BCO Memorial Day—Remembering So Many Women Who Mattered
Over the last week or so I’ve been thinking about a “BCO Memorial Day.” Various people came to mind, accompanied by memories of how they shared themselves through their posts and how their posts had an impact on me. One of the many things I remembered: Chickadee and I agreed that we all want to know that we matter, that we make a difference by being who we are and living our lives. Here are some of the women who made a difference in my life—and maybe yours, too. Please feel free to add other people and your memories as well.
AlaskaDeb Shortly after I was diagnosed with mets (’09), I came across this wild at heart spirit with a wacky sense of humor—a woman who reminded me that I could rely on my own twisted and at times dark sense of humor to get me through some rough times.
Analemma Her screen name means “the pattern the sun or a planet makes as it goes around a spacious object.” She also said, “I get a kick out of how some people think I'm calling it Anal Emma.” I admired her smarts and her wit.
Konakat Ah, the infamous Konakat. Who could forget “When in doubt, eat cake. When you haven't a clue, add ice cream”? And Dr. McDreamy? So much life packed into that woman! I miss her irreverence!
Ma111 A thoughtful woman who had the courage to start the death and dying thread, just to say the least.
Apple Apple! I really miss her and her stories—my goodness, her stories! She shared so much of her wit and creativity, her love for music and Mr. Apple and her children, her home and paintings (remember her photos?), her connection to animals and nature.
Sheff Now, I know Sheff often lurked and didn’t post much. But I remember when she wrote, “I may look back on this post in (hopefully) many years when I am not doing so great, and I will remember that I still had joyful and happy days despite this disease.”
Alesta29 Laurie’s motto: “Stay in the present and live each day as it comes.” Her wonderful humor, her stories about being a nurse and mother and wife, her colorful use of language, her love of music and how it helped her to feel free in spite of unrelenting assaults from cancer—all I still treasure.
Soleil Her signature added, “And I think to myself, what a wonderful world!” She often wrote about choice, choice being a good thing, and her choice to live as long as she could. What an authentic, open person.
1athena1 “Anyone diagnosed with cancer should learn to have a healthy disrespect for statistics. Statistics are maths. It's the science which still eludes us.” I remember how she thought coping with bipolar disorder helped her in learning how to cope with cancer. I could relate to that, because my lessons from living in cancerworld helped me to learn how to live with yet one more serious illness.
Frapp I remember most her kindness. She wrote, “Once you get over the heartache you will find a way to move forward and live.”
SPAMgirl I will never forget her last topic/post: “I’m here” Just seven days later, she died. There is more to her legacy than that, but today that particularly resonates with me.
LuvRVing Who can forget that bunny suit in Michelle’s photo? And that smile? Her love of food and RV’ing? I wonder: did she ever get to take a maiden voyage when they finally bought an RV? Her reminder: “Be kind to one another!”
OBXK What a wonderful smile. Her last post: I don't plan to check out anytime in the immediate future …still shining with her spirit.
Chickadee “We all want to know that we mattered and things we did in our life mattered......to someone. Maybe we aren't famous or infamous, but here and there we had an impact.” Oh, yes, she had an impact. And I loved her signature line, “I'm in such bad shape, I'm wearing prescription underwear." (Phyllis Diller)
MartyMart “I'm most likely one of the unlucky half who will fall on the short side of the survival median.” A tough woman who dealt with one blow after another after another throughout her life with cancer. She was so much more than that, of course, and that’s one of the reasons it’s so hard to lose people to cancer.
SAMayoFL A fellow dog lover. She said, “It is amazing to me that I worked on a Monday and Tuesday, went to the hospital on Friday and in hospice on Sunday. I have gone through every range of emotion: mad, sad, pissed off, raving lunatic, believing I am going to die if I sleep tonight to being determined to stay just to prove my onc is a flipping quack.” I wish she had been able to prove her onc was a flipping quack.
Anacortesgirl I am so glad, for Christy and her family, that her last Mother’s Day was a good one. Now there was a woman who loved her family! She was smart, funny, and compassionate. I still hope her “transformation” brought her an awareness of infinity.
Capriness Ah, Teri—more than a woman facing the end of her life who brought so many of us together, more than an artist and an animal lover. She had a kick ass personality and rebel spirit, and she was NOT going to let anyone else tell her how to live her life.