Chemo starting October 2017
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oh goodness no, I'm not that clever. Found these on the internet
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My friend sent me three of these - two that are really lightweight and a purple, plaid one that's heavier. They are my favorite headcoverings now. I can adjust how long or short I want them and I don't think they look too "cancer-y". More like I'm going to go clean a house. LOL For someone handy, they probably wouldn't be hard to make.
Here's me wearing the gray one. My girls took me to lunch at the beginning of December. We were supposed to go to an Ugly Sweater Walk at the hospital in the nearby town where they all live and I taught (we all worked at the school). The walk raised money for a 3D mammography machine. (They called themselves "Sara's Sleigh Belles" in my honor - they were all supposed to put it on their sweaters in iron on letters, but only one did.) We all registered and paid our money, but we decided that we wouldn't be able to talk and really "hang out" at the walk. Too many people would try and talk to us! So we went to the Cheesecake Factory instead! LOL
Anyway, I highly recommend these as lightweight and comfortable head coverings. I'm totally not comfortable going bald. I think I look like either Darth Vader with his helmet off or current Billy Joel! So these are quick, easy, lightweight, and comfortable. (Hopefully, it's not too blurry. My eyes are screwed up the last few days and I can barely see clearly!)
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scaligirl...omg, love your red hat 🎩 and lips 👄 I cracked up.
Thanks for the birthday wishes Agatha!
Happy Birthday eight...hope you have an awesome day.
Jennifer, hope your hubby is ok.
Lisa...hope you feel better soon.
DKK, it may be too late, not sure, but paint your toes, use a strengthening polish. May help those itty pittys.
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Happy Birthday Jennifer, Sara, KimCee and Eight! I would say I am sick and tired of the roller coaster of emotions. This weekend I was down and out. Slept all day Sat. and Sun. Monday felt so so with my emotions going wild. Then had Taxol #3 today and feel fine since being pumped up with all the steroids. So the cycle goes the next three days will feel good then will fall apart over the weekend. Start over again. 9 more cycles. 🙏
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Thank you Trilady. Oh the steroid high, hate it! I have not slept well in 10 weeks, two more stinken Taxol. I moved to Florida two years ago from NJ. I lived in Bergen County all my life. Did my treatment at Hackensack, are you from that area? Hope Taxol gets easier for ya.
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Scaligirl, I could tell you were the one in the front!
Agatha, wear your baldness proudly! I'm not as brave as you, but I think it'll only have to grow out an inch or so before I ditch the caps. Wigs aren't for me, either.
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Hi KimCee- I grew up in Monmouth County but now live in Burlington County so now a South Jersey girl. My neighborhood is mostly horse farms although I am one of the few houses without any. But I love to visit them when I walk my dog. I decided to go into Philly for care to get treatment from a NCI center. It's worth it to drive for the care. Good luck with the rest of your treatments!
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Today I find myself growing weary of the battle. I have such a long way to go.
I had my fifth weekly Taxol today- seven to go. I'm under nurses watch with Oxygen tank, BP monitor, a bell to ring, and reaction antidote at the ready. They have doubled my steroids and benidryl and have slowed the drip to TWO hours for the Taxol infusion - all to avoid another reaction. Plus every third week, I am getting perjeta and Herceptin in addition to the Taxol. Geez, I may as well just move in.
I have seven appointments in this first 15 days of January - chemos, onco checks, angiogram CT scan, heart MRI, Cardiologist. All this while trying to hold down a high stress job. I got home from chemo at 4:00 this afternoon and put in 8 hours of work - which was no problem because I am so pumped up on steroids I won't sleep until Thursday and then the dreaded crash will come.
I look like Uncle Fester (from the Adams family for you young-uns). Totally bald, NO eyebrows, and about 7 eyelashes. I've lost 30 pounds, my skin is hanging on my body, dark circles under my eyes, fingernails turning black and I look like I've aged 10 years in the last 3 1/2 months, and I move like an old lady due to light headedness and shortness of breath. I'm 64 years old and was planning retirement. I promise you, this was NOT a part of my plan. I felt and lived like a forty year old before my GP found this surprise at my annual exam in Sept.
I know I should be grateful that I have such a wonderful care team. I love them. But as it stands right now, my care plan goes through December of 2018 with chemo, surgery, reconstruction maybe, maybe not too soon to tell, radiation then Herceptin through the end of this year. Sucks to be me.
