March 2011 chemo-lounge
Comments
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Stilts - congrats! Love your photos, especially you and dd!
Lilylady, so glad you're bouncing back so well and the path results are what we'd want. Ridiculous about the stuffed bra...
Ksmatthews, clear margins - rock on!
Happy bday, Kymn and Maxine!
Re to Mx or not to Mx, I decided I didn't want to live with constant fear of odd mammos or MRIs and subsequent biopsies, etc. My breasts are dense so it makes it hard to find masses. Kay, don't let others try to tell you what's best for you. As has been said, you can always decide on the second breast at a later date. If you're really grappling with it now, call your bs and speak with him/her. A good one will make time for you. Sending you a hug!!0 -
Stilts-couldn't be happier for you. So gald you will have someone to cheer for you. At my place there is no bell or anything to mark the occaision. I still have a year of Herceptin so maybe they will get happy then.
I have yet to see the RO. I know I am refusing boosts due to increased risk for LE. Not sure when I will start because of other possible surgeries.
I still can't belive how easy this has been after the surgery. We have had beautiful weather and it is killing me not to b out in the flowers. I did some serious dead-heading and picked a bunch of tomatoes. Walked a slow mile today also---but also needed a big power nap when I was done. I haven't had to do that since chemo ended. I have an onc visit on Fri to discuss strategies with him. Drains are already slowing down and chging to a lighter color. telling myself maybe by Monday. My BS went on a houseboat trip and won;t be back til then. The comoression bra is bugging me a little but I haven't needed a pain pill. Took an Ambien last night in case I couldn't sleep. Maybe again tonight.
Thanks for all your good thoughts-you girls are the best.
Wanted to add-remember I did no recon-that's probably why mine has been pain free and able to move my arms anywhere
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Gosh, lilylady, where does the time go? It doesn't seem that long ago you were posting on the boards for the first time. May God bless you as you continue thru your healing process! And that goes for the rest of us on the boards, too!
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Lilylady, that is wonderful how well you feel and are gettting around so quickly after surgery! I think the recon probably will make it harder for me, plus I am much more of a whiner and complainer, so there will be that as well.
Thanks for the advice on the MX. I also have dense breasts. My 4.5 cm tumor didn't evem show up on the mamogram, the only thing that showed up was thickening of the skin. I felt it though, so I will trust that I'll feel it again if should ever come back. I am guessing I'll get MRI's or ultrasounds instead or in addition to mamograms to check in the future as well. I am comfortable with just the single MX, that is what all the docs say and it will be easier to recover from. As you say, I can always get the other one taken care of later if anxiety gets too high. Just have to get the family and friends to accept that.
Thinking of you today Stilts! Good luck with the last treatment.
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Stilts - thanks for the photos..I hope you feel as good as you look.
Penny - hoo-ray..you did it..completed your LAST cancer treatment. You have kicked cancer's butt.
Ksmatthews - great news on your clear margins. How relieved you must feel.
Kay - That's a personnal decision whether to have both breast removed or not. I had friends and family telling me that i should have them both removed. After talking to my onc and BS they both assured me there was no medical reason to have both removed. So i made the decision to have the left removed and have recon on both breast. Actually my recon surgery was Tuesday.
Lilylady - Glad to hear your mx went well sorry for the hospital experience. Great news that you have clear margins and your chest walls are clear.
My recon surgery turned into an overnight stay. I had a bad reaction to the anesthetic. For some reason i couldn't wake up. My surgery was scheduled for 11:30 a.m and I had been fasting since 10:00 Monday night, so needless to say i was starved before the surgery started. My surgery began around 3:30 p.m. it was a 3 1/2 surgery. I understand i was given to much anesthetic and pain meds. i came out of recovery around 9:45 p.m. still groggy & nausated. I couldn't keep any thing down like. jello and apple juice so my PS made the decision to keep me overnight for observation. I don't remember any of this. I only remember waking up at 3:55 a.m. not sure where i was. My son was there with me, he told me the nurses kept coming in every 15 mins trying to get me to open my eyes. I can honestly say that was the worst reaction i have ever had to the anesthetic. I was finally able to eat a small bowl of grits y'day morning and i was released around 1:00 p.m. y'day. All in all my surgery went well, of course i can't see what my new boobs look like but i know my ps does beautiful work so i am sure they are FABULOUS. I'll have to keep the drains in until next Thursday..YUK unless the fluid output gets less than 20ml for the entire day. I'm in a little pain more from the good breast than for the mx'd one, but i'm sooo glad to have another step behind me.
