Lumpectomy Lounge....let's talk!
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Hi GoodC,
Sorry you have gone through so many surgeries trying to get a clean margin. My BS was hoping for a 2mm clean margin for me, but only got 1mm clean margin in one area. He said a clean margin is a clean margin and 1mm was okay.
The following info is from the breastcancer.org website:
How large do the margins need to be? In February 2014, the American Society for Radiation Oncology and the Society of Surgical Oncology issued new guidelines saying that clear margins, no matter how small as long as there was no ink on the cancer tumor, should be the standard for lumpectomy surgery.
Rads only shrunk my bad girl at little.... definitely not a cup size.
Mx is a huge surgery. I think I would consult another PS for an opinion.
Good luck as you try to make your decisions.
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Thanks for your feedback! Yes, I saved that statistic about margins too! I have an appt for a second opinion in a week, a meeting scheduled with a plastic surgeon and an appt for a fourth lumpectomy in case the PS says he will have no trouble restoring my breast. One thing for CERTAIN, nothing is CERTAIN! Has the radiation created any pain in your breast? I hope you're pain free and happy!
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GoodC, welcome. What crummy time you've had of it. I'm so sorry. You'll find lots of answers and support here.
One thing I would request is for you to make sure the diagnosis and treatments on your profile are made public. That helps us to tailor our suggestions to your particular situation.
I'm an A cup and, unlike you, needed only 1 lumpectomy. My margins were small. I had radiation and don't see that my bad girl is any smaller than it was after the lx. I do have a dent on the underside of my breast (where the lump was) but it's no big deal. The size of my breast post-radiation was never a concern for me. Getting rid of the cancer was and still is of prime importance. If I decide I don't like the shape of my breast I'll have plastic surgery (not very likely). Radiation didn't cause any pain in my breast during or afterwards.
Try to stay positive - I know it must be difficult. Use the resources on this site as well as the forums. Lots of good info here.
HUGS!!!
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GoodConstitution... I don't have DCIS but I guess it depends on how important the cosmetic result is to you personally. If I am reading right it looks like your BS,PS, Rad and MO are rec. Mastectomy.Upstaebee, Our stats/situation are very close so I find your posts very informative. (except you are younger than I am)
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Pat, yes looks like we have a similar DX, I know the waiting before the lumpectomy was the worst, but you are almost there. {{hugs}}
I was so nervous about it, I'd never really had surgery unless you count the 2 c-sections, but I don't really count them. They are obviously, but at that time I didn't care what they did to me as long as they got the baby out!!! LOL I'd never been put to sleep is more the thing and I was nervous about that. Funny enough, the actual day of the surgery, I was fine. I was very calm in the hospital waiting around, joking with the nurses doing my localization, even when the first attempt wasn't quite right and they had to do it again. My husband was the wreck, but he's been a wreck the whole time so I've kind of had to be the one to keep it together, and that day was no different. Once I got there is was more, okay let's do this thing, get it out of me and let me go home.
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Hello Ladies! I am recently diagnosed, and my lumpectomy and SNB is scheduled for May 18th. I have to be there all day, but can go home that night. I'm wondering what all of you did bra wise after your surgery? Shoudl I go get a sports bra ( I don't have one). I'm also wondering how quickly all of you went back to work? I have a meeting on Thursday at work I'd like to go to - but I'm not sure how much pain to expect and for how long? Looking for some wisdom for those who have already done it!
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Hi Tresjoli2....I had my LX on Thursday and was fine by Saturday...but was a bit tired. I think a lot of the tiredness was due to the stress just leading up to the LX. I took the pain pills to help me sleep because it was hard to get comfortable. Everyone's recovery is different. It helps if you're in good shape to begin with.. but still no guarantees how you will respond. You should be fine to attend the meeting...but I'd have a plan B just in case your not up to it. My docs said to plan on 2 weeks but 2 days was more like it for me. As far the the bras, I found a front closure bra from Target or Walmart...I think it was Jockey brand. I got it in a size larger. Front closure is good if you have any issue raising your arms after LX...some people have no problem at all.
Welcome and best of luck to you!!
p.s. I don't work but chauffeur my teenage daughter around and was back to driving 3 days after my LX
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Tresjoli2, Welcome! Glad you found us. For a bra, I wore a Genie bra (I got a size larger than I would normally wear). You will not want to raise your arms so something that you either step into or front closes and is SOFT is what you want. You'll also want a front closing top. The easier the dressing the better.
I don't work but I felt fine that day. I did take the pain pill they gave me in recovery but used Tylenol (yup, plain old Tylenol) at night. I would expect you to be fine to go to your Thursday meeting. Try to take it easy for as long as you can. Your body needs for you to rest so it can heal. Remember NO underwires. With an SNB you won't want them anyway - that incision is a major annoyance. It will continue bothering you (not necessary painful) for several weeks. But the lumpy incision will likely not be painful - just have to watch that your bra doesn't rub it.
