Illinois ladies facing bc
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Hi Girls... this is great! I'm at the Ford dealer having a part replaced on my suv... this place is great - they have internet available and free beverages! lol
Sure does make the time go fast! Hope you're all having a nice day. I'll check back later.
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Jackie...Thanks and know it helps put things in perspective. This is my good week and love that i can read with some clarity and GET IT!!! You have been thru alot too and it is very interesting to see where you are today.Such Hope!!!!
MamaQ..When i was told i was goin to have chemo, the first thing i said to the Dr was..will i loose my Hair?? NOT..will i be cured?!!This was the hardest part for me and still is. The thing is, it was ok when it was time to loose it. IT was part of the jounrey and somewhere along the way,I had already accepted it and buzzed it as i already had a GI Jane cut before i started chemo.All i hear is, your hair grows back and better and thicker or more curlier. I wear my wig and have a few and it is what it is.Does not mean i like it, but it is ok and you can blend in! I too do not like to stand out either. I would suggest you get your wig now and get this out of the way.Did you locate TLC website yet? The wigs worked well for me. See what others suggest here!!!!
Buddy..Had similar situations and realize that their current situations or cancer with loved ones will take precedence over us because they are so fear based!
Be safe in this crazy weather..
Donna
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Jackie...LOVE how you worded it for MamaQ on wigs and loosing hair..how true!!See how you share and help others like us newbies... you rock...lol.
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Jackie- I hate when that happens to my posts too. I have called about the Look Good...Feel Better but I think I waited too long. The only one that is anytime soon, was suppose to be tomorrow. The didn't have anyone signed up,so they were not going to run it. And they don't do individual sessions. The next one, in our area, is not until June 26th. I will call for that one tomorrow, because better late then never. I've never been a big make-up wearer but I do realize that I will probably need to change that. Thanks for reminding me why I'm going through this in the first place.
Donna- Your story made me realize that I'm not the only one, and that makes me feel not so bad. I did get a wig from TLC, the Olivia it's called. Looks a lot like my hair now. My two year old actually saw the picture and said "Mommy." Which is such a compliment, if you saw the lady. I tried it on. Can't say I was crazy about it, but I think that's because I don't need it yet. Does that make sense? Will I like it more, when I need it more?
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BJ - Again, my sympathies for the loss of your friend. As sad as it must be for you, you seem to have a lovely perspective on it all.
Rita - Good luck in Vegas! I'm totally jealous. I have a work trip to Nashville in October, but that just doesn't have the same appeal as Vegas. I think a weekend getaway in the fall is in order.
Jackie - GOOD FOR YOU, for speaking up to that creepy sounding neighbor. Too many people would have just ignored that poor animal's cries.
JulieC. - Glad to hear you got through the GI tests. Your story about still being conscious for the endo is freaking me out. I've been battling really uncomfortable heartburn for a few months now. I'm at the point of needing to see a GI doc and probably get scoped. I'm definitely NOT looking forward to this. *gag*
MamaQ - When I attended the Look Good Feel Better session, there was a wide range of women - some like me who were very familiar with make-up, and a few who never wore it at all. I found that some of my biggest concerns about losing my eyebrows and eyelashes ended up not being as difficult to conceal as I thought they would be. Having bangs did help with the eyebrows, but they fell out in waves, as opposed to all at once, and they came back faster than the hair on my head. There are wonderful eyebrow kits out there that work beautifully.
The eyelashes don't fall out until after chemo, and they came back even quicker. A little eyeliner pencil smudged along the top and bottom lids and it wasn't nearly as traumatizing as I thought it would be. I never ended up using the false eyelashes that I had bought in anticipation of needing them. My eyelashes continued falling out in waves several times over after the initial time, but each time they came back very quickly.
The hair is a different story. I won't lie - it is traumatizing. But...as everyone has said, it DOES come back, and it's being lost for a VERY GOOD cause - to help you battle this disease. It's been 3.5 years since I wore my wig, but sometimes I will take it out and look at it. I'm too superstitious to throw it away. It does seem like a long time ago now, and I'm past being bitter about it. I'm glad to have gotten past that very difficult time, but I'm also grateful that I have these options available to me to help me fight this. Good luck to you.
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MamaQ.. I have the Olivia wig too.My hair was a little shorter than the wig, but that is the style I wanted to grow into!!! You are ahead of the game. Now you can just focus on your treatments!Your son sounds so sweet and supportive!!!!JUne 26th for the Feel Good Seminar may be good timing as it will give you some times to see what your needs may be and need some help in a specific area?!