Thinking of you all.
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Yay Stilts! We are celebrating with you.
kay: I agree with all that it is a personal decision. I will speak up as one who did the single MX. My doctor is agreeing to do a mammo/MRI on 6-month cycle (annual mammo then MRI 6 months later) because of dense tissue and because they did NOT detect the tumor on the mammo. It is TOTALLY a personal decision, but I just wanted to say that thus far I am happy with mine. I am lopsided, but I just had a hard time removing the healthy breast out of fear. That is just me. Please know, all, that I totally understand the BMX decision and support it, as well. Also, I know I can have the prophylactic MX later if I want to. Good luck.
lilylady: The drains were the worst! I was completely liberated when they were removed; for me it was 6 days post-surgery. Lightening of the fluid color is very good!
Rads is going well for me so far. I have had 15 of 28 and my skin feels like I have a slight sunburn. My doctor recommends straight olive oil for the skin. Pretty easy just going to the kitchen cabinet!
I went for my 6-month post-surgery exam the other day with the bs and all looks good! What a relief to have a quick visit with no scans, no tests, and only good news.
penny: how does it feel to be all done? Are you going on hormone therapy?
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When I told my onc and the BS I wanted the good breast gone they were both very happy about it. Onc said that is such a powerful personal decision that he would never have brought it up since that side was cancer free-as proved by the biopsy after surgery.
Mine was a lifestyle and cosmetic decision. As I have said before I work in a factory at a very physical job-we wear big fire retardant coveralls ( I am an Electrician so they make us wear them ) so I nver wore a bra there. Just a tank top underneath the coveralls. You could not tell I was female other than my big beautiful head of hair (oh please grow back pretty and not curly-and way faster than you are doing right now damnit!!)
Anyway a lifestyle decision for me. Factory work, gardening, bicycling,tennis, hanging with friends and family-no one else tried to influence me. I just didn;t want to always have to wear a bra and a foob. I was a B/C cuo so it wasn;t a balance issue either. I am happy and confident in my decision. I OWN it in other words. I really admire the girls going thru the recon. So many more dr visits surgeries and pain-but hopefull a great rack when they are done. It;s not like you can go wrong either way.
When I get fitted for foobs I will be certainly be glad to have them and they can live in the drawer with my wig (Trixie),,,coming out on worthy occaisions. Weddings or a really nice restaraunt.
I see scarves are still going to be big for fall/winter and with a sweter I will be good to go most places. Since I am on house arrest my typing has run rampant-sorry about that
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deedee: I was writing at the same time as you; sorry your surgery was so awful. That is pretty scary stuff. I am glad you are awake now!
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You all are a busy bunch! I had surgery last Friday to restart the reconstruction. So far so good...knock on wood. He cleaned up some scar tissue and it is much easier to breath now. I told him I thought something had attached itself as it pulled when I took deep breaths. All gone now.
Eyebrows and eyelashes which fell out three weeks after chemo are all pretty much back in now, and hair is coming in, although way too slowly for me!
Stilts-loved the pictures! So nice.
Had my third herceptin only treatment last Tuesday and for the first time, starting Sunday, I have been achy all over randomly. Sometimes in legs,, feet, ankles, hands, etc. It would just pop up. Yesterday was the worst day and suddenly, today is fine. It was more annoying than soreness from the surgery.
I hope it is from the herceptin and not Tamoxifen as there is a closer end to that! I'm also hoping that maybe the surgery triggered it and it won't happen again. Not sure if I really believe that though!
On another board, someone has this as their signature and I just love it.
Life is not a journey to the grave with intentions of arriving safely in a pretty well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming ... "WOW! What a ride!"
Have a great day. Weather is gorgeous here in Indianapolis and I am going out to enjoy it.
Jill
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Thanks MaxineO - I'm GLAD to be awake too :-)
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I DID IT....I'M FINALLY PFC !!!!...
CHEMO CHAPTER FINISHED AND I'M ON TO RADIATION. SOME CO-WORKERS FROM MY PHARMACY DEPARTMENT CAME TO THE OFFICE AND SURPRISED ME WITH ONE OF THOSE "EDIBLE ARRANGEMENTS"SO WE HAD A LITTLE PARTY...MADE ME CRY WHILE MY LAST TAXOL WAS INFUSING. CLOSE FRIEND, DAUGHTER AND I HAD LUNCH ON THE WAY HOME SO NOW IT'S TIME FOR A NAP!!!What on earth am I going to do with all my "free time" on Thursday mornings ? Haha
" In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins-not through strength but by perseverance."
