Chemo starting November 2018
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Hi Ladies!
I feel as if y'all are already friends - although you are just "meeting" me. I have been lurking on the boards for a while now and just finally got the gumption to create an account for myself. I started adjuvant TCHP Nov. 1 and go in for round 3 of 6 tomorrow. I am a Stage 3A, grade 3 with node involvement .... HER2+ PR- and as my MO says "a little bit" ER+ (20%) gal. SE's so far have been fatigue, nausea, bloody nose, tiny blister like sores on my hands and now my feet along with a teenage super acne breakout all over, a small rash after round 2 and dry mouth.
I am 47 - at least for a few more weeks. I hope to be on an up day for my birthday. When I reached my forties I stopped wanting to celebrate my birthday cause I didn't like the idea of getting older. Now, I want to celebrate a million more! I have 7 children. Six that still live at home. My youngest turned ten in the middle of our "it's cancer but we don't know more than that" cloud. It was so hard to smile and host a party with her friends while I felt the carpet had been ripped out from under me. My fourth grandchild was born just before Thanksgiving and I finally got to hold her yesterday!
I have a few survivor friends who have been helping me along this rocky path. Two of them are 2.5 years out, another is 7 and the other is at 20+ years. I hope to follow in their footsteps. Every time I think I am prepared and doing okay, my mind gets in the way and the games start all over again. I am most tired of that! I feel like a hamster on a wheel and try as I might, I can't get off! I still feel like me only ... not. I know you all understand that.
Thanks for being here (where none of us wanted to be) and thanks for letting me vent.
F
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Welcome Frmthahart...First of all, I have to say that I love your name! Wow, you are 47 with 4 grandchildren...you really are blessed! Good luck tomorrow! We have a good group of people on this board-a club that we never wanted to be part of. I only had one treatment (next is dec 26), but everyday seems to bring something new, and everyone's story is so different! After I was first diagnosed, I just wanted to wake up from this bad dream, but now I realize this is my life. But we need to try to stay strong, and whenever you need some extra support, come to this board, we are here for each other!!!
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Welcome frmthahart! I'm sorry that you're a part of us, but we're glad to have the good company!
I had to look up neoadjuvent. I went right into A/C Chemo 4x 2 weeks apart. I've had 2. I'll have Taxol for 4x and also 2 weeks apart. I am 20% Est positive, but negative in the other 2. Stage IIb Grade 3, in the node. I hope when I get a biopsy Wed, we find the source of this cancer. It's only been determined in the node, a 4.5 cm place. There were 2 places that lit up from the MRI. Next is surgery, not sure what kind, then radiation (how long and often???) and then 5 years of hormone therapy for my 20% positive. So, no, I don't think I had neoadjuvent treatment.I ordered a bunch of head coverings, scarves, etc online today. I can't wait for them to come. Yes, I gave a website of a wig place, received my wig, but it just isn't me. I think I'll rely on the head coverings. Tomorrow, I think I'll wear a hat to work. My head has a few sores on it; I don't know why.
Love you guys!! Drink, drink, drink, exercise, exercise, stay positive, and wrap yourselves around those who keep you positive.
Here's yesterday's picture of my head. LOL...I probably should've put on some lipstick. I look exactly like my 3 years younger brother! Ha ha!! It's a big difference from my profile pic, isn't it??
I changed my name from duncmelsmom (I have 2 kids, Duncan and Melanie) to emilyisme....I wanted to make it easier for you guys....
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Welcome, Frmthahart! We're glad you've found our community, and hope you find this place to be a source of support. And congrats on the new grandbaby, what a wonderful way gift! Best of luck with the rest of your treatment!
The Mods
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Neoadjuvent in reference to BC typically means treatment before surgery. It could be chemo, radiation tx or hormone therapy. The goal with the neoadjuvent therapy is to reduce the size or number of tumors for a more favorable less invasive surgical intervention.
One of my sisters compared a pic of me in the wig that my mom had gotten from a church friend of hers that had had lung cancer several years ago and donated it to me (whew, run on!) to... drumroll please - a game show host. Or suggested that I did a Photoshop of my husband's hair on my head. She may get a lump of coal in her stocking this year. It wasn't exactly a flattering picture for sure, but the wig had just come out of the box after being in storage for years. It wasn't fluffed, combed or even centered. Sheesh. She had said earlier about shaving her head in 'solidarity' whatever that means, but now, I'm feeling just in this moment petty enough to have her do it. Lol.
