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Radiation December 2018

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  • LPLlibrarygirl
    LPLlibrarygirl Member Posts: 82
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    Pretty kitty, Wised. Your son knew just what his mama needed.

    Ghostie, glad you are safe at home and don't have to move off the couch.

    Cherry, where are you? Everything okay?

    TGIF and a restful weekend to all.

  • pebblesv
    pebblesv Member Posts: 486
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    lplibrarygirl - congrats on the good news! Oh I remember the anxiety of waiting for test results, glad that's all in the past for you now.

    Wised - OMG hello Calliope! What a good looking cat! So sorry you lost your soul cat too. Sending hugs, I know the devastation having lost little Kit Kat back in March. I pray that Domino and Tucker continue to be with me for years and years to come... (good news is Domino came through her vet check-up with flying colors, she is a healthy little one at 12 years young!)

    ghostie - I can't believe you were stranded at work with everything you're going through with treatment! You deserve an extra long curl up comfy home time goodness.

    Purplecat and Dani and others - I'm so glad our sharing the post-rads part is helpful! Yes there is definitely a light at the end of the tunnel. And I swear my breast is perkier post-rads than it was right after surgery, so maybe there is even a positive side effect too! I'll take it!

    Sending healing thoughts to everyone still going through or having finished rads.


  • purplecat
    purplecat Member Posts: 226
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    Salamandra, I totally agree about feeling better with untreated cancer!. I've gone so far as to say "if only I'd never gotten that stupid mammogram … " which of COURSE I don't really mean. We're almost done and will soon start climbing out of the pain and fatigue.

    LPLibrarygirl, so happy for your good news! What a tremendous relief on both counts.

    ghostie, hope you don't see this message for hours and hours because you are too busy sleeping with your heating pad and your kitties!

    Wised, what a beautiful cat!

    Enough patients opted out of today's extra Saturday session that they were able to move me into a late-morning timeframe, so now I won't have to spend my Saturday keeping an eye on the clock to get to a late-afternoon appointment, which makes me very happy. I had intended to sleep in until it was almost time to go, but was wide awake by 7, so now am having coffee in my bathrobe and starting to think about what I'd like to do with all my spare time once I don't have to go to radiation any more. I can't wait to get back to normal life, although there's also a sense that "normal" has a new definition.

  • Cherryi3
    Cherryi3 Member Posts: 45
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    Hi Gang, just popping in to see if anyone else will be joining me for a happy dance on NY eve? Last one! Sorry I don’t have much wisdom to share as I’m one of the lucky ones to breeze through. Just a little dark and patchy. Not too tired either. Thinking a lot about moving forward in January. Probably going to disappear from the discussions, take the dreaded pill, and put this in the past. Best wishes to you all!💕

  • egregious
    egregious Member Posts: 145
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    Hi Cherry,

    We are definitely up for celebrating with you as you finish your rads this coming week!

    Glad you’re feeling ok.

  • egregious
    egregious Member Posts: 145
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    New topic:

    For people starting or continuing rads in the new year

    Radiation January 2019


  • purplecat
    purplecat Member Posts: 226
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    Cherry - I will be joining you in that dance on that day!

  • wised
    wised Member Posts: 184
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    The fatigue is real. I need a housekeeper! Really, I'm more than two weeks out and finally am turning brown rather than red, but the fatigue is unrelenting.

  • ghostie13
    ghostie13 Member Posts: 39
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    Hugs Wised.....it does get better. Seems to have lifted quite a bit today, but I did sleep 12 hours last night....! Felt good after that long stretch of work. Have a short 6 hour shift tonight at my second job then 4 off!

  • salamandra
    salamandra Member Posts: 736
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    Wised you are such a hero for working through this. Truly, big respect to you.

    I'm so happy for your new cat creature! How is she settling in?

    My last day of treatment will be Jan 3, so just tipping over into 2019. But Cherry I'm so happy for your truly celebratory NYE!

    Purplecat I'm glad you could get in earlier today. The afternoons are when my fatigue sets in hard. I wonder if it depends on the timing of treatment? Generally I've been around 10:30am and by 5pm I'm a complete lump. Speaking of which, I better get out for groceries now while I still can...

    I had my first day of boosts yesterday. They drew a big circle around a section of my breast in magenta ink and told me to really really try not to wash it off or else Monday will be a very long treatment day again. It's already fading just from the creams and lotions so I'm thinking I better not shower all weekend!?! You'd think there would be a better technology for this. They also gave me gauze so it wouldn't stain my undershirt.

    I got a new machine and new techs for the boost. At first it was two men in the room, which took me aback - my previous techs were both women. But they were both kind and gentle and actually it was fine. And then part way through a woman came in and replaced one of them - from my weird upside down angle she looked like beautiful tv show character with white blonde hair, perfect red lipstick, and a dramatic black choker necklace. So all of a sudden the glamor value of radiation shot way up!

