February 2012 Chemo
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susan i did not have such bone pain on the adriamyacin/cytoxan as i have had on this taxotere/cytoxan...i do the claritin for the neulasta shot but this is horrible...every bone everywhere hurts- including my teeth!
as for weight- i actually lost 8# in the beginning and have maintained 6# of that loss..which for me is a good thing! i also have not had the sweeling you have so maybe that is part of your weight gain????do you ordinarily take anything for "water"?do you(did you) still have periods?i'm 12 yrs post hysterectomy so....clutching at straws for ya for answers....
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Jus thought I would post a hair pic from today. I'm now a little over 10 weeks PFC. Went topless in front of friends for the first time this weekend. Boy there's alot of gray in there LOL! Oh well, as soon as its long enough I'm going to dye it.
Amazing what has grown in a little more than a month.
The first pick was taken May 20th and the 2nd July 2nd.
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mlb, your hair is filling out nicely. i'm jealous.
moonflwr, no periods since chemo threw me into menopause (yeah, menopause!). the steroids would definitely add water weight to the body as does the herceptin, i hear. i was hoping that now that i've been post steroids for two weeks, the water weight would drop off. sigh. and double sigh.
better fat than dead. :-)
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Grit
I'm going to repost. Its a bit of a pain to post pics here I find anyway but it double posted so I deleted them. Going to try again in a separate post. Re the weight. I was up 10 pounds and it dropped off last time I weighed in for Herceptin a week ago so it will go don't worry. I think the steroids are the culperit personally.
Speaking of hair, Herceptin slows the growth. AEM posted pics last week on Hair, Hair, Hair and she's way ahead of me!
Here's trying to post pics again. I take these every once in a while to remind myself that its actually growing even if it feels painfully slow.
First one is from May 20 and 2nd July 2.
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Just got back from seeing my sweet surgeon. She came running in saying " you have had a complete response" six weeks from now I will need three weeks of rads.
Drinking champagne and feeling good.
I had 32 nodes removed!0 -
Ali, Congratulations!!! That is wonderful news. I want to be just like you when I grow up. :-)
MLB, thanks for the pics. That explains a lot. So in a month, I might look like I have some decent hair. It's so hot here, I can't wear the scarves anymore without going mad, so I am a la naturel when it comes to my head. I don't look very purty, but at least I can freely wipe the sweat off my head. It's been a crazy heat wave here in Washington, DC
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MLB, that is about where my hair is right now. I am sorry you have pain, that is not fun. Grit, I haven't gained weight, I have lost about 5 lbs, probably due to my almost constant diarrhea. I went naked headed today, temp is over 90 and I said to h*ll with the scarf. I think I scared a few people! LOL. Ali, I am so happy for you whoooo whoooo!
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My hair grow looks the same and is SLOW growing!! I also have gained about 15 lbs. That part just isn't fair. I think when we are given the diagnosis we should be able to place an order for the size we want to become after tx. Oh well wishful thinking!
Great news Ali!0 -
Ali
Great news! Wow that's alot of nodes they took. For all you went through was worth it!
This was the first time I went topless in front of friends. I was at a friends having a swim and BBQ and it was so so hot here too. I asked if anyone would mind and no one did. When it grows a bit more I'm going to have it coloured. I think it would look like better coverage once the gray is coloured to match. I still put the wig on going shopping etc but I'f I just run out to move the sprinkler or get the mail, I just through a baseball hat on. Don't want to scare the kiddies LOL!
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Myleft - it's coming in very even
It looks good !!0 -
MLB- it looks good! more than I have but I hope to get there slowly but surely.
YAY Ali!!! such great news!
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lumpy and susan - hope you are feeling better tonight.
Jen - hope you are feeling well, and enjoy your vacation! A couple friends and I were hoping to see Magic Mike this coming weekend...ummm looks yummy! Maybe that will wake up my libido, it's been sleeping especially since the last chemo treatment.
Susan I gained 12 lbs through chemo. It was not the chemo, herceptin, or steroids, it was me eating to comfort myself, and eating to get the nasty taste out of my mouth. I need to start exercising and cut out the junk food. I hate to exercise but I can't stand that I am 12 lbs heavier; I needed to lose 20 lbs BEFORE gaining this 12 lbs. *sigh*
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I am just like Christina.. I felt ill during chemo so I would eat whatever DID sound good. I would go back and forth between being down 14lb to up 5 lbs. At last visit I was down about 10lbs from the start but keep in mind I lost 2 D cup breasts too.. that counts for some weight I bet!
I really want to start swimming once 1) my stitches heal enough I can get into water and 2) I figure out how to do that without any breasts for my current suit.
