Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
Comments
-
Wren, under the circumstances, I think that a ranch-style house might make more sense than retrofitting your current place. There may come a time when stairs are difficult even with handrails on both sides.
0 -
Wrenn - I don't remember reading about your fall either and I am certainly sorry. Hope you can find a one story house. I seem to remember plenty of those in the communities surrounding Seattle. Wouldn't it be ideal if you could just sit in a chair and direct the activity - LOL.
0 -
I had x-rays today and nothing is fractured. She's referring me to physical therapy - I was expecting that. It's a relief that I won't spend more time laid up because something was broken.
Don't want a basement. We could add rails going down to the basement, but that's the only way to get things in and out of the house and it's just barely wide enough now. I would prefer a ranch anyway. That's what I grew up with and lived in in Houston, so it's pretty familiar. GS2's GF is in commercial property management and she's helping us look.
Minus Two, Isn't that everyone's dream, to have others do all the work? Someone having a company paid move said she had to take the day off when they packed to make sure they left the landlord's mirror and garbage cans.
0 -
I ran into a gf today who I haven't seen in years. She moved after 42 years in the same house. She told me of all the "treasures" they had to go through to empty the house. They did find in the attic a 3 piece Pyrex bowl set, a wedding gift never used. LOL Wren may you find some "treasures" that others pack up for you.
0 -
Good morning, Ladies. Pressuring washing the driveway, today. It gets mildew and nasty where water stands. The walkway is worse. It stays shaded. Hope everyone is recovering.
0 -
You cannot fail at being yourself. A cat doesn't try to be a tiger, and you shouldn't try to be something you aren't. You are a process, not a product. Your job is to discover what you are and create that creature. You still won't be perfect, but success isn't about perfection--it is about authenticity. You are a success if you are being your real, authentic self. -Bernie Siegel
0 -
So the abdominal CT scan was negative for any abnormalities related to the pre-cancerous polyp. So the plan is to go for the colonoscopy with the caveat of 85% success for complete removal and hope that I fall within this group rather than the 15% failure group as I have with every other BC related experience to date. Good luck has not been a stronghold position for me.
I had a very expensive oriental rug in the master bedroom that the restoration company in their infinite wisdom decide to cut up rather than try to remove intact. I do not pretend to understand their logic and now find that I am not going to be able to replace it with one from the country of origin because they are no longer produced nor available in the US. Plus trying to find one of comparable quality from another country of origin is also an issue. I really loved that rug and it turns out that it was most likely a one of a kind so this is just one more aggravating factor. As of August 1st, it will have been 9 months since the trees hit the house and we are not even close to the finish line (not even the halfway mark). Yes, Covid contributed to the delay but most was due to the laxity of the insurance company making us a priority. It is distressing to live in a house where there is clutter everywhere due to having to store items (some too valuable to be shipped offsite) from other damaged rooms; where clothing & shoes, furniture and other items have been in offsite storage for this time; and progress is dependent upon lack of coordination among the contractors. I need a Calgon moment, I guess, but I just want this to be over before it becomes a year and that's not looking too good. If this was a pregnancy, I would be due to deliver soon and I'd have something positive to celebrate. As it is, there are items that will need to be replaced or cleaned once we have a room completed and I cannot work on this since there is no more room for storage. Sorry for the whining but today is not a particularly good day.
0 -
Betrayal: ((((hugs))))
0 -
Betrayal ((((Hugs)))) This is just the reason we ( many of us from yrs. ago ) are still here. Maybe it is a variety, older age, accidents produced by nature, being ill and dealing with aftermaths that are not always favorable -- but we have those days. We all understand and we know that at some point it releases its hold on us and we feel better than the day we are having which produced the rant or as you said -- the whining. You are entitled to see the day however you need to , to get through it, and we are here for you, to support you as you do.
0 -
Our rains finally came. Overnight and then again this morning. We had some muted sun for a few hrs. but it now looks to be clouding up again. It will result in the same thing -- more heat and humidity. Not looking forward to that, but we were starting to need some rain with the higher temps we were having. So, we are at least wet again. The lawn will look much better.
