Lumpectomy Lounge....let's talk!
Comments
-
Molly, you have had a rough couple years (longer than that I'm sure). You are one strong woman and I admire the way you have handled all the curve balls life has thrown at you.
HUGS!
0 -
Thank you, Peggy. I feel the same about you.
0 -
You're too kind, Molly. Thank you.
HUGS!
0 -
Molly, as Peter Himmelmann (Dylan’s SIL) said in a song about a friend of his, “you are a woman with the strength of 10,000 men."
0 -
Amen to that!
HUGS!
0 -
Have been off line. Some time-sensitive things came up at work unexpectedly.Have been in some pain.Fell on my bad knee yesterday and having trouble figuring out way to move that leg without trigger problems.Will see doctor soon.
Judy, So sorry for your loss of two brothers in a short time.May you find comfort.Poodles, glad that your mother is now in a good setting.It's been a rough time.Molly, hang in there. Finding inspiration from how folks juggle all the curve balls. Sending good wishes to all.
Question about LE pain: What does the LE pain typically feel like?? Some folks have described a "pulling" pain.I'm having severe pain in my upper arm. I wonder if I pulled a muscle?I'm 3 weeks post SNB but with only 2 nodes so I'm assuming that my pain is not likely from the node removal!
0 -
Oh, foo. Last time I was down to see my mother she gave her beloved hammered dulcimer to me to take to my musician son. She was so happy that he wanted it. So I packed it up and brought it to Atlanta. Well, last night she told my sister she wants her to bring the dulcimer over. WTF?
Well, it looks like I'm going to have to ship this blasted thing back to her. And it probably weighs at least 30 pounds. It's about three and a half feet long and custom made from mahogany. This is going to cost me probably a couple hundred dollars to insure this stupid thing.
Maybe I should have known better, but she was completely lucid when she gave the dulcimer to me. My sister is going to break the news to her today, I think. After which I'm sure I will be back in the doghouse.
0 -
ChiSandy.... I have never been told that! Now I have to look her up! She must really be a babe. LOL!
0 -
Happy Wednesday, ladies! I have lots of news. First - my DH and I had a spectacular weekend in Colorado, celebrating our grandson's 1st birthday. He's such a personable little boy - reveled in being oohed and aahed over by all sorts of strangers at his party (which was really a barbecue for the adults). There were about five little ones there and they all got along splendidly! I also had a great visit with my daughter and son-in-law.
I decided to go back to my fitness classes today. This morning was strength training; the instructor watched me like a hawk, making sure I didn't do anything she thought I shouldn't. Boy, did it feel good to get back to class. Although I can easily raise my right arm above my head, I was careful not to do so. I could tell it had been a month since I had exercised!
My oncologist appointments are finally happening. I have an appointment next Tuesday with the MO and hope to have an appointment with the RO on Monday (her office has been talking with the insurance company daily - my surgeon's office just called the insurance company to check on the delay). I'll be very glad to meet these two doctors and map out a plan. According to my surgeon, I will be having radiation. He made no mention of chemo and, from what I've read, I don't think it's called for in my case. But the surgeon also mentioned hormonal therapy; from what many have written here, I think that will come after the radiation.
I thought of you this morning, PontiacPeggy. When I wrote that I had had four surgical biopsies, you pointed out that a lumpectomy is a different animal as it's major surgery (and don't I know that now!). Well, I saw a woman at class this morning who didn't know why I had been absent. When I said I had breast cancer, her first question was, "What stage?" When I said Stage 1, she sort of poo-pooed it as being inconsequential. Then she went on to say she had had a lumpectomy years ago but it was benign - in other words, she had a surgical biopsy. I just smiled and went on my way!
This forum is such a joy - I stumbled upon it quite by accident and am so glad I did!
MJ
0 -
Poodles, just when I thought your mom-drama was over. Argh. I would just keep the dulcimer. I don't think it is worth sending it to her. But that's me.
MJ, no, most people don't get that having a lumpectomy is real surgery and just because it's Stage 1 doesn't make it less BC. Most people are ignorant and thoughtless rather than being mean. Doesn't help much though, does it? Glad your plan is getting in place!
HUGS!
0 -
~MJ~
I had the same experience with a friend at work. She didn't understand what I was so worried about. She had had a lumpectomy 20 years before and it was no big deal. She went back to work two days later; she didn't need radiation or chemo. I was puzzled because I had two surgical biopsies and returned to work after two days for each, but not with the surgery. So I asked her about her experience and discovered she had not had a lumpectomy, she had had a surgical biopsy. Sometimes people don't understand the difference. I agree with you & Peggy: a lumpectomy is major surgery, but I have heard it referred to as an excisional biopsy and that may confuse people.
0 -
It is frustrating to be told that lumpectomy is not a big deal, especially when people confuse it with excisional biopsies, which require less cutting and less anesthesia. I suspect that some people feel better if they think your situation is not so bad and they don't need to worry.
