Australian Sisters
Comments
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Marie if you PM me your face book name I will friend you and add you to our group. I have set it up so it is a private group and only those in the group can see what is written.
Please don't leave the forum as I know in the coming months you are going to need all the support you can get and here is the perfect place to get it.
Jenn the first year is always the hardest and the memories that flood in make us fear all over again. Just know that each anniversary after this will be a celebration of enjoying life to the full.
To all you girls, I'm so glad I've gotten to know you! Even though I've only had one face to face with Sue I still feel that you have all sat in my kitchen sharing a cuppa with me. I would recognize you anywhere! I have lived the support and understanding that comes with sharing the same journey and I know in future ambling that my path will take you will always be around to support me.........now that to me is priceless!!
I'm really getting excited for next week it is already affecting my sleep.......lol.......yes, I'm like a big kid on the count down for Christmas .......I'm needing to take a pill to get me to sleep or I lay here with all sorts of things running through my head.......lol. Just a few more days!!!!! Yoppeeeeee!!!!!
Have a great weekend all!!
Love n hugs. Chrissy0 -
Marie, if you really want to leave this forum you can PM the Mods and request that they remove you from the members list. In doing that, all that you have written will also be removed. I sure hope you change your mind.
Love n hugs. Chrissy0 -
hi everyone
went to see my surgeon the other day. he is very pleased with how my scars are healing. have to have my thyriod ultrasound just to make sure there arent any problems with that. the genetic testing results should be in early next years and then we should know what is the best to do into the future. we did talk about reconstruction and he suggested the lat dorsi method would be the best for me.
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Hello ladies, what a week. who needs to go to gym when you have sheep to chase around. spent the week shearing, getting cattle off to sale and works as well as sheep, what a night mare,the morning they supposed to be off to sale they decided to jump fence into the neighbours paddock, flaming heck, the two students had heaps of exersise that morning, so did i, but i am not very fast and they were abit intimidated by the bulls, and one of the bulls was getting agitated, so we left him and tagged the others and they went to sale and we caught the other pain in arse one and he went else where. then we sfted all the gear out on friday and finished at 10.30 last night and i was exhausted. me old bones felt like they were splitting in half and my feet ached. the lease had expired from that place today. so i have had a full week and going to sleep in tomorrow. hopefully nobody rings us tomorrow morning like he did this morning wanting money, it is pay day, falls on a sat this month. lol don't think i will need to count sheep tonight. Dam things, well the cows were the pain this time, sheep behaved.
Trish i am sorry about your problem, hope its polyps like chrissy said. think of you.
Marie, i think it was you who asked me about NZ. sorry i did not get back to you, no i have not always lived in palmerston North, i was a Whangarei girl, north of north island, Bay of island area, not quite there, about hour and a half. I am sorry you wanting to leave this site, i wish you would reconsider, you would get all the support from these wonderful ladies and be missed. take care girls.
OH Jen, never got back you either, yes we had a similar outcome with our old heads, ecept this week mine got knocked witha concrete weight that controls the bridge the sheep walk down to the truck to go away and it makes it go to different heights and i was standing under it and the student let the bridge down and the weight went right down on my head, OW it hurt. still sore where it hit me and on my headache side too. gee i cant win. lol night night
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Have taken a VERY deep breath and realised that meltdowns are no fun but strangely liberating ! lol . I am sorry for the hasty retreat from this group . You all have been very helpful and I do enjoy getting to know you all . I hope for your understanding as we continue on our journey together ! Part of the enormous challenge for me is I was already suffering from PTSD from the Grantham disaster (If I could share my story with you ,you would understand but you have to read the book ) and so like most people being diagnosed with Cancer was another huge shock and it is very confusing for me . Being swept off your solid foundations and being tossed around in 82 kms of rushing water is so similiar to cancer it is not funny . I have people calling me making appointments for me looking out for me and I am still in shock ! It is nice to know I am not alone but it still takes time . I have enormous faith in my rescuers again like as in Grantham but it is still confusing . I am 58 years old I have many life experiences as well as a nursing career of over 35 years ,that does not give me all the answers but it helps as I search for them .Thanks for your support and I love reading your stories . Remember everybody has a story and we just need to make life more interesting by hearing them ! Have a awesome day waving from Gorgeous Gatton !
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Hi all
Gosh you have been busy. I had pages to read. I was away at a conference up at Waitangi ( for those who know the area, a very beautiful part of this country). Conference was great and so stimulating it has taken time to digest it all - it was on the history of the church in NZ which I know for some would not be exciting but for an historian it was delghtful fare. So much new material and a hugh shift in thinking about colonial history so much more positive than it has ever been and very much more realistic. Several Aussies there presenting because of our shared heritage.
Van, pleased yuo are going to stick around. You will see some of us just can't leave especially now we have made some very good friends who really understand what we are saying.
Kate sorry to be a spoil sport but my radiation problems have not gone away even after all this time. Was told originally that things would settle within a couple of years and when I challenged my Onc about this he admitted that for some people if it hasn't settled by that time it probably never will. It all part of our new reality. These days I just accept it and feel that I can deal; with such problems because I would rather be alive.
