Lumpectomy Lounge....let's talk!
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Oh my gosh LaurieParr sorry you had to go through something like that!! I work in the medical field and that is totally discusting how he treated you. There has to be something you can do. I am without words...I could cry for you.
you are soooo right it doesnt matter no matter how small or what stage it is devastating and scary! Im so glad you said that it reminded me that we are all important and in this together.
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Laurie, I am devastated for you. No one deserves to be treated that way. You are definitely doing the right thing in writing and sending that letter to his office. Cancer is cancer is cancer. The way he belittled you and your "precancer" makes me want to scream and cry both at the same time. I'm so sorry.
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Laurie- I am so sorry that doctor treated you like that. I would have broke down right there in the office. You are a strong woman and have already been thru so much, you deserve only the best care!! I pray that you will be directed to a more compassionate doctor, that actually cares about what they are doing and how they affect patients lives.
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Thank you so much Miss Annette. I truly appreciate your kindness and validation. Thank you for taking the time to respond. I pray that you are doing well.
XOXOXOXOXO
Laurie
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Michelle, Steph, and Peace,
Thank you also for your words. You all understand that that means the world to me. Thank you for that gift.
XOXOXOXO
Laurie
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Oh Laurie - there are no words. Bravo to you and hubby for maintaining your cool and pulling out what you could from such a callus insensitive excuse for a MO.
I'm so sorry that your appointment went so wrong so very very wrong.
Please inform your BS ... BS may wish to consider long and hard before recommending K to another patient. Share you letter with BS.
If there's a support group at your BC center...someone may recommend a more competent MO with a caring manner. Shop around...for someone who is as vested in your future as you.
(((Hugs)))
Cindy
Give hubby a big hug...he stepped up and protected his girl...he did good!0 -
Miss Cindy,
I am on hold with the MO's office as we speak. The receptionist just asked me why I wanted to never see Dr. K again. I told her. She took a deep breath and said, "Give me a minute to think of who I can give you that will fit you better. I'm so very sorry."
Thank you for advising me to inform my BS. I was pondering that. I will copy the letter to him today. He is such an angel, I know he would want to know about this.
I thanked my husband and hugged and kissed him. I told him that I didn't know what I would do without him.
Big hugs to you Cindy....:)
XOXOXOXXOXO
Laurie
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Laurie...absolutely unbelievable how you were treated. I am impressed how you handled the situation. You are helping out the next patient by sharing your experience with your BS and his office. If you are not comfortable with the next MO you meet with then meet another. I had 2 opinions ...fortunately liked them both. I know our "stats" are not the same but we are all going through the same processes to learn what our best options are to make the right decisions. Stay strong!!
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Dear Elkatho,
thank you so much for your note. That was precisely my point with him. I told him no matter what stage my cancer, I still have to go through all the procedures including two surgeries. That is why I was so exasperated. I don't know if the letter will resonate with him personally, but if there is a small chance that it will, and it will help someone else, then is totally worth it to me. Thank you for all your love and support. I truly appreciate your friendship. Have a blessed and wonderful day.0 -
I have to admit to skimming over most of this thread - just got my diagnosis today and after inital relief at the wait being over, I am definitely feeling a bit shell-shocked now so all the posts I was reading were making me cry.
I've only seen my GYN so far (BS and Onc next week) and she said that in the best case, they will do a lumpectomy followed by radiation - that decision is obviously a long way off.
The thing is, I have a nearly 2cm lump which the GYN says will require a 2cm margin around it, but it is sitting right under my nipple, so that will have to go too. Has anyone else had experience of this? Can anyone give me any ideas of what might lie ahead?
I know they say "a little knowledge is a dangerous thing" but I'm leaning towards "forewarned is forearmed".
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Oh Laurie!! What a first class JERK! I thought MY 1st MO was bad... jeez, he was a peach compared to what you had to deal with. Glad you are letting his office know what you had to deal with. I "fired" my 1st MO and guess what... a few months later he was no longer with the group. Apparently I wasn't the only patient who thought he was an @ss. Maybe you will prevent someone else from having to deal with such an insensitive... @#*%! (Fill in your own description there ladies.)
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And another thing! If DCIS isn't cancer, then what the heck does the C stand for?
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OK, I don't know if this is the right place to ask this, but here goes. I had a lumpectomy last April followed by the standard course of rads. Breast-wise my skin is soft, has the resquisite big dent in it, a lighter areaola, and is smaller than the left, though I've seen pics of much worse. I'm considering reconstsruction, but I'm torn between having more surgeries and possible complications and living with my breast as is. My DH is great and doesn't care, but I'm torn. I know we are all different, but I wonder if the surgery(ies) are really worth it, or if I will regret the surgery like I regret the rads. Anyone have any thoughts they care to share?
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No,no,no, you dont have to take that...my surgeon,suggested a chemo Dr.that he had talked to about me.Went for an appointment,did not care for him at all,went back to surgeon,and he said if we didnt like this other one ,he would get one we liked ...you will get one that you like!!!!
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Lehela.
So sorry for your 'bad news'. My tumor also was about 2 cm. but located at the 6:00 position. My BS told my husband (after the initial surgery) that he removed tissue about the size between a golf ball and tennis ball. He wanted to be sure that he got all margins. That breast is somewhat smaller than the other one, but better than the alternative of still having the tumor in or a total mastectomy.
I too agree that is is better to be forearmed. I know how you are feeling, been there done that, this journey is scary but we are STRONG and somehow find the strength to get through it. I am glad you found us here, I have found that the other gals have been a GREAT ENCOURAGEMENT!!..