I'm experiencing a different "twist" on that.I'm lucky that so far test results are favorable and do not show lymph involvement.There are others in my circle of friends getting test results that are more unsettling.I'm also in an environment where there are many whose cancer was discovered at a much later stage and who've gone through or are going through a lot more.In comparison, I feel that my situation doesn't qualify as "authentic." I feel obligated to say "all's fine" and to minimize it because others are contending with so much more.
In some cases, there are some BC survivors who went through a lot more and who reach out and offer support even knowing that through dumb luck my cancer just happened to be discovered at an early stage. Last night, someone who's going through chemo now for a recurrence, called to see how I'm doing. She said I was supportive when she went through treatment some time ago.I really appreciate their empathy and their understanding that stage 1 *is* still a big deal, and still can involve lifelong changes; including for some, years of hormone therapy (with potential side effects). In this forum, I posted about the experience of hearing two BC survivors comparing notes and one belittled the experience of the other, who had DCIS. Lately, I've been feeling that because my IDC was caught early, I am belittling my own experience.Not sure how to come to terms and "own" this.I also feel that I am taking too much of my care providers' time asking so many questions about my situation, which is minor in comparison. So far, reading others in this forum is helping me gain a sense of perspective, which I really appreciate.
0 -
Sandy, thank you! Do any of you subscribe (free) to Conquer Magazine? Great issue and lots of information on survivorship.
https://conquer-magazine.com/category/survivorship/0 -
Blooming, take as much of your care provider's time as you need. You owe it to yourself to take care of YOU. Let others handle their own appointments. I suppose you are right that your (and mine) BC is not as dire as some others. But it is still BC and needs to be treated and taken care of. So don't feel guilty. Take all the time you need at your appointments. And don't apologize because your BC was discovered early. Just be thankful and supportive of those whose BC was found at a later stage and be thankful for your friend who thinks of you even when she's going through chemo.
HUGS!
0 -
I've worked around computers for years and learned to take the apart and upgrade them... and have had a friend tell me she needed a new computer cause her hard drive was bad... she thought the tower was the hard drive... had to show her that the hard drive was one of the things inside the tower and it could be replaced, and I fixed it for her... seems like that's the difference between the lumpectomy and biopsy...
Poodles, It could be she will forget about the dulcimer as soon as she remembered it... I wouldn't worry about sending it back, unless it's something you feel you need to do... when my brother was alive, he would want something or want to go somewhere, and then forget just as fast...it can change so fast... Praying for you... this will happen, unfortunately..
0 -
Update: I just made an appointment with the RO my surgeon wanted me to see. So I see her on Monday and the MO on Tuesday. I can't say enough about the staff at these doctors' offices. When I talked to the woman at the RO, she said she had been calling the insurance company daily, looking for the authorization. Moments later my surgeon's office checked in with me; that woman called the medical director of the insurance company to find out what was taking so long (actually it's only been two weeks). I'm excited to meet these doctors and get this next step going.
Blooming - our situations (which sound very similar) are what they are - breast cancer! Yes, we're fortunate ours was caught early. I feel badly for those men and women whose disease is further advanced and therefore harder to treat. But, in the end, we're all in this together. A male friend just called to check on me; he was overjoyed with my good news of clear margins and negative news. Said it was the best news he had heard in a long time. His reaction definitely brought a smile to my face!
IHGJAnn49 - I like your computer analogy!
MJ
0 -
Blooming: I've been feeling the same way and end up downplaying what I'm going through because it is stage I and was caught early. But it's still a big deal and has derailed plans and is scary and anxiety-provoking and the outcome is unknown. Glad to know I'm not the only one feeling this way.
0 -
~blooming~
Instead of going through my whole thing, let me just say this: My BC was so small the biopsies got it. The surgery was to clear the margins, but it was still a big deal for me. So, my sentiments match Peggy, IHGJAnn, Tappermom, SJI & KB. Ask questions and don't feel guilty because you caught your BC early. I am so glad mine was caught early.
0 -
Blooming, I think when people hear "lumpectomy" they think it's just as simple as taking out a lump, sewing you up, and sending you on your way, all cured up. "Excisional biopsy" sounds so much more ominous, don't you think. The average person doesn't know what it is. Heck, I've been a nurse for 40 years and before I was diagnosed with BC I knew almost nothing about all this stuff. I had lumpectomy, followed by re-excision, followed by chemo, followed by BMX. I'm always surprised when women, in particular, say "well, you can live without breasts. At least you're ALIVE." Which is true, but I still wish I had my nice, big breasts back.
Peggy, I consulted with my sisters, one of which is a professional musician, and decision has been made to not ship the dulcimer. Mother has a smaller one at the apt that she used to travel with, so sister is going to take that one over to the assisted living. Her room fairly large, but it's already packed with her queen size bed, bedside tables, full size sofa, recliner, flat screen TV and stand, roll-top desk, cat box and cat bed. I don't know where the heck she's going to put this dulcimer. I can already see her catching the walker on the corner of it. If she decides that she wants the big dulcimer back, well, she'll get it whenever I can get back down there--in July, probably.
