Deciding to Go Flat . . . Maybe. Please advise.
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I’m on vacation, promise to read all posts & reply back when I have a keyboard! Thanks all. (- -) ❣️
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Beesy
Thanks again for your PM... talking and seeing is bringing a light to what is about to happen to me...Something none of us should go through....
With all your knowledge and info, being prepared and all, some times it's out of the Doctors hands - they have your best interest at heart, and try to do they best they can to help....
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Christene502 I think you might have misunderstood me. It's not that the surgeon cannot remove the dog ear..I just don't think they realize it is going to be that when they do the surgery. At least not in my case...bc mine is not a dog ear that flops over its more like a little bulge of fat....and actually the longer I am healing the smaller it is actually getting. My surgeon did not mention a nip / tuck until my first recheck which was only a 10 days post op still pretty swollen and when she said it she said "you MAY eventually want a little nip /tuck there if it bothers you" but again..mine does not flap over. I sent Bessy pictures of me and the ones I sent I look actually different even now 5 days after than that part looked in them. I will PROBABLY eventually get that area smoother only because it will be covered by insurance.
The one thing I will say...is I do not EVER EVER EVER regret not re-constructing. I am SOOOOO happy I decided against implants. Best. Decision. I. Ever. Made.
PS: At my appointment today to get some fluid drained my surgeon actually was telling me how she cannot believe how many women are now opting NOT to get implants.
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NicoleRod
I have a slightly bulging flab under the armpit already... not sure if it's due to being big breasted or on the heavy side.. When I speak to my breast surgeon I will show him and discuss what he will do during surgery, if he can and will make sure I have no or very little dog ears as possible...That's all I can do, right?.... I don't want a revision, ugh please no more surgeries,,, I have had more than my fair share...That's one reason my reconts.
Good luck with your appt today... hope all goes well....
FYI - my BS keeps pushing implants... says I'm young to go flat..
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Hi Chistene502,
Breast size and BMI play a role, I had 36DDD breasts and have a small dog ear on the SNB side. My BS spent extra time on the left side to give me a smooth edge and that incision goes around almost to my back.
She was candid about expectations, overall I’m really happy with the result. I LOVE going flat!
I hope your surgeon honors your wishes and does the flat closure rather than deciding for you that you might “change your mind” once you’re under anesthesia and leave extra skin, that has happened to women.
Best of luck
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Hi Darnit_DDD
Even though my BS would prefer me having implants - reconstruction, I have made it clear, that I do not want fake boobs... Back of my mind I wonder if they push this to get business to their fellow doctors. I dunno....
I personally think that large breasted women have more of an issue with 'dog ears', than those who have smaller breasts.
It's all how the surgeon handles it... All women should be knowledgeable of this 'dog ears' so surgeons pay more attention while under the knife. Deal with then than after...
Wishing you only the best. xo
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Darnit and Christene, I think Darnit (great name, by the way) gets right to the point. I told my PS that I understood that the incision line would need to be longer, even going over to the back, and I had PHOTOS of a bad dog ear and also after her revision surgery where the scar clearly goes over to the back. I told her I was fine with a longer scar. I thanked her for not trying to convince me to do reconstruction---even asked her if my breast surgeon had warned her that I was absolutely certain I would not change my mind. She just laughed and said no but I think she truly thought I would change my mind, and leaving that flesh and skin would help with reconstruction. I believe I did everything humanly possible to prevent mine (and while they're not bad, they're not how Darnit is describing hers, either). Christene, this all reminds me to PM you the photo of the revision surgery of the bad dog ear photo I originally sent to you so you can bring that to your surgeon as well.
I think I will look into revision surgery because it's not just cosmetic, my arm bumps into the L one especially. And as things would happen, my L bump is larger (cancer side) and now that it is radiated, it's very tender. I know that won't last forever, but I guess I don't want these forever, either. If anyone reading this at a future date wants me to PM them photos to help try to avoid this so they can talk to their breast surgeon or plastic surgeon, know that I'm happy to help someone avoid this any way I can.
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Beesy
If you are looking into revision would you use the PS you used in the first place? It seems no matter what you said and showed her to avoid 'Dog Ears', she wasn't truly listening or cared...Even though from the photo that you have shown me, she did an excellent job on the stitches...