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yeah stilts!!!!! So happy for you!!!
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Yeah Stilts! Glad it's over for you.
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Hurray Stilts! So good to be done
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Stilts-I think you are the last of us to finish. We can close the chemo closet and move that much closer to the finish for all of us!!
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15 min walk with my sister on day 2, after a nightmare night, so I'm proud of myself! Nite all! xoxo
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Lily - I am so glad you are getting over the surgery so well. Its lovely to get into the garden isn't it. Its winter here, but I still have a few bulbs starting to come up. Recon with implants cant be done for me and I am way too much of a wimp to go for DIEP, LAT or Dorsal flaps. I think it will be easier to get foobs for two rather than trying to match the existing one so its also a bit of a convenience/cosmetic decision for me as well as the recurrence thing.
DeeDee - Gosh that sounds scary, the whole not waking up for ages bit, I am sure it will be worth it when you get to see your fabulous new boobs though. (What are grits?)
Maxine - more than halfway though rads! - I never thought of olive oil, but I think they just want us thoroughly greased up so the skin doesn't dry and crack.
It feels great to be finished - people say that it is a nervous time but I feel very positive, maybe because apart from the neck burn I actually feel very well. I am on Arimidex for 5 years, plus I take a mini aspirin and a Vit D each day.Jill - thats interesting about the scar tissue - I am going to have him clear up some scar tissue on the right when he removes the left and am also hoping it will be more comfortable then. I have been told to take 15ml of good organic fish oil for joint pains from the Arimidex - might be worth you giving it a go
Stilts - celebrate, it all gets better from where you are
So is that right that we are all done wih chemo now - amazing when you think back, I am sure there were times when all of us felt like giving up bit here we all are stronger than ever. Have a wonderful weekend my friends!
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Thank you all for your thoughts on the single vs. double mastectomy. Once again, you have helpled me out so much. It is nice to know that I am not the only one who struggled with the decision. It's good to know also though that you were at peace and stopped worrying about your decision once you made it. That's where I need to be too. I think I'm there.
Yahoo, Stilts! Glad you got to celebrate too. I'm playing Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the jukebox for you and all of us.
Yahoo! This is your celebration
Yahoo! This is your celebration
Celebrate good times,come on! (Let's celebrate)
Celebrate good times, come on! (Let's celebrate)
There's a party goin' on right here
A celebration to last throughout the years
So bring your good times, and your laughter too
We gonna celebrate your party with you
Come on now
Celebration
Let's all celebrate and have a good time
Celebration
We gonna celebrate and have a good time
It's time to come together
It's up to you, what's your pleasure
Everyone around the world
Come on!
Yahoo! It's a celebration
Yahoo!
Celebrate good times, come on!
It's a celebration
Celebrate good times, come on!
Let's celebrate
We're gonna have a good time tonight
Let's celebrate, it's all right
We're gonna have a good time tonight
Let's celebrate, it's all right
Baby...
We're gonna have a good time tonight (Ce-le-bra-tion)
Let's celebrate, it's all right
We're gonna have a good time tonight (Ce-le-bra-tion)
Let's celebrate, it's all right
Yahoo!
Yahoo!
Celebrate good times, come on! (Let's celebrate)
Celebrate good times, come on!
It's a celebration!
Celebrate good times, come on! (Let's celebrate)
(ad lib)
Come on and celebrate, good times, tonight (Celebrate good times, come on!)
'Cause everything's gonna be all right
Let's celebrate (Celebrate good times, come on)
(Let's celebrate)...0 -
HOO-RAY..HOO-RAY..HOO-RAY we are all done with Chemo !!!!!
Penny - grits are a FINE "haha" southern breakfast cuisine..lol. Actually grits are kind of like oatmeal but made from corn and they are more grainer than oatmeal. I usually eat them with salt, pepper, butter and cheese...they are great :-)
Enjoy your Chemo free day ladies.
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Well today I took off my surgical vest and looked at what used to be my chest. I am so concave from shoulder to shoulder. My stomach which isn't that big looks like a preggie bellie because there is nothing to catch the eye up above. all that smart retail therapy I did with ruffles and gathers and pattern-not a chance in hell it will even begin to cover this.
My incisons are so big they cross my entire armpit and almost to my back-and that is with no node removal. way bigger than I thought. BS says in order to make it as flat as possible (which I asked her to do) she had to extend it that far. Still o pain other than the drains pulling. Which are coming out Tuesday if I have to pull them myself...and I'm not kidding on that.