0 -
Tappermom, so glad you've got your appts scheduled and will soon have your plan.
Blooming, I felt the same way. I was initially diagnosed with DCIS and felt guilty compared to everyone else, but I was still scared because to me it was BC and I was very thankful it was caught early. Then when they did my LX they found a small spot of IDC in the pathology and I was even more scared, now it's invasive, I didn't care that it was tiny, all I heard was invasive part. But again, caught early, so still very thankful. That set me too worrying what else is there that they didn't catch. That's why I'm going through all the recommended treatments. Trying to lessen the chance of reoccurrence. That's something we all live with. Hugs!
0 -
Poodles, having watched my mother fail with senile dementia without all the medical complications your Mom has, I'd say, don't try to ship to dulcimer back, especially as she has a smaller one. Sadly, just like she doesn't remember she told you to take it to her grandson, she won't remember she doesn't have it.
Sounds like a lovely place she is in. My Mom just had a room. They did make her get dressed and go to the dining room for each meal, something which we encouraged too.
We bought LTC for me shortly before my 60th birthday after an older friend had a significant stroke. Her DH was able to afford the help he needed to keep her at home for over 5 years, but it was a warning to us. Fortunately, the cost of it hasn't gone up in 11 years even though what it would cost for care certainly has. I'm not even certain I could get it now as the last 10 years have presented me with several health challenges, including brain surgery.
Second dose of Hercepin alone comes Friday. Went in for my blood work and saw my RO for a check-up today. I'd like the thing the worse is over but who knows. RO told me today that insurance would only pay for mammogram on one breast. I was surprised as BS had said bilateral every six months. What has been your experience?
0 -
Yeah, Taco. I wish we had gotten LTC insurance for DH. He started getting sick with sarcoidosis when he was 47. Sarcoidosis usually isn't all that serious--most people don't require treatment, or if they do, they have a few courses of steroids and within 2 years it's over. But in a small percentage sarcoidosis becomes a progressively invasive disease, which is what happened to DH. Unfortunately, it disqualified him for LTC. He has been fully disabled since 2007 and we both really hope that he never needs to go to assisted living or a nursing home, because it would wipe us out. After he got so sick, I had the opportunity to get LTC insurance for myself and I JUMPED at the chance.
0 -
Blooming - I've wondered how to handle certain comments also. In my case recently when sharing with a friend that had recently had a bilateral. I got the impression my "lucky" status of very early BC was disturbing to a friend that recently had a bilateral. Her follow-up conversations with me had a tinge of why me. I have found myself not so comfortable talking about myself and try to keep the conversation more on her.
I have been fortunate to not find anyone that has minimalized my BC. But I do hate seeing others questioning their own, particularly with such recent treatment.
0 -
You know - my surgery authorization was for a partial mastectomy, not a lumpectomy. If we called it that, it might make more of an impression!
MJ
0 -
Tapper, that’s exactly what my LE specialist calls it.
0 -
Good morning ladies i hope you are feeling a little bit well. I got 2 appointments for next week, one with the Dr for Radiation and the other hematologist oncology i guess for chemo. My question is for those with lumpectomy and only radiation you went to see both for the first time to discuss your options or after the surgery the surgeon suggested right away the Dr of Radiation? I am confused. Help!
0 -
Hi Vivian,
I had an appointment with the medical oncologist two weeks after surgery and an appointment with the radiation oncologist 3.5 weeks after surgery. The medical oncologist appt was set up before we knew the pathology results so yes, it was to discuss options but it was a very short appointment once it turned out my nodes were clear. I don't need chemo and I am er/pr negative so that was my only appointment with the MO. It was still useful because I had questions about going back on birth control (she said no) and other risk factors for recurrence. I also wanted to know if there was any chance I didn't need radiation but the surgeon, MO, and RO all said I should.
0 -
Vivian, I had a similar situation as Law193. Appointments were made prior to having pathology report. I met with surgeon and oncologist the same day. Surgeon spoke at length and oncologist was more of a meet and greet, very short.
And oncologist set up another appt. after what he considered would be after my surgery date (which is still undetermined as surgeon wanted MRI) Oncologist said he will not be involved with brachytherapy(internal radiation) but will get involved with med hormone medication thereafter.
Hope this helps.
0 -
I had appointments with both my MO and my RO before surgery. When it looked like I wouldn't need chemo, the MO was going to handle the endocrine therapy (because my tumors were ER/PR+) and the RO was going to handle radiation. Now the MO will handle chemo and endocrine therapy.
0 -
Just to chime in: I'm among those who feel guilt and tend to downplay feeling about BC because mine was also minuscule and with excellent prognosis. And I can live in deep denial very easily.
Seems like my friends initially took it much more seriously than I did but when I tell them about the indicators of good prognosis, they then tend to file it away and go on to other things. But I think it's going to have to be a reality for me for the rest of my life and I MUST do whatever I can. Hoping for the best and optimistic, but trying still to be realistic.
0
