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August 2015 Chemo Group

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Comments

  • KateB79
    KateB79 Member Posts: 555

    superius, WorryWart again, huh? Did he say anything to you yet?

  • Melclarity
    Melclarity Member Posts: 387

    Superius - it's sure hard to hear such news of others, just have to remember how different everyone is, and each situation. After my dx 4yrs ago I did rads and tamoxifen and moved on, I never looked back or worried of recurrence. Yes it happened to me but its unpredictable but am glad I didn't spend my life worrying because I would have lost the time. It's super hard of course I say keep enjoying life.

  • superius
    superius Member Posts: 310

    Kate: He threw an innuendo last week. So he was sick last week (sneezing & everything). & of course the doctors in the choir told me to stay away from him. After choir rehearsal, we (just us 2) were putting away music in the cabinets (in a much smaller room); when we left, (he was walking in front of me), he said, "no kissing tonight." WOW what? What the Hack! There were no one else around to hear that, I don't know why he threw out the innuendo/ joke like that... If he wanted to see what my reaction might be, sorry man, you have to really spell it out for me, I am THAT clueless.

    & No, I haven't knock him on the head.

    Melclarity: WorryWart is a friend of mine, who wasn't dealing too well with my chemo (hence the nickname) & who had been acting weird last summer during chemo...


  • Melclarity
    Melclarity Member Posts: 387

    Ohhh sorry Superius LOL, I got the wrong end of the stick!!!

  • MsBrompton
    MsBrompton Member Posts: 324

    I really think someone should pen a cartoon picture of WorryWart. We've all got one in our lives...


  • KateB79
    KateB79 Member Posts: 555

    WorryWart definitely deserves to be cartooned. Maybe I'll include someone like him in my next installment!

  • exercise_guru
    exercise_guru Member Posts: 333

    You gals are so awesome. I love love love the Cartoon.

    MsBrompton have you rode your bike? Its very sweet and you deserve it!

    Carolyn So so so relieved for you.

    So it looks like I am going to be shaving my legs before I get a haircut.... Somethings in life are so unfair.

  • deeratz
    deeratz Member Posts: 318
    Well I did it. Survived Nashville! The Madonna concert was amazing. I am pretty much exhausted as we were up late every night. We walked, danced and danced and danced some more. I would have a hard time partying for a week straight before cancer. Well I managed to do it as a survivor! Rocked my short hair and lived life. It was great to get away with my girlfriends who have been there for me through this whole ordeal. I couldn't have survived the cancer shitshow without them. I was a bit sad that my bestfriend of 31 years wasn't with us. She ditched me 2 weeks after my first chemo when I invited her to my head saving party. She said it was to hard for her......uhm well it was super easy for me. A breeze really to chop your breasts off and then be poisoned for several months. No hair was the best time of my life.....NOT! Too bad that cancer ended that friendship. Not sure that it can ever be repaired, and if it is it will never be the same again. So glad for my gals who stepped up and carried me thru!

    Superius-sorry to hear your news.

    Molliefish and Kate-sending the hair fairy your way. It is a painful process. Growing it out is not going to be fun. My whole head is covered with hair but I still have a long way to go!
  • KateB79
    KateB79 Member Posts: 555

    DeeRatz, it's good to hear from you, and I'm thrilled that you had such a good time!

    My longest friendship (20+ years) has definitely taken a beating from all of this, too. It's as if all she ever wants to talk about is cancer, cancer treatments, and her own medical problems. I mean, jeez, there's more to life than doctors, you know? It's weird how things work. I still haven't decided what, if anything, to do about it.

    I had my radiation sim this morning and got to see my own scans. Wowza, the body is a cool machine--especially when it works properly. They've assured me that they'll miss my heart with the beams, so I start on 2/4. After going back and forth and back and forth, I figure, at this point, I'm all in.