Trish as the others have said take a deep breath and get it checked out. Will be waiting to hear the results
Finished putting up most of the Christmas decoration yesterday (with the help of the littlies who stayed over night DGD was a great help this year but DGS had a wonderful time taking the decoration off the tree). - we had visitors last night so wanted most of it done for then. Still have some lights to putr up but they can wait for a couple of days. Managed to have a BBQ outside which was great, only having to come in for coffee and dessert.
Hope you are all having a great weekend.
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LOL Alyson, guess I will just have to get used to my lopsided boobs. I must say the affected breast looks better than the 'normal' one as it is swollen and therefore perkier than the other one which has drooped a bit. Still they are both way nicer than the original model
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Hi girls.....I hope everyone had an enjoyable weekend
I'm feeling a bit down & irritable........a bit snappy at poor old hubby too!!
I think the reality of starting chemo again on Thursday is starting to hit me & I can't help thinking I'll never feel this well again......the onc said I would most likely be on it for 'the rest of my life' with a few breaks here & there
No point moaning about it I know.....but I think I just wanted to get if off my chest!!
And what better place than here to do that...LOL
Karen x0 -
Karen I understand your feelings even though I'm not triple neg.....that prospect of never ending treatment is one every stage IV has to face and it is like looking at the highest wall and wondering how you are going to scale it. (((((((Hugs))))))) grump as often as you need or want and know that we have got your back.
Love n hugs. Chrissy0 -
Karen, you are right, that's a pretty crap thing to have to face... Do you have any fun plans for some stuff between now and Thursday? I know I'd be tempted to get away for a few days or something...
hugs from Jenn0 -
Thanks Jenn...I have coffee with a friend in the morning, coffee with another friend tomorrow arvo, then the onc on Tuesday
... I'm doing the Look Good Feel Better program on Wednesday morning followed by lunch with my sister. Quite looking forward to that, I didn't do it the first time I had chemo...
So, I'm keeping pretty busy but getting very emotional......I'm sure it'll pass & I'll soldier on as we all do.....:)
Thanks for listening!!
Karen x0 -
I am so sorry to hear that Karen. I can feel your despair, I just wish there was something I could say or do to make it better. Just hoping for a cure for this awful disease, you would think that all the money that goes into research that a cure can't be too far away. Hang in there and know that we are all thinking of you.
Hugs Lola.
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Karen, I really hear you.
I just had 3 weeks of chemo, maximum dose and felt bad for the whole month, but oncologist reduced the dose just slightly, changed my pain meds and I have had a great week, feel almost normal, just very fatigued. At the start I just so desperately wanted my old life back, to be able to walk, swim, drink, eat and be active with my family, and so pissed off that I will probably never have that again. This week I'm glad to be happy and able to join in with most activities. Next week who knows... I guess our emotions will continue to fluctuate. I am pleased to have you to chat with, and I will be thinking of you this week.
Love Angela0 -
Thanks Lola & Angela.......I don't normally complain but really needed to get it off my chest...
Started talking to hubby & I got emotional......
Yes Angela, nice to have each other to chat to as we're in the same boat & I can't help feeling it's the beginning of the end..........sorry!
I know I'll have my good weeks & bad weeks but also know I'll never feel this good again.....unless like Lola says, they find a cure for this horrible disease before its too late for us....
So Angela, is this your first round of chemo since being diagnosed with mets? You've probably told me this before but I'm a bit all over the place at the moment....LOL
I feel a bit like a child that needs comforting!!
Karn x0 -
Sorry Angela....just read your history & see you've had chemo for triple neg mets before.....which is promising coz you're still here after nearly 4 years xxxx
Karen x0 -
Hi Karen
My first recurrence was early last year, at the 2 year mark. I was stage 3 before that but was always high risk, lots of nodes from the start and aggressive grade 3 (this site doesn't allow for much elaboration on diagnosis, so sorry if I misled you. I'll try to fix that on my signature).
Xeloda was used to calm down a few active inaccessible nodes, but we found a tumour in my brachial plexus (soft tissue under the collarbone) in May this year. Had more surgery and heaps of radiation. Scans in Sept showed more active inaccessible nodes so started on Abraxane one month ago. Hence the new eyebrows!
Sometimes I feel like I'm somewhere between stages 3 and 4 because it still has not shown up in any vital organs. My mets have been soft tissue. I like to say to people that it can't kill me from where it is, but I have talked honestly with my oncologist, and there is very little doubt it will turn up somewhere, and probably fairly soon. So the question is when, and whether we can slow it down for a bit.
One of the USA ladies here talks about "the other shoe dropping". I feel like that. I am not trying to wish my life away, but I have psychologically moved my thinking to Stage IV. I need to enjoy my life now, and not spend it worrying about that other shoe. When it falls I'll deal with it. There seem to be many ladies here who have dealt with mets in various places over a number of years. I take great strength from them.
So that's my story. I have another dose tomorrow morning and will have an imaginary chat with you then.
