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Starting Chemo in July 2017

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  • runnermum
    runnermum Member Posts: 346

    Hi ladies. I haven't been around much...been reading but a hard time keeping up on here and not feeling up to replying. We lost our sister in law this past week. It was a hard hard week. I truly hate cancer and I am emotionally exhausted. Not only was she my sister in law but also my friend. We did so much together and I miss her so much. Even though we had very different diagnoses, I wanted her to beat this beast too. I had a lot of hope. She had a lot of fight. It is so hard. Fuck cancer.

    Have Taxol #7 this week and then 1 left. Hard to believe in a little over 2 wks chemo will be done. I am ready for rads, ready to move on.

    Thinking of all...good to see everyone keeps moving in the right direction towards the finish line. You all remain in my prayers...


  • proudtospin
    proudtospin Member Posts: 4,671

    ok, dumbo here went to coast with a pal and had nice lunch, ordered lobster bisque, can you say too rich for my tummy? Not a good choice

    Good thing i was with a pal

    Ii need to through my stubborn head that my system can not handle certain foods anymore

  • Teese
    Teese Member Posts: 355

    runnermum, I'm so so sorry, thank you for taking a moment to post and let us know. What an awful week and I wish I had words to help, but I have nothing. I don't know how you feel either as I've lost loved ones to cancer but not while I'm in the the fight. Prayers said for your family.

    Paulette, I've had bloody nose if I blow it but not a nose bleed. I bet it has something to do with the awful air quality you're dealing with and the Taxol together. . I'm so sorry, I'm sure your sick of it. I find that when SE are manageable I'm so much better mood wise and when they get me down I then have my mood plummet. I'm sure we all feel that way, it annoys me that I can't get myself out of a funk quickly or sometimes at all. I have to wait for a good day to roll around. Sigh.

    I'm really counting on rads being easier for us all and better days. After all it will be the holidays and we deserve some fun with family and friends.

    Speaking of holidays, with Thanksgiving coming up anyone making plans? My sister will be coming up and bringing the dinner. I'm supplying the ham and turkey (my hubby deep fries it, turkey not ham ;-)) and she's doing the rest. I'm so grateful for her company and help.

    Proud, oh pooh, sounded like such a nice lunch, hope the tummy settles quickly.

    Hugs and prayers

    Theresa

  • proudtospin
    proudtospin Member Posts: 4,671
    • tesse, yeap i chucked my lunch in a what i hope was a dignified fashion, tummy fine now, brain is annoyed as i should know better
  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Sorry ladies, I’m in foul moods today, should be my good day, with the four hours sleep plus constant nosebleed on and off for hours got me depressed.

    Runnermum cancer sucks!!! I’m so mad about all the pink ribbon stuffs gave people wrong impression.

    I haven’t thought about thanksgiving at all, my sister in law is fighting cancer now, she just told me she might started her chemo end of this month. Two cancer fighters in the family, not sure what would happen then.


  • Teese
    Teese Member Posts: 355

    Paulette, I can only imagine how crummy you feel. I'm quite fatigued today but no nosebleeds, I think they would drive me nuts. Is this the first time you've gotten them or is it every infusion. Plus it stinks that this is your supposed good day. The only thing I can offer is every infusion is different and hopefully this is a bad one and the one coming up is going to be better. Hang in, just offered prayers for you to feel better.

    You are right about the pink ribbon stuff, I had a neighbor, who is a nurse, tell me when she heard I had breast cancer, how lucky I was because it's not really a serious cancer. I just stared at her, I had nothing in response to that!

    Ok, so there's this thread called slices of joy and I check in there every day. The gal who started did so to post the little things that bring joy into her life. It's a fun thread and you may like it. Anywho, I thought I'd end each post with a little thing that brings me some joy.

    In college my hubby and I were normal students, studied last minute and wrote papers at the last second. We were the worst procrastinators. The worst, I would clean out my cats litter box to delay homework. Anyway, the thing that brings me joy is my daughter is the complete opposite of us, we don't know where she came from and we plan to keep our dirty secrets from her, at least until she graduates this spring. She has no idea what bums we were. 😂 Makes me smile

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Teese, so glad you are here with us! I have to read some bible scripts to give myself strength today. The taxol train ride is not easy and I’m not even half way there already in the gutter.

    Thanks for the story, no matter what bums were you, she will love you.