  • deeratz
    deeratz Member Posts: 318

    image


    My party crew. I was the last to shower everyday and the first one ready to go out. Short hair has its advantages for sure

  • SoCalGrl
    SoCalGrl Member Posts: 59

    exercise_guru - Having to shave my legs and armpits again has been a bummer! The baby smooth legs and pits were nice while they lasted.

    Dee - Madonna sounded like a blast! I'm glad you went and had a great time. I'm sorry to hear about your friend's reaction. That's really tough.

    My hair is growing in. It still seems slow, but I'm happy with the results so far. My hair is A LOT darker than it was originally, and it feels baby soft on top. I lost quite a bit of eyebrows after my hair started growing in, and oddly enough my eyebrows have grown back to better than what they were before chemo.

  • deeratz
    deeratz Member Posts: 318

    image

    So happy to have hair....

  • KateB79
    KateB79 Member Posts: 555

    DeeRatz, you're my hair role model.

    SoCalGirl, my eyebrows are almost gone (8 weeks PFC), but they feel stubbly now, like they're starting to come back. Fingers crossed. . .

  • Hazel_Nut
    Hazel_Nut Member Posts: 70

    HI DeeRatz, I'm jealous...you have so much more hair than I do lol and I'm just right behind you PFC wise.


  • Birdysmom
    Birdysmom Member Posts: 39

    Glad to read that many of you are seeing some hair growth. You guys look so good! I still have nothing but fine stubble (got rid of the Mohawk; it started getting straggly). No hair growing back anywhere yet and am getting worried. Will I look like a jolly bald Buddha for the rest of my days?? Rub my belly for luck? I sure gained enough chub for it!

    Loved Kate's drawing, would love to see more! Nice to see that creative mojo kicking back in:-). For those getting Herceptin, does it make your skin blotchy and itchy for the first day? (Am discussing that with doc) I just had my first Herceptin-alone infusion yesterday and had that skin reaction, but hadn't had such a problem during chemo.

    I think there's a thread about this drug... I'll start digging...

  • VickiRides
    VickiRides Member Posts: 163

    DeeRatz - Your hair looks wonderful, and I love the picture of your party crew. Beautiful ladies, every one of you.

    I had my sim for radiation last Monday. Very easy, but I was surprised at how much the tattoo needle hurt. I am (was) a tattoo virgin, but I want to get something cool when this is all finished. I won't start radiation until the end of February because we have a trip planned mid month. The RO said the delay is no problem (my MO freaked out a bit when I told him how long I was waiting to start).

    I couldn't stand my grandpa hair anymore (bald on top, scraggly on the sides and back) so I had my daughter buzz my head so everything is the same length. I am starting to see some growth along the hairline if I look really close, so I am hoping it will start to grow in evenly now.

  • deeratz
    deeratz Member Posts: 318

    Vickirides-I buzzed mine all off too. I had so much white fuzz growing when it started and then the darker hair coming. It was so uneven. So I did buzz it off and I was really glad I did because it grew in nicer. I need to get it cut again as I have many longer white hairs sticking out. I am having to glue them down with hair pomade. I will probably get it done next week. Want one more week of growth.

    I don't want to dye my hair but I feel 55 instead of 45. I dont like the grey hair. My friend is a hairdresser and she said you can get a shampoo that is tinted. I am going to try it. If I could get it a bit darker I would be happy. Just don't want to deal with having to dye roots

  • molliefish
    molliefish Member Posts: 650

    Today I ran into an old acquaintance from one of my last assigned locations. She said 'oh, did you do cops for cancer' I said no. I didn't feel bad for me but for her. I didn't have the heart to say 'no, I had cancer'. what bathe hell do I do Now??