Then I come here and get the insight and support of you wonderful, strong women and it brings me back to the proper mindset. Your tips, experiences, humor, and pain really touch me. Everyone of you have helped me in some way. I know I've got this. And this too shall pass.
I thank each and everyone of you for being here.
Michelle
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Michelle, I so admire the fact that you're working through this. In fact, cheers to all you ladies who are holding jobs and/or taking care of young kids and/or doing this chemo thing without a support network. This is not a treatment plan for the weak or the wimpy! And we're doing it. So take that, cancer!
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No no prepares my for the hot flashes and night sweats of chemopause. I had to flip pillowcases twice last night and turn my ceiling fan on. Is this what menopause is like?? 😳😳🔥
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Sara,
Hot flashes go hand in hand with perimenopause. Once you actually get to menopause (1+ year of no periods), it's much easier. I was nearly done with the hot flashes when I was diagnosed. Now I'm remembering how much those hot flashes stank.
Today I met with my NP and MO. They both felt around pretty good and neither could feel the area that the sub-NP was poking around at last week (and declared to be around 2cm long, which caused me to panic). However, because I'm worried, I'm scheduled to have a mammogram with US on Monday. Woot!
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Lisa, glad your getting a US for peace of mind. I know I want to see with my own eyes. Having someone feel doesn't do much for my confidence.
Chemopause sucks! Went through being hot and cold the last few days and especially nights. I ran to the store on the 1st. It was 22 out in place that is usually in the 50's this time of year. Told my husband, bet I was the only person out there driving around with my window half down (cause I was overheated).
I have noticed my fingernails are looking yellow and my eyebrows are thinning. Really nailing that uncle fester look!!!
When at urgent care with my husband yesterday. The nurses say they are getting slammed with flu cases since the week before Christmas. My husband was there for 3 1/2 hours before being seen for his back. It has made me a little more worried about being out and about. And renewed my extra long and frequent hand washing/and anti bacterial product use.
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I know what you mean about germs, Jennifer. We went to Urgent Care on 12/31 and I used the Purell when I arrived and before I left because I was paranoid about the germs. Today during my infusion, I wore a mask to protect my fellow cancer patients from being infected with the green-goop plague I picked up. Thank goodness because I had a few really awful coughing jags from a "tickle" on the back of my throat. Egads.
42 more days of chemo!
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I attempted a mini clean of my house today. Took down tree. Cleaned bathrooms. Changed my bed. Currently beached on the couch. Doxetaxel is no joke. Stil not feeling myself 6 days out of chemo. I like the chemo countdown. 36 days left for me
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Hot flashes are awful. I'm constantly rolling the window down in cars, ducking outside for fresh (20 degree) air, etc. For the night time ones I have been using a CHILLOW - it's a thin gel pad you put in freezer before bedtime and then slip into your pillowcase for sleeping. It really helps me.
Lisa - congrats on the ultrasound. I know you've been wanting one. I hope it confirms that the tumor disappeared. I am not able to locate my tumor any more. I'll see what my MO says when I get my physical exam before chemo on Friday. They aren't going to do the official post-chemo imaging until 2 weeks after my last infusion, so that that last dose has time to do its thing.
16 more days until last infusion infusion for me!
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I love that we are all seeing the end. Anyone here have their healthy breast removed? I had my mast in September but need to start making arrangements if I want to have the other side removed after Rads. Insights welcome
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Bald is warrior beautiful be proud and strong that you are rocking treatment. You are survivor show off the proof if you need to lol (hot flash in public)
Happy birthday to all that had one. Started Herceptin today. Went well. But now cold n hot lol trying to be happy chemo is done. I can start tomixifin now as well. Waiting few days to see what Herceptin does to me
Ouchie those toes look painful hope it gets better 4 you
Thinking of you all
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Sara, I'd ask my MO or surgeon for local (contained to the breast) recurrence rates for your tumor type before I made the decision. If it's really low, then I might consider leaving it be. Of course, you also have to ask yourself if you'll be able to live with the threat of recurrence, even if it's low.
My tumor type is known to be aggressive, but from what I'm reading the local recurrence rate is no different than other tumors. So at this point, I'm leaning towards a lumpectomy with radiation because if metastasis is the bigger threat, removing my healthy breast isn't actually going to help much. In fact, it may even hurt me because mastectomy is a much bigger recovery for one's body than a lumpectomy.
Of course, I change my mind every day, so who knows what I'll eventually decide. Hopefully you'll be able to get some good, recent data to help make up your mind, though.