Looking forward to tomorrow now and getting the cath. out. The first evening I took the Flomax I felt fine, but yesterday when I awoke I shortly felt body aches and a headache. WEATHER ALERT: It just started pouring down. Anyway, I felt some concern about se's though they seem rare for me. Today it all seems fine so I guess it was just the day for me to feel aches etc.
I hope you are all having non-inclement weather or heat and can enjoy your day.
0 -
Betrayal - love the comment "I need a calgon moment". I so remember that ad, but forgot about it till you mentioned it.
Illinoislady - love the saying.
0 -
We live in an "active adult" community and love the one-story life style. Went from 2400 sq. ft. to 1800 7 years ago in the same community. One step at the front and from the garage but had a friend who did a very ramp even over that. My experience is that some of these age-restricted communities do want you to think you will be young forever. In order to have a basement to move from Houston to Denver, mu SOL now has 8 stairs from her garage and in the front and a long stairwell from her deck. Not good. When we made that move, I was in a full leg cast from a achellies tendon repair. DH was great and move was close enough that he put lots of stuff in the car and just drove it over rather than packing it up. Wren, maybe it's time to give some of your treasures to family now so they can hear the stories behind them. Then you won't have to pack them.
Betrayal - we had a significant house fire 10 years ago and I too thought it would take forever. We were in a rental as the house wasn't livable but even that was a struggle. Hoping for lots of Calgon moments.
0 -
I had a nice day yesterday with Women's league golf in the morning. Then grass mowing in the afternoon. I perspired quite a bit and had leg cramps last night. My father had issues with muscle cramping so maybe it's an inherited thing.
Today will be laundry day so I will do quite a bit of walking back and forth to the laundry room.
Best wishes to those who are healing and to those dealing with day to day challenges.
0 -
Betrayal - I'd inquire at the restoration company as to why they cut up the rug. Hear them out, if it doesn't sound reasonable or logical, inquire if they have insurance to cover such missteps. Can't hurt to ask. But keep the bathtub running, so Calgon can take you away.
I'm off to workout in a gf back yard. We social distance, bring our own mats etc, and sometimes just socialize!
0 -
Good morning, ladies. cyber hugs to you, Betrayal.
Heat alert today and storm alerts for the weekend.
Thoughts are with all that are healing.
0 -
Ladies thank you for the caring support. I really appreciate a forum where I can post and not be judged when having a "bad" day and I've had my share lately. I would not wish them on anyone else but would really like a break from "bad news".
Having your house restored brings daily challenges, some a mere bump and others a near crisis. It's also a man's world so sometimes getting your point across (they really are not in to the aesthetics at times) requires the ability to go toe to toe and making oneself heard. They do not realize that my Dad insisted that I learn basic home DIY skills such as installing curtain rods that remain attached to the wall (unlike my BIL whose rods fell out within 15 minutes of the curtains being hung), changing a tire (today the lug nuts are on too tight for me to do it), painting a room, etc. and his gift to me when I went off to nursing school was a tool box that my classmates thought was funny until they needed its contents. I also learned a lot from my DB who is a general contractor and did a lot of the major renovations in my house such as kitchen, baths and refinishing the entire basement into office and entertainment areas. So I watched and also learned other skills. He is a perfectionist and once redid a corner on the crown molding 5 times before he was satisfied.
Part of this was a lively discussion about a change in the punch list over a ceiling replacement. What they had written in the contract was being changed to another solution which was much cheaper and less labor intensive. So I called them on it and asked for the price differential. The difference they quoted was shortchanging me by over a thousand dollars so I asked for their new calculation and subtracted it from the original quote to get what I was due. What annoys me is they were not upfront about the cost savings so if I did not catch it, they would have charged the previous full quote, done the substitution as they saw fit, and no one would have been the wiser. I did tell them I am using their punch list as my punch list and will call them on every deviation. So the credit will be applied to the larger gutters we requested.