    I also had my weekly doctor check in. So ready to be done with my rad onc. The nurses are very nice. They said that the boost is a smaller area and lower dose so my breast could start healing even while its continuing. Also that I can increase the steroid cream and lotion to twice per day each instead of once per day each. Of course now I'm scared to wipe off my watermelon outline. Which they said I could reinforce with permanent marker if needed. WTH? Radiation is such a bizarre mix of low and high tech.

    Also for some weird reason I can't put my finger on I keep thinking about acquiring a Pomeranian. Why could that possibly be, I wonder? Loopy

  • dani444
    dani444 Member Posts: 215
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    Hello everyone!

    Wised- Very nice to meet Calliope, what a beautiful cat. It was so sweet how your son rescued the sweetie and that she found her way to your family! It was meant to be. I really hope your fatigue starts to lift soon. That is something I didn't expect to be so bad. I totally understand where you are coming from.

    Librarygirl. I am so glad for your good news, you deserve all of the good news! And you are almost done right? I hope the shoulder expert can resolve the issue for you. It sounds hopeful and glad they have you with the right specialist! That was thoughtful of your techs to call your RO to calm your fears.

    Ghostie- Glad you made it out, and I hope you are still curled under a blanket relaxing with the heating pad. That sounds like a truly sucky situation. Props to you, I think I would have gone crazy if I was stuck at work that long.

    Cherryi- I am so glad you are doing well, and wish you the best as you put this behind you. We are all pretty badass for going through this right? I hope for very few side effects for you with taking the dreaded pill! All the best to you in the coming year.

    My check up at the PS went well, she said some swelling, but she anticipated that. She said it doesn't look like it is putting any stress on my incision. I will see her two weeks post rads but she said to call anytime with concerns. She did also say the pain/tightness in my side is also to be expected due to the swelling.

    Just a random share, but at my job we are losing our physician group, most of these Doctors I have worked with for 23 years. Well it was the last shift with our most beloved Doctor last night. He is also a pathologist and he was one of the first people I went to after my diagnosis. He answered countless questions, and even spoke to some of his colleagues about my case when my nodes came back positive. He is one of the most caring physicians I have worked with. I failed at trying to convey how grateful I was for him due to crying so hard, all I could squeak out was thank you for everything.


  • pebblesv
    pebblesv Member Posts: 486
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    Salamandra Domino heard you lol, then jumped in the suitcase to say she’s on her way!

    Will post in more detail later... had to post this. (PS Wised I think we finished rads around the same time and last night I intended to pack and konked out at 8pm instead! What’s up with this fatigue 2+ weeks out?)

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  • egregious
    egregious Member Posts: 145
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    Hello all,

    My doctor said the heavy fatigue would linger for about a month. Nine days out, I'm finally able to hold my lunch without dropping it, but still get super tired mid-day.

    Dani that is very hard to lose trusted physicians, especially one you confided in during a difficult time. ((hugs))

  • purplecat
    purplecat Member Posts: 226
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    I'm so glad to be so near the end of radiation (last treatment is tomorrow!) but am finding myself surprisingly anxious about it. Maybe not that surprising, since I am prone to anxiety.

    Specifically, I'm afraid things I did might have messed up the treatment. I've been using Aquaphor on my nipple, following the instructions not to do so within two hours of treatment, but it's still been greasy by the time I've gotten to the treatment room. I asked the technicians if this was a problem and they said it was fine, so it probably is, but what if it ruined everything?

    I've also been really confused about antioxidants, which as a rule are a great idea but I keep hearing how they're supposed to be avoided during radiation. Was I supposed to be avoiding any foods containing antioxidants? I've been skipping my vitamin supplements just in case.

    I did ask about this before treatment started, whether there were any particular foods or supplements I should take or avoid, and they didn't indicate anything. I also remember the doctor telling me "It doesn't have to be perfect in order to work," which I've remembered in my anxious moments. I have one more check-in with him tomorrow, after the last session, and I could ask him all these questions, but what good would it do now that it's all over?

  • pebblesv
    pebblesv Member Posts: 486
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    Hi purplecat - Just wanted to provide some reassurance that I think you've been doing it fine. I was told to not take vitamins C, E and A but my multi vitamin and fish oil and vitamin D were all fine. So if you've been skipping yoir vitamin supplements during rads you've got that covered. And the radiation beams are strong, I think even if you have some lotion left on it's probably OK but see what your RO says!

    Congrats on almost being done too! Just a heads up to stay vigilant at least 2 weeks after with the lotion routine etc.