It's up on a wig stand in the living room right now, my husband mentioned that every time he catches it out of the corner of his eye, he thinks it's a beehive. Putting that plastic wig stand together was dangerous - I almost poked my eye!
I wore it for about 2 hrs on Sunday when my mom first brought it over. Then it got a little itchy, it left some red marks on my scalp that eventually went away. I'm not sure I'd it was pressure marks from the elastic or a rxn to the underpinning of the hair piece. I'll post 2 pics later this week, the original 'game show host', then one when I get it properly fluffed a bit more.
How are our purple and other fun colored wig ladies doing???? Love all the pics! MB1
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Thanks all for your support. The zofran gives me a migraine. I have one other set of pills for nausea and xanax and I dont feel any different. Im still vomiting daily and I hate it. Its hard to go out with my little one because I dont know when Im going to hurl. Hairs falling out now, nails are darkening. Cant quite keep food down. The 1st infusion I was nauseous in the beginning then after a few days I was ok. This 2nd one is a doozie. It hasnt stopped. Just counting down the days. I dont want anymore AC "red devil". Two more to go. You gals look great with your confident shaved heads and wigs by the way.
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Welcome Frmthahart - we will be having our TCHP on the same day, round #3. Mine is neoadjuvant (before surgery). I tried looking for my lumps and don't feel one of them for sure. Tomorrow, doctor will examine me and I'm curious what he will say. As we approach #4, he will order an ultrasound and we will make a decision on surgery. Frmthahart - congrats on the new grandbaby! I am 55 and our children are grown, you have your work cut out for you going through this with children in your house, hugs to you.
HopeBry - there are 2 other ladies where I work that have breast cancer and one had that "red devil" chemo. What a name! You hang in there, my co-worker is off work getting her reconstructive surgery and then she will be through this program. You got this.
Maddie - I have a purple wig. I have only wore my ACS wig once to work. I feel kind of funny wearing it, so I just wear my hats. I have one hat that looks like a baker's hat and my husband will look at me when I put it on, but he tells me, you wear what you want to wear, and that is a rule we should live by. Beehive!! That's funny! Our husbands try to make us laugh.
Emily - you look most awesome dearie! This spring, we shall all have our hair back and we will look back at this time. We are all going to be stronger then and I think we will enjoy life twice as much.
Good luck to everyone this week. Eat what you can when you can and I hope you have some Christmas cookies. I was able to make some over the weekend. I can feel "almost normal" that week before going back for TCHP - then your appetite just goes out the window. Keep drinking! Love and hugs. Lisa
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I haven't been on much so wanted to give an update. I just had my 3rd dose dense A/C today. My tumor started at 3.2cm, after the 1st infusion it shrunk to 2.something cm (can't remember exactly), and after 2nd infusion it shrunk to barely 1cm if that. He said it was barely measurable!!
So far it's been pretty easy for me. I have the steroid zoomies (that's what I call the day after infusion:) Then I feel funky for a few days. Then I start feeling better and better each day after. My Oncologist went over the "funky" feeling with me and asked me if I was taking my nausea meds. I told him no because I haven't felt nauseous. He said the "funky" "off" feeling that I have for those few days is probably nausea even though I don't feel nauseous like I'm going to throw up. He also asked me if I was taking my Nexium for acid reflux. Same answer....I take it when I feel like I need it. He said the same thing about the acid reflux...it could me contributing to to the "off" feeling since heartburn is a common problem with this chemo regimen. Will try taking my meds even if I don't feel nauseous or heart burn and see if those funky days are better. I can be a stubborn dumba$$ sometimes
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Recovery from cycle 3 has definitely been the hardest so far. I generally feel ok-ish but I'm way more tired this go round and the flu like, worn down feeling still hasn't gone away. To add insult to injury I have some sort of dental thing going on. I woke up this morning with the gum area above one of my teeth super swollen and its swollen all the way up into my cheek. I can't imagine what I did to cause that. I just had my dental x-rays done last month and things looked pretty good. Chemo has a way of finding all your little weaknesses and turning them into giant Achilles heels. I guess I call the dentist? Or the oncologist? What a nightmare.