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Lisa, those are good points. I had not considered the tax on my body of having my healthy breast removed. I’m currently happy with my uni. I guess I certainly have more thinking to do
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My birthday Saskatoon pie and ice cream. Hello 43 🍰0 -
Well, happy birthday! That looks delicious!
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Happy New Year ladies! Here's to a new year filled with new promises, inner strength we never knew we had, paying our experiences forward and spreading love & joy like wildfire!!
And Happy Birthday to soooo many of you! It's quite uncanny how many January birthdays we are celebrating! We Celebrate You!! 🎉
So many things, I don't know where to start-- so forgive me if I just remember the details and not the person who posted-- like the cutie finger pics-- adorbs!! Put a smile on my face! Some of you gals mentioned fevers while on Taxol.... please be careful! I know that fever is the one thing my docs have been coo coo about at each of my checkups-- fever? Fever? Fever? And with all the germs circulating everyone really must be careful. I wore a mask and a disposable glove on my right hand when I went to the hospital for my checkup yesterday-- the glove is so I use my right hand for all the touching of doors, handles, pens, chairs, etc. and allows me to keep my left hand cleaner to touch my personal things like phone, purse and keys in between washing my hands. Call me a crazy germaphobe, but I can remember back in the mid-80s when it was cool to wear a glove on one hand-- anyone remember that? I even wore a fingerless Madonna-style glove for some time! LOL!
I totally empathize with the hot flashes! Not drenching my pillow yet, but we turn heat down to upper 50s at night --so probably keeping my head cooler. All the heat is so drying to me....my eyes keep twitching and I have a tissue full of blood every time I blow my nose. Been using saline spray in nose which is helping.
Sara-- Always ❤️ Your pics! Did the docs tell you it is necessary to move forward after rads with the prophylactic side? These choices are tough and very personal. I just wrote a long post in the forum Going Flat with No Reconstruction about how I made my choice of surgery....you can click on my bio and find it and read if you wish along with insight from other women. Would you choose to reconstruct? Didn't know if that was part of why you looking to move forward sooner than later with 2nd breast-- because you were getting ready to reconstruct the other and figured to do both at same time. Please ask any questions you may have or debating. And Lisa is right about getting your medical facts all on the table first, then personal emotions can be added. Lisa-- what is your ER status since it is not listed in your bio. You mention aggressive form of BC.
I have my 5th out of 6 CT treatments on 1/9 and I cannot wait to get it over and have only 1 left!! This looming in the middle of treatment has been not fun-- plays all sorts of mind tricks on me. I love the chemo countdown especially since we are all approaching the end of this part of our journies! I hope everyone continues to post together here through rads and beyond!
Love to you all!! 26 days to go!
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I love seeing you ladies with less than 30 days to go! Makes me so happy for you! I am at 75 days.
And so many happy birthdays! Next year our birthday will be so much sweeter.
I have been starting to think about my double mastectomy coming up, 3 weeks after last chemo. I have mentioned before that I chose a double and it was recommended by MO and BS. Based on age, triple negative and multiple "probably benign" issues (in both breasts) shown on MRI (like cyst). I have calcifications in my "good" right breast that I have been getting mammograms every 6 months. I was told they are probably benign and stable but never biopsied. If I was thinking a lumpectomy or to keep the breast, I would have had to biopsed them before I started chemo and I wanted to start chemo ASAP when diagnosed. And honestly, I don't have great breasts. 17 months of breastfeeding (at 40/41) left them pretty droopy and saggy.
I have noticed with the 3 week cycle of paxitaxol I am on, about day 8 after chemo I start to feel better and able to do normal activities. But I still don't have the stamina, like before chemo. I don't sleep as well, even taking 1 ativan at night. But when I take ativan I dream and not about cancer or anything negative. I wake up content. I don't have any neuropathy (knock on wood) and most SE don't last long.
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i went flat. Took the healthy breast... Turned out there was large cyst that could have caused issues later so was very happy with my choice to remove healthy breast. Not to mention my breasts were painful most of the time. I was un huggable during my cycle do to pain. Sooo happy they are gone. No more bras for me. Happy n proud to be flat.
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MamaFelice, I fixed my profile so that you can see my ER status now. I'm TN, and my tumor was scored 2,3, and 3, for a final grade of 3. So almost as aggressive as they come. I'm very lucky it was caught as early as I did, and pray that it didn't have a chance to do too much damage while in its youth.