    Egregious - thanks for sharing that the fatigue can last for a whole month after! I think I'm feeling it now, but I didn't feel it during radiation. Maybe I was all primed during radiation and it got me through and now that I have a chance to “relax" a bit the body is saying OK need a break and it's hitting me now!

    Wised and ghostie and egregious you're not alone - I'm with one who skated through radiation with very few SEs and no fatigue and I'm really feeling that fatigue now too! Post-treatment! I say this as I type from my bed because I slept in this much.

    Dani - it's so nice you had such an amazing care team and I hope the new ones will be just as good!

    Wishing everyone a happy and healthy 2019!! Husband and I are on a weekend trip and it's a pup-inclusive one! Road trip with the paw family

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  • egregious
    egregious Member Posts: 145
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    Ten days post-rad, still very tired but I can see it s-l-o-w-l-y lifting. Sleeping better. A little headachy and my boob still gets zingers and has a sore nipple. This too shall pass.

    I asked my RO what was up with the two hour window of not using lotion before treatment. She said it was about not being too wet, that it might affect the marks or how the machine hits the marks. Hope I'm correctly conveying what she said.

    Re vitamins they specifically said it was good to keep taking my Vitamin D supplement which I need for bone loss. I think the ordinary vitamin pill was also ok but I wasn't listening as carefully to that since I only take the D.

    For what it's worth I've read about not taking *large* amounts of extra antioxidants in pills during rads. But any nutrients in food are ok.

    Sending hot cocoa and warm thoughts to you all!

  • Cherryi3
    Cherryi3 Member Posts: 45
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    It will be strange walking in to rads tomorrow for the last time. My techs are really cool chicks and I’ll miss them in a weird way. One got me hooked on binge watching Mrs Maisel. Just when I felt like this nightmare was coming to a close, I got the dreaded pink appointment reminder from my BS. I just want to be left alone for a good solid year. No poking or prodding or tests. Prior to this diagnosis I had a painful endometrial biopsy, a concerning colonoscopy and an ovarian cancer scare. I really just want to take care of myself without obsessing. Purple Cat, I feel ya although i feel strongly that you did everything just fine

  • pebblesv
    pebblesv Member Posts: 486
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    Cherry i3 - I’m in the same boat re: wanting to be left alone. Some people like and want all the appointments and I’m the opposite - would like no more scans, no more appts, just give me a chance to heal.


    So feeling you! If it helps, I had a visit with my oncologist after radiation treatment and was nervous they would want to do CT and bone scans all over again and it didn’t come up. Mostly we just talked about how I was doing, tamoxifen (next for me) and how often to check in after that which he said was once every 3 months and he does a physical breast exam but no more scans and biopsies of the breast feels fine (hopefully it will).

    So with you sister, I fully understand the appt anxiety and not wanting it.
  • wised
    wised Member Posts: 184
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    Pebbles and cherry, I am so over constant doctor visits and exams! Right now I'm seeing my MO every month for bloodwork and breast exams. After two cancers and a hysterectomy in 3 years I've had it! I just want to be normal again...

  • alicebastable
    alicebastable Member Posts: 1,944
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    I've enjoyed the last two weeks of NO APPOINTMENTS. January is a constant round with MO, urologist, BS, PCP, and a CT, plus all the bloodsucking vampire lab work with each. I'm exhausted just thinking about it. Oh, and a dental appointment, too! I may sleep through February.

  • purplecat
    purplecat Member Posts: 226
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    I had my last session yesterday! No bell to ring at my center but they gave me a certificate. :-) I feel relieved and so glad to be done, but also a little “now what?”
  • salamandra
    salamandra Member Posts: 736
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    Yay Purplecat!

    I can imagine it's a bit strange to be done. I'm starting to get nervous about going back to work.

    It feels like a chapter in our lives that is sorry of closing but sort of not closing, and wth do you do with that?

  • Cherryi3
    Cherryi3 Member Posts: 45
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    HNY Rads Girls! I had a little gong to ring and the team gave me a card. I was hoping for a sense of closure but they gave me an appointment date. So now I have RO, BS, and MO all coming up. I just want to walk out with my prescription and be done. Im looking for a job and getting back to my classes now. Maybe I’ll feel more done after those appointments.

  • pebblesv
    pebblesv Member Posts: 486
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    Congrats purplecat and cherryi3 on being done! Salamandra are you done too or almost done?

    First we feel like this at being done with rads:

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    Then we feel like this when we get reminded of all the appointments and follow ups we still have (Wised and AliceBastab feeling you, so over the appointments):

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    There’s a little bit of a sense of normalcy back which is good, but then still this constant reminder esp with the nerve-wrecking appointments. I don’t know if we’re ever done but those on the boards who have been years NED say it’s further and further in the rear view mirror...