    Hope everyone have better day than I do

  • JenRuns
    JenRuns Member Posts: 299

    hang in there, Paulette. Swings up and down are to be expected... it doesn't mean the remaining Taxol weeks will be just as bad.

    Runnermum, sending healing thoughts as you mourn you sister-in-law.

    Hope everyone has a good week... now that my son is done with marching band, things are a little calmer. No real plans for the week, thankfully! My daughter has her Homecoming dance next weekend, and that's about it. Here's wishing for easy SEs for everyone

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Jen - I keep my head up, I can’t let it drop too low. Cried enough already for one day. How many daughter do you have? I remember I saw a picture of 9 years old girl, is she having Homecoming dance??

  • JenRuns
    JenRuns Member Posts: 299

    I have a 16-year-old daughter and 13-year-old son :)

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Jen - I don’t know why I thought you have a younger daughter.

    Good morning everyone, I had such a bad day yesterday, I even got nausea from taxol. That’s something new to me, I didn’t experience this with AC. I slept good 8hours last night, I hope today will be a better day. Thank you for all the supports.

  • Teese
    Teese Member Posts: 355

    Paulette, glad you had a good night and that will surely make you feel better. Hopefully the air quality has improved too as the news today was better out of California. However I'm sure it depends on the wind direction and where you are in relation. I'm thinking that plays a part in how irritated your nasal passages were yesterday.

    I'm running errands today with DH, it gets me moving and I walk extra aisles in the stores to up my step count, more interesting than the dreadmill. Plus we'll stop for lunch and I might need to drop by Yankee Candle to see what's new. Yup, I think I may need a little autumn candle plate and shade duo, then a stop by the wild bird store.

    I'm a backyard birder. Will be starting the Project Feeder Watch Nov 11th. Have done it for a few years and I'm thinking I'll have a little more time to devote to it this year. I love my song birds and the fall migration of birds. Yup, somehow I turned into my parents.Shocked

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Hi Teese , I can't believed what happened to me yesterday I was down in the gutter emotionally then I got nausea in the evening. Today I will pick myself up and we are going for my dermatologist appointment.

    I used to have bird feeder in my backyard I got blue jay and dove visited, then the dog got too excited so we stopped. Now we only have hummingbird feeder.

    Next year hum I need to think about what to do next year. We should live to our fullness each day as soon as we finished our treatment.

  • JenRuns
    JenRuns Member Posts: 299

    Ugh. Had an appointment with a plastic surgeon today to consider a DIEP Flap... I was planning to do just regular implants, but heard the failure rate is high with implants post-radiation. And since I have plenty of abdominal tissue to "donate," why not consider it. Bottom line is that I'll do that procedure, but now I have to wait almost a year after radiation to schedule the first surgery, then it's another 3 months after that for the second one (the "tweaking"). That puts me at January 2019 for surgery and spring for the second one. Two full years from diagnosis. So completely and totally bummed out at that. Not to mention the thought of carrying around these expanders for another year. (My "Tijuana boob job" as the nurse today phrased it ... that cracked me up.)

    On the up side, I'll get a tummy tuck. And the procedure has a 99% success rate (vs the 40% failure rate on implants). *sigh*

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Jen I didn't know the procedure can be that long and lengthy. You are young you should go ahead to complete this procedure with your tummy tuck.

    Anyone has Stomach Gas issue with taxol? I took Zantac the other night my face turned red, never happened before. I guess I need to pick up something else for my indigestion.

  • travelhound
    travelhound Member Posts: 63
    Sunnyjay- re letting extraneous people know about the cancer. I really did not want it be become public knowledge. I think it makes people awkward, and they don't know what to say. Even a couple of my close friends struggled with how to act. I have many facebook friends from high school and I go to reunions every 2 or 3 years. The last thing I wanted is for those folks to look at me with pity, or to avoid contact because they didn't know what to say.

    JenRuns Tijuana boob job!!!! LOL I need to develop a sense of humor about my hated expander. Perhaps that will help. I had not heard that implants have a 40% fail rate. That is bad.

    Paulette, do you have a humidifier? That may help with the nose bleeds. All our tissues are so dry and that is irritating to our nasal passages. re gas. I have lots of the other kind of gas, and I'm getting acid stomach in the middle of the night.

    Runner so so sorry about your friend/SIL. Thanks for checking in. I can only imagine all you must be going through.