You likely will be restricted on how much you can lift (generally nothing heavier than a gallon of milk) for about 3 weeks. Try to not do much. Take it easy.
Keep asking. We'll be glad to answer
HUGS!!!
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Thanks ladies! It did not even occur to me that I would need a front closure, but it makes total sense. Can I ask why a size larger? Just for ease of putting it on? So sorry for all the questions. I feel a little overwhelmed. I went for my 40 year old baseline mammo and three weeks later had cancer.
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can someone tell me where I can find a board that discusses the medications taken after rads
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Tresjoli2, You don't want anything binding - believe me! You'll likely have lots of bandaging holding you in place and a larger size sports bra or Genie bra will be easier to maneuver over them.
Florida2015, There are quite a few boards discussing medications after rads. If you are pre-menopausal, you will likely be prescribed Tamoxifen. If you are post-menopausal, then Arimidex seems to be the AI (aromatase inhibitor) of choice. This link takes you to the Hormonal Therapy Discussion Groups listings Hormonal Therapy. Choose any or all of them. You might find the information in the Important Links forum helpful too. One thing to keep in mind on the hormonal forums is that many women have no problems with the drugs and then tend to not post. The women suffering from very real side effects do post a lot, looking for help in coping with them. You will likely not have any problems so think positive. I'm on the Arimidex forum and it's been very helpful and I have no side effects Arimidex Forum. Good luck.
HUGS!!!!
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I love your wisdom....thanks Peggy!
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thank u Peggy! The oncologists at MSK say the same thing. DONT go on the boards because they are mostly filled with complaining woman and not the ladies who have done well
But obviously the boards are also imformative And have positive ladies who are so helpful like you
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Florida, I'm not saying go on the boards. What I *AM* saying is: Your Mileage May Vary! Your experience may be very different. The women aren't complaining so much as looking for help in coping with the SEs that are really bad for them. There is a ton of good information here. Most of us WANT to stay on the AIs because they can do so much good for us.
My MO didn't tell me not to go to forums such as this one but reminded me not to EXPECT I'd have side effects when I asked about them. Since I'm normally a very positive person, this worked for me.
Good Constitution, you're welcome. I think that sometimes it is so hard to see which way to go when there are so many conflicting viewpoints. Always remember that it is YOUR body and you have to do what is right for YOU! What decision is going to give you peace and comfort? What is right for me, may not work at all for you. Keep reading all the articles here and see if any of them resonate with you. Mostly GOOD LUCK!!
HUGS!!!!
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Florida2015....I've been on Femara and so far no problems. Good luck to you !!
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Tresjoli you will be swollen, that's why the larger size, or at least a comfy sports bra, I didn't get a larger size, but brought my most soft comfy bra. It was back closure and I managed it fine, but I figured my husband was there if I needed help. Do you know if they are doing stitches or glue? My surgeon closed with glue and there was nothing put over the incisions, no bandage of any kind. Kind of freaked me out afterwards. I stuffed some gauze in my bra because I just couldn't accept there being nothing covering the wound. LOL
You will probably be fine to sit in a meeting a few days later, had mine on Friday and Monday I sat and did some computer work (I work from home though) and my right arm is my mouse arm which was my surgery side.
It is a long day. Several procedures before the actual surgery, but it goes by quick. I had to be at the hospital at 7:30am and my surgery was at 1pm. I left the hospital at 5:30pm.
Hang in there, it's a crazy rollercoaster for sure. I also had my first mammo at 41 and got the "call back" with the standard, we call 90% of first timers back since we have no baseline, nothing to worry about. Next thing you know...well you know. Officially dx on April 3, surgery on April 24, exactly 3 crazy weeks.
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Hi Ladies. I'm back.
Well, I got bad news yesterday. They say they found a tumor (1 mm) in one of my lymph nodes after the lumpectomy and sentinel. Wow! Didn't see that coming as all the pre-screening including the original lymph node biopsy showed all clear. Even the surgeon said that the lymph nodes had looked good so she was surprised. Anyway, that is not my question.
My fiance is not taking this well. He was so sure everything was going to be ok and it would be fast/over and done after radiation. But now I'm heading into triple cocktail chemo because the tests showed suspicious vascular something-a-ruther. Forget the term. Anyway, he wants me to get another pathologist opinion. The bottom line he won't verbalize but I know he is feeling is that he doesn't want me to go through the chemo side effects. His Dad died of couple of years ago after turning down chemo (stomach cancer) and I want to say "Do you want me to make the same bad decision?" but that is just too heartless to a man that thinks I walk on water.
Should I get another pathologist opinion and would that mean another sentinel extraction? I won;t do that with port implantation coming up too. My two biopsies were done by different labs. In fact I went with a different medical center because I was not happy with the center that did the biopsy and first pathology report. He even messed up my biopsy and 5 weeks later it continues to hemorrage on and off. So I found the best in the area and feel very comfortable with my surgeon and oncologist. How do I know if I should get a second opinion? I am now going to wonder through this whole thing which lab was wrong probably.
Besides that,.. any words of wisdom for settling Dave down? He wants to beat up the world - more specifically anyone that gave bad news, LOL Called my daughter and told her to move back home from cross country to be here with me (he thinks that would make me feel better - which it would - but I don't really want her to do), and is generally raging at the world. He is a very good man and usually is obnoxiously calm about things - does he just need time? Any best practices for this situation?
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Dyan, he is just scared shitless for you. It's out of his control and the memories of his father are overlaying it all.
If YOU are confident that the path report is accurate, do not subject yourself to another biopsy. And no matter what Dave says, YOU have to decide what will be done. If chemo is what is called for and you decide it is best, don't let him change your mind. Your attitude sounds very good and you're obviously a strong woman. You'll manage chemo, probably it will be hard but most say it is doable. We want to kill the damned cancer which makes most of it doable, doesn't it?
If you don't want your daughter moving back with you, tell her that. Maybe a visit when you first start chemo would be reassuring to all three of you. You probably don't need extra responsibilities while doing chemo.
I think that once you state precisely that THIS is what I am doing to get rid of MY CANCER and are firm about it, Dave will likely calm down. My DH looked at me like I was dead for several days until I told him that I am NOT dead and I'm not dying (he's an extremely pessimistic person) and that I wasn't going to allow him to go there, things improved. I told him I needed him to be positive for me. That I can't fight the cancer and him too. Maybe this line of reasoning could work for you. You need to jolt him out of the rut his mind has found so he can be the positive, supportive companion he normally is.
I'm sorry that your journey just got so challenging. Whatever decisions you make, don't look back. You decided with the best information you had at the time and that's that. Be positive!!!!
HUGS!!!
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Hi Peggy,You are so awesome!! I was reading what you wrote to Dyan and you are so informative and honest, it's great!! I was having second thoughts today regarding haven chose a lumpectomy over a mastectomy and you are right with what you said "Whatever decisions you make, don't look back. You decided with the best information you had at the time and that's that. Be positive!!!!" though that post wasn't for me, your words kicked me in the booty to stop second guessing myself !!
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6Doggies, I'm glad that I was able to help you. There are some advantages to being older - you've learned the hard way on somethings. And second-guessing yourself is one. Do stay positive. If you are still having chemo, you'll get through it. If you're done, then you survived it! Look forward. You have the rest of your life ahead of you! HUGS!!!!
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I think Peggy is our guardian angel. She continues to bless me by being here.
Dyan, I first thought was the same as Peggy's- he is scared. I'm sorry he isn't being more helpful/supportive for you. I hope he moves from shock and anger to acceptance soon. My docs told me to allow a year for this cancer journey... and they were right. It sounds like you moved to docs and facilities that you are comfortable, so I would rely on the most recent path report. I got bad news from my path report, but am so glad they detected the cancer cells that were lurking in my nodes. I did chemo. It was rough, but doable. Many women were able to work during chemo. I'm a stay at home mom, so my situation was different. Keep in mind, that some women are advised to have chemo even if their nodes are clear (depends on how aggressive their tumor is). I wanted to do everything I could to kick cancer out. So once I knew I would have to have chemo, I accepted it and moved forward. It is your choice and I wish you the best as you make your decisions.
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You are far too kind, PoppyK but thank you anyway. I'm glad that I'm able to bring some comfort and positivity to the rotten situation we find ourselves in. I know that I'd have done whatever my BS told me was best without question. I have complete faith in her. And she coordinates all my care. Very lucky that I fell into the perfect onc.
Poppy, you're absolutely right. Once you make a decision and accept it, move on and implement it.
Hopefully, Dyan, Dave will be able to do the same.
HUGS!!!
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Yipppeee....had my first water therapy yesterday and it was wonderful! Today I took a BIG step and actually mowed the lawn (wanted to get it done before the next 5 days of rain). I hate always asking my sons to come do it, they work and have families too. They have been so helpful, but at least now as small as it sounds (mowing the grass).....I CAN actually do!! See lots of new people here...sorry you are here but YES Peggy (I call her Positive Peggy) has been so helpful...never look back! Although I think everyone should get a second opinion.....