I have a ton of baking to do this week. I'm already excited for our Christmas dinner (which we'll actually have on Christmas eve) and I have grand plans to do a ton of advance prep this weekend so that Monday I can just stick everything in the oven and relax. I still have some Christmas shopping to do and lots of gift wrapping to keep me busy all weekend.
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Hazelnut I’m on TCHP but I also was hit hard by cycle 3 , still feeling bad and it’s almost 2 weeks, nauseous, no appetite and now I have acne. Looking so forward to Christmas with the kids and my first grandchild’s first Christmas. Just need to get out of this chemo funk
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Susan, nice to hear from you, and glad to know things are going well for you! Glad it is shrinking! They say to "stay ahead" of side effects by taking the medication - hoping this will help you some.
Hazel - Sorry to hear about the problems you are having. I just had cycle #3 today, but you go more often than me, I think (I go every 3 weeks). I know L-Glutamide helps with mouth stuff, I buy the herbal pills at Walmart, just a thought. I had that filmy mouth junk with treatment #1 and started this and no more of that. I did a ton of baking Sunday, and wore myself out. Do not do too much, okay? Not worth it.
New from ny - hope you can get to feeling better soon. I lose my appetite too and it seems like it goes on right up until 3 or 4 days before treatment, and it comes back. Hugs to you. Doctor examined me today and could not feel either lump. Sending me for ultrasound December 27th. Not sure where we go after that, I know I have to finish all 6 treatments, and I might have surgery. I asked him if I would be taking Herceptin for a year, and his answer was yes, and he might also add Perjeta, we would have to see where I end up after ultrasound. My nurse told me Herceptin and Perjeta would be a piece of cake compared to TCHP, and doctor did tell me my hair would grow back and I wouldn't lose it with just those 2 drugs because they are auto immune antibodies. Hugs to everyone. I am so lucky to have a good nurse. We talked about paying it forward today, and things she has been through in her life. We should all pay it forward once we get this job done. Be strong! Lisa
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hazelnut. Talk to your oncologist about your mouth. I finished my third round last week and just started having mouth sores. I’m now using the ‘magic mouthwash ‘ and it’s helping. I have a slight fever and she’s now putting me on an antibiotic and an antiviral med. but more than anything I’m just worn out. However when I can get my head up I’m actually feeling good about just one more round. I just wish I had some hunger for .... anything. Oh when I can I’m going to eat my way across town. Didn’t realize just how much food isn’t in tv ads. Thank you ladies for you’re posts. So helpful
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I am soooo disappointed. I heard wonderful reviews of the American Cancer Society's "Look good Feel better" program. The meeting near my home in December was right after my chemo treatment and I couldn't go. I have been checking their website for the January listings and nothing has been posted. So earlier this week I sent them an email asking when the January classes will be posted. I woman wrote back, a friendly but disappointing reply!!! She said,
"Thank you for your email, which comes during a very busy time of transition for the Look Good Feel Better (LGFB) program. One of our program collaborators is leaving the program at
the end of 2018, and we are busy restructuring and rolling out an updated program platform for 2019. What this entails is basically on-boarding hospital workshop locations one at a time, and unfortunately, there
are no group LGFB workshops being offered until around March of 2019. I am truly sorry for this inconvenience."She also said that in the meantime we can register for a online virtual LGFB workshop. I'm sure this workshop is wonderful...but its not the same. Sorry...I don't mean to complain..but I was disappointed!!
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Hi everyone! Just wanted to check in and give an update. My second infusion was Tuesday. We did remove the IV Emend, and the oral Zofran. No migraine this time! A bit of heartburn/indigestion when I got up today, but not bad. I'm a bit tired, but nothing unbearable. Am having some blurry vision. Also, not sleeping well at all. Annoyingly not well. I fall asleep fine, but wake up around 1:30 and am up until about 5:00. It's beyond annoying! I'm taking magnesium, melatonin, and valerian root each night. Also use Ambien and Lunesta, but they don't always work. I've got Restoril and Ativan, but I'm afraid to take them since they are benzos and addictive.
My expanders are driving me nuts. I can't wait until chemo is done and I can exchange these expanders. Should be last week in February. Can't wait!
I'm up 10 lbs since my mastectomy. Was not worried about how I was eating (and not exercising) since I expected to lose weight on chemo, but I'm doing fine so now want to focus on getting back to my starting weight. The steroids make me hungry, though!