    Tesse- whoa your nurse neighbor! Some people just stick their foot in it. Also..It is good we take the best from our parents. For example, I am listening to classical music right now. Thanks, mom. Tho she never taught me to like birds. I did that on my own. You are lucky in the midwest, you have more of a variety of back yard birds. I just have finches and jays and starlings.
  • Teese
    Teese Member Posts: 355

    Paulette, I take the zophran for three days after Taxol only because I'm prone to nausea. However it sets me up for killer constipation and all that goes with it. My GI system hasn't been even close to normal since the beginning of chemo. So I have had gas at times. I'm sick of taking meds for stuff so I tend to ride it out.

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Travel, I have my humidifier working since last week, it helps out a lot. I didn’t have stomach gas until this week, not sure is from taxol or the steroid?

    Teese - I didn’t have nausea problem during AC but I do with taxol, today is my day 4 to be safe I even took a zorfan. That will set me up for constipation also. I’m so tired of taking meds also, you are going to reach to the end of the rainbow soon. I still have 7 more weeks to go. 🙁🙁🙁🙁


  • JenRuns
    JenRuns Member Posts: 299

    learned something new at my MO appointment today... saw the NP for the first time. I asked for a refill on my Ativan. She asked about why I use it and such. Apparently it's habit forming. I had no idea. And frankly, that concerns me a bit. She suggested a Benadryl on non-steroid nights, and only using the Ativan on infusion and post-infusion dates. (Unlike Tylenol PM or other OTC sleep aids, Benadryl won't impact my liver panel or other levels they're watching.)

    So... Benadryl tonight. Will try taking it an hour before bed to see if it helps.

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Jen - Ativan will only allow you to refill once a month, now I ask for 1 mg but I usually take .5 mg each time. So I just cut that up so I can have extra. My MO wouldn't give me trouble for refill, just tell them you have anxiety, you need Ativan to calm down. Unfortunately I need Ativan since I have nausea problem now.

    To be honest, Ativan doesn't help me sleep, I need to take Ativan and 3 mg melatonin together

  • Teese
    Teese Member Posts: 355

    Jen, your appt with the PS was informative for us all. I knew a D flap would be more involved than the implants but wasn't aware of the time involved. However I agree with Paulette, go for it.

    I took a lot of Ativan during AC for nausea, no one told me it was addictive! Good grief. I only use it on my steroid nights now if I wake up and can't get back to sleep. I'll be careful, thanks.

    Paulette, well, since gas is such a problem and meds cause just as many problems maybe your diet can be tweaked a little. I think as you've written many times this chemo is doing a number on our bodies in so many ways, and what used to be no problem eating may be giving you some gas now. So think about what fresh produce your eating that may be reacting differently now and causing gas.

    I know proudtospin found that lobster bisque did a number on her this weekend and not before. Hope it's something simple like no more broccoli.

    Travel, actually I'm from the east, VA, but we do have a nice variety of birds and more so in the spring and fall during the migration. I love feeding them and watching what they're up to. But I love animals, so i end up feeding the squirrels, planting the right flowers and shrubs for butterflies and hummingbirds. I used to put out salt licks for the deer until they started treating my garden as their salad bowl. Had to draw the line. We live on the edge of a large wooded area and see all manner of critters.

    Hugs and prayers,

    Theresa

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Teese - I need to plan better on my meals.... need to do so,e research now,

    Regarding Ativan, I spoke to my MO before because I worried became habit. I used to fight to take that, but he told me .5 mg is such a low dosage and it is a short period of time during chemo it would be okay. I take melatonin for sleeping, it actually works better than Ativan.

    I would be so happy that I can work on my garden next year. I got deers from the canyon to my street, they eat up roses and plants, so we have to plant things they don’t like.

  • JenRuns
    JenRuns Member Posts: 299

    Those who are taking melatonin, how much do you take? Any particular brand? (Oh, and my Ativan is 1mg.

  • runnermum
    runnermum Member Posts: 346

    Thanks all for the kind words. I feel a little better today...it's sunny beautiful fall day. I got a few things accomplished too!

    Jen...your Tijuana boob job comment made me laugh! I have heard the ativan is habit forming too so have never asked for a prescription. Like all of your my sleep sucks right now. Damn hot flashes. I don't like taking meds and would rather suffer then get hooked on sleeping pills. When I am done with chemo I am going to look to see what natural products are out there. I have opposite effect with Benadryl, it makes me wired.

