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Deciding to Go Flat . . . Maybe. Please advise.

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Comments

  • lezza13
    lezza13 Member Posts: 579

    Romaska- I could not have said it any better myself. What a wonderful way to look at it! I like you, am happy with no boobs, no bras; Time to smile and go on with life.

    wallycat, Hang in there! As you can see there are women out there happy being flat and breast free!

  • romashka
    romashka Member Posts: 28

    Thank you my friends. You've all been there for me with information, support, and cat pics. 😊Very blessed to know you all in this way. 💜

  • Jujibean
    Jujibean Member Posts: 9

    Is anyone else out there who did recon and later went flat? I don't want my foobs after 6 months living with them. I am 60, slight frame but gaining weight quickly on letrozole. It also makes me sweat at night like an athlete doing a marathon. The foobs just trap the sweat in between. Real fun. I am 34DD. I really don't care what the scars look like cuz no one is goung to see them. So is it possible to correct dog ears if i get them after going flat?

  • lezza13
    lezza13 Member Posts: 579

    Jujibean I was going to do recon but changed my mind after the painful water fills needed. I had the expanders removed and foobs put in temporarily for 9 months. I was a teacher and had limited summer time off. The next summer I had the foobs removed and I have been flat for 7 years now. The scars do not make a woman for sure and I have never regretted my decision to go flat. I would think it is possible to correct dog ears as well. I had two revisions from my plastic surgeon just for her to get what I wanted being flat. So go for it! Don't worry about your decision since scars mean survival. Talk to your plastic surgeon about the dog ears issue. Best of luck

  • stauggie
    stauggie Member Posts: 23

    I am on the fence also. I finish chemo next month, so I will have to make a decision soon. I don't want implants, but am still considering DIEP fat grafting vs. going flat. I am almost 50, so I just don't know if I am going to have emotional repercussions to not having breasts. I really hate the thought of all the reconstruction and surgery though. So round and round I go.

  • Jujibean
    Jujibean Member Posts: 9

    thanks Lezza13 . i appreciate hearing about your experience. I figure it makes sense to go flat now because the older you get the less surgery you can tolerate. I wouldn't want to turn 75 and find the things are wearing out and need replacing but I am not a candidate for surgery.

    At the time I had the bilateral mast, i didn't want to look different. I was so upset about the cancer that i wanted recon to give me the outward appearance of normality so to speak. But all that has passed. One yr out from dx I have my life back and I am ready to get rid of them. Thank you. I feel more anchored in my decision.

  • Jujibean
    Jujibean Member Posts: 9

    StAuggie, you are younger, so you have a better shot at it than some. I think I was very lucky I had nothing go wrong. I was sedentary, probably not the greatest blood circulation, but it was Smooth sailing.. I have seen and heard what does go wrong. After surgery, the drains are there to remove as much fluid buildup as possible as the tissues heal from all that abuse. My drains stayed in 3 weeks, 4 of them. That was really the hardest part. The drains are truly vexing.

    Sometimes a seroma develops if the drains are taken out too soon. Or infection with fever, etc can put you back in hospital, the incision might not close, you could have some skin die off, called necrosis, if your skin doesn't have good blood flow. Not pretty.

    In your case, you get abdominal incisions too to harvest the graft...another site where infection or skin die off can occur. I didn't really understand what necrosis was all about untill after my mastectomy. It was obvious drs are worried the most about necrosis. My left incision looked iffy, etc. At 10 days, another check to see if the left is healing. Success depends mostly on the skin.

    All in all, a fantastic surgeon can't prevent necrosis if the body is unwilling. Now that I have lived with these implants for awhile, I have gotten over the feeling that I needed them. They are numb, so they have no role in sexual fulfillment anymore. Would it be awful to be naked in front of my spouse if I was flat? Umm, not very interesting to look at now , so for me going flat won't be much different.

    The bras with inserts look pretty good to me if I decide I want that. I am still uncertain I want to dress flat, but that will probably change too. Good luck to you too!!

  • BlueGirlRedState
    BlueGirlRedState Member Posts: 900

    StAuggie - I went the full circle reconstruction/going flat, and eventually went with going flat, and I'm fine with the decision. Implants&plastic were not encouraging, and I did not want to replace what I had with the same in plastic. Talked to a woman who went through this in her late twenties/early thirties, and she told me about fat grafting (DIEP), and was very pleased with the results. I was facing this at 60. Went to another state since it was not available where I live. As it turns out, I was not considered a good candidate (not the right kind of fat in the right places) and it was a more involved surgery/longer recovery than I had thought. I was looking at a bi-lateral (my decision). The surgeon thought I barely had enough fat and that they would be very small. You need a surgeon to make this evaluation. It is a very personal decision. Good luck with yours

    Exercise very regularly, if not at the gym, then walk/hike, weights, stretch, swim, x-country ski etc.

    Supplements: GAIA turmeric-joint; glucosamine-chondroitin; magnesium glycinate; biotin; potassium-iodine; low dose calcium; C; B-complex ; D; Fish oil (but not now). For a year or so after bi-lateral used Juven Nutritional therapy for wound healing with 7g arginine, 7g glutamine for about a year. Often add turmeric to meals. Ran out of fish oil supplement that I liked, other brand caused fish burps, so have not taken for a while

    2009 ER+ left breast. 52 yrs. Lumpectomy, Sentinel node removal, negative. Radiation 6 weeks, tamoxifen 5 years. Dense lumpy left breast, normal right. Acupuncture offered at facility as part of integrative medicine. It really helped with anxiety/stress during radiation treatment.

    2016 ER+ left breast. Probably a new cancer, but unknown. 4 rounds TC Aug-Oct 2016, Bi-lateral (my choice) Nov 2016, no reconstruction. 2 sentinel nodes remove, negative. Cold Capping using Chemo Cold Caps (DIGNICAP not available). Anastrozole 1 mg starting May 2017. Joint issues noticed immediately. Stopped Anastrozole after 3-4 months due to joint stiffness in. After several months of no AIs, fingers were feeling better. Started tamoxifen March 2018

    10/2018 noticed stiffness and some trigger finger again. Was eating meat a lot more (daily) than normal. Usually 1-2 /wk. Have cut way back on the meat, seems to help, but one finger still very prone to trigger finger. Trigger finger seemed to be getting better, but now 4/2019 seems worse, is it the break from added turmeric to meals?

    7/19/2019 - swelling in R-arm, opposite side from where lymph nodes removed. Noticed 6/18/2019. Could have been swelling earlier but wearing long sleeves. Trip to urgent care. They did ultrasound, concerned that there might be a clot, there was not. Started seeing lymphatic therapist 7/2/2019.