Personally I prefer to have a longer scar than a chuck of flabby skin under my arm....
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Christene,
I've mulled that over quite a bit. I've thought about going to my breast surgeon, who by this time is like an old friend--he did my first breast surgery in 97. He chose the PS among all those on staff but I've thought about asking him, do you think there's someone else who would get me to where I want to be, for certain this time? Because you're right--she did not listen and I am not sure I want to go back to her for that reason. She did do a beautiful job on the incision. It looked great the day of surgery!
I wanted to avoid two surgeries but since I didn't, I want to be sure to get it right the second time. Here's hoping you're more successful than I!
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Hello Ladies! I'm sorry it's been such a long time for my explant update. I did have surgery to explant on 11/8/18. This was my personal decision after living with silicone Mentor Implants for a year & a half. I was having joint pain, atypical chest pain and overall never felt like they were ever part of my body. I asked for a capsulectomy and en bloc incase after such a short time one had grown. Everything went smoothly. I do not regret my decision at all, I am far more comfortable in my own skin. Do I like being flat & having huge scars--- hell no, but cancer took my real breasts and there is no going back, only forward. Do I like being flat compared to big, fake boobs that were making me sick, hell yes!
My only regret was not asking my PS to save the implants & capsules after surgery to show me. I did give him my Mentor card back. Lol. BTW, they were 350cc round high profile smooth silicone implants. My natural were @ 36C-D. I've attached a photo so you can see what flat looks like after 5 months of healing. As you can see the scars are much longer, and why one is angled down-- I do not know. It drives me crazy being non symmetrical. The added length came as an attempt to prevent the notorious "dog ears" my surgeon stitched from the outside to the center. As you can see on the right by my lat, there is a bit of tissue-- I also have a bit near my upper chest/armpit area when I bend over. Not sure if it's fluid, fat I need to tone up or what, but plan to ask my general surgeon when I see him for my check up. Once you go in for your post op check with you PS, you're then done as for as they're concerned. I felt a bit turned away, you know? No silicone, no longer a patient. Oh well.
What else am I forgetting to mention. Recovery was so much easier-- surgery was only 1-2 hours. Two drains after which were removed on day 3. Doing minimal yoga on day 4-- no arms or anything extreme. I'm really a believer in naturally trying to build up my own chest muscles to have an appearance of a chest/breast. We'll see how that goes. I also have pectus excavatum-- a concaving of the breast bone. It made everything more complicated but does give me a bit of cleavage naturally. We were just in Hawaii and I must say bathing suits were challenging-- but just take your time and find one that doesn't make it obvious. I brought all these prosthesis, pads and what not and ended up just wearing none of them. Same for clothes; did a bunch of research on flat chested clothing styles (Pinterest rocks!) and bought a bunch of printed tops, ruffled fronts, textured eye distracted blouses, scarves, etc. But, you know what-- I do not care anymore. I am flat and I hate trying to conceal it. Hate wearing tight padded sports bras or bras w/ pockets for expensive prosthesis. I refuse. Truthfully no one notices! No one. And if they do-- will they actually have the balls to ask you about it. No! Your friends know, love and support your flatness. Honestly, to me it's absolutely empowering. It is the badge of courage I bear and choose to wear proudly every day. I want to get one of those t-shirts that make it clear. FLAT A.F. #breastcancersucks
Random Side Note: Recently a good friend, who's been through our path for 5-7 years now, just found a lump in her armpit. Two MRI's later, her textured silicone implant is ruptured without cause. She's trying to get it removed now with a different PS here in Reno. We have no idea how long that toxic sludge has been leeching into her body. She wants to reimplant. It is so difficult for me not to overspeak or preach the FLAT PATH. I don't understand. Silicone is not meant to be inside our bodies.
Anywho . . . hope I covered everything. Please feel free to write, post or ask any questions you have. I'm happy to share any insight with anyone interested in going flat. All my love~ Geez (- - )
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Geez, thank you for sharing! You are an inspiration. If I can convince my surgeon I want a BMX on Tuesday, then I also have to convince her I’m going flat. I’m hormone neg, comedo high grade DCIS on the left, and “something new” the MRI picked up on the right. I’m braca neg though. I’ll find out more about that after a sonogram on Tuesday.