    Paulette...glad your day is better today too! I need to get my humidifier running too!

    Teese...I hope you had a good day!!

    Hi Travelhound!


  • runnermum
    runnermum Member Posts: 346

    Jen...our melatonin is 3mg. I have heard to try half that to see if that works. If not take 3mg. It will help you fall asleep but not necessarily help you stay asleep.

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Jen, I take 3 mg melatonin it also comes in 5 mg.

    Runnermum - glad to know you’re doing better now, one day at a time, we just have to keep moving forward.

  • sunnyjay
    sunnyjay Member Posts: 143

    Runnermum: I'm so sorry to hear about your SIL. I'm sure she was glad to have you around during her last days. I hear you on the hot flashes and night sweats. I would end up putting an ice pack behind my neck.

    JenRuns: I had to inquire about D-flap since I also have a lot of tissue to "donate" as well. My PS didn't give me much detail at first so when I asked about it, she convinced me to consider D flap as a last resort in case there are problems with the implants. That made sense to me, since I know someone that tried implants but her body rejected it, so she ended up doing D-flap. If there were problems with the d-flap, there may not be another option. At least that's what I was led to believe. If my PS was more encouraging about it, I would totally consider it also.

    For those on Ativan, my oncology & infusion nurses both said it was not habit-forming. I only took it to counteract the steroid, so I was only using it for Days 1-3 and only before bed. But I don't know if it did anything other than make me drowsy. I still would wake up in the middle of the night and couldn't go back to sleep right away. I hated taking all these pills, but it would only be for the first few days and I guess it helped manage the side effects. I also get heartburn before going to bed and just take Tums. Also, ginger lozenges helped me with any feelings of indigestion.

    I took Benadryl last night for allergies and it knocked me out, and I actually ended up sleeping in this morning. i just can't take it often because of my hypertension.

  • sunnyjay
    sunnyjay Member Posts: 143

    I found this article from this site about who rads is recommended for: http://www.breastcancer.org/treatment/radiation/wh...

    I do fall into the "gray area" with my tumor at 4 cm (recommended was 5 cm or greater) and with one or more lymph nodes affected (I had one). I have been reading through other threads about those who were on the fence, and there were some that said their risk of recurrence only improves by 20% and they didn't feel that was high enough. Then someone mentioned that there is a 1 in 8 chance (12%) of women getting BC and yet here we are... so that totally put things in perspective for me. Why would I risk a 20% chance of recurrence when I had a 12% chance of getting bc in the first place? I haven't met with my RO yet, so I don't know what my % recurrence is without rads. but if it's more than 12% I think it's a no-brainer..

  • PauletteK
    PauletteK Member Posts: 1,279

    Sunny are you going to have radiation? Talk to your MO so you can get that figure out.

  • Teese
    Teese Member Posts: 355

    Well, the lady came with my pump today. Very easy to use and she had me wear it for 35 min to make sure it worked etc, my arm decreased from btwn .5 to 1cm, so I'm very pleased. For those using one, how often do you use it? She said I should shoot for three times a day for 60 min each session. Seems like a lot of sitting, I'll work it out somehow.

    Gorgeous outside today, sunny and upper 50's, Woot, I love fall. I'll walk this afternoon around the neighborhood and then I've taken steaks out to grill tonight. We try to use the grill as much as possible now because once it's cold we don't like to sit out there anymore. I'm definitely a fair weather griller.

    Jen, how are the ribs?

    Paulette, feeling any better today?

    sunnyjay, thanks for the article, I read a few things that I wasn't aware of. Good luck when you meet your RO. I'm hoping you won't need rads, but if you do, I feel it's well tolerated by almost everyone. It's just not without SE.

    Runnermum, glad you're doing well. You and your family remain in my thoughts and prayers.

    Travel, how is your hgb doing, do you still think you'll need transfusion? How many infusions do you have left?

    Purplestargazer, not sure if your still following, but congrats on finishing chemo!!!! Yay!!!!

    Leatherette, did you try the cognac? Just dying to know!

    Proud, hope you enjoying your off week, and I hope the air is good.

    We have so many California gals, hoping your all out of harms way and not choking on smoke. Prayers and hugs.

    Theresa