Hope all of you are doing well!
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Thanks for the warm welcome!!
I wrote a post yesterday and when I submitted it, it disappeared... internet issue on my end
I am so tired today that I am sure I will forget the wittiest and most important things I had to share 
Round 3 hasn't been too bad at this point. Although my WBC is really low, so I have been cautioned to be even more careful and warned about even more fatigue. My OnPro fell off before we even arrived home on infusion day. So, yesterday I had to go back down to my MO's office to get a shot instead - I gave them back the OnPro so they could send it back to get refunded the $9k that they were charged for it.
Flower216 - Thanks! I have been Frmthahart since my AOL days. I love being a "Nana"! It is wonderful to love all over them and then send them home!
Emilyisme - I love your smile!
MissouriCatLady - I have been thinking of you these last few days and hope that round #3 is going well for you!
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Susan05 - Wish I had your not so problems instead. I hate the vomiting.
MissouriCatlady- thanks for the motivating words. I am trying my best to hang in there.
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I posted this on one of the other threads. I was wondering if any of you ladies felt similar.
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Its weird, I have had waves of "feeling like a cancer patient". First was when the first biopsy results came in - it was a panic, worst case scenario in my head (I'm not going to spell that one out). The second after the 4rth biopsy results came in (panic at the disco time). The third actually when I met the medical oncologist and the fertility specialist in May this year. I didn't really have that "feeling like a cancer patient" after my 2 surgeries or during any of the scanning procedures (there were MANY). The fourth was getting the port and going to the chemo education class. And now without hair - I feel like a cancer patient.
The mind is a wonderful and horrible thing. I keep telling myself it's temporary. I'll come out on the otherside of this.
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This last dose of A/C has been horrid. Maybe I'm overly emotional with the crazy up and down with this. They didn't cut my dexamethasone via IV like was supposed to happen and I swear I felt drunky and crazy drugged. Fell asleep several times in the chair, my mom drove home, fell asleep several times in the car on the 20 min car ride home. Got home and the dog shredded and ate part of a MICROBEAD pillow. It was all over the downstairs. Took about 2.5 hrs to clean up and then I crashed and crashed hard. Mom slipped out while I was sleeping. The dog puked and had diahhrrea this crazy white snow-like stuff. Puked 8x, diahhrrea 2x. Took her to the vet this afternoon, she is going to be fine. Chicken and rice small freq meals and monitor. So far so good, no more puking since this morning. Looks like it's all going to pass thru. Our sink also started a fountain like leak underneath, hubs and I sorta got into it with each other. Sink is fixed we made up yesterday but it was not pretty. Overly emotional thank you chemo pause, drugged up zombie thank you steroids, problems sleeping last night thank you pup and steroids, Christmas blues, etc etc etc.
We will all come out on the otherside. I have some faith on that. I just wanted some reassurance from you wonderful ladies that in this - I am not alone. And you ladies bring it and I am grateful. MB1
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Maddie, I'm so sorry to hear this, and am sorry you're going through this. Wow...I've seen some pretty bad off patients getting Chemo, moaning, sleeping off and on, and I wonder if it's their last treatment of A/C. I keep hearing that it's cumulative, and that the SE will be worse on it. I think you just confirmed that.
I go for #3 on Wednesday. I feel good, but I'm in slow motion. Every trip up or down the steps exhausts me. I am proud to say I got all of my wrapping finished just now. I'm usually doing it Christmas Eve. I'm so glad not to have that hanging over my head.
Lots of love to you guys! Hang in there! I just read a friend's blog from 2012 with TNBC. She did it and so will we!! Drink drink drink that water!
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I definitely feel a little better today, Emilyisme. My neck and shoulders seem to have the majority of the pain right now. No longer feel drugged or drunk (yay...). Proper application of a head and neck heating pad and a hot shower is just the ticket. The pup is doing better too. Still pooping snow, but at least its only coming out one way now. (Bright side right?)
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Glad your dog is okay, the things they get into!! Sorry you had to fix your sink too, things don't stop for us, do they? Our heater went out last weekend and I was thankful the man could come on a Saturday.