Thanks Christina- I cant wait for our vacation! it will be great to see my family that I havent seen in months before this all happened!
Tomorrow hopefully getting my drains out and a long overdue pedicure with a friend!!
I would send hugs and sunbeams to everyone but I dont think too many of us wnat any more sun for a bit! so lots of hugs!!
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Omg, you get good news and then bad. The company that regulates us has gone into liquidation over night. So that means all our commission we get every month will stop until we get with another company. That could take months so our savings will have to be used.
My garden was going to be done tomorrow have told him the news. He says he will bill me for the stuff that has been ordered. We don't have a contract and no money has been given we do have a quote for the whole thing. What do we do?0 -
Ali
That's crappy news. I can only imagine the time it will take to sort something like that out. To be fair to the gardener, you should ask him for proof of the material of the things that have been ordered and mabey have him work on a portion of the garden with a view to completion at a later date. In all liklihood he hasn't arranged for the delivery of all of the material yet. What a trickle down effect!
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Ugh Ali, that stinks.
My mom and I are working out the details for her to fly out to stay with us when I have my UMX. I am not looking forward to the UMX but I am really looking forward to seeing my mom. I am in MO and she is in NJ...the last time I saw her was in August when I flew out with my husband to visit. I'm also planning on flying out to PA to visit my pregnant sister the weekend before the UMX.
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((((Ali))))) that sucks. Good luck.
Christina, I hope you enjoy your visit to your sister. I know you will enjoy having your mom here for your mx. Take care. Much love to all.0 -
I'm freaking out. It doesn't take much to make that happen these days... a couple of weeks ago I wrote down the names of the PSs that do breast reconstruction at the hospital system that is in-network for me. I got the names off of the hospital website. Just now I went to their website again, and none of them are listed anymore. There are only two PSs listed at all, and they are totally different. Now I'm afraid that they have no PSs that do reconstruction and I will have to go out-of-network. What are the odds all the PSs that do reconstruction would be gone?
Still have not scheduled my PS consult (obviously) to find out about reconstruction...I'm not sure why I am putting it off. Anyone want to psychoanalyze that?
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Um, because you are scared and its one more big thing to do? Christina, there is no rush, it will get done when you are ready. When you make your apt, you will get a feel for the ps, and will be able to tell if it is the right one. Much love.
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ALL:
I haven't logged on for a while. I am so miserable I haven't the energy to read or reply. But I need your support/answers/encouragement.
It is now two weeks tomorrow (Thursday) since the last of my 12 weekly Taxols. I have neuopathy to the point it hurts to type. My fingers and toes are really hurting. My nails look weird. Several of the toenails are discolored. I am so tired I can barely move. My STD (short term disab) has ended so I'm trying to work. (Although I have LTD (long term disab) that kicks in now, I would only get paid 60% of wages. Can't afford that.
If I can just feel these finger/toe discomfort will go away in time, I would feel some hope. I am so scared that it is forever. The daily temps of high 90's don't help any. I am so weary and despondent. Haven't felt this 'down' since I was first diagnosed. Too tired to even be upset over anything happening around me. Don't care about daughters, food, nothing. just want to hibernate and stay in bed forever. Help. Does this get better?
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((((Fldrmr)))) hang in there. I have some neuropathy, but not too much and my nails seem to be ok, so I really don't know what you are going through right now. But I do know we all hit the bottom sometimes, and girl, you are scraping the bottom big time. I hope you don't stay down too long but wallow if you want. Everyone deserves a wallow now and then. Get some help if you don't feel better soon. Otherwise wallow away for a bit. Much love.
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Fldreamer - hang in there. You are one day ahead of me PFC. I don't have neuropathy (except some minor tingling in my left hand) but I am very fatigued and have no energy, I also have muscle fatigue and SOB. I don't know what you are dealing with, but I know it's been a long road to get to this point. I hope you can find some answers. Have you tried any supplements for the neuropathy?
Sending hugs and healing thoughts.0 -
Fldreamer. i am going through same thing (nails, neuropathy, tired, and swollen ankles). I need to call my doc. There's a drug for the neuropathy and a diuretic would help. like you, i am into long term disability. i've considered takung a day or so to ease myself back into work. It's hard to jump right back in. there's also a software that lets you speak and it types, dragon naturally speaking. you and i will make it through in spite of things sucking.
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Christina
I had my MX in December and haven't even seen a PS yet to talk reconstruction. I had no idea if I was getting rads or not and even though I didn't at the end of the day I'm so not even ready at this point to even discuss it. I might even end up waiting until I'm done Herceptin at the end of the year. With so much going on with chemo, H, MUGA scans, trying to get back into the swing of work, moving my Mom into a retirement home next week, moving myself eventually in the next couple of months, I can't deal with another surgery right now.