I know even with the high grade and being hormone neg, they'll consider my plan over treatment. But I have financial reasons as well. High deductible insurance, only getting paid this year for 3 weeks more off work, (I’ve taken a week already), and I’ll have to not only go w/o a paycheck, but pay for my health ins 100% once I’m done with my vacation time off. Only 3 sick days/yr. on top of that - our company puts FMLA time off beyond vacation & sick on some matrix so they can deduct some vacation from you next year. Something they do NOT DO to people who just miss a lot of work cause they feel like it. Unfair? Yeah I think so.
Anyway right now we can afford it. Hubby is taking his SSI and working full time. But what if it comes back in 3 years? Hubby will be retired at that point. It won’t bode well for us financially. Of course anything can happen, I know. But at least I’ll feel like I did all I could to prevent this monster from returning.
It’s hard to find anything much online about hormone neg, high grade DCIS. Mostly all about positive, low grade. Still it seems that they still feel like it’s “not really” cancer, and just recommend the same treatment plan.
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I have hormone neg (it's less than 10% ER+) and grade 3. Like you, I find myself confused by it being "just DCIS" but then again, high grade and not treated with adjuvant therapy. My oncologist said she sees a lot of grade 3 DCIS, so I guess it's not unusual.
You are right to think of your work situation, your financial situation, and the longer term.
Women get a lot of criticism in medical papers for just going mastectomy - and socially, for not opting for reconstruction - but it can be the cheapest option with the fastest recovery. If those things sound good, women shouldn't be made to feel it's unusual to make that choice. Gawd, I wish I'd done it from the beginning...
I was surprised to see that my lumpectomy, re-excision, and mastectomy all cost about the same amount. Had I been paying out of pocket, knowing what I know now, I would have been kicking myself that I didn't just go with a mastectomy, because I'd be paying 3 times as much to end up in the same place. Of course, no one knows their path in advance.
But I am not a woman who thinks "I must have my chest or I won't feel the same about myself." I had always found "the girls" kind of annoying, too heavy, etc. I just wanted to get back to living life, and not dealing with surgeries anymore. I did not find voices to support that until near the end of my surgery process, when I was doing intensive research on the flat path and reaching out to all the women I could find who'd been through this or known someone who had to hear about their paths. All this is to say, if you know what you want, and feel kinship with those on a certain path, I believe you can trust that to lead you to a good place.
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Thanks for sharing Alto! I am still considering everything, actually. I have a friend who in early 50's had the DIEP after choosing BMX due to her DX and strong family history. She is beyond thrilled even years later. My first reaction to going flat was NO FREAKING WAY!!! It can wind up looking really bad unless your surgeon is experienced. And many still leave you with dog ears etc "just in case". I like my hair shorter here lately after losing 20 lbs over the last year. I don't like the "looking like a little old pot belly man" idea either. I know I really wouldn't like it. I know I'd forever wear a tee shirt when having sex. My DH is supportive of whatever my decision is, but I know he too is concerned about finances. I would feel so guilty causing us more money in the long run.
My "girls" were always a source of great pride. Until menopause and now they are not firm, and pointing down. But, while my friend made it fine through an 8 hour surgery, I'm sort of scared of that. I quit smoking 6 years ago, but now I vape e-cigs. I may not be a candidate based on that. So for me if I chose reconstruction, it would have to be implants. The horror stories don't really bother me, because I know that you hear more about bad results than good online. It's more all the appointments and follow up surgeries involved. If I did it, it would need to be BMX, direct to implant. Still, a long surgery, though not quite as involved as DIEP. I HATE having to make these decisions.
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Please allow me to emphasize that I am not in any way putting down any woman deciding to go flat. It's just I'm not sure yet. I know I would look like a pot bellied old man if I did it. When I say no freaking way, the first photos I saw were really botched up surgeries. I have seen some fabulous outcomes, and some with tattoos that are beautiful! I so admire these very strong ladies who are not defined by breasts!! Please know that.
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Going Flat - May 6th is it, my day of surgery is all set.
Scheduled my medical clearance and hospital admission dates. Another appt with Dr nurses to go over paperwork.
Stomach is in a tizzy.