Rene23...Your info on the brows and eyelashes have been insightful, as i have lost some eyelashes.. eyelashes can still fall out after the treatments. Eyebrows still pretty much intact, but imagine they could be affected after my last treatment also? I too would probably hold onto the wigs too as a superstitious thing!!!
Hope ALL are well today and rain rain go away!!!
Donna
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Rene- I was wondering about the eyebrows and eyelashes. The wig I got has bangs so I was hoping that this helps with the eyebrows. Especially because I have very thick eyebrows. Think Brooke Shields. I had heard that Sephora has good false eyebrows. Have you heard of any good ones? Thanks for the eyelash info, I did not know that they fell out afterwards. I might have thought I was out of the woods and then been really shook when they fell out. That might have been SCAREY, so thanks.
Donna- The Olivia looks like my hair, if I actually could get it as straight as I am suppose to. I have a wave to my hair and never seem to get it to look like the beautician does. I hadn't thought of going to the LGFB seminar like that. It will give me time to understand what I need to know. It will be the day after tx #2. Do you think that will be a problem? Any helpful hints about getting through chemo?
Jo
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Good morning everyone
Jo, Rene' & Donna, -great information you are passing around. I don't have much for helpful hints on getting through chemo, but like so many of the girls said when I was doing mine...whatever they give you to combat side effects ( known as se's ) you may want to just start it even though you won't or don't feel nausea lets say..I say this because I had not felt nausea since early pregnancy days ( hundreds of years back ) and had forgotten exactly what it felt like and so I spent my first four chemo's losing lots of what I ate....and drank. It is easier to handle it before it happens....so take the meds before you even feel it. Drink as much as you can....especially during and after your tx ( treatment ) as you need to wash as much of the excess chemo out as you can. You will learn to listen to your body and sometimes it will tell you to rest and you need to do that. If anyone offers you help be ready and willing to take it. I did not do this....I'm making up for it now....it is not a good time to be SUPER-PERSON....
We all got through.....even if we had some ragged times. I'd turn right around and do this all again **dragging my feet a bit for sure** if I had too. I did all I could to get a complete KNOCK-DOWN in the first round so I would not have to "suffer" anything else and that is the way I look at things now.....I have done my time....and won't have to do anymore.
Having a sunny morning although it sounds like rain for the Chicago area. Wendy the weather lady is late today....or maybe it's too wet to go out and check the rain gauge.
I'll catch up with all of you later.
Hugs,
Jackie
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Jackie- I will listen about the nausea meds. I had nausea for 81/2 months with my first baby and it was not fun. I think the "Knock-Down 1ST Round Thing" is the only thing that is keeping me going through all this. As, for the accepting help, I'm trying, it's not that easy when you are kind of a control freak. But I'm working on it. DH will be happy if I learn to let a little of that go.
Jo
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Morning! OK...what the heck is up with this weather???? 82 last night and humid, 48 and pouring this morning. Yuck.Donna/Buddy/Jo...you've all been given great advice with re: to the hair loss. Yep - first thing I asked...not - will this cure me but...will my hair fall out? I lost my lashes and brows in waves as well so I always had somethng to work with. BUT.....your brows and lashes grow differently that other body hair - in three month cycles - and then they fall out naturally. Otherwise we would have 3 foot long lashes! They can continue to fall out numerous times, even a year AFTER chemo ends. This did happen to me - 4 times! And..now over 2 years out from chemo I have noticed in the past 2 weeks the brows and lashes are once again thnning out rapidly. BUT....I already see the new little sprouts. So don't be surprised if this happens. It's normal. And what Rene said about the eyeliner is sooooo true! You can't even tell you don't have lashes! Really! Unless of course someone is less than a foot away. Look at women with some eye makeup on from a small distance...can't see her lashes, can you!!!!!! I just penciled in some brows and wore a wig with a bit of bang. It was fine. Wigs.com and Headcovers.com does have some stick-on human hair brows tho - and they are really not the costly. Check it out - but wait to see what happens first. You may be "pleasantly" surprised how much you can truly do with makeup.
And yep.....Jo...take all the anti-nausea meds before you need them. Much easier to prevent the nausea than to treat it.