FLDREAMER
I'm sorry you feel so down but I think its completely normal. You've been through the mill and surely exhausted physically, mentally and emotionally. Gritgirl has some good advise there, speak to your MO. Cyberhugs to you hun.
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Went and had fluid drained out of side breast omg not good, they don't give pain meds. They took 7 large Needles and filled them. Surgeon tried first and couldn't do it without US but boy did she try. I screamed and she told me not to be a baby, i fainted with the pain. The other lady found a numb place, it did hurt but I could bare it.
DH has seen a few networks so should get sorted soon.
Called my hairdresser and asked her to colour my hair, she says I have to wait six months.
Dealing with SE is so hard but it does get better and soon you forget how bad it was.0 -
Hi Everybody,I can definitely attest to the presence of 'rads' brain, I feel fuzzier than I did on chemo, so please forgive me if I ramble in general instead of giving the personalized responses. Maybe if I do it by topic it'll help.Exchange surgery (I think this was Gritgirl) is when you have a tissue expander swapped out for a permanent implant. I have to say, the TE hasn't been bad for me, which is lucky since I will have it around for six months post rads, at least. Still contemplating reconstruction options, but it depends on how my tissue recovers from radiation.Rads--I have three more to go. My skin is light tan in the radiated area, and that's about it--very lucky in that regard. I started using the MyGirls cream about 4 weeks prior to the beginning of treatment, and wonder if that helped. Who knows, it could just be genetics, but I'm not complaining. I'm not feeling particularly fatigued, either, so Susan, you may find that radiation isn't such an ordeal. It's hella better than chemo, for me at least.Neuropathy--FLdrmer, hold on, it does get better! I'll be 2 months PFC on Saturday, and the tips of my thumb and first two fingers are still a bit numb, and I have intermittent numbness in a couple of my toes., but it's definitely better than previously. I have heard that Taxotere can be worse than Taxol, and Abraxane better, but I think that the DD versus 12 week regimen also affects things.Hair. You guys are hirsute wonders! I don't have nearly as much, although I do have the Sinead O'Conner look going on. I'm actually hoping that I can have some extensions put in up top once it gets to a certain length, b/c it seems to me that that would make it look more like a short haircut I chose myself than a 'growing out from chemo' look. I still have to check that out.Now I'm going to rant a bit about surgery, cording, and lymphedema. Those of you who have not yet had surgery, grill your surgeon about what he or she does to minimize the chance of lymphedema. Some doctors put the affected arm in a compression sleeve during surgery, for example. Some are more delicate in how they remove lymph nodes. Make sure that you have a baseline measurement of your arm prior to surgery, which was not mentioned to me, although other surgeons in my center do it. (and I'm at freaking Dana Farber.)Also, make sure that you get physical therapy from the get go--Ali, are you getting any at all? If not, nag those suckers till you get some PT. Developing cording increases the risk of developing LE, and the more nodes that are removed, the higher risk as well. And then rads on top of that ups the risk further.They are still not sure if I have LE or not--it could be rads-related inflammation, but I am, shall we say, skeptical. And also P.O.'ed that I didnt get PT integrated as part of my surgical schedule.0
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My arm still hurts but is slightly better and it all feels better after the build up of fluid has gone. Have ordered henna cream hair dye, no chemicals and can be used whilst having chemo. I'm 9 weeks out so I'm going to use it, can't cope with the grey hairs anymore.
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the hair that i do have growing on my head is very much coming in grey--i had some grey before-hard earned medals of my life!--but seems like mucho of my head is now going to be grey--and it is all coming in very thin...used to have very very thick hair...am thinking maybe since i am still getting T/C i am not done losing?????
personally i am tired of the wig look but would really love to just get my eyebrows /lashes back!
when i read some of your posts, folks, i feel so lucky not to have the issues you do...and guilty/selfish that i don't. sending hugs and prayers.....
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Ali
I can't believe you had to go through that without some form of pain releif!! Absolultly brutal.
Lumpy
Don't feel guilty, you've done your share girl! Speaking of eyebrows, mine are coming it but growing straight out!! There is still a sparse area on my right brow but I had to trim them back so it didn't look so ridiculous. Lots of grey here too. Can wait for it to be a bit longer and get it coloured. I think it would look like better coverage too.
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My brows and lashes have grown back (yay!); I felt like a reptile without them.As for the hair coming in grey, my chemo nurse told me to expect that, but that it's temporary and that the regular color hair will grow in. I'm going to take a tip from Ali and invest in some henna-like product in the meantime.....0
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