  • KateB79
    KateB79 Member Posts: 555

    Anyone else gonna get tattoos when treatments are over? Vicki, I'm with you. I'm planning mine, at least sort of, with the goal of getting it done over the summer. I'm thinking a half-sleeve, but we'll see. . . .

    molliefish, that's one of those things, isn't it? When a well-meaning person says something that would make absolute sense six months ago, but now causes conflicting emotions? Who you tell about your experiences is your business. I get where you're coming from: one of my colleagues asked, completely innocently, what I did over winter break. Instead of telling him that I recovered from chemo and had my other boob lopped off, I just left that part out and told him about the holidays. We were at a dinner meeting, and I just didn't want to get into it, you know? The long and the short of it is that you don't have to do anything now. If you want folks to know, then you'll tell them; if they find out from someone else, that's none of your concern. Easy to say, I know. . .

    Happy weekend, all!

  • Mamiya
    Mamiya Member Posts: 151

    Hi ho, the user formerly known as Notdoneyet here, changed my screen name to maybe lose a jinx, I would like to finish all of these treatments at some point ;) Chemo failed for me and I am now about to start a two year clinical trial and one of the questions I emailed to the study coordinator was indeed, "can I get tattoos?" I really want to.

  • deeratz
    deeratz Member Posts: 318

    Molliefish-I like to think of myself as a survivor now. Don't know if it is too early to call myself that yet or not. I did survive surgery and chemo. I now just have to survive my exchange surgery and I will be done. It's up to you who you tell but that may be a better term for you. I also have to survive my 5 years of Tamoxifen which doesn't seem to be causing me any severe side effects.

    Kate-I too would like a tattoo. My first ones will be my nipples. Then I will get another one of some sort. My Nashville crew want to get one as well with me. So we will have to figure it out.

    Mamiya-Sorry to hear about your failed chemo and skin mets. Your are doing a clinical trial, but do you also have to have more surgery

  • VickiRides
    VickiRides Member Posts: 163

    Mamayi - I am so sorry that chemo failed. I hope the new screen name brings a better outcome -- I've done similar things to break bad mojo and I believe it works!

  • Tam-iam
    Tam-iam Member Posts: 55

    Mamiya - So sorry the chemo failed. Good luck with the clinical trial. Sending good thoughts your way!

    I'm having my sim for rads today and starting treatments on Monday. I'm hoping all of us doing rads have an easy time of it. I'm feeling a little bad attitude about it, like some of you describe, but I think that's just about being tired of all this. I do feel optimistic about rads going well. Sounds like most people get through with minimal issues.

    Have any of you stopped taking Prilosec or stool softeners since ending chemo? I waited a few weeks per the suggestion from MO to stop Prilosec, but had issues. Now I'm doing half a pill per day, but even that isn't enough to be able to handle spicy foods. I'm wondering if it took some of you a while to be able to stop taking it or if you had to ween yourself off slowly. Same issue with the stool softeners. Can't seem to stay regular without them, so I'm thinking about trying to take them every other day for a while to see what happens.

    No tattoo for me, but I totally see why some of you want one. I'm not a tattoo person to start and if I got one, it would feel like it was a concession to cancer. It's weird because when I hear about someone else getting one after cancer, I think it is cool and I totally get wanting to have one. It kinda seems like snubbing cancer or declaring you're a survivor. But for me, it feels like I would be giving control to cancer. My sister will be disappointed. She thinks I should get one. I'll definitely be looking forward to seeing what you ladies get for tattoos, though.

  • MsBrompton
    MsBrompton Member Posts: 324

    ooh, hair, yummy! Well done those growing back.

    NO I have not ridden my Brompton except for around the park because my right knee has a torn meniscus. How unlucky is that? But I don't care - it's a "sports injury" hence it's very cool. And I have told my mother, who knows nothing about the breast cancer, and she's told the whole church so my knee is being prayed for.

    A do love a good irony....

  • Bluefrog76
    Bluefrog76 Member Posts: 250

    I tried stopping Prilosec and got really sick, so am continuing on that and for me, Imodium, which I need for the Perjeta.

  • superius
    superius Member Posts: 310

    MsBrompton, that's a funny story about your knee!