Yes, I am a cancer patient. I have trouble with that word - survivor. When are you a survivor? After it has come back a 2nd or 3rd time? I can't credit myself with surviving anything. My nurse told me after treatment #3, it isn't so bad, because you are used to everything. Everyone is different though. I've been very tired and am thankful to have an extra 2 days off for Christmas. I hope you all are surrounded by loved ones and friends that make you feel loved and taken care of. My husband calls the cats all kinds of names (kidding, I hope), as he cleans my litter boxes out for me every day.
My nurse is an awesome woman and I am grateful to have crossed her path really. We had a long talk last week about paying it forward, and how things have not always gone the way she would have chosen in her life. Someone helped her, so she tries to help others now. I hope one day I can be like her.
I have a nasty rash because probably I am fat, it is under my fat roll and yeasty. Had to call the doctor on call this weekend to get a prescription and some powder. I am somewhat thankful I'm fat when I don't want to eat anything. Hope you all are able to enjoy the Christmas goodies and leave some cookies out for Santa.
Remember that movie, with the theme song, Always Look on the Bright Side of Life? Just have to play that in my head from time to time. Merry Christmas and think spring, and drink lots of water! Love and hugs, Lisa
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I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. My children, who are in the throes of that self absorbed teen phase, have been uncharacteristically attentive with me lately and they spent more time with me than with their video games. My middle son wrote me a letter as my Christmas gift that was so sweet it made me cry.
My body was in full on rebellion the last week or so. If it's attached to a mucous membrane it has gone haywire. My gums are covered in little abscesses, my eyes won't stop watering and the skin around them is chapped and raw. Same for my nose. Despite being on daily stool softeners and fiber supplements I became spectacularly constipated and now we enter into the realm of TMI when I say I developed an anal fissure and ladies, it is the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my life. More painful than childbirth. My doctor says it's just one more thing that's related to the irritation to the mucous membranes from the chemo. I'm trying not to have too much of a pity party for myself, in truth I spend a lot of time joking about it because it's still just so absurd to me that I'm going through all of this. My husband and I have had many, many laughs over the sad sorry state of me in the last few days.
I've found a new lump in my unaffected breast. I'm sure it's nothing. I'm so numb by this whole process I can't even dredge up a little worry that it might be something. I'll show it to the doctor next week and I'm sure she'll want to do the full work up circuit so what's the point in worrying? I worried myself half crazy before my first u/s, mammo and biopsy and ended up with cancer anyway.
I started watching The Ranch on Netflix last weekend and I don't know what took me so long. That show is hilarious.
Maddie- I'm glad your dog is ok. I can only imagine the mess! I only just started feeling like a cancer patient the last couple weeks. Before that I didn't really feel all that different to how I did pre-cancer. Now I've lost a lot of energy and stamina and look like hell. My last infusion I went into my infusion room, curled up in the chair and slept through 90% of it. That's so unlike me, once upon a time the idea of letting strangers see me that vulnerable or weak would have horrified me.
MoCat - I don't know when I'll feel comfortable calling myself a survivor. Not now, when I feel as though a stiff wind could knock me over. In my head I keep thinking that through some divine intervention I will be graced with some sort of inner grit or strength or determination to fly forward in the face of all of this and be a sort of cancer superwoman.
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It is nice to hear from you, Hazel-Nut, hope you had a happy Christmas. Those letters sure can melt your heart. I will try watching The Ranch. I'm sorry to hear about your new lump. I thought my rash was from hell, but I don't feel so bad hearing about your anal fissure. Who would have thought we could have this conversation a year ago? Hugs to you, friend.
I was reading this article https://www.rollingstone.com/culture/culture-news/... since they keep advertising Gilda Radner on CNN on New Year's Day. Just wanted to share, in case anyone is interested, it talks about being a "cancer patient", as we all are now.
In looking at Facebook yesterday, I saw an old friend's post, who was having her chemo on Christmas. She said, "I'm getting my gift at the hospital!!! Another day at life!! If this lady only knew the amount of inspiration she gives off. You mention cancer superwoman - I wish we could all aspire to become that, and thank you to those of you that inspire me to keep trying.
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I think "endurer" rather than 'survivor' is much more appropriate in all our cases.