Please keep us posted as to your progress. WE DO CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER>>>>
We are each pulling for you.Vickie
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Hi Lumpies
Lehela - Welcome, so glad that you found us, but so sorry you must join us. We are a great lump of strong brave warriors...a place to share, encourage, vent, cry, and laugh.
Breathe, you will be fine. Hearing those words rocks our world...this is a great site...read...soak it in and breathe.
Waiting is the hardest:( but you can use the wait to your advantage.
Visit your BC Cancer Center, gather info on BS, PS, MO, RO, find out what services are provided, is there a support group if so go and listen and speak with the ladies...it eases the unknown. Find an appointment buddy to be your ears and backup:) make your list of questions and ask BS to show you pics of what outcome may look like. Ask ask ask.
Setup a file with your records, journal your feelings, choose the best BC team possible!
Then breathe, blow some bubbles, get your hair&medi/pedi done, make a few fun video clips that make you laugh and then breath!
Do not run ahead...no need to rehearse something that may ever happen! Stay focus on today! Grateful for today:)
You will be fine brave warrior! Sending calm confident thoughts and prayers.
(((Hugs)))
Cindy0 -
Cindy,
GREAT ADVICE FOR Lehela and any other newbie to the site.,..
Vickie
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Mini, I'm not sure this advice will apply to you, but I'll do my best to give you my opinion. I had my lumpectomy in June 2012, followed by radiation and am on hormone therapy now. Maybe it's because I didn't have time the time you've had, but I never even considered reconstruction. My left breast was smaller than my right, and I did have a big indentation in it. However, I still looked pretty good in a swimsuit. I could not see the indentation by looking down. The indentation was below the nipple. Of course, I could see it in the mirror, but it was more of a battle star than anything else. I just did not feel the need for reconstruction.
All that said, I did choose to do reconstruction after my mastectomy this year. I am sharing with you because I think it's important for you to know that the plastic surgeon was concerned about doing the reconstruction on the radiated breast. Everything turned out fine, but you want to make sure that your breast is truly ready for reconstruction before going through all the effort.
Good luck with your decision!0 -
Thanks Steph01 - I don't look bad in clothes, it's more when I look down and see it. I've seen pics of much worse. I know it's more mind over matter. I have just about decided that I will leave well enough alone for now. God forbid I have a recurrence, but if I do, I will likely just do it then if I still feel the need. When I think about the LE risks and other possible complications, I think I will leave well enough alone.
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Leleha - there's a great post Dec14,2013 by Bessie on DCIS thread double mx vs lumpectomy which is very helpful in working thought issues.
When you put together your team...see BS, PS, RO, and MO and have your questions!
Ask questions...ask for pics...make sure you are at peace with how you wish to proceed...it's very personal. But you will know after you ave et with each key team member what is right for you.
Now breathe...you will be fine.
Cindy0 -
Lehela,
Sorry you have to join us. It is possible that you will lose your nipple if the lump is close to it. It's not that they could not avoid it in the surgery, but more that it may contain cancer if too close. My tumor was pressing against my nipple. Had a surgical biopsy with no margins taken and they went back in to take margins and the nipple. Getting it reconstructed in a couple of weeks after nearly two years from first surgery. This is a long journey you are starting. We are here for you.
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Lehala, so sorry you have to join us here. I also had a tumor (1.7cm) that was almost directly under my nipple in the 11:30 position. In my case, they opted to do oncoplastic surgery along with the lumpectomy, which allowed them to completely remove my nipple and then go straight down and take out a huge chunk of tissue and then re-attach my nipple as a free skin graft afterwards. They then did the same thing on the other side so they'll match (trying to make the whole thing look nice, cosmetically, in the process--it basically looks like I've had a lift and reduction). I'm not sure where you live or what's available to you, but you might ask to see if there's a Plastic Surgeon that could also be involved in your surgery. Even if not, though, the most important thing is to remove the cancer. There are lots of women on the boards here who've gotten reconstruction later if that's what they choose to do. Big {{{hugs}}} to you as you go through this.
LaurieParr - How infuriating just READING about your experience! Wow. You did the right thing!
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Hey Nyama - good to hear from you. Have you finished rads? Hope all went well and skin is recovering to peaches and cream. Yeah, the cool breezes of the OR Coast. Portland OR was my home...luv the coast:)
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Thank you everyone! And Chell, thank you so much for your words as well. I totally appreciate it. I loved what you said about DCIS. You ladies rock! Love you all.
Have a blessed day!
XOXO
Laurie0 -
Thanks so much to everyone for the warm welcome. Although I have no doubt that you all know how appreciated it is! *hugs*
I'm still researching everything I can and checking on all your advice and tips - the list of questions for my doctors next week is as long as my arm, but I know it's my right to ask them and you have given me a lot to think about and ask about but, most importantly, the courage to do it. I usually just nod and go along with what doctors say, but not this time!
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Lahela,
You go girl...We are behind you!!!!!
{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}
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Lahela...keep the list going and whenever in doubt you can get a second opinion. All the doctors should welcome this. Thinking of you.
Sharing......half way done with chemo!!!!0 -
No chemo for me, yay! Just found out!!
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Great news Steph!
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Elkatho - yeah! half way done with chemo! Hang in there brave warrior we are in your pocket ...over the hump
Steph - yippee! a final plan of attack. Rest and heal ...prep your skin for rads...emu oil worked great for me.
Happy Birthday USA!!!0