Better less cranky news. Scan results from sat are really great. No sign of liver tumor and 3 lung tumors are tiny. So we proceed on to appts later in the month to discuss surgery. Tumor board meetin postponed til after those appts. Onc says we will have a stronger case if I have seen the surgeons and charmed them with my winning personality. ow come on guys fon;t thow up in your mouth-I am capable of charm at timee. I am way more comfortable being "factory girl" but I can bring on the lady stuff if I have to. My onc is crazy about me but probably because I am his first curable STage IV.
I hope the lady who brought the "build a bear" breast kit isn't involved-she saw the really nasty side of me. I may need that damn DD just to get even with my shoulders. My belly looks huge-and it isn't- but with nothing else to stick out it's the first thing you see. I am going to try on some of my nicer clothes to see what they look like.
I still would have made the same decision but it was quite shocking. o those who still have surgery coming up all those women were right-chemo was worse than surgery. Of course chemo is nearly 5 months long and I will be over this in another week.
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lilylady: sorry about the shock. I think we get all this mental preparation done ahead of tim (kind of), but it's a serious shock to lose a breast (or two). It's hard to wrap your head around what a flat chest could look like, and it's really emotionally difficult to lose the breasts you've carried around for so long. Great news on the scans, though. I am really happy to hear that news! I hope the doctor will take those drains out soon, so you don't have to!
We are ALL done with chemo! Who would have thought this day would come...So glad it did!
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Lilylady-Sorry to hear about the shock of how your chest looks. But such great news about your scans! Yay!
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LilyLady - so glad about the scans, but sorry you are worried about how your chest looks
I have only had the one breast off at the moment and am wearing a soft prosthesis which has cotton wool type stuff in so you can put in / take out as much as you want.I got this and a couple of really comfortable bras from http://www.breastcarewa.com.au/ Obviously this is an Aussie site but if you have a look at the bras and prosthesis here you could go to the manufacturer sites. The Amoena stuff looks good.I am still using the Amoena 2128 I got for post mastectomy but will get new ones and Amoena breast forms after the other boob comes off.
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I got my first shower yesterday and really looked at my chest. My bad breast has a nice straight 10 inch line that goes below my arm pit. It had become lopsided so I was surprised that she was able to do a nice straight line.
My good breast however goes straight for about 5 inches then has a huge hook all the way to the top of the armpit crease. When I looked the other day when I took the vest off for the first time it was a quick look down. Yesterday I stood in front of the mirror and really stared. When the BS saw me the next day at the hospital she mentioned that she might be 1/4 off between the 2 sides. The incision on the left side is 5 inches away from the line she drew before surgery-did she think I wouldm't notice?. I can't imagine any reason why this huge hook is there. It is chafing horribly because it is in that crease. I see her Tuesday to get my drains out-I am so pissed right now. I had no nodes but may as well have for the nerves she has cut thru with this bullshit incision. The incision is almost a foot long. I told her I did not want to end up with dog ears so she said the incisons might be a little bit longer but I cant see how a huge hook helps. No changing it now but it will show in any kind of summer top I will wear.
I just feel like a total freak show. Being so concave and shrunken looking just wasn't how I pictured it. I thought FLAT. I don't look swollen but if I am and it shrinks even further my chest will touch my backbone. I don't regret the no recon but I sure didn't know I was siging up for total disfigurement
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lilylady: had some of the same thoughts you are having after surgery...I, too, felt concave with a big belly after my bilateral mx...I have found since February that my body alignment and posture has changed quite a bit and I am much more comfortable with my body image...so give it some time...the drains were awful (I remember having to take a pain pill 1/2 hour before stripping them) but they served their purpose and I didn't have any infections....sorry it's so upsetting to you right now....give your body time to heal...
Ladies who have had chemo and radiation....is the radiation fatigue easier to deal with than the chemo fatigue or is that wishful thinking on my part ???...hoping my energy level will be on the upswing soon !!!
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Hi ladies...just wanted to pop in and say HI! I enjoyed our vacation but now it's back to reality. The movers are coming tomorrow and they will pack the house and load the truck Monday and Tuesday. I will officially be in Chicago later this week.....I did post photos of me with hair and new foobs on the Cold Cap thread in the Help Me Get Through Treatment section - fyi. You can check out my new rack if you like in my sundress (LOL!).