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No worries, Stitch. When I read about recon, it sounds like too much for me, so I guess we all have our different comfort zones. Flat looked different to me a first, but it feels more normal now, and was the option that felt most natural to me when it all came down to it.
I knew from my first surgeries that my surgeon showed great attention to detail and concern for the cosmetic result, and she said she could get the results I wanted. I was a thinner version of myself at that time because I was so freaked out, and that may have helped get a flat result.
Sending good vibes to Christene. Those presurgery days can be nerve wracking, but it will be ok. You are strong. You have your team, and they will take good care of you
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Thanks Alto
I can use all the good vibes I can get. ox
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GeezAlready_911, thanks for sharing. I went the full circle on reconstruction- plastice, DIEP, nothing....... I think I am glad that a surgeon felt I was not a good candidate for DIEP, otherwise I might have gone that route. Each day I am more comfortable with the decision to go flat. My scars are healed unequaly. The cancerous left healed nicely, even with the sentinal node removal (1-2). The right side still looks red after 2 years. Maybe I overworked the right side? I am very right handed, and I shoveled snow that winter when I probably should not have done that, too early. Still thinking about a tattoo, but a little chicken. Sounds like it will take longer than I thought, and might hurt more than I thought. It would be my first tattoo. One or two people advised that the artists do not want a person to be stoned/drunk/high etc or take anything that might make them bleed more. My choice to do a bi, even though the surgeon counseled that there was no medical reason to remove a healthy breast, but that many women were choosing to do that. I swim laps regulary now, but do change in a bathroom stall or private shower. I work out in gym regularly, and do not worry if the flatness shows. I think as more women choose to go flat, it will be less noticed. And only a really crass person or perhaps a child would say something.
2009 ER+ left breast. 52 yrs. Lumpectomy, Sentinel node removal, negative. – 1. Radiation 6 weeks, tamoxifen 5 years. Dense lumpy left breast, normal right. Acupuncture offered at facility as part of integrative medicine. It really helped with anxiety/stress during radiation treatment.
2016 ER+ left breast. Probably a new cancer, but unknown. 4 rounds TC Aug-Oct 2016, Bi-lateral (my choice) Nov 2016, no reconstruction. 2 sentinel nodes remove, negative. Cold Capping using Chemo Cold Caps (DIGNICAP not available). Anastrozole 1 mg starting May 2017. Joint issues noticed immediately. Stopped Anastrozole after 3-4 months due to joint stiffness in. After several months of no AIs, fingers were feeling better. Started tamoxifen March 2018
10/2018 noticed stiffness and some trigger finger again. Was eating meat a lot more (daily) than normal. Usually 1-2 /wk. Have cut way back on the meat, seems to help, but one finger still very prone to trigger finger. 2/2019, trigger finger and stiffness much better.
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Thank you for sharing! I had a double mastectomy 5 years ago and have had textured implants for 4.5 years. After the latest hearings at the FDA, I'm considering explant surgery. A five-year cancerversary gift to myself. I have never really liked the implants but I'm not sure how I will like myself without them, either. My PS is excellent and I feel comfortable with her and confident that she will give me the best result possible for my situation. I think going flat could be a relief - but I"m not sure how to process everything.
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I currently have gummy implants and have some questions. Although I love the look (after many fat revisions) and love the 3D tattoo ... Now with the news about implants causing cancer and even being stopped in some countries I feel I am back where I was years ago; having to make reconstruction/no reconstruction decisions.. I was told implants lasted forever. So that’s a load of crap I was fed by my PS! So I guess my choices are remove and replace with non textured. Or remove and do nothing. My implants are under the muscle and have definitely affected sports such as my ability to drive a golf ball a decent distance. I am torn on what to do and wonder if anyone is aware of a tattoo that would give the look of a 3D breast. I have searched and found tattoos with designs but it isn't what I'm looking for.
If I remove my implants; what happens to my stretched pec muscle?
Can someone point me in the direction of some photos of a mastectomy without reconstruction that will show me the best results I can ever expect to get if everything went perfectly
Stupid question. Can they remove the implants, make the skin smaller and fill it with fat. I don’t have a lot of fat but I’m sure I’d have enough for little bitty boobies!
Thanks for your help!
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Are you aware that the tattoo ink can be found in lymph nodes
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Hi there ...just joining this forum and found your journey.
