Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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Nice to meet to mavericksmom. Sorry to hear you’ve had a reoccurrence, but glad that you have confidence in your new surgeon.
I wish I could have gone to Woodstock, but unfortunately was too young. I’m a rock fan and love to listen to music. Last concerts that I saw before the pandemic were Journey and Aerosmith in Las Vegas in 2019. We had tickets to see The Who in Las Vegas in 2020, but the pandemic (and breast cancer) cancelled the trip.
Sorry to hear about Bill, Illinois. It’s so difficult when a beloved pet is sick.
It’s been one of those days where the weather report continues to call for thunderstorms starting in the next hour. It’s 6:40pm and it hasn’t rained a drop. It’s gotten darker outside though, so maybe they’re really right this time.
Enjoy your evening.
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Welcome to the forum, Mavericksmom. As you can see, we are all over the place but will be with you on your journey.
The driving issue is tough. Both my parents drove themselves to the license place and got them to renew their licenses - Dad at age 80 and my Mom at 90. Since I always drove when we were together, I hadn't realized how bad Mom was. After several complaints from others in her Independent living facility, they made her take a test. Fortunately, that finally was the end. DH (79 soon) only drives in our neighborhood during the day. If we are going far or at night, I insist on driving. It will be hard to get him to give it up completely. He is convinced that his beloved companion, Mutz, needs to go to a variety of places to have his walks, several of which aren't in walking distance. It gets hot enough here in Phoenix that sidewalks in our immediate neighborhood really aren't safe during the summer either.
Usual quiet weekend for us. Today has been a sports marathon - tennis, golf, baseball and the Cardinals start at 5:00. Tomorrow I have grant proposals to write for the food bank. DD will be 52 tomorrow. We usually go to Maine to celebrate with her but with DH's health issues, we have been afraid to fly. I'm hoping she will come here for Ken's birthday next month instead.
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Welcome, Mavericksmom. Bummer that you're having a third go-round with bc, but a silver(plate) lining is that it's a new primary, rather than mets. Has your DH seen a physiatrist (rehab medicine specialist) or PT for gait training? Maybe modified rocker sole shoes could help with a heel-toe gait so he can walk and strengthen his leg and ankle muscles.
Jackie, so sorry to hear about poor Bill. It's sad when our pets' aging accelerates faster than ours.
I missed Woodstock--I was 18 and living at home (my college was a commuter school) and my parents forbade me to go. But in 1998 Gordy & I attended Day 2 (folk-rock) of "A Day in the Garden" on the site of Yasgur's farm, before it became the Bethel Arts Center. We saw Donovan, Melanie, Ritchie Havens, Lou Reed, Joni Mitchell (who finally sang "Woodstock" 29 years after she wrote it after CSNY described the fest--which she couldn't attend--to her), and Pete Townshend. As the sun was setting, he did "See Me, Feel Me" backed by a choir--the same song with which the Who had greeted the sunrise in 1969. We got to sit in the up-front press section: as a favor to a reporter friend whose news radio station didn't have it in the budget to send him, I did a couple of live remotes. (Had three flip-phone batteries charged up, and they still ran out; the public phone booths on-site were also cellular and battery-operated and went dead mid-feed. CBS finally let me use their satellite link). Day 1 was '70s rock (Henley, Nicks) and Day 3 was contemporary '90s emo, grunge & metal. True to form, those bands' fans threatened to riot when the beer ran dry, fist fights broke out, and the fest ended in midafternoon. (We were already on the plane back home by then).
Got a text from my HK this morning--because she was having sinus issues since Thurs., she tested today: positive. Bob called in a Paxlovid script for her. Fri. was the worst but she turned a corner yesterday. She can't figure out how she caught it, except that on Wed. she went into the supermarket without a mask--but it was only a few minutes. She is double-boosted but a "COVirgin," never having caught it till now, not even when her DH had it in the spring of 2020. Bob & I tested as soon as he called her pharmacy: we're both negative (but will test again in 24 hrs. and a third time if tomorrow we're still negative, which is the protocol for fully-vaxed/boosted but exposed). She drove me to my mani on Thurs., and drove Gordy back to his place later that day--so he'd better test too. He, like her, is double-boosted but never had COVID. (Bob & I have some degree of "hybrid immunity," having had Omicron between our boosters--but there are no absolute guarantees with this bug). Another week of dealing with the kitties by myself. But (knock wood) I'm okay and so is Bob.
We did go to the Air & Water Show after testing. It poured for the first half-hour, and everything was postponed for 90 minutes. They had to cancel the water-rescue demos because the lake was so choppy (BTW, "water rescue" is a sore subject around here, what with recent drownings and horrible boating accidents in the lake), and the Blue Angels were delayed for another half hour before the fog lifted from Gary Airport, which is the aviation staging area. But a good (albeit wet & exhausting) time was had by all.
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SAndy- sounds like a fun concert - Gordy would have still be in high school or junior high in 1998. What a treat for him.
I signed up for one of those password vaults and can't figure out how to use it.
Fortunately it is free. Will see if DH can help after work today.Have a great Monay.
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I now have three things on my to-do list: sew, write, and Anytime Fitness. Walking Tippy does not count, as he reminds me himself. Works wonderfully for taking him on walks while I am on bike. Amazon.com : NEWURBAN - Dog Bike Leash - Easy Installation Removal - Hand Free Dog Bicycle - Exerciser Leash - for Exercising - Training Jogging - Cycling and Outdoor - Safe with Pets. : Pet Supplies I am expecting a bulk shipment of saris today: the anticipation is almost painful. Yesterday I went to AF, got on the bike, and after 30 minutes got shaky and sweaty. I had a bowl of cereal before. Left and went to Kwik-Trip and got some sweets. I made some zucchini bread (with yellow summer squash from my garden) last night so it won't happen again. I also get attacks of acid reflux, probably ought to start my sinus routine again.
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betrayal, I am seeing my PCP today, typed up letter to give to my husband's PCP as they are in the same practice. I just wanted him to be aware of my DH's condition and ask about driving.
I do drive and haven't driven with him since my bout with breast cancer in 2019. He did quite well then, but that was over 3 years ago. He seems ok now, gets wherever he is going, but again, very local. I have no idea how safely he drives and assuming he is competent just because he gets to and from a destination isn't realistic. I should probably have him drive me around the block to see. I am feeling under so much pressure, my job at the middle school begins soon, I am worried about my husband, bills, etc. and now breast cancer! How dare breast cancer rears it's ugly head a third time! I am a planner, list maker, breast cancer wasn't on my list!!! LOL We do what we have to do, that is life!
Music is what gets me through all the things life throws at me. I am not sure what I would do without music! I didn't get to Woodstock, to be honest, I was in high school and such a "goodie-good" the thought of going there wasn't even a desire. I also hate mud! LOL Seriously, I knew some people who went, but my parents were very old fashioned, conservative, and there is no way they would allow me to go there. I never wished I went, but I really enjoyed hearing some of the music from the day. So many great performances!
I did get to see the Beatles when they came to JKF stadium in Phila. (demolished years ago as was the stadium after it) I still have my ticket stub, $5! It was my first concert. Like most of you, I have seen hundreds of concerts over the years. Some of my favorite shows were in quiet little venues, bars, small bands. I like most all music, not a fan of heavy metal or rap. I have no clue about the artists my school kids listen to. They range between grades 6-8. So glad so many here love music!
As I sat at the hair salon, I looked at People Magazine and laughed at most of the celebrity photo's. I never heard of them! When did I get so out of touch? LOL
mcbaker, I seriously need to get another dog when I recoup from this breast cancer! Love your post and the thought of having an exercise pup and companion makes me smile! They do keep us going. But then again, the skunk encounter I had in my own backyard last year while watching my stepson's dog, still makes me cringe!
Hope everyone has a great day!
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Woodstock - I was 10, so it wasn't even on my radar. My partners brother was 18, my partner 13 so not sure his parents would have allowed him to go. He just carries with him the fact he could have been there.
Mavericksmom welcome to the group. Not good to find you hit with BC again! Three times is most certainly not the charm.
Driving - we always feared telling my dad it was time to stop driving. I thought the task would fall to me and I'd end up disowned. But devine intervention, he gave up on his own. He drove himself to a local grocery store and apparently someone stepped out in front of him. His take was “some old SOB stepped out and I could have killed him! I'm done." And he was done. He sold the car for a $1 to a cousin who was on hard times. It was a win win.
Jackie, my heart goes out to you for Bill. Never easy as our beloved pets decline. Sandy, glad you were able to view the air and water show despite the weather. MC you're always busy
It's 79 and overcast. Cool enough to do some cleaning in my house without dying from the heat. Still need to make calls about renting a pod or container to stuff everything in while the bedrooms get painted. The chimney hasn't been looked at yet. Mason was to be here Thursday 4:30; then it was Sunday at 10:30; now it's some time today. I can't get others to show up so I'm rolling with him. He just text, he'll be here in 1/2 an hour. I'll let you know.
Concerts - one left that we've had tickets to for months is Willie Nelson and his Outlaw band. We got to see him last year and enjoyed the show. His sister participated in that one, but she has since passed away. Unsure how much longer he'll tour.
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To bring forth and preserve, to produce without possessing, to act without
hope of reward, and to expand without waste, this is the supreme virtue.
Lao-tzu0 -
Bill passed over to the Rainbow last night. As these things go, I'm full of a longing sadnesss but happy he is not sufferring. Likely there will be someone else here at some point since we rescue.
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We're seeing a double bill of Emmylou Harris and Mary Chapin Carpenter at Ravinia a week from Friday. Bob has the entire 4-day weekend off (so far) and we will leave the house in time to catch an earlier train, since the concert starts at 7, not 8pm. As far as we know there won't be an opening act for them (there wasn't the last time we saw MCC and Arlo Guthrie 10 years ago) so we'd better get there in time for a 6 pm buffet dinner. We have pavilion tickets, so we can bring drinks but not food to our seats. But just in case, we're bringing takeout utensil "setups" and our official Ravinia cups (required for any beverages being carried into the pavilion) just in case we have to resort to the Market Place cafeteria.
Never saw the Beatles (Bob did at Shea Stadium in 1966) but did see McCartney in 1990. Gordy was 5, and fell asleep in my lap during "Golden Slumbers," which was one of the lullabies I used to sing to him. He abruptly awoke during the encore "Live & Let Die" when the fireworks started.
At "A Day in the Garden," Gordy was 13 going on 14 but already growing a small beard. When Townsend was talking between songs, he asked if anyone in the audience was from Chicago, and we raised our hands. He replied, "Are you going to my benefit for Maryville School at Park West tomorrow night?" We shook our heads, and he responded "Why the (expletive) not?" Gordy responded "Because I'm underage and they wouldn't let me in." Pete asked how old and was flabbergasted to hear the answer. "You two tell the bouncer that I said to let you in, because Maryville needs the money." When we got home I called the club to order the tickets and promised I would not let Gordy have anything stronger than a Coke. They said, "sorry, but it's 18+, no exceptions." I asked to speak to a manager, who confirmed that my escorting Gordy would make no difference. So Maryhill lost $1400--though we did make a small donation. (I decided not to take a chance to buy tickets without saying anything, but Park West is notorious for carding everyone, even the middle-aged).
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Oh, Jackie, I am so sorry about Bill. He is at peace--and maybe even happiness at the Bridge--now. Give yourself time to grieve before getting another rescue.
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Jackie: Sorry to hear that Bill has crossed the rainbow bridge. It is hard to lose a loved pet.
We had to make the decision to put our Dalmatian, Lita, down today since she has had a severe cognitive, vision loss, and coordination decline over the last 3 days. I suspected she had lymphoma and the vet confirmed the enlarged lymph nodes were not only on her neck and abdomen but also her back knees. He had seen her a week ago when she went for a pedicure last Tuesday and was surprised by what he saw today. Given that she would have been 14 in November, it was still a tough decision to make but one that she deserved. She had carrots, and a dog ice cream cup before we took her and while there they had a jar of Hershey's Goodbye chocolate kisses. She had never had chocolate until today and she wolfed 2 of them down. It was a peaceful and pain-free passing attended by my DD and DSIL. My DS brought his dog, Boomer down and they had one last loving visit. I will miss her immensely since she was my velcro dog. We leave for vacation tomorrow so that makes this even harder.
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Hugs to both of you, betrayal and Jackie. I don't know what I will do when Tippy leaves me. Give all your animals extra love. The more love you give, the more you have.0 -
betrayal and Jackie, I am so sorry! Here is a poem I found comfort in when my Lucy and Maverick passed.
It came to me that every time I lose a dog
they take a piece of my heart with them.
And every new dog who comes into my life,
gifts me with a piece of their heart.
If I live long enough, all the components
of my heart will be dog and I will become
as generous and loving as they are!
(Anonymous)
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Sending you virtual hugs betrayal and Illinois. Sorry for your loss.
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Thanks to all for your kind words of sympathy, and mavericks mom for the beautiful sentiments of the poem. As rescuers we always think we are prepared and can "hadle" it because we have done it so many times over. We so far have turned out to be wrong about that. Each time we go through a lot of tears and distress while feeling fortunate to have these beautiful friends with us sharing life in the woods.
We keep saying if we rescue again, like we think there is a possibility we won't, we will in fact, look for an older and smaller breed person. Bill was a big guy and we had to call help to get him out to the car this morning. He is being cremated so he will be back soon. Mini is older though still quite energetic, so someone she can romp a bit with would be nice. Someone small enough for us to handle too. In time. We are not in a hurry, but don't want to leave Mini alone too long. She needs to be the alpha now. Betrayal, hugs to you as well. It is a difficult time to go through, but I can't imagine not having the years we had with Bill and all the others as well.
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While I grieve for her I also realize how blessed I was that this little rescue came into my life. She was so traumatized when we got her and it took patience and obedience training to give her the life she deserved. Then she gave us the life we deserved to have had such a faithful, loving dog. We were unsure of her origins but the DogDNA test confirmed she was a Dalmatian, even if on the petite side. Thank you all for your sharing of condolence sentiments. I am bereft.
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Betrayal, hugs to you too for the loss of your dear Lita. 14 is much older than average for that breed, but the grief is the same regardless of age.
Some good news: rapid-antigen test #2, taken 30 hrs after yesterday's, is also negative. I suspect my hay fever symptoms ARE hay fever: not only are mold spore and weed pollen counts high today; but when I walked into Petsmart wearing my mask (after being outdoors first on my deck and then farmers' market) my symptoms disappeared--then when I walked back to my car and stashed my mask, they came back. So I'm hydrating like crazy, cranking the AC (yeah, I'm an eco-criminal) and vowing to be more compliant with snorting Nasalcrom at bedtime and Nasacort twice a day. Eyedrops (Systane & Pataday) too. I may wear a simple cheap surgical mask for each outdoor walk and discard it afterward.
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Oh little honey, I am soooooooo sorry! I know..... I remember taking Lacee to the vets for the last time..... Just breaks your heart. It hurts to just go back home, without her....
I didn't want another dog.... I just couldn't do that again.
Just wanted you to know I am thinking about you.... xoxo Chevy
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Welcome Maverick. Jackie and Betrayal, I'm sorry about your fur babies. We've had to say good-bye way too many times. Next month will be 3 years since we said good-bye to Mischa and we haven't decided to get dog or not. The rescue dogs seem to be quite traumatized and a lot of work but then again so is a puppy. Maybe a rescue puppy. It will be up to DH to decide since he is home during the day.
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Illinois and betrayal, I am so very sorry for your losses. It is devastating for me when one of my animals passes over.
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Jackie & Betrayal - my heart goes out to you both. My Dalmatian passed at 11 years, and I still haven’t gotten another.
Allergies have been crazy and I was worrying about covid. That was until I checked what’s in the air - ragweed. Ragweed is my worst and I still take Claritin D daily, 365 days a year. I’ve tried Zyrtec but without a 24 hour version I kept forgetting to take the second 12 hour pill. No help0 -
Losing a pet is hard but having one is a joy I wouldn't trade for anything. I sent the poem to my DD as she had to put her cat down last week.
We usually get small 10-20 lbs mid-life rescues. Mutz, who we were told was 2 was probably closer to 1 was the exception. The others have been 5-8 when we got them. We had one who had obviously been treated terribly but we also had one who immediately showed us how loved he had been. I always create a back story for them if the rescue doesn't have one. We had young labs when the kids were young but have settled for a dog of a size we can manage and carry if necessary. The second lab caused my mother to fall a couple of times and I had to tell her she couldn't keep him when we were away. We are way too old to start with a puppy. DD trained the last lab 35 years ago.
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I want to add my condolences for the loss of your pups. I cried so much when my tuxedo rescue kitty died that I just about couldn't breathe. Animals add a level of joy to life that is hard to describe.
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Jackie & Betrayal - I too would like to add my sympathy for your losses.
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The only kitty I lost too young was named Mischa (with all sorts of nicknames). He was coal-black. We had just lost Pickles to kidney failure at 18 a couple months earlier and we weren't going to get another cat because of Gordy's & my allergies. But we went to a friend's pre-Thanksgiving brunch--he led us into the sunroom and there on a big rocking chair was a tiny ball of black fur the size of.a fist--barely 4 weeks old. He'd found him in his basement, the sole survivor of.a litter rejected by its mom (herself still a kitten), and hand-fed it kitten formula from a doll bottle. Bob looked at it and said "I don't want 'a' cat, I want that cat!" Our friend tried to keep it, but his (then) girlfriend was so allergic her eyes swelled shut--so we adopted him (by then definitely a "he") at 7 weeks old. When we took him for his first vet visit and neutering, we got the bad news that he ELISA-tested FIV (feline AIDS virus) positive, probably from its mom. We were told to love him for as long as we could but not to expect him to live more than 3 or 4 years, and to get him Western-Blot tested at 6 months. At 6 months we got the good news that he had seroconverted to negative. He seemed energetic & robust (quite robust), but easily overstimulated to the point where he would nip if petted too much. The vet suggested he needed a buddy, so we adopted Matthew, a gorgeous 2-yr-old gray/white patch tabby...who proceeded to torment poor Mischa and pee on walls to boot. At just a week shy of his 8th birthday, he leapt up to the sofa but his heart stopped before he landed. He had cardiomyopathy. (His tormentor stood by the sofa and keened for an hour, then prowled the house for days looking for him). All 3 of my other dear departed cats died of ailments of old age--one at 16, Pickles at 18 and Matthew at nearly 20.
Speaking of allergy symptoms, the absolute worst I can recall during my adulthood was the summer we moved here from Seattle. I had several years of allergy shots (ragweed & trees) in Brooklyn, but there was no ragweed in Seattle and I wasn't allergic to any trees, molds or weeds growing there. Got a very rude awakening in summer 1978--Chicago has ragweed, grasses & mold allergens galore. I was certain I had s 3-week cold, or 3 different colds in a row, so raw was my throat and so stuffy & runny my nose I had to mouth-breathe, with chain-sneezing to boot. Nope--allergy tests delivered the bad news. (I had yet to adopt a cst, so I wasn't tested for dander). Back then there were no non-drowsy antihistamines, and i didn't yet have high blood pressure so I could still take decongestants. My FP put me on a rotating schedule of four prescription antihistamines to prevent my developing resistance to any of them. And I had 6 years of weekly shots. As bad as this season is, my symptoms are nothing compared to back then: now there are OTC non-drowsy sntihistamines, OTC mast cell inhibitor (Nasalcrom) & topical steroid (Nasacort, Rhinocort, Flonase) sprays, better saline sprays (Ayr) and even nasal-flush bottles to make up for not being able to take Sudafed or Afrin. Alas, albuterol inhalers are still Rx-only and expensive--but "easing the sneeze" prevents the "wheeze."
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Jackie and Betrayl ,
Please accept my condolences. They give us their heart and take a bit of ours with them.
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Bob just got home & tested negative again. We're on the fence about testing a third time late tomorrow night or early Wed. morning--he has no symptoms at all now. Meanwhile, Happy has been in my face (literally, standing on my chest smashing his neck against my face) half the time I'm home (Heidi takes over at bedtime). He will not let me brush him enough to keep the shedding at bay--when he sees me remove the hairs from the bristles or lint-roller myself, he sees it as an affront and a rejection of his "gifts." He looks at me with those big, sad, hurt hazel eyes and I feel like a contrite ax-murderer. I just went through half a bottle of Systane flushing his hairs out of my eyes.
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So very sorry, Jackie. It is so hard.
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Dear Betrayal and Illinoislady and anyone else who is grieving over the loss of a beloved pet, I'm sending you a warm hug.
I lost my collie boy, Chance, in 2020 and I still miss him. He was my heart dog, the dog I had wanted all my life. He came to us at 8 years old through a rescue in Virginia. Just 6 months after we got him I found out I had BC, stage 2, lobular. He helped me get through surgery, chemo, and radiation. He seemed to know when I needed him and would bring me a toy, do his silly play bow, nudge me to take him for a walk, or just lay his long snout on my lap. I was convinced that my deceased Dad, who also loved collies, had sent Chance to me knowing I was going to need him.
I know you're still hurting. I hope the beautiful poem sent by Mavericksmom can bring you some comfort.
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