way, why should I expect it in my girls?
I have to say, that the first time I stood alone in my bathroom and looked at myself, even though I was bruised, with drains, steri strips on the sides, and flat--he only put in 150cc to start, I was still able to recognize me, having my nipples dampened the emotional trauma of the surgery greatly, for me, but that is just my experience.
Sorry for such a LONG answer.
Hugs,
Karen
0 -
((Laura)) Dear Laura, I loved reading your post in response to Annie. So, what did you really think? Thank you for being the "Boob Advocate" This is the other book end to the "Boob Whisperer" It could also be changed to "Foob Advocate and Foob Whisperer" I would want you for my advocate if some silly Dr. or insurance company didn't allow me options/decision making capacity in what was happening to MY body. Grrrrrr back at ya!
((Allison)), so you pre empted cancer and you think you are a fraud? I think making the decision to to a bilateral mx as a prophy would be a harder decision to make than after the dx of cancer. You are a hero to take your healthcare and genetic risks and minimize it by taking action. You are still going through the same process as everyone else here, so hang in there sister, you belong!
((Terri)) Your post was great, I have read about so many women that had the lumpectomy and had to go back and have a mx within a few years as the cancer returned or a new cancer developed. For many women with just one spot of BC the lumpectomy is just dandy. I was totally shocked when the BS pointed out the 2 other areas on the mammorgram of probable BC. I was emotionally prepared for a lumpectomy with radiation as advised by my PCP, onc and radiation onc. Needless to say, I was very upset and my whole "Plan" of a lumpectomy went the way of my right breast! Needless to say, if this comes up again, I will see the BS first! not the other Drs as was set up by my PCP.
((Annie)) You are your own best advocate and the rest of us are the chorus line! I am glad that you are sharing your story, it needs to be told and the process of how you came to your decision are so helpful.
Jan
0 -
Annie- My first BS (who also did all general surgeries!) was a total pompous jerk. I call him Dr. Meanie! Anyway, he told me that he would only do a lumpectomy on me. I then started looking up surgeons who only did BS and found and amazing 33 year old, cutting edge doc who recommended a BMX for a DCIS!! Why? Well because I am under the age of 50, have 2 women in my family who have had BC and several other members who have died of other cancers, because if I took both she could check lymph nodes on both sides just to be safe, and if nothing showed up in my nodes than I could get out of rads and chemo saving my tissue and skin and body from that trauma in case some other strange cancer appears later in life!!! What a varied opinion, huh? Also, if I took both and if nothing showed up in my nodes I would not have to do tomix! No brainer for me!!!! It is YOUR choice- insurance HAS to pay for whatever you decide. And as it turns out- there was a precursor of cancer in my other boob!!! Find a doc who, like mine, is at war with cancer!!!! (she told me that's why she didn't want me to get implants over my pecs (as opposed to under) because she was at war with cancer and even though there is just a tiny bit of tissue that she couldn't check and as my warrior leader she couldn't go there with me)
Good Luck, I know it is all a lot to wrap your head around! It is YOUR choice! My Aunt went another way, had the lumpectomy, in one breast and is fine!!!! Has had no recurrence and no issues at all!!! I am a type A person, she is a very laid back person! It depends on your personality.
Above all, find a doc, who ONLY does breast surgery!
0 -
Annie as others have said you do what you want
if you choose lift and reduce make sure your surgeon checks your tissue for any cancer
this should be a no brainer but you never know for sure
I will admit some days I do wonder should of I had both removed
For me I'm going to see how my next MRI goes and decide from that...
0 -
I hope I didn't make anyone feel bad for their own personal decisions. Again!!!! I am very type A- I would have been thinking about it constantly and this gives me peace. Not everyone is like that. My Aunt chose the lumpectomy and her mother had a BMX!!!! She has been cancer free for 7 years- no issue's and no bad thoughts!
But, you can find aggressive surgeons out there!!! (if that's what you want!)
0 -
I had BLM 2 years ago and I miss my breasts. Not how they look - that's ok & will be better after revision surgery in October - but how they feel. Part of me is gone forever. BUT and this is HUGE - I don't worry every day about getting BC again. After the tumor board recommended one Mx, my next thought was then take them both because I don't want to go through this again. No you don't have bc; yes you do but it is really small and lumpectomy will take care of it; no we found another tumor now you need more surgery; on and on. Through all of that my daughter & I were planning her wedding and I'm wondering if I''m going to be here to see my grandchildren? I'm just not strong enough to be that afraid every day. So the BLM was the right choice for me. We each need to make the right choice for us, in our own situation, and our doctor needs to support that decision. 18 years ago when my mom had a Mx, they took muscle, everything. It took her years to be able to use that arm again. Swimming and brushing her horse are what rehabbed it. We are so lucky now that a Mx isn't as severe and work with a PT is possible. So Annie, I'd recommend you look at ALL of your options, not just for what is removed but also for what your quality of life will be afterwards.
0 -
I was very lucky that my breast surgeon really listened to me and allowed me to work it all out in my own head and heart.