As far as the rug, their answer made no sense since the rug was only partially under the queen bed. They had to remove the mattress, box springs and frame which were over the rug but they were discarded undamaged. They claimed the rug was wet so what did it matter? Well, the rug could have been dried and cleaned if intact according to the rug dealer who gave us an estimate on the ruins. To add insult to injury, they never told me they cut up the rug. I found it in pieces on the driveway and had a meltdown. You cannot believe the items my DD and SIL retrieved from the dumpster that were randomly discarded in their "clean out". No rhyme nor reason to discarding an intact gift that had been on the dresser and many other intact items. We were not here to supervise the "clean out" but should have been allowed to do so since the items they discarded had no value attached to them. They were instructed to "toss" so they did.
Due to code regulations we were made to install 2 egress windows in the master bedroom, they are huge and on the exterior wall over the steepest part of our lawn. It is meant for fire personnel entry and not for us to exit the house. So this meant having to figure out if the furniture would have to be rearranged, seeing if the overhead lights layout would then have to be reconfigured, whether curtain rods would fit above them, etc. and this is all in a shell of a room. Hard to make decisions and to visualize when there are only joists and rafters and no finished walls or ceilings.
I just had to have the electrician reposition overhead lights because he visited prior to the dismantling of the room and when there was still some structure to the room. So his configuration was based on those measurements and not the new structure. Only a minor blip but it means he has to move 3 of the 4 lights he had installed. So I am hoping once we have a ceiling in, they are in the correct position. Two were over the bed so with no bed, again hard to visualize.
My DS will bring lunch from Chik Fil A so that's a plus and a chance to see him makes it even better. Talking on the phone just doesn't cut it. Have a good weekend to all.
0 -
Betrayal, here's to Calgon moments (plus a tub and the mobility & get into & out of it). I have found that I have to ride herd on all kinds of contractors every step of the way. They live in an alternate universe, it seems.
Wren, congrats on no fractures. PT should work wonders, albeit slowly at first.
Ladies, just got some very sad (non-cancer, non-COVID) news this morning: my former boss and mentor passed away in his sleep early this morning at age 91. He had a massive stroke in 2012 that caused him to retire (and the law office to cease operations after I could complete unfinished cases); four years later, his wife (with whom I shared both an MO and PCP) died suddenly in her sleep. Earlier this year, age, grief and the stroke began to combine to take its toll on his body, and he entered home hospice in the past few weeks. His mind was sharp up till the end, and his family--who had been unable to see him due to the pandemic--was finally able to be with him since he moved to his son's house to be on hospice. May his memory be for a blessing. (Funeral will be private, shiva--condolence visits to family--will be virtual).
0 -
Sandy,
So many losses of friends as we get older and of mentors.I recently lost my mentor at Northwestern U Student Mental Health. She was my supervisor in the early 1980's, then after fieldwork, Rita became my best friend, like my mother, older sister. She established my Evanston practice for me by referring students. And, though she was 88, it feels like “ the curtain descends, everything ends, too soon, too soon." I'm sorry about your friend, mentor, boss.
The placque, not spelling this right, is a great, eye sparing development. So good- even if the reason for it is badthat you can have it.
0 -
Sandy and Keywest - sorry for your losses. No matter how old someone is, it hurts. May their memories be for a blessing
0 -
First I'm sorry Sandy -- wishing blessings as well and may the great memories remain in your heart and bring joy later on.
Well, finally my red letter day. No fan fare and just the snip of scissors as the Dr. cut the tubing ( in the rt. place of course ) and shortly was able to remove the cath. I am so wonderfully happy now. I did not do much today other than that safe for stopping by my friends ( Dr. B and Jo's house ) before making my first trip to Walmart ( grocery store section ) since July 14th. Quite a walk but so satisfying since I stayed at home rather than use the leg cath. and then have to switch back all the time. I have no true restrictions save for keeping anything picked up at 10#'s for the next three months. That seems a mite excessive in time. I suspect from force of habit -- once my stomach area stops telling me that it has five punctured places I'll likely pick something up and I only hope it is not too far over.
I've had some issues with my computer and have written the mods and only bring it up because I may need their help to get back into here later on -- like tomorrow. As it was when I was here it was saying I had to sign in to be able to post. It didn't say preview and submit at the bottom like it always does. Just odd, but hopefully it will all be figured out.