Rashes - ouch, I had one on the inside of the leg where your panty elastic would go after my mastectomy. Took close to 3 weeks to heal. Those dang crevices just love to get ooggie. Anal fissures - man oh man. I had a "small one". Almost worse than kidney stone pain. I feel both your pains. I've been having a weird mouth/tongue thingy lately, but have just been gargling so far. My 'new' lump is apparently an abcess in my right freaking arm pit. Warm compresses, no shaving (ha! Haven't needed to do that since 2nd week in Nov), and make appt w primary care after my neutrophils bounce back. They don't want a secondary infection (mmm, all I want for Christmas is a secondary infection please!).
Pup is totally back to normal. Spent Christmas Eve w my Jewish cousins and family/friends, one of which has her bday on Christmas Eve. Saw more people that night (@30) than I have in one place since the beginning of November. I peopled myself out. Had tacos for Christmas day dinner, just me and hubs. Went into a taco coma and didn't emerge for about 5 ish hours. Tacos again tonight (no coma this time).
Starting to get a little anxious about starting Taxol (paclitaxel) on Friday - mainly the neuropathy side effects......
Love and holiday hugs to all. Everyone dealing w SEs, may they be minimal going forward. Safe travels to those on the road. MB1
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Hello Ladies!
I should be sleeping but I just found this group and have really enjoyed reading what little I’ve been able to so far. I started THCP (and neulasta 😩) in November and go for round three on Jan 2nd. I’m now sporting the Velcro style hair, random acne, and stubborn chin hair look. Never felt more lovely. My 5 year old says I look like a ninja turtle. I’m not sure if it’s a compliment but I thank him just the same. He did suggest that I find LEGO hair for real people. He may be on to something.
Hazel, I just found a lump in my other breast today. I’ve had PET scan in the past month. Seems unlikely it’s anything serious but at this point, who knows. Even though both boobs are getting evicted, I still worry it’s a different type of cancer and my chemo now isn’t working on the newly found mass. But you’re right, worrying does nothing productive in the end.
I really just wanted to say hello to you all and wish you a happy new year! I plan on reading more of this thread To catch up
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I hope everyone had a great Christmas! I really enjoyed my time with my family. When it was all said and done though, I was completely worn out.
Round 3 has brought more nausea. I don't do nausea well. I was sick for 9 months with each of my pregnancies and was taking zofran to survive then. So, I just don't do nausea now. PERIOD. The last few days have been rough! I am hoping that my days will be on the upswing now - especially since most of the family has headed out of state to visit extended family. I have my two oldest kids with me to help out. The house is so quiet! I feel alone. It doesn't help that I have been stuck in a "what if" loop. I have been reading too many things on the boards that have me fearing that I am not going to get on the other side of this thing. I keep trying to lift my head out of the funk. No luck so far ....I think I need an intervention.
You are all in my thoughts and prayers. I hope your making it through the SE's well!
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Welcome Suzy. A ninja turtle? They say the darndest things don't they. The velcro hair - I was telling my mom yesterday that it felt like Velcro! The other months boards (chemo starting Aug 2018... Chemo starting Sept 2018 etc) also have some valuable info.... Catching up is hard to do... (Sing song, sorry).
I feel a little daffy this morning singing in the shower, I'm sure the neighbors loved it.... (Maybe not). At least I amuse myself and my hubs..... Gotta laugh at some if this craziness.... Getting wrapped up in the what if cycle is mindwracking. There is a little thread called something like "will it kill me?", tongue in cheek - one of the ladies posted a food choice dilemma and it sort of took off from there (spoiler alert - she did eat the mousse).... Another one "thin slices of joy"... Whenever I start getting into one of those what if cycles, I take a break and take a look at the thin slices or the dogs dogs dogs or cats cats cats or the what's for dinner threads. It can't be cancer all the time - we have lives outside of our diagnosis....
