Illinois ladies facing bc
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OH NEVER MIND!!!!!!! I am soooo sorry. I will now find something else to do.
And stop laughing at me....I hear you, you know!
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zap,could you please tell me the auther of undressing the moon, I am a avid reader and love to read new books, this sound very interesting. blackjack
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OK....now? I promise I really will stop after this. As you can see....it is a slow morning around here.(And I can stilll hear you laughing....Pat, I can hear you too you know!)
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YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(as you can see, I am easily amused...ok...done now)
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Hi Everyone,
I'm from Centralia Illinois and a newbie and had just posted a question when I saw below something about Illinois ladies with breast cancer. I think I never ceased to be amazed at my propensity for being in a hurry and missing something fantastic. I hope it's not too late to join all of you. I am not very computer literate though so something to keep in mind. I have been using my name, IllinoisLady for some time and wonderful to find some place where it really fits.
Best to all,
IllinoisLady
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Welcome Illinios Lady, I too am new to this site and I have to tell you these ladies posts are wonderful to read. They have great info to share and are really supportive of each other. As a new bc girl I find that everyone on this site is very knowledgable about their own disease and are willing to share info and words of insipration to all women w/bc out there in cyber space. Thank you to all bc girls out there for helping us new bc girls deal with our own fears and disease. Blackjack
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Thanks Blackjack. I do know from this and another forum that it's probably one of the only ways I will get through this. I talked to another gal in Illinois and she and I both agree that no one, not even your close family can really GET where you are with something like this albatross around your neck. It's very personal. We are I'm sure fortunate that so many others have come before and are willing to share and help the rest of this through. Like many I'm sure I have gotten this as a slightly older person.......just at that time of life when I was happily getting to do so many of those things you 'mean' to when life settles down. This is definitely not one of my 'mean too' items and I hate having to make room for it, but I will just remember my saying from long ago....if you want me down you'll just have to keep hitting me til' I don't get up anymore because I'll never willingly quit.
All the best to you,
IllinoisLady
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Welcome IllinoisLady. You're in the right place. These ladies are so supportive and knowledgeable, and always there for you.
Wecome too, Blackjack.
Susan Hope you feel better soon, though if you have to have a cold, this is a good weekend for cocooning. Brrrrrr....it's so cold out there. I too loved The Kiterunner, and I'm looking forward to the next one. By the way, I think your curly locks are beautiful!
Jan Thanks so much for the yummy chocolates. What a treat! I agree that it would be fun to meet a few times a year at least.
Laura I see on another thread that you have been busy sending a shirt to another bc lady. What a nice thing to do! You are the best!
Your centerpiece is beautiful. Thoughtful and talented!
Rita I'd hire you in a minute! Your energy is amazing, and I agree that kids need people like you.
Kater I hope you are finding a tx plan for your mom. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.
Michele Your hair looks so cute! I know what you mean when you just happen to pass a mirror, and say to yourself, wow, that's me! I was frequently startled by the sight of myself.
Connie So glad to meet you! Hope rads continue to go well for you. Soon you'll be a rad grad!
Also so nice to meet Mary Jane and JoAnna. It was such a nice gathering, and I do hope we get to do it again.
I decided against the seminar because of the weather prediction, and it has already started snowing here. I may go over to Old Orchard {five minutes away} as I have no gifts for the holidays yet.
Wendy You graphic is very cute. You are way ahead of me, because I don't have a clue about how to post one!
Pat G.
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Blackjack- if you are reading this before leaving for the seminar- I hope we catch you. Michelle and I have cancelled out. I'm not usually a wimp about snow, but I left my house and drove only about 2 miles before turning around when Michelle called. The traffic was crawling and the streets are just too icy!
It's possible Kater will be at the seminar, she was shopping in the area, but it was probably going to take me an hour to get to Crystal Lake and I was afraid of what it would be like coming out afterwards.
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I just made it home too! It was too slippery for me! Maybe they'll hold it again because of the weather.
Blackjack, if you go, Kater will be looking for you.
Jan- forgot to say thanks for the chocolates.
Laura-Thanks for sharing your coupons with us! Your centerpiece looks great!
Maryjane-It was so nice to meet you. I am going to look on the Komen site for the beautiful sweater you had on. Hope we see you at the next gathering.
Connie-It was nice to have met you! Hoping rads continues to go well for you.
Wishing everyone a nice day!
Michele
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Hi girls....just got back from a quickie lunch at Chili's....roads are VERY slippery but now it seems to have stopped.
Smerf....only took me a few hours to figure out how to do the graphic thing....PM me if you want and I will walk you thru it. A double major in nursing and physics had to be good for something!
Blackjack and Illinoislady...I am sure that reading my posts from this morning you are wondering if you are at the right spot. Yep...you are. This thread is wonderful. When I think back about where I was one year ago, sitting under my kitchen table and sobbing as soon as my DH left for work (yