Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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Waving Hello to everyone. I've been reading but not commenting too much. I've had a lot of ordinary days, cleaning and shredding in my office and cooking more than usual ( taking meal to new mom at church, baking for a few events). I do think I've cooked more since moving south than I ever did when we lived in DC! I don't generally mind, as I like to cook.
Pies were my contribution to family dinner today, and brownies for the littles. I hope everyone had a good day and has a good weekend ahead.
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How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these.
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We had a good family meal yesterday. DS makes the turkey and stuffing while DDIL makes amazing mashed potatoes. Her mother brought string bean casserole and pumpkin pie (from Costco, yum). I brought the pineapple casserole and the candied sweets (made from scratch) and they were a hit. I also made up a platter of assorted cheeses, dried apricots and dates, fig jam on the Brie (delicious), and almonds. I had multigrain crackers, and DDIL added club crackers. It was good. I also get delegated the chore of making gravy and I now know not to try to make it in the electric roaster because it would not thicken. Once we put it in a regular saucepan on the stove, it thickened quickly.
It was nice that both sided of DS and DDIL's family could get together. We enjoy her parents and being an only child, that's all the family she has. My DD and DSIL also came and they brought the wine and an apple pie.
Today I have lots of errands to run. I made an appointment to get my tDap updated because it expired in August. I have to pay for the luminarias that we purchased to take part in the annual Christmas ritual in our neighborhood. Two women organize the purchase of plumber's candles and white paper bags and a local landscaper donates the sand for the bags. The majority of the neighbors line the street and sometimes their driveways on Christmas eve at dusk. we usually take a ride around the neighborhood to see them lit. It is such a pretty tradition.
Lastly, is a run to the pulmonologist office to pick up a different mask to try. The one they gave me to wear is doing a job on the bridge of my nose. It remains reddened for the entire day and gets worse each day. Plus it makes my nose tender. I tried a band-aid as she suggested, but the adhesive is doing damage to my face. I guess we'll figure out a plan on Tuesday when I see her.
cindyny, I imagine your blood sugar might be a bit elevated after all those carbs yesterday, but should return to normal soon.
canarycat, glad everything turned out to be good for you.
reader425, lovely baked goods. Were they blonde brownies? I love them and had a friend in high school who made them the best. I have never been able to duplicate her efforts.
Chris, poor Tippy having arthritis. I like the "buttons" story. I am sure your cold weather gets to his bones as well. I know the cold gets to mine.
intolight, I second Chris with "you have paid your dues". I find that as I age, my mental energy exceeds my physical energy and after all the cooking I did yesterday morning, I didn't offer to help with the cleanup after dinner. I usually do, but my back was kicking up, so I sat. Normally, I offer to wash dishes.
I do hope everyone had a peaceful and enjoyable Thanksgiving. Today is bitterly cold, barely above freezing, but sunny. There is a good breeze so I am sure the cold will be penetrating. I hope everyone has a great day and waving "hi" to everyone.
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hi friends. I (60f) guess I’m not “official” yet, but after several false alarms, biopsies, diagnostic ultrasounds where I was waved away …
this time, I got the “sad voice/head tilt” you have a concerning mass conversation with the radiologist.
My referring primary gave me the name of a good breast surgeon “just in case” wink wink when I asked for the referral and she examined me.
BIRADS 4c - 3cm, rim enhancing, homogenous solid mass, with irregular margins, growing against the grain of the breast. If showed up out of nowhere.But I work as a nurse, in endoscopy - I know what the head tilt/sad voice/anxious caregivers means. Sometimes you biopsy on the off chance it could be cancer. Sometimes you biopsy because you know it’s cancer and you just need the info to begin treatment. They are completely different conversations.
So I’m waiting for the initial biopsy results and I’m glad to have found the other old women to hang out with.
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Welcome martccrn. We are here to offer any assistance, advice and ((hugs)) you may need as you go through both dx and tx. I am glad you found us and reached out. Please come back to keep us abreast of what's happening. This is a nice place to land.
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martccrn, I am with you on all the false alarms. Mine were all with one side. Began with lumpy at the age of 18.
Reader, I should be writing, but I constantly find myself roaming on the 'net. Is there any cure?
Betrayal, bitter cold, barely above freezing? It is now 28. Sunday's low will be 2, Wednesday's will be -1. Five inches of snow expected tomorrow. Enjoy!
My silverish coat with a hood is permanently dingy. My blue coat is bad after sundown, and doesn't have a hood. I bought a matching hood for it, and realized that our wintertime bedtime potty walks are very brief and do not cross any streets, so the silver is retired.
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We are booking PR for next week. To save $500 or more we’ll be flying out of Fort Lauderdale - an hour and a half from home.
In addition to $ savings, Fort Myers has no direct flights either, we’d need to fly way north and add 4-8 hours on to a short trip.
Hotels charging up to 22% for resort fees, some hotels are next to the airport to boot, or landlocked near the major highway.
SO trying to work deals on points etc… I’m done, just book something on the beach.
Martyccrn, sorry you had to join the group. We chatter on just about everything under the sun. Ask away and one of us may know the answers. Some of these ladies were nurses too.
Reader, the desserts looked great.
Betrayal, the luminaries sound great. Post a picture once they’re up if you can.
Chris, it sounds very cold where you are! Keep warm.
Bloodwork was easy, the tech was very good. I ate my Cliff bar and sipped my seltzer as I left. No results yet. It was 53 and felt 43 this morning as I left.I’m heading back outside to get some sun and read my book. Enjoy your day ladies!
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I'm sorry about the Tippy story. I gave you too long of a leadup to the punchline. Last winter, he had the zoomies after a bath, and rolled around on the carpet where a sewing needle pierced him, probably in the belly. He passed it in a BM the other day. It wasn't arthritis after all!! Yes, poor Tippy. He is so much happier.
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Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world. For, indeed, that's all who ever have.
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Black Friday……
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teka I love your piggy bank photo. Says it all. I bought myself a new vanity for my powder room. So my piggy is looking mightily scrawny too.
I hope everyone had a good thanksgiving. Ours was in October as we celebrate the harvest. My sisters birthday is Nov 21 so I get really into the holiday spirit after that. Still needing something for mom. She’s impossible to shop for. Doesn’t ever like any clothes we get her. So I’m hoping for something in small appliance realm that she will like. I started putting put my Xmas stuff yw and Dusty is posing like one. Welcome to the group Marticcrn I’m also a nurse there’s a bunch of us in this group. I retired from teaching in 2018 but have always worked in the community or acute care my areas are ER and mental health and addictions Im currently working parttime in a harm reduction clinic.
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The day flew by. I slept in later than normal - I was shortchanged the night before, 7+ vs 5. SO slept in way beyond me. I had laundry done, and the robot vacuumed everything except our bedroom, because he was still in it.
I took a gf crockpot back to her house; she’s still in Illinois. I had used it on Thanksgiving, put it in the dishwasher so it was nice and clean. It was taking up space on my counter. They’re big and bulky, so ours is stored in the garage.
We called Norton, computer security, to do a tune up on SO’s laptop. I still need to buy a SSD drive, before they can do my laptop. I was told by them my HDD is full. My computer skills are limited, so I may buy an external SSD and put all my photos on it - basically empty file storage on to it. Maybe a cyber Monday sale will help me out. I barely use it, but I do our taxes on it so by February I’ll want to use it. SO’s is running super fast now, he’s quite pleased. Total for calls, being transferred etc, was 55 minutes.
Tomorrow we’ll pack for PR. I’ve started a list, and will buy whatever we forget to take. I’m hoping it’s super relaxing. I looked up the Don Q rum tasting in old San Juan, and it’s closed. But we can take the ferry over to Barcardi, and enjoy the ride. I did see online Casa Barcardi now charges for the tours ($40), they’ve added a rum tastings ($80) and even a self pour to make your own bottle ($198) - all to increase their profits, which was inevitable.
Bloodwork results were in very early this morning. Everything is good. Cholesterol 184, but the PA notes say my LDL was high. This is my normal, a low hdl offsets my higher ldl; some ratio thing. She wants it retaken around 2/28, and include a urine. I laughed - test my A1c after Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years - that should be interesting. (wire my jaw shut lol)
That’s my story. High today was 79 but didn’t feel hot. There was a breeze, rolling clouds moving through. I sat for a bit reading in my driveway, letting the sun light up the page.
Hope you all have a good weekend.
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Martyccrn - Glad you found us. "Age is just a number." It's my understanding that this group started mainly because we weren't raising children and were looking forward to or already retired. Anyway, we do chatter about a lot of things but will try to answer any questions you have on this journey. Fingers crossed that yours will be a false alarm. Waiting is one of the hardest times.
We had a nice Thanksgiving Day. I played golf in the morning and then we had dinner at a friend's home. We took a family corn casserole and pecan pie. Had leftovers last night. Beautiful weekend - morning lows in the early '50 and days in the '70's. I played golf again this morning. Ken just turned on the Northwestern/Illinois game and it reminded me why we suffer through the summers.
Low-keyed weekend for us. I've been researching Mom's family line but plan to switch to Dad's in 2026 so doing some last minute clean-up. Also looking for pictures to add to our StoryWorth account.
Hoping your football team wins. I've about given up on mine!
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Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate and to humble.
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We arrived home about 3:30 yesterday afternoon. Traffic was probably the worst I've ever experienced but we had no close "encounters" threatening death. A few miles short of the tunnel in Mobile, AL, traffic came to a standstill and we inched forward for about 30 minutes. There had been an accident. At another point in the journey, traffic stopped again. I forget where.
Our visit was pleasant. We are treated well by dh's nephew and wife. We have our own guest quarters, bedroom and bath. Their home is modern and new. You step from the open concept living area out onto the pool pavement. Their living room furniture is a large sectional facing the fireplace with a huge tv over the fireplace. DH and I find the sectional very uncomfortable seating. We're happy to get home to our Yours and Mine chairs. LOL.
The meal was delicious, catered by Whole Foods. Traditional dishes. Now on to Christmas. We stay at home and drive a short distance to my younger sister's house for a meal with a small gathering. Not everyone in her family will be present. When my mother died, our whole-family gatherings ceased, as expected. She was the reason everyone made the effort.
The weather in the Jacksonville area of Florida was cool for Thanksgiving but mainly sunny. No dipping in the pool or sitting in the hot tub. Here at home we may get some rain today and the cool temperatures will continue into next week.
Hope everyone enjoyed the Thanksgiving holiday season in one way or another. Now on to the pre-Christmas season.
Welcome to any newcomers. I caught up on posts but didn't take notes.
Happy Sunday.
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carole, glad you made it home safely and that you had an enjoyable time with your DH's nephew and wife. We have a Whole Foods near us, but I find them to be expensive and am not overly fond about their takeout platters. We do like their desserts, but they tend to be overpriced. We have not tried their Thanksgiving meal though.
Taco1946, had to look up StoryWorth to see what it is about. Sounds intriguing but I am not sure I could answer all the questions to complete a story about anyone but myself. I'm glad you have been able to do your mother's line though.
The weather here is so gray, it is depressing. It is 40 degrees so the snow shower we had this morning did not last. It was followed by rain, too. The storm in the midwest area is working its way towards us and is expected to be a problem on Tuesday. I m not prepared for the gloom of winter yet.
I have a mammo appointment tomorrow and my pulmonary appointment on Tuesday. I am hoping we do not get the predicted snow, because I will have to cancel the appointment. I have a 2 PM appointment, so if we get snow it would not be advisable to drive there nor back. We live on a hill and the driveway is a problem when it snows. I don't care to try to drive on the driveway (near impossible due to pitch) nor hike up it in snow. With osteopenia, I don't need a hip fx.
I decluttered one section of my closet yesterday and rearranged 2 other areas. One still needs further evaluation, but not now. Today, I want to sort through what used to be work blouses that could use some culling. I want to keep those that either have a blazer or a cardigan that corresponds to it. There are some that can go because of the brand as well. I'll keep the better brand ones that have a corresponding jacket or sweater, but even try to narrow that down as well.
I am trying to eat a mango and hate how difficult it is to get the meat off the stone. Love them, but not how difficult they are to eat.
Hope everyone has a great day and waving "hi" to everyone.
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You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'
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Betrayal, it's gray here this morning, too. We have a chance of rain during the day. I have no plans for today except to go to the gym for exercise. I will probably attend the senior class at 11:30. I have been too inactive for a number of days because of Thanksgiving travel and the holiday itself. I can tell that my weight is up because my wedding ring fits so tightly that I can't slide it past my knuckle. Fluid retention.
It's good to be home, sipping coffee and reading on my laptop. After I scroll though the news, I'll do Wordle and start on Spelling Bee. Hope everyone else is enjoying a morning routine.
I
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ok friends - pathology is back and I’m officially in the club we never wanted to join. Triple negative invasive ductal carcinoma. Waiting to hear from the nurse navigator.
i left work because … it’s kind of a lot to take in and still do the “no cancer dance” for my colonoscopy patients, lol.
chatgpt says 24 big weeks of chemo. Is this your experience? Also, I turn 60 this month!! Woohoo!5 -
Sorry to read the news that you will be staying around here. You deserve to take the day off.
My onco doc said that hormone negative BC is very responsive to chemo. I didn't have that much chemo, but I did have a year of Herceptin.
Done writing for a while.
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@marticcrn Sorry to read of your dx. We are here for you so let us know if we can help.
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marticcrn, sorry to read about your news. I hope once you have a plan in place, we can offer comfort, support and assistance. The nurse navigator should be able to assist you with getting the appointments you need for follow-up. ((HUGS))
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Horrible day because it was my annual mammogram and it was a real shit show again. I had mammogram and then 3 spot films of area where they performed stereotactic bx last year. Then radiologist decides I need an ultrasound. So there was an inordinate amount of waiting even though initial access was the fastest ever. The rooms are very cold, so the techs have to supply warmed blankets which unfortunately don't stay warm for long. By the time they finally came to get me to escort me to the ultrasound, I needed blanket 3. She said her room was warmer, but she wasn't truthful. I arrived before at 1:40 and never got out of there until 3:30. Thank goodness, they do provide free parking though you have to go through getting it validated by office staff who had left by the time I was ready to leave. So I had to go over to the adjoining building's MRI desk to get it validated. Left with letter saying I need another dx mammogram in 6 months. That will push me into my 10 year anniversary year of being diagnosed. I have to reach out to MO to get her to order dx mammogram, so I sent her an email via the portal. I won't see her until January, but would like to order now so I can get an appointment. We had a major hospital chain (4 hospitals) go belly up in the past 6 months, so their thousands of patients are scrambling to not only find physicians, but also to get appointments.
Then I went online to the portal of my other hospital system to get a copy of my Dexascan report. I could not access the portal, was told I needed to change my password and every attempt at that took over an hour and I got nowhere. I called tech support and he said he was sending me a link via email, but it never came and he tried several times.
I just paused to check my inbox and his link never came through but I did get a valid code to sign in, changed my password and sent an email to my GI doc who I have been trying to get an appointment with in 2026 since May of 2025. They keep telling me she has no openings in her schedule, and they will contact me when she does. So seven months later, I am still in limbo with her instructions to see her in a year. So rant over now,
It was a sunny, but very cold day with temps barely over freezing. I ran to Staples after my mammogram to buy replacement pages for my desk organizer. I do put appointments in my phone, but find it easier to keep track in my book where I can look at a whole month, and then leaf through for other conflicts. They were shorthanded and I was in line with a purchase wedged in between others shipping packages. He did ask and finally got someone up to run the register. I normally don't like self-checkout, but might have welcomed it today. So all my appointments for next year, dates of planned trips, etc have been duly entered.
My appointment for Pulmonology was canceled this morning and rescheduled for Thursday afternoon. We are expected to get that snow storm that has been sweeping in from the midwest starting tomorrow morning. I am reluctant to trust that I could get there and back if we get any coverage. Our driveway is very steep, faces north and ices easily. I don't dare hike up or down now for a fear of a fall with my osteopenic hips. Better safe than sorry. This way she will have a weeks worth of data to analyze as well.
intolight, I loved Colorado Springs in the summer, but don't think I would like it in the winter. Felt the same about Jackson Hole, but did brave a January trip there to see the Elk preserve. Felt like an icicle the entire time and like an onion, I had multiple layers. I felt like the Michelin man in all the layers and doubted I could have righted myself if I fell.
carole, sorry about the fluid retention post -Thanksgiving feast. There is so much salt in prepared foods today and sugar, too. DD brought a lattice topped apple pie that the bakery added sugar to the top crust. It was so sweet, I could not eat it and peeled if off. DSIL offered to get rid of it for me, meaning he was going to eat it and he did.
cindyny, glad blood work was good. Are you pre-diabetic? Was wondering about the A1C's.
Guess that's about it for today. My feet feel like blocks of ice and I am cold in spite of having a fleece 1/4 zip top on. I'll add another layer and look for my warm slippers.
Hope everyone had a better day than me. Waving "hi" to everyone.
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marticcrn,
I am also sorry to read of your DX.
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January 2010 at age 60 after annual mammogram, follow-up ultrasound and biopsy was diagnosed with TNBC.
I had a lumpectomy with a biopsy of 2 sentinel lymph nodes.
Also, chemo port surgery.
Adriamycin chemo, Cytoxan chemo, and Taxol chemo with Avastin
I was in an Avastin Clinical Trial.
Also, radiation treatments.
My last TNBC treatment was during March 2011.
August 2025 at age 76 annual follow-up visit at Cancer Center. No Evidence Disease…(NED)
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I always took husband with me to a doctor appointment. I would always ask husband on the way home……what did the doctor say?
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@betrayal So sorry about your crappy day. What a horrible experience. I forget where you live, but four hospitals? Ouch! All of my drs except for my pulmonologist and dermatologist are in the same system. They have four hospitals in the Springs and more in Denver, with labs and dr offices scattered all over. If they ever go bust we are in big trouble. Even my DD works for UCHealth although at Children's Hospital branch which is physically connected.
Very cold today with 2" snow on the ground and more expected Wed night.
Got a message from MO office wanting to schedule a PET scan since my TMs are still rising even though CT scan was good. Feels like hide and seek!
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intolight, it was one major hospital system with 4 physical sites, one of which was the only trauma center in the county. So we are down to 2 ER's for the entire large county. Nearest trauma center now is near Philadelphia, in Philadelphia or in West Chester, none of them easily accessible.
The remaining hospitals, 2, are part of a 2 separate hospital systems (one small and the other larger, but scattered acrossed 3 counties) and they have been overwhelmed by the deluge of patients seeking new physicians, physicians scrambling for new places to throw their hats, and not enough physician practices/office space to provide coverage. It is a nightmare caused by corporate greed. Hospital system from CA bought hospitals, ran them into the ground, sold the land under them and forced them to lease it back at exorbitant rates, and then declared bankruptcy once they bled them dry.
Two of the hospitals had been in existence for over 100 years, but had been rebuilt over the years. One was where I used to take my nursing students for clinical experience and it was the first one they abruptly closed. I took students there for over 24 years starting when it was a stand alone hospital, and before it was bought by the chain. It went downhill once it was brought into the chain because they kept taking its revenue to use elsewhere. Only 4 hospitals in the county provided maternity services and they closed two of them. It is horrible what they are doing to healthcare.
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Wow… so far I feel fortunate. There are two large hospitals in the UC system that I visit regularly, and the other two are smaller but fine. The older one is known in the city as the best cancer center here (unless you want to travel to Denver) and is where I attend my oncologist's office. It was bought by the UC Health system and is the oldest in the city. The other one is newer but also has a cancer center, a good infusion center and both have scans, etc. I live about midway between the two , about a 30 minute drive, so I go to the one where I can get the best appointment. Sometimes the nurses, PAs, etc., float between the hospitals. There are three other large hospitals in different systems within the City too. Colorado Springs is growing rapidly and like everywhere else, finding medical doctors is tough. We moved here four years ago. I found my oncologist because I got sick as soon as we moved, went to an urgent care and the doctor there referred me realizing I was already into six years of being mbc. It got me in quicker. I took the first oncologist who accepted me in two weeks thinking I could always change, but I am happy with her.
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Marti, welcome to the sorority nobody wants to pledge. We're "in your pocket" for all visits & procedures you have coming up. TN, unlike Luminal A (and other ER+ cancers), is highly unlikely to return once you've achieved "NED" status ("no evidence of disease," which is the term that has replaced "remission"). By 3-5 years after then without a recurrence, some MOs consider it to have been "cured." It's a rough ride ahead (sometimes you might feel like you've been "rode hard & put up wet") but the payoff is worth it.
We went to the Palm for T-Day dinner—there were 9 of us. Finally finished the leftovers today.
We're getting 3" of snow on top of the 10" we got over the weekend. They're predicting subzero wind chills beginning tomorrow, and by Friday subzero air temps. We discovered that the idiot contractors discarded the A/C covers, failed to weatherize the windows after drywalling & painting, and may have inadequately insulated the walls as well. Consequently, it's brutally cold inside the house. (The thermostat reads 72-74 and the radiators are warm, but the freestanding thermometers never read higher than 68). We're getting weatherstripping and plastic window-shrink-wrap this week, and not a moment too soon. Sitting here with PJs under a sweatshirt under a hooded plush "Snuggie."
Have my semiannual full-body skin check Wednesday with my derm—and wouldn't you know it, I just sprouted a zit on my chin. (My second adolescence at nearly 75)? Wish Clinique still made that old "blemish stick" (tea tree oil and witch hazel in a sponge-tipped tube). Thursday is my mani—and starting Friday, rehearsals every day through Dec. 14 (off again till Jan. 2). Now that we're back here in Edgewater I can take the "L" (CTA train) downtown to avoid paying $20+ with Spot Hero and wrestling with traffic (especially on snowy/icy roads). But the walks to & from the stations, and waiting on the frigid outdoor platform are, uh, "character-building."
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Marti, welcome to our group and best of luck in the months to follow that you get good medical advice and excellent results. My first year ordeal started in 2009 and I'm a surviver.
Betrayal, what an awful day you had, made worse by cold weather misery.
Sandy, stay safe and as comfortable as possible.
I have a dentist appointment today for a cleaning. I don't look forward to the experience or the expense. We are out of pocket with all dental expenses. DH is having a problem with the roof of his mouth being so sore that he can't wear his partial. He has an appointment today with some specialist dentist.
We're experiencing Louisiana winter weather but, thankfully, no snow and ice. It's low 40's outside, dreary and windy. DH is skipping golf and it has to be unpleasant for him to make that decision.
Hi to everyone. Hope you enjoy your day.
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What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you.
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