  • Spoonie77
    Spoonie77 Member Posts: 532
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    Just stopping in to say hi. Congrats to everyone that's finished and hanging in there down the home stretch. <3

    Sending lots of healing and gentle hugs to you all as we journey into 2019!

    Wised - Callopie (great name!) is beautiful! So thankful you and he are in things together. Rescuing a furbaby is just the best! Gypsy is my rescue as well. May the bond you two form be something special and unwavering through the years. It will never be what you had with your last love, but it will be special on its own. I miss my Onyx everyday but Ari has made a room in my heart that will always be hers too.

    Heart

    My first love, my furbaby forever, Onyx (part ragdoll/maine coon). He passed away in 2015 and I thought I'd die of a broken heart. Thankfully Ari and Gypsy came along and with time healed the cracks.

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    ^ This was Ari 4 years ago today and this is her today.....a new year's baby.....12 lbs bigger and a ton of FLOOF floofier!!

    Happy Birthday my little Silver Princess! <3


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  • LPLlibrarygirl
    LPLlibrarygirl Member Posts: 82
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    Beautiful cats and dogs everyone! Animals bring such comfort and fun. We had a cat and two dogs when the kids were growing up. After heartbreaking losses we decided not to have any more pets. After being on this website I certainly brought up the subject again but my husband doesn't want to go there right now. I will say that chickens aren't the perfect substitute, but they do kind of become pets! (Note: they live in a coop outdoors but try to follow me in the house!)

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    Congrats to Purple Cat and Cherry! I finished yesterday too. I got a "diploma" but my hospital doesn't have a bell. I was surprised that I was teary saying goodbye. The feeling of finishing is weird and hard to describe. Yes, relieved and happy to be done, but it almost seems like there should be some transition back into life. I have an appointment with MO in February to start AI and they said I would see my BS in May and have another mammogram then. And that was it! I did sign up for a bc exercise class that is held once a week and starts tomorrow. I figure it will be good for the exercise and local support.

    PurpleCat-the anxiety you wrote about is a big deal with me. I figure that probably had a lot to do with getting me into this mess. I worry about everything. My doc recommended me for some counseling to go along with the medicine I take.

    Salamandra-it was interesting to read about the circle that was drawn on you for your boosts. My techs used the "clips" that were inserted when I got the core biopsies to guide the treatment. I had the same room, same machine and same techs.

    Wised, Pebbles, Alice, Cherry...you've all said how you want to be done and I have said that too. I tell people all the time I just want my old life back. But somehow I am not sure that is going to ever happen. I read somewhere that cancer is really a chronic disease. I know I will question every decision I have had to make and every pain or twinge I will feel and I will keep reading about ILC and implications of PR- and on and on. On one hand I want to have no more appointments and no more thoughts about cancer and on the otherhand, after months of steady appointments and treatments, I feel like I still need a hospital lifeline.

    I am scheduled to work 3 hours at the library on Friday morning, so maybe that is the first step of being normal. Then I will come home and take a nap!

    Best Wishes for a happy, healthy New Year!

  • alicebastable
    alicebastable Member Posts: 1,944
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    Nice chickens!

    I think that unless you have Stage III or IV, cancer is NOT a chronic disease except in the sense of having to take medication for 5 to 10 years. But I don't see it as some dark, threatening cloud hanging over my head at all times, just an annoyance like my arthritis, low-grade diabetes, or borderline blood pressure issues. They're controlled with meds, I make a few fairly minor adjustments, and don't think about them much otherwise. I certainly don't go all gloom and doom over them! What is it about the word "cancer" that grabs people emotionally, so much more than other ailments? I'd be much more freaked out over heart or lung diseases, or one of the many neuro-muscular diseases. Now those are chronic ailments that actually have an impact on daily life.

  • purplecat
    purplecat Member Posts: 226
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    Pebbles and Domino, I love it! You should collect up all your Domino posts and make them into a book to encourage women through treatment. I'd buy it!


  • egregious
    egregious Member Posts: 145
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    PurpleCat and Cherry and Library,

    CONGRATULATIONS!!!

    YOU DID IT!!!

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    At our hospital there wasn't a bell or diploma but I did rather loudly sing Pomp and Circumstance as I came down the echo-y hall for the last treatment.

  • Cherryi3
    Cherryi3 Member Posts: 45
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    OK I now have a serious case of cat envy. Chickens too but what would I do with them when I’m on a road trip?

    Alice, you raise a good point about the black cloud. Personally, I watched my father die a slow miserable cancer death, so the diagnosis has been very triggering for me and has brought some of my very worst fears to reality. But you are right to remind us that this is manageable and will not be at the forefront of our lives much longer