Jennifer, thanks for letting me know that your MO and surgeon both recommended a double mastectomy. That's good to know as we're pretty close in age and DX. I haven't even met with my surgeon yet and my MO hasn't brought up the surgery discussion yet. But given that I'm TN, too, with a family history (though no known genetic predisposition), and 51, that certainly may be the best option for me. Of course, I'm still on the fence re reconstruction or no reconstruction. Reconstruction, frankly, sounds like a major PITA. I mean, expander plates under my skin? Yikes! Maybe I should just get a dart board and decide already!
On a personal note, long before I was diagnosed, I'd planned a couples trip to Aruba for April 21-28, 2018. Even after my DX, I was thinking I could still swing it. But the closer I'm getting, the more I'm realizing that it just isn't in the cards for me. No matter what surgery I opt for, it'll happen in mid-March, and that is just not enough recovery time. After talking to my cousin (the other couple), I finally threw in the towel and contacted the owner of the place we rented (and pre-paid). I'm happy to report that she is going to try and get us new dates in the fall. If I can get American Air to waive the change fees, that would be ideal*, but even if they don't, I'll only be out $400 in change fees. By the fall, I hope I'll be fully recovered and more able to really enjoy myself. Having at least a few inches of hair will help!
*I had to cancel our California trip because I was diagnosed 2 weeks prior, and to my surprise, Delta refunded my entire non-refundable fare. So it's possible.
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MamaFelice I read your post. Lots to think about. I have no desire to reconstruct but would like to be even. I am DD on my healthy side and I quite like my little pouch on the right. With the right bra it would look like I was small breasted.
Anyone else on here do Doxetaxel. Holy moly. I’m not sick. But wow am I tired!! My lips are numb, fingertips sore and I feel like the lining of the inside of my mouth is going to peel off. Gratefully only two more of those!!
Also. For those a little further ahead. Does one go on tamoxifen before or after Rads? I would like before. I want all the protection I can get.
For the record, a birthday with breast cancer is hard.
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Hi, everyone, from snowy NYC! We're in the middle of a big storm and just called Sloan Kettering to make sure I am on for chemo tomorrow. I was worried for some reason the city's "official snow emergency" would shut down the breast center - I'm already a week behind on chemo and didn't want to postpone another dose. Luckily, they are fully up and running today so tomorrow should be no problem. (not sure when our city became such scaredy-cats when it comes to snow. didn't used to be this way!)
It's such a hard decision to make, how much of our breasts to give up to this disease. When I was first diagnosed my gut reaction was to have a BMX without reconstruction. My surgeon said she'd be willing to do a BMX for me if it would give me peace of mind but that there was no medical reason for it. My oncologist encouraged me to think hard about about a BMX since it would not help my chances of avoiding cancer in the future. After breast conserving treatment any new breast cancer wouldn't be a recurrence but a new primary cancer, with no more risk than the general population. What I had to worry about with TNBC was metastasis in another area of my body - not recurrence in the breast. So, after living with my diagnosis over these past 4 months and doing a lot of reading I came to the hard realization that I very much want to keep my breasts and nipples if I can. I feel less general anxiety about my situation now that I've decided to request a lumpectomy on what's left of my TNBC tumor, even with the radiation and twice-yearly imaging that goes with it. I'll also be taking Xeloda for 6 months after radiation as well (and hopefully get into a TNBC trail for new targeted treatment.)
I hope that all of you that are still waiting for surgery make final decisions that bring true you peace of mind. It's a really hard decision to make and each situation is unique. It sucks that we are all in the position where we have to make these choices, but it just goes to prove we're strong women and can be proud of our bodies no matter what after treatment!
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Agatha - it is a hard decision, but I get wanting to keep your breasts. When I was first diagnosed a few people said to me “I’d cut them off!” Well, that is easier said than done! It just didn’t feel like that choice made sense for me and my doctors agreed. It is great that you had the time to really think it through and make the right decision for the one who matters - you
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Joyseeker, I am so sorry you are having a lousy time with Taxotere. I wish I could help on that but I only had some permanent hair loss from it. Sleep when your body tells you too. It is so important to get that rest.
About tamoxifen, I took it during rads. Started it about two weeks after final Adriamycin and taxotere. Unfortunately, rads will make you tired too. I think it was just having to go daily that made me tired.
Keep on top of your mouth too. Salt water and a tiny bit of baking soda did the trick for me.
Yup, Birthday during treatment is hard...lucky me...did it freaking twice. Next year, better Birthday 😘
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