When I was diagnosed and found out it was triple negative AND I had at least 1 positive node, I knew without a doubt a mastectomy was my route. My surgeon, she loves to preserve the breast and she told me all the statistics but I had already made up my mind. I only had one removed because I wanted as little chance of complications as possible so I could have chemo asap. BUT I always knew that I would never feel safe until that other breast was gone. So One year and 3 months later I had it removed and expanders placed. I felt sure that breast was clean...and it was.
I now have my implants in....its been one week since the surgery. They arent the same...they dont look the same, or feel the same. The biggest difference...for me....is these ones, wont try to kill me. soooo with that being said I am so happy that, like laura and the rest, I dont have to have a mammo again (of course my cancer was missed on a mammo).
If a lumpectomy is what works for you, then that is wonderful. We are all different. Do whats in your heart....your the one that has to live with it.
Teresa
0 -
Hey ladies.....dont know if you have heard about this, I missed it last year but I know a couple that went and they had a blast. Im definitely going this time. You get great pricing so take your friend, husband, partner or family member and have fun!
http://www.breastcancerwellness.org/cruise.html
Teresa
0 -
Pectoral Exercises and Breast Implants
I have been researching this issue and every piece of information I uncover seems to warn against exercises which bring about this "animation" of the breast implants. [If you have complete submuscular implants, I doubt this is a concern.]
http://www.realself.com/question/chest-exercises-pectoral-muscle-breast-implants
This shows one surgeon's response to this question, but scroll down for other surgeon responses:
0 -
Happy Labor Day......I have a quick question about nerve ending pain that I hope someone can answer. I woke up this morning with some pain which feels like it's behind the implant...at about where the nipple would be. It is not constant and it's minor. It feels like a sharp stabbing pain almost like a shock. The description makes it sound much worse than is it...in fact I would not even take a Tylenol for it. Is this some sort of nerve ending pain the goes along with the healing? I am about 18 days post exchange. I know it's not an infection because I had an infection (same breast) that I have been on very strong antibiotic for...and I can see the infection is cleared up...plus it doesn't hurt the same way the infection did. Thank you so much for any feedback!
0 -
Deborah- this explains why it is taking so long to heal for me!!!! He stitched me up big time under the arm. Something like 65 stitches in my pecs. Now I know why he wanted to go over the pec. His job as a PS is to make it look good. My BS job is to make sure cancer doesn't come back. It all makes sense all the recovery time for me with this!!!! For sure. It was a week ago Friday and I am still having to take vicadin to sleep at night. This must be why! He knows I am a swimmer so I think he was trying to save me from later issues! It was reasurring to read! thanks!
0 -
Deborah- this explains why it is taking so long to heal for me!!!! He stitched me up big time under the arm. Something like 65 stitches in my pecs. Now I know why he wanted to go over the pec. His job as a PS is to make it look good. My BS job is to make sure cancer doesn't come back. It all makes sense all the recovery time for me with this!!!! For sure. It was a week ago Friday and I am still having to take vicadin to sleep at night. This must be why! He knows I am a swimmer so I think he was trying to save me from later issues! It was reasurring to read! thanks!
0 -
Thanks Deborah...I have been curious as to what to do once I start feeling better! I have lost weight due to the complications I had, and had hoped to start an exercise regimen soon to feel stronger after what I have been through these past 6 months. My arms are flabby
but I should be able to do something for them w/o the pec workout. It is a shame, because I really don't enjoy weight lifting at all, but working the pecs always seemed a bit easier for me. Oh well....Alo, I have noticed pain once and awhile at what I think is my chest wall area, but it hasn't been severe, so I haven't asked about it so I can't offer you any help;.....sorry!
Thanks again!
God Bless!
0 -
Cheri2- Sorry your taking time to heal. You poor girl- it sounds like you had quite the exchange. Did you say you had your TE's removed from under the muscle to implants placed over?
0 -
Deborah,
Interesting post about exercise. My implants are completely sub-muscular, although I have Alloderm, I'll have to ask him about this. Anyway, he discourages me from any thing that will build up or engage my pec, so I don't bench press, or do some other weight training I used to do, also, in Pilate's or yoga, when I feel the girls getting ready to dance I just don't participate in the pose, or modify it in such a way that it isn't so intense. I tried doing a push up and it is not a pretty sight, my pecs tighten, some skin is a little loose----ugh, so I avoid that.
Thanks for your post.
Karen
0 -
Thank you Deborah for all your information! It helps so many of us !!
0 -
Thanks Deborah, the information has been very helpful to me. My doctor never said anything about limiting excercise, but I had concerns about the contortions that certain exercises made the implant do. I think I will minimize any pectoral exercises.
Question, do any of you ladies have what appears to be an air bubble in your implant? I get this small nickel size bubble that "floats" around the implant, at least I assume it is in the implant. Just curious if anyone else has this quirk.
Jan
0 -
Alo123- I think I have the exact same pain. I am almost 4 weeks out. It feels like its coming from where the nipple would have been, yet sort of behind the implant as well if that makes sense. It lasts a second or two and I have it periodically throughout the day, only in one breast.I was thinking it might be some sort of nerve regeneration.
Deborah- Thanks for the information. I really loved working my pecs, but I wouldn't do anything to make these implants any tighter.I am just looking forward to getting my arms back in shape.
Cheri-Glad you are healing slowly but surely.
0