Mary
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FANTASTIC, Mary!!!! Way to go. You must feel like a new woman! BTW, I would never tell anyone not to get a second opinion. It certainly can be helpful. I'd had 2 different people diagnose my cancer so I had no doubts. What I think is also important is finding doctors you trust and who understand YOU! We're going to be with these oncologists for many years and need to be happy with them.
I'm so glad that whatever bits of wisdom I can share has been helpful. Seems I have found a new purpose here with this group. I was at rather loose ends after putting DH in the nursing home. Forty-eight years of being married, four years of intense caregiving and now living alone and needing to find myself. I'm glad it was this platform. I've derived so much help and comfort from the ladies there, I just hope I can repay it and pay it forward.
HUGS to you all!
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Peggy, this is you! After our meeting and all I have found a true friend with you. As you know I was a caregiver for my husband to until he passed unexpectedly 3 weeks before I was diagnosed with this Cancer! I know exactly what you are going thru and it just amazes me that you are so positive! I'd say deep down but it is on the surface with your husband in the nursing home, I think of you so often and just amazed how you can do all that you do and still give us all so much hope and HUGS!!! I wish them all back to you and please I am always here for you! Remember you!!! Love you tons, and yes here is where I found from you to get a second opinion and to feel good about who we are putting our lives into.
Mary
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Mary, I know you "get" what being a caregiver means. We're so glad to do it but it is tough. I think I'm so positive because DH was so pessimistic. I had to counteract that. Maybe I'm just crazy (that could very well be
). I also felt the connection when we met. Our journeys have been very similar. You're a good friend - almost makes having BC to have found you! Love you, too!Time to get back to my favorite anti-depressant - my book!
HUGS to you and thank you for making me feel so darned good!
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Oh great show on Dateline about Tom Brokaw and his cancer batlle
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I always forget about Dateline.
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Mary59G,
I also watched the show about Tom Brokaw. I had no idea he was struggling with this cancer nightmare also. I am glad he did the show, and let others know about the struggles of cancer. Also, showing that anyone can get this horrible disease. ♡
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Peggy and company.... first thank you for the ideas. After reading your post this morning; which was along the lines I was thinking but couldn't quite focus it out yet with the "What? Say that Again and leave out the chemo part and life changing comments Doc and I will feel so much better..." mind frame I was in for a day; I did a lot of thinking but not about Dave.
First, this team was my second opinion. I changed teams/ medical centers after the biopsy to a surgeon and oncologist that I trusted. Heck even Dave liked these two and he hated the first guy. (BTW - Dave has been to EVERY SINGLE APPOINTMENT with me since the mammogram. He gets lots of credit for that.) So when do I stop getting opinions and make the decision. Then I finally accepted something that has been bothering me since this started. I found the lump when I was checking for swollen lymph nodes. I had gone to the ER because my lymph nodes were swelling up everywhere, but mainly in my neck and armpits, and they couldn't figure out why. That has been in the back of my mind since the mammogram. So it sort of makes sense that they found a tumor in the nodes where they were swollen.
Next, as far as the treatments,of course I'm doing chemo. I'm going to do some research on the types, etc. before the final decision is made. Really what I am worried about is the Adriamycin possible side effects on my heart. I have a lot of heart disease in my family and I hate the idea of my heart weakening at all. So I talked with my Oncologist today and went over it with her. They were already scheduling the PET-CT and now adding an Echo and stress test prior to final decision on the cocktail.
I setup an appointment for Dave and I to meet with someone next Monday at the Cancer Center to go over things that are available for both the patient and the care taker. Think that will do him good.
I did finally accept that I don't want to lose my hair. I've been acting like it was nothing since I was diagnosed, but I have long long hair. I love my hair. Plus I had cranial aneurysm surgery 8 years ago and I hide A LOT of scars under this long hair - in fact they didn't shave my head because of hair was so long. I can't believe that I saved it from the shaver just for it to fall out. Darn! What is, is; but I will miss my long hair. So I thought of the best idea. I am going to have it cut off before treatment. I talked with a lady here in town that is getting me connected to a wig maker..... yep - I'm going to have a wig made from my own hair. That will be such a great story and give me a comfort feeling.
By 4:00 he was sounding better too. I think we both needed a little time away from each other for the day to just let it sink in. I then talked to him when I got home tonight. Told him where my head was, listened to him for a while, told him I want him involved with this but as Peggy said, it is my life and my decision. I need him to support me, not fight me. He got it. Then when I talked about the chemo, I did bring up his Dad's decision but with a lot of tact. That was his Dads decision, win or lose he made his own decisions. I am 25 years younger than Dave's Dad and have lots of years ahead of me - I'm not taking chances. I would rather go through hell in short term and have a long-term. And if possible not have to do it again later. We ended up in a good place. He's on board. Still worried but on board.
Thanks to everyone again for getting me headed in the right direction.
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