    About whom to tell... seriously right? I think I mentioned it before, my mom use cancer card to get out of bunch of family obligations & that's how my aunts & uncles found out. So I have cousin (we didn't grow up together) who I see a handful of times per year. Suddenly she's like, oh we miss you, we want to come see you (she's 2 hrs away), we hope you are doing ok, we will always be here.... & then she sent flowers, & cards like every couple weeks. There was a family gathering after Christmas that only my sister went, & I was told that "she was really sad you are not here & she was tearing up, send her an email." (what? to console her?) Couple weeks ago, my dad said she dropped by at the house when I was at work, because "she's in the area for work & wanted to see me, & she was very sad I wasn't home". Next month, her daughter's 2yo birthday "I hope you would be up to it, we want to see you so badly" -- yeah driving 2 hr to a Chucky Cheese kinda party doesn't sound fun to me, even if I'm 'up to it' or free (I'm actually very busy that weekend).

    No tattoo for me. I don't even have my ears pierced. But I am getting a charm bracelet, with things that were important during active treatment. http://www.preciousaccents.com/ I found this site because I was actually looking for a donut charm, & they have a very nice one. & there's story behind that, too: so few years ago a choir friend gave me a funny t-shirt that says "organist powered by [pic or 2 donuts]. WorryWart proclaimed, "that's not funny!" (i don't care for donuts, he was the one having them between service - he's the organist). Fast forward to Chemo, I t sent a picture of me wearing it & a skull cap with music motive, telling my choir I'm bringing my people to chemo session, & suddenly it was "I love your t-shirt!" <roll eyes>

  • Mamiya
    Mamiya Member Posts: 151

    DeeRatz, I haven't had any surgery yet, hoping for a good response in the trial and then surgery. IBC you have to do chemo first and now that I have skin mets that has to be cleared up because if not it will just get stitched in to the scar and come roaring back.

    Tam-tam, I already have a few tattoos so I won't feel like I am giving anything to cancer, but I see how that could work if you didn't already have any and you did it "because" cancer. Tattoos for me are kind of a documentation of life events so that is how I am seeing it for me.

    I'm not overly superstitious but I did wear my lucky earrings (that were an anniversary gift from my husband last year) to the appointment when I did not get awful terrible news so I may be becoming more superstitious by the day now...

  • MsBrompton
    MsBrompton Member Posts: 324

    Interesting, superius. I think some people whom we didn't originally tell about our BC now feel cheated because they missed out on the outpouring of emotional guff that would have made them feel that they were helping. But of course, that's precisely why we didn't tell them!! I'm telling a lot of people at work and getting similar (well, not quite as bad) responses. Like "let's go for lunch". Hey, you never wanted to go for lunch with me before! I'm keeping my barriers up. Doing just fine without your support, thanks, person-I-hardly-know.

    Herceptin number 9 (of 18) for me today. I am now an "expert patient" so I get to give it to myself. It's in the fridge in a bag with "do not eat" written on it :-).

    Tattoos? Eventually. I've heard the nurses really like doing these - it's like an art project for them.

    Hang in there, ladies on rads. Following your progress!


  • Mamiya
    Mamiya Member Posts: 151

    About the who to tell question. I've told a bunch of people but NOT told another bunch. The ones I have told have access to a secret FB page where I post updates. I don't want them to feel betrayed if things go badly, as I did when two of my friends died last year and I had no idea that they were even sick. I was sad that they died but just as sad that they didn't consider me important enough to share anything with while they were ill (both were in far away states so I didn't see them in person - Army buddies who were much closer in the past than just buddies, they truly were friends, one was more than that).

  • Tam-iam
    Tam-iam Member Posts: 55

    Thanks, Rachel. I'll just keep on taking half a tab for now and take a whole tablet when I know I'm going to eat something spicy. Maybe I'll try stopping in another month or so.

    It's hard to know who to tell. I've told my closest family and friends, but there are just some that I don't want to know. Not so much because I want it to be a secret, but because I don't want to hear from them for the first time in twenty years.