Worked about 7.5 hrs yesterday, trying for the same today. Fatigue has still been my biggest challenge...... MB1
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I wish I could respond to each of you ladies but my iPad is slow and awkward and I have no short term memory to hold all of it in my head. But the brunt of it is -to each of you YES!!! Round three landed me with mouth and esophaguses sores that made eating and even talking a struggle. I did all the washes and treatments and it really took till my numbers improved for things to get better. Constipation! I have severe ulcerative colitis (which has been well controlled thankfully) which is a colon thing with unbelievable diarrhea. Not only has this treatment NOT caused a flare (grateful grateful grateful) but’s it has tempered my view of the constipation. So there is that. Looking for those silver linings. But here’s the strangest thing. Yesterday I went into round four almost gleeful. This may be bad - but’s its the last of this bad. And I know i can do it. The neulasta kicks my butt. But I’m grateful for it because I it increases my chances for what comes next in my life. I have no energy, I’m sluffleing around like a little black cloud. I look like I’ve aged a good twenty years BUT I’m more hopeful than I’ve been then this started. Good luck to you all. My heart is with you
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The stomach flu is making the rounds at work and I'm feeling straight up panic at the thought of catching it. People keep walking in my office and starting conversations by saying "Ugh, I don't feel good" and I'm like... get the h*ll away from me!!! I haven't touched anything with my bare hands today and I'm spraying lysol everywhere.
Last summer we went on a little romantic weekend getaway to this amazing little inn in the Shenandoah's and last night just booked another weekend getaway for next month. I'm so excited to have a mini vacation in the middle of all of this. I'm not sure how much romance there will be but I am beyond thrilled to just spend a weekend sitting in front of a fireplace with a book and a mug of coffee and a view of the mountains outside the window.
Lizzie - I'm almost looking forward to round 4 because I know it's the last time I'll feel the way I've been feeling the last 3 rounds. Everyone at the hospital keeps swearing to me that Taxol will be easy breezy so here's to hoping.
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Hi everyone!
I really enjoyed the Gilda Radner article. I hope I spelled her name right. I don't know about y'all, and I respect the heck out of people who choose to do otherwise, but I'm not going against my doctor about anything. I'm surprised how much she did.
A/C #3 was yesterday. I had the Chemo brain for #1 and #3. I don't remember it for #2. I'm sleepy today, but no more Chemo Brain as I had last night. My right foot was killing me over the weekend. It's still red and somewhat swollen. My doctor said to keep lubing it up with lotion so I don't get "hand and foot". I'm doing it. I had a couple of mouth sores, but think that I'm going to start gargling so they don't increase. Thanks for the forewarning.
I know I always say this but I'm a teacher and it was just said that 5% of our state's population has flu like symptoms. It is scaring me about working in a school with so many germs. I have a teacher work day on Jan 2, but might stay out after that. Dr. said he doesn't want me to stay home; more people choose to work just to keep their minds off of the cancer. That makes lots of sense. I just find myself completely exhausted after a day of work, and I don't know how healthy that is.
It was a wonderful Christmas with so many family members donning pink in my honor. I am truly blessed with a huge support group behind me. I don't know if I've said, but I have over 300 people on my "I'm Calling BS to BC" page. If you would like to be a member, I'll be glad to add you. Just let me know. I'm Emily McGrady and you can ask to be my friend, then I'll add you in the secret group.
I'm so ready like you guys have mentioned to have the 4th (and last) A/C completed! My port has had complications. They can't get a blood return. After making me sit in multiple positions with arm up, arm down, face to the right, face left, face up, standing, lying on my side, etc etc, they have to give a medicine and let it sit for 30 minutes. Apparently, there is a skin flap that is preventing the blood return and the medicine dissolves it. It's not fool proof, I still have to turn my head multiple ways before they find the one way that works for the treatment session. My fear is that it will quit working during a treatment and the "red devil" will be a disastrous mess. Warning: do NOT google red devil images. There are some terrible blistered disasters out there.
Love you guys! Drink that water!!
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Su-Z-Q - sorry to hear about your new found lump. Thats nerve racking. Glad we have our hilarious children to keep up smiling with unexpected comments.
HazelNut - sorry to hear on your new findings as well. Its so scary and I cant imagine having to go through chemo a second or 3rd time. Id lose my mind. I prefer to get back to normalcy and my golas in life. I dont want anymore pauses.
Just got my 3rd AC infusion terrible experience. My other nurse usually gives the Cytoxin forst then the A red devil. This other nurse did the reverse and I could smell everything through my nose. I was nauseous same evening into next day. When I tried to sleep I had menopausal hot flashes at age 41. Maybe its because Im on my period but never had that happen. The nausea meds that were working prior to this 3rd infusion, dont work at all right now. Just unbearable. I pray I feel a little better by Jan. Have some job interviews and hopefully it will be less of a hassle with weekly Taxol than the AC infusions twice on 2weeks. Ive lost work opportunities once I was transparent about my bi weekly chemo.
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