Well....I think I have decided against the bifocal lenses. It works great in my L but by R - not so much. And by 2-3pm, they are uncomfortable whereas the accuvue's I sleep in - never notice them at all! But I need a little rx tweaking as the R is a bit over-corrected. So Laura....that's what I went with. While I can see better, both for distance and reading with the bifocals, the comfort level won out. Get a trial pair and wear them for a week. Rita loves hers!
Just watching it POUR outside. I was going to run some errands this am, but came straight home after the gym. I have to go back to the eye doc at 1:15 so maybe it will be better then.
Stay dry, and warm! Brrrrrrrrrr.........
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Jo....good. I too have always hated to ask for help and I didn't going thru my 6 mos. of chemo. Dh though a rare jewel about so many things, did not do much around the house. True he was working etc --- but we ladies work too, and do the house as well. Essentially ( and just between us gals ) no one was really doing anything here. I could not keep up....and though Dh thought taking out the trash and putting some dishes in the sink ( which I later rinsed and put in the dishwasher -- and thank goodness we have one ) constituted cleaning. I did bare minimums...when I could --- but no good or deep cleaning took place.
I do appreciate the fact of having a reluctance to get help. As well, I cleaned houses for a living for several years and it is very difficult for me to watch anyone --- even someone wanting to help me load the dishwasher after a family dinner -- do things in my house. It's not because I think I do it better......it is just something about feeling it's my job and no matter how bad I feel or felt ---- I would still feel dis-comfort sitting around while watching someone do MY work. Guess it makes me feel like a slacker......and it's harder yet if you don't look *SICK* to have someone bustling around.
See ya's later.
Jackie
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I am putting in a couple quotes today....mainly as they were both together. I think I have had the Mel Brooks one in here before....but it's humorous and true....and humor is always welcome here.
Good, better, best. Never let it rest until your
good is better and your better is best!
- UnknownHope for the Best. Expect the worst Life is a play. We're unrehearsed
- Mel BrooksHugs,
Jackie
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Hey girls... please pray for my dear friend, Paula, she is starting chemo tomorrow AGAIN for mets!... she and I met here when we joined an Oct 2005 chemo group. We have become very good friends. In fact, I've adopted Paula as my little sister... she lives in Australia, but she has visited me here and we vacationed together in Las Vegas last May.... I think the world of her. We were diagnosed at the same time and had similar diagnoses... I still cannot believe she got mets... lungs and bones. It's only been 3 years! I'm heart broken...she is now only 33 years old... my heart is broken... her new tumors are massive. One of them was pressing on her spinal cord... she is in a rehab hospital - and is learning to walk once again. Please...I can't tell you how much this saddens me. I want Paula to be having fun and enjoying her 30's like I did... Here's she and I in Las Vegas last May - we had so much fun!:
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Laura- Of course, she has already been in my prayers. I will double them, though. You are in my thoughts and prayers too.
Jo
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Laura-what a beautiful picture. May she find strength and comfort in knowing that she has family and friends (and those of us who don't know her)praying for her.
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Laura, it so hard. I praise you for being the good friend who stays through the the good and through the not so good times. You, my dear, are a good friend. Those who pray, do better praying when they know more about the lovely person we are praying for. Tell us more about Paula (her interests, perhaps her work, her family, if she has pets, and her personality, whatrever.
Susan
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Good Morning! 50 on the deck, with cloudy skies but dry.Laura....please send this hug to Paula. Tell her she has all of us here in Illinois, praying for her. I know a cure for cancer is still a long way off but please, oh please God, help us to find that one magic pill that we can take that keeps us if not cured, then treated - for many happy years. Please? If she would like it, maybe you could share her address, or we could send maybe a card or two to you and you could forward?
Jackie...I think you brought up something that I never really thought about! I spent so much time tryng to prove to everyone that I was just fine, looked fine, acted fine - then what exactly did I expect when no one offered to help???? I looked like I didn't need any! So....chemo girls heads up! Don't do it all yourselves. Ask for help. If someone offers to do ANYTHING, say "wonderful!" and let them do it. It doesn't mean that you aren't a strong woman and can't fight - just means you are willling to share your "burden". If the tables were turned, wouldn't you step up and help? Of course you would!
Susan...only a few more days! You and BJ must not have had any snow days! DH's kids don't get out until after 1.5 hours next Wednesday! DH says tho that he thinks the kids have checked out pretty much anyway!
Blackjack....how are you feeling these days? You never really said if that burning had gotten better. Sure hope so....you surley don't need to lose any more weight!
