Pissed off.
I was recently diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma. I've decided if this can come back, I want a double mastectomy. My mother in law asks me what does your husband think of that? My response, he is supporting me in whatever I decided to do. Then she says, Remember we're all going through this. I want to say NO YOUR NOT ALL GOING THROUGH THIS. MAYBE SOME EMOTIONS. But I'm going through this physically, emotionally and spiritually. I feel like she has no right to say this until she has been in my shoes. Like I'm supposed to take everyone else's feelings into my decision making. I'm so pissed!!
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@momoftwo1982 I am so sorry to hear about your recent diagnosis. I am sending you a virtual hug!🤗 It is very difficult dealing with all of the emotions and decisions when first diagnosed. Hopefully, you can gather data on all options and make a decision that works best for you. As you stated, you are ultimately the one who is going through all of this. I guess I am fortunate in that my relatives did not give me advice on what I should or shouldn't do.
I wish you all the best on your journey.
Hugs,
Pam
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Thank you. I think I'm still trying to wrap my head around all of this. I hope you and your are doing well.🩷
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@momoftwo1982, This journey has some very bumpy roads ahead, but they do smooth out eventually. Do what you can to pamper yourself. You deserve it!
Pam
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Hi @momoftwo1982. I’m so sorry to hear about your new diagnosis. And anyone in your life making it all about them. This is a safe place to vent (also there’s this thread below for venting). Hang in there!! It’s okay if you have nothing in you right now to comfort and reassure others. You are having to make difficult decisions and no one else has to live in your body with the results of those decisions so they don’t get any say and they should keep their opinions to themselves (besides our husbands being able to help us make the decisions, but I was grateful mine never once voiced an opinion, he just supported me). Just ugh! I’m sorry. I can appreciate why that made you feel angry. I feel angry for you. We’re here for you!!
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Thank you. My husband also supports me in whatever I decide to do. 🩷 Have a good evening.
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the last thing you need is that type of narcissistic comment from your MIL. SHE isn’t the one going through BC. Glad your husband is supportive and hopefully he can get his mother to act better. Your body, your choice. I personally decided to have immediate DIEP flap recon when I had a BMX - that was what I wanted and did it despite my husband and sister expressing concern because it’s pretty major. they expressed their concerns once, I listened then told them that my mind was made up and thankfully they didn’t bring it up again and were simply supportive of my decision. I hope you’ll experience the same with whatever you decide re: treatment, including recon or not. My best wishes to you.
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Thank you. She hasn't said it again. She took me to my mri yesterday and was very helpful.
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@momoftwo1982 So glad to hear that your MIL has changed her tune and is being supportive. Wishing you continued support from family and friends. We here at BCO are with you as well. Keep us posted on your progress!
Hugs,
Pam
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Like Pam said really glad MIL is being supportive, a real blessing to have your family there for you!
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