Lily: SO glad you are doing well after surgery. I am sorry the incisions have been disappointing. I think for most of us we did not look anything like we imagined we would. I know my post OP look was not what I thought it would look like. I hope you continue to heal well and feel OK.
I am off to bed...big day tomorrow. I will be checking in when I can. It has been 13 weeks since I finished chemo...can you believe that???? Time is flying by.....
I hope all of you are doing well and are healthy and happy. My song for the week "Moving Out" by Billy Joel (because of our move) but my favorite Billy Joel song is Scenes From An Italian Restaurant so I will play that too!!!!
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Stilts - hearty congrats on finishing!!
As a general statement, it's making me sad to think that our reason for gathering here in the lounge is coming to an end...
Lilylady, I an so sorry to hear about your upset and disappointment. Don't blame you one bit re being ticked at the bs. I anticipate my gut will also appear prominent post surgery (though I am getting TEs but it'll be a while before the get filled up. I don't want to be a Pollyanna - but I'm thinking you'll notice the scar (in a summer top for example) more than anyone else will. At least that's my hope for you. Keep us posted and let us know how we can support you. The news re your scans is awesome!
DeeDee - thank goodness you roused and all is well. It's amazing to me how many ways we can get off track on our roads to recovery...
Kay - your Wed surgery is coming up fast. I'll keep you in my prayers for an uneventful day and no pain. Thx for the great song selection. Especially liked "everyone around the world" representing our far reaching group!!
Sending hugs to one and all.0 -
I am starting to deal with my new reality. Sorry I did the big freakout on you guys. I had a pretty emotional weekend. Stilts-thank you for the reassurance. I have noticed myself hunching my shoulders and am making a conscious effort to keep them pulled back. The stomach sticking out thing I hope to work on but with other surgeries possibly coming up not sure how far I will get.
Kay-are you doing an overnight stay in the hospital? 1 suggestion I have is to stow a few favorite snacks in your purse. The only thing they offered me were saltines and diet vanilla pudding. I would have killed for some cheddar Goldfish and a couple of Hershey Kisses. I also think the wedge pillow i bought from bed Bath and Beyond ($29) has been a big help. I also have 2 smaller pillows I put on either side of me to hold my arms up. I have also been taking my Ambien-which I have been off of for months. It knocks me out. Still haven't needed again kind of pain pill -surreal that having that much stuff removed from your body and it doesn't hurt. Nerves are starting to tingle. feels like spiders walking on the back of my arm. At first I got up to look in the mirrow because I can't quite stretch my arms that far to feel it.
MDG-glad your vacation was so much fun. You look truly awesome. I really have hair envy. I wondered have you officially quit your job? Do you have weight restrictions-thinking about the unpacking at the new place.
I need some posts about hair. I am 5 weeks PFC. At first the top was starting to come in but really sparse. It seems to have stalled and now the sides are past the 5 oclock shadow stage and thick and nothing going on at the top. It is almost an inch long but there isn;t much of it. Thinking about cutting it down.
Penny-thanks for the encouraging words and advice about the bras. I did order one of the Aeomena. There is a website called breastfree.org that has great links and descriptions of all the forms and bras. BS says no forms til 8 weeks minimum. Stuffing only-and I already know i won't go that route. Sewingnut has given me some great tips on fixing up regular bras also.
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Happy Monday to all !!!...will be a busy week...have a nutrition appt. on Wednesday morning (will share some notes with you all) and decided to call a contact I had about Reiki treatments...guess what???!!!!...she's a 9 year breast cancer survivor !!!!...is that neat or what ???? She told me studies have found Reiki during radiation significantly reduces side effects and helps increase energy so I plan to give it a try...first appt. Thursday morning. 0
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Hi Ladies, so glad to hear that all of us are now done chemo....wow what a ride it has been for us all I remember joining this little lounge so scared of what was to come and now here we are. I have had 10 radiation treatments so far, the fatigue isnt too bad yet, could do with a little nap in the afternoons if I wasnt working but over all not even close to chemo fatigue at least not yet anyhow. I am off to Victoria on Wed for a 5 day weekend. My DH sister is turning 50 and it looks like all 8 brothers and sisters will be showing along with all the SI and children should be a good time.
on the hair issue mine is coming in pretty even, prolly could go without covering but not quite ready for that step although it would be nice to loose the scarves I am so tired of looking at myself in the mirror, ok ok no pity party. I have hair growing down there now but not on my legs as of yet.
Hope you all have a great monday
hugs Kymn
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