Juliet...OK, OK...I know you are now a "working girl" but we miss you! You always have something sunny and happy to say to those of us who are down. Please come back when you have a miniute!
Mich101...did you ever check out Green Lake for your vacay?
I have a hair appt at 8 to get pretty so I better get to doing something constructive. Each time I go it's seems it takes a little bit longer to get "pretty" - look for me around 2pm........
Great day to all....sunny days!
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Laura..Praying for Paula and you guys look close!!! My heart goes out for you as it is so hard when you are just wanting it all to be ok and you feel powerless. Being a friend and sister by heart is everything. She is do darn young!!!
JO..You already have some great advice and support info from Wendy and Jackie... and all, i just had a chance to look at somepages in my cancer journal that I have started since my DX.There a few pages , week before surgery where i was all torked out thinking how my house and chores would get done. Having no family here, my husband would be the main help!!As it went and as it is now.. i have learned alot and you will hopefully see this..It is all not so important!!!For me, It is all the process of letting go!!!! It is almost a lesson for me in this journey, that my control and (me anal!!!) keeping everything in order 24/7 is not will be important. Taking care of yourself is what will be most impt!!!All the things i was worried about prior to surgery and then chemo... just all worked out and there was no more worry on it as it is going to be other priorities that will be more impt and spending time with your family etc.
As far as help goes., you never know who will show up or someone decides they want to help. Remember, they are offering a gift to you and if you don't accept that gift, they will feel rejected.
Good luck tomm and know we are here!!!
Hope everyone is well and staying warm from this crazy weather!!
Love and hugs..
Donna
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Laura - prayers coming for Paula. What a great picture of the two of you. My heart breaks with you as no one should have to go through this.
My kids are out of school on Monday (after an hour). This week is all fun and games. DD is going to the zoo today.
I had my annual MRI last Thursday. Everything seemed to go fine. I haven't heard anything yet, so I assume no news is good news.
Have a great day everyone!
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Donna- A gift... Um, never thought of it like that... I think that puts a whole new twist on it. I like that. I'll just have to graciously accept and I'll just make sure I pass it on, next time, when someone else needs it. Pay it Forward, as they say.
Hope everyone has a great day. I will, its one of my favorite days, I married my best friend, 14 years ago. I know... sappy.
Jo
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Graduation was last night. I read the names as I am retiring. That was tricky as we have many Asians kids with very tricky names. I did fine as I had practiced, This is my last one! Everything is the last one. I feel good about retiring....no regrets at all. I just wish I could move the very long good-bye to be a bit less long!
Laura, I had to go back and edit my post as I had so many typos....not good for a woman who taught English for so many years. Paula is beautiful. I know this is very hard on you. I have been trying to wrap my head around cancer cells and how violent they are. It is hard for me understand that something so very tiny can become so powerful and so controlling that it just invades our bodies and detsroys us from within.
Have a good day!
Susan
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Happy Anniversary Jo and Dh. I'm ordering a great day for you so relax and enjoy whatever you do. Hope all those warm, wonderful memories are sitting right on top your memory box of treasures.
It maybe a little sappy but I bet we are all afflicted with that same malady....and who would have it any other way.
I too will pray for Paula. We have known for a long time that this is an extraordinarily un-fair disease and so often no rhyme or reason to who gets what kind or who might get a spread. I will pray that she is able to find huge control possible . I loved Wendy's idea about the cards.
Donna - It is so true that houses and housework end up taking a back-seat to taking care of yourself. I can attest to that. I did extremely minimal things here........and it so kindly waited for me to get over the hump.....and no one cared at all. And you are so right....people do want to help and it is a way of them giving a gift to you --- one unlike flowers that wilt, or food that might spoil ( because your tummy is off ). I do feel one of the greatest gifts we get to give is our help to someone who is temporarily having some difficulties in their everyday routines. Who has lost their strength for just awhile.
We are having rain again today --- the rain is not so bad --- it's the gray that bugs me.
Hope you all have a good day......dry if possible. I'll be checking back later.
Hugs,
Jackie
p.s. BTW -- I like the recent changes to the blog. Had this been here when I first started I'd have found a lot of info quickly. Took me some time to feel comfortable using the listings from the top.l
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"Every decision you make - every decision - is not a decision about what to do. It's a decision about *Who You Are*. When you see this, when you understand it, everything changes. You begin to see life in a new way. All events, occurrences, and situations turn into opportunities to do what you came here to do." Neale Donald Walsch
for those of you not familiar with Neale Donald Walsch....he is the author that has the "Conversations with God" series. Good books.