How has everything gone so far?
Thank you
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double mastectomy May 6th
Breast surgeon just informed me that if I want to avoid any hard lumps - dog ears under my arm pit I will need a plastic surgeon.
I am guessing he has my best interest at heart... He wants the best appearance for me...
Now the problem is the PS my BS recommended does not accept my insurance....
Do I call my BS and ask for another PS... Or have the mastectomy then a year later have revision to correct the doge ears?
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Christene50, I would call and ask if he works with any other plastic surgeons who take your insurance. Your BS probably wasn't even thinking about insurance when he made the recommendation. Hope your surgery goes smoothly.
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JoniB When I asked if the PS accepted my ins, he first said I believe so, then asked his nurse and said not sure... You would think they would know this if it's his first choice of PS he works with.... Stupid me, when the nurse made the appt my mind wasn't thinking fast enough... I should have told the nurse to ask the PS about ins right then.. I didn't realize until I did a search on him on line...
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Christene,
Don't beat yourself up about trying to remember everything. I prepare a list of questions for my appointments and I end up not asking half of them. Try to work with your BS to see if you can get a plastic surgeon he works with or knows of his work. I can't speak directly to your situation but I would think you would want to try to get this done in one operation. If you have a nurse navigator( if at a treatment center) they might help or ask your MO if he can refer you to someone. Perhaps your GYN. If you can connect with other BC patients who liked their PS that may help.On positive note at least your BS made this recommendation for your best outcome. What if you asked you first PS office that doesn't take your insurance for a recommendation? Just trying to throw out some ideas. You have a lot to deal with and I hope this can be resolved. Wishing you the best of luck moving forward. Keep us posted
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Christine - it is a very confusing time with lots of information being thrown at you. Don't be hard on yourself for forgetting to ask something. You should be able to call the DR and talk to the DR or nurse. I found that taking a recorder was helpful because I do not always remember everything, or hear things correctly. I also wrote down all my questions, try to organize them etc. When I met with the surgeon for the first time, I asked a friend to come along. I gave her the list, and she checked off whether I asked the question or not. Towards the end of the visit, she brought up the questions on my list that I had not asked. Both the surgeon and oncologist were comfortable with my using a recorder, bringing a friend, and asking lots of questions. The surgeon even commented that she appreciated patients who advocated for themselves. Good luck to you.
2009 ER+ left breast. 52 yrs. Lumpectomy, Sentinel node removal, negative. – 1. Radiation 6 weeks, tamoxifen 5 years. Dense lumpy left breast, normal right. Acupuncture offered at facility as part of integrative medicine. It really helped with anxiety/stress during radiation treatment.
2016 ER+ left breast. Probably a new cancer, but unknown. 4 rounds TC Aug-Oct 2016, Bi-lateral (my choice) Nov 2016, no reconstruction. 2 sentinel nodes remove, negative. Cold Capping using Chemo Cold Caps (DIGNICAP not available). Anastrozole 1 mg starting May 2017. Joint issues noticed immediately. Stopped Anastrozole after 3-4 months due to joint stiffness in. After several months of no AIs, fingers were feeling better. Started tamoxifen March 2018
10/2018 noticed stiffness and some trigger finger again. Was eating meat a lot more (daily) than normal. Usually 1-2 /wk. Have cut way back on the meat, seems to help, but one finger still very prone to trigger finger. 2/2019, trigger finger and stiffness much better.
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Hi....This is my 3rd time I am facing bc...I have my biopsy scheduled for tomorrow Surgeon says it has all the markings for cancer and if it is it will be at least a Mx. If I do that, I might want to just go flat BUT I have questions. What about sex? And sexuality. I know that at age 69 I should not worry about that, but I feel 30 ! And my husband says it won't bother him but....It will bother me. I had 2 lumpectomies and radiation,,,I am lopsided already but at least I have 2 a little one and a big momba jomba one. I wear a fake on the small side to make clothes look normal.
Does a mx or bx affect the sex life? Or feeling attractive????
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Thank you for sharing. As I am facing a new breast cancer, I am ready to have my implants removed and it is comforting to hear of your quick recovery.
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No one wants to comment to my question about sexuality and mx or bx? Ok then,
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