0 -
Sorry for your loss, Sandy. Grieving in the time of Covid is so hard. But to sounds like a life well lived and his memory will be a blessing to many
I, on the other hand, had an uplifting experience today rather than a sad one. My good friend and bridge partner was moved from her care home to her daughter's with Hospice. Earlier this week, her daughter called and asked me if I would sit with her for a few hours while she took husband with Alzheimer's to doctor. I hadn't seen Trish since we did a drive-by 90th birthday party in April. I was expecting the worse when I agreed. She tied quickly and needed to take a few little naps but she was mentally sharp and we really had a good visit. She said I that other than her minister, I was her only visitor since lockdown in March. She has made her peace but in the meantime, was interested in current affairs and the local gossip. She even had a bridge column she wanted to talk about. I felt honored that they called me rather than the Hospice nurse. I didn't get to give her a hug but it was a great morning.
It was 90 when Ken took Mutz out at 6:00 am and 114 when he needed to go again at 6:00 pm. But "it's a dry heat" as we tell ourselves in Arizona.
Hope everyone has a safe and quiet weekend.
Taco (Marge)
0 -
Sandy: So sorry for your loss. You have had your share recently.
As far as contractors, yes, they do seem to live in an alternate universe and I wish they would come with their own clean up crew. Their idea of cleaning up their messes and mine are in definite conflict. I am just so tired of dust.
0 -
Sandy, (((hugs)))
0 -
Sandy - sorry for you loss. As others have said it seems he had a life well lived.
Contractors - tree came down last Friday, stump they told me in 2 or 3 days. Today is a week. We leave for the cape tomorrow. I can hope the stump will be gone when we get back, but that's a fools dream. I'm sure on 8/10 I'll be calling. But it would be ok if they make a liar out of me!
Enjoy the weekend, healing thoughts to all.
0 -
Judy, sorry for the loss of your mentor too. The best ones always become friends, as mine did--we often socialized with his family and he ours. We are both better at our professions because of them; and our lives are all the richer for having known them. Will have to learn to use Zoom over the weekend so I can pay my respects at the shiva.
0 -
Life begins for anyone when that individual refuses to be a victim of any delimiting experience: disease, accident, poverty, family pressure, marriage dilemma, neglect. Whatever the curse, if you will not take it, or accept the role fate seems to offer, you can never become a mental cripple and nothing can hold you back.
David Seabury
0 -
Hmm, another really wet day here. I'm feeling good though still sore at incisions. It is okay. It is a good reminder to behave. Later I'll go out and attempt to find the feral cats to feed them. Going to start back tomorrow I think to visit with my friends in Sandoval. I have missed them. So much to catch up with everywhere along with re-made appts. later on this month for my t month. CT scan to check on nodule ( shrinking last time ) and some thickening of esophagus.
Dh got his truck back day before yesterday and we looked out yesterday only to see another branch had some out of the same tree. Fortunately it missed his newly repaired ( from the first branch ) truck which is no longer parked in that side of the drive-way. Strange deja vue to see almost the same exact picture as several weeks ago. I said to Dh - didn't we just get through living this one.
Anyway, I hope you are all having a good day - not too hot or too wet.
0 -
Sandy and Judy, It's always so hard to lose the ones who had a big role in our lives. May you both be comforted by memories.
0 -
Jackie, what county are you in? IL's case rate and rolling positivity are both rising, but fueled mostly by downstate counties (especially SW Randolph and Metro East, plus SE Gallatin bordering Paducah, KY and NW Jo Daviess bordering Dubuque, IA). Those counties have a high incidence of stupid libertarian mask-deniers, hedonistic young party animals, and crowded indoor unmasked church services complete with singing. The counties also border "hot spot" states, with cross-state-line commuting. Additionally, on June 30, there was an unofficial prom held at a private home in Mahomet in Champaign County, and cases associated with it are still emerging.
0 -
Sandy - if you are attending and not the organizer of a Zoom meeting, it is very easy. Download the app and then the organizer will send you the web address. Click on it, and the organizer will let you in. Your instructions will probably give you a time to join. I've been going to Zoom meetings since Covid began. Not what we want in the time of sorrow, but better than nothing. You are too at risk to go.
DH is in "clickering" between the baseball and basketball games. What a happy camper!
Stay safe everyone.
0