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Hi Gals, Do any of you know anyone who had their chemo sessions interrupted for a long period of time (1-3 months) like me. It has just occured to me that I might want a second opinion on chemo tx.. Right after surgery my Oncolgist kept saying he did not know how he was going to treat me for the missed sessions. Finall y he decided that maybe rads is the answer. Like I had mentioned before. In the beginning he was against rads. I think I need a second opinion on both radiation and the missed chemo treaatments. Any thoughts.
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Buddy.... Personally, I would do a second opinion as there is too much conflicting info.radiation, no radiation.. etc. Maybe a fresh perspective would be needed. Do you have any good referred Drs to call on? It sounds like your heart is telling you to do this 2nd opinion too. Feeling of the gut is usually my way of doin something that is troubling me.
Susan....Congrad's!!! You did it!!!Now life can be enjoyed and know you did real good as a teacher and now it is time for you!!!!Look forward to hearing about your outings and trouble you may get into!!!
JO...Congrad's on ypur anniversary!!!NOT SAPPY!!! Nice to have that kind of good news and celelbration... ours is in July and it is a very special time for both as we are best friends too. You may see you are closer as you go thru this BC journey also!!! BTW..Not sure how your first treatment goes to see if you can handle the Feel Good Seminar the day after. Play it by ear.
My turkey meat loaf is baking. Have a good evening.
Donna
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Yum. What times dinner?
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Buddy-I vote with Donna. I would definitely get another opinion. I'm sure you started out with the same viewpoint we all had.....do everything possible to eradicate all cancer anywhere and everywhere. A big part of that was the chemo regime which you had to stop. I think I would feel major discomfort about receiving medical advice which says no radiation....and then a big turn-around when you are unable to finish the full set of chemo txs. I just find it hard to believe.....if your body was not suitable for radiation then......how did it get suitable in the interim. I feel I can see part of the idea.....of covering you more fully than they were able to with the chemo....but would not a milder chemo done now to completion do enough to get you where you need to be **without** radiation at all. You have come this far....I would definitely want those answers.
I would not want to go through all you have and come up short because you had questions you might have been able to find answers for. You'd think Donna has at least one more place setting for me.
Donna - when is your anniversary.....mine is Julyl 29th. It will be 34. Long time so we might as well hang in there for another 34. I also have a son born in July on the 27th. and my daughter was born on July 12th. July is a great month for me.....lots of big events including the 4th. to celebrate.
See you all later.
Hugs,
Jackie
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Jo, I am behind on posts and just read your post about mastectomy fear versus hair loss fear. I think the mastectomy (lumpectomy or whatever) is a private thing, while the hair loss is publicly out there that you have cancer and wow it changes your facade. I too was less afraid of surgery than I was of losing the hair. I covered my chest with a loose shirt; while I covered the bald head with a wig and like Connie, I hated my wig. People told me my wig was better than my "regular" hair. They were probably right in that the wig was stylish. My hair loss was my my most frightening loss because of cancer. I am so thankful that it was temporary and I now have my less than stylish real hair on my head. Our culture is very much centered on hair. Some of us older girls will remember a musical that was called "HAIR" and it was darn important. Good luck, and know the hair comes back!
Susan
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Illinoislady Oh my gosh you hit it on the head. You know exactly what I am saying. Yes that is it. It feels good for someone to understand me. I just hope I can get a referral for a second opinion for another Oncologist from my Primary. Thank you again Illinoislady
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Buddy- I agree with Donna about the second opinion. It definately is a great option. If you have any questions it is best to follow up with another person. And I always trust my gut. It was a hard learned lesson for me.
Donna- Thanks for the anniversary wishes. Someone told me and DH that not only do you have to love each other but you need to like each other as well. And after 14 years, I agree. About the Feel Good seminar, I was thinking the same thing. I figured I'd sign up but cancel if I had to.
WELL, my first tx is tomorrow. I'm feeling pretty good. Think I'm just ready to get this part going, so I can be done. Does that make sense? I'll let you know how it goes. Wish me luck, and send me some of your strength, my tough Illinois friends. I will follow your examples.
Jo
P.S. I'll probably be back soon, scared out of my wits! LOL
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