Let me know how you get on.
Cheers
Angela0 -
News flash ! Cancer sucks big time ! We grow up with such high expectations of what we want to achieve in our lives and we are encouraged to do that along the way ,then we get cancer and even though there has been huge advances in the diagnosis and treatment of cancer it still is a complicated process . You go to Drs with the confidence that they will fix you . You go into surgery with the confidence that cutting out the enemy will be the end of it and after a brief hiccup life will resume to normal .What a incredible shock to the system! Nothing is ever the same again and the rollercoaster ride called life just gets bumpier and you are left dazed and confused .I was watching Michael J. Fox last night and it occurred to me how life's tragedies are always a learning experience . He was asked if he would go back and change anything .I have always thought that is such a stupid question . Reflecting on woulda coulda shoulda is pointless and doesn't change the here and now .What I hope to achieve is to make the future brighter for my grandchildren by making diseases obsolete. The problem is for instance childhood diseases for when my grandparents were alive became manageable and in some cases eradicated for our generation but because of vaccination issues and fear those horrible diseases are making a comeback .I hope we will always work on achieving a better outcome and only through our own voices are we going to do that .
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Morning all, sending lots of trans Tasman hugs. Special hugs for Karen as you start another round and for Van who is about to start.
How I hated it when I asked said to my onc in October if visits would be yearly and he said no because I am still considered very high risk and always will. (My stats don't explain full story) I felt really angry about that even though I am nearly 6 years from dx - 19th Dec. However I am here confounding them and their predictions.
Had very social weekend and finding it hard to get moving.
Have a great day.
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Goodness, I can't believe how many pages I just had to catch up on. So I will never answer everyone individually. Thinking of you all. I bet the Brissy girls are all excited about next week.
Karen - this group has supported me through lots of meltdowns. Another big hug from me.
Trish - I hope DHs birthday was lovely. Best thoughts for your results. Great idea on photos, well done you.
We had a baby shower for DD on Saturday. It was lovely, she had 35 friends with lots of littlies. We spent yesterday going through pressies and washing baby clothes. I think she received about 35 bunny rugs! Approx 7 weeks to go, Yay.
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Karen, all i can do is offer you lots of hugs and you too Angela. i have not got to that position so therefore cannot begin to imagine the emotional trauma you guys must go through, only those who have been in that postion or stage 1V can understand and chrissy would be a huge support to you. I can only offer you the support and love to help carry you through. I do think often about you girls over the tasman and really wish i could be there in more ways, but i am across the ditch and unable to do alot. Am thinking of you heaps and sending love and hugs yr way. OXOX OX
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Karen and Angel sending you big ((((hugs))))) you are both in my thoughts often.
Trish
xoxox
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Trish, how are you doing? hope you are feeling calm, not too stressed about yr up coming tests. we are with you and i offer you my support in every way i can, you have yr weekend away with the gang this weekend. that will be so exciting meeting them all. i do wish you a very happy time. COOL AS MAN< ENJOY EVERY MOMENT>
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Thanks Midnight, I'm going ok. I will see my dr this afternoon, but I succumbed and started googling bowel and breast cancer, and it seems that ILC can metastasise to the bowel. I probably shouldn't have started to google, but couldn't help myself.
I'll see what my dr can organise this afternoon, but imagine a colonoscopy will be in my very near future. I'm just getting sick and tired of all the tests and procedures and mostly the fear. I've been so happy and healthy lately and everything going really well in my life. Maybe I killed a chinaman recently and didn't realise it!?
Trish
xoxo
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Trish!! STEP AWAY FROM DR GOOGLE!!!! Girl you know better than that!!! Why are you giving yourself angst? Please wait to worry when you KNOW you have something to worry about. First step, see your doc. When you have done that you will have a path to follow.
I'm so looking forward to the end if the week!!!
Love n hugs. Chrissy0 -
lol yes mum :-) you can smack me on Friday
xoxox
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Love n hugs right back at you!!!! Chrissy
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Chrissy it's only Monday!!
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Aly I know!!!!! That's the problem!!! I'm sooooo excited its hard to wait.........lol. Yep the big kid is visiting again!!!!!!......lol.
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Chrissy. i really dont know how you are going to be on friday lol. is it going to be safe to let you out. i am starting to wonder. Na i am very excited for you all. it will be awesome for you gals. You will be worn out b4 you get there if you dont sleep and certainly worn out when its over and heaps to talk about for weeks to come. things like this i get really excited about then it comes and you have a ball and then its over. well i hope you all make happy memories that will keep you all buzzing for weeks. Take care. xxxxx Have A drink for me please, i will have RUM AND COKE THANKS LOL
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Chrissy.....you sound like a kid a Xmas! Lovely to hear your excitement.....
I'm feeling a bit better today....just had coffee with a lovely friend who has leukemia & had a bone marrow transplant a few months back. It was wonderful to see how well she is doing & nice to chat with someone who understands my fears.
Thanks girls for all the cyber (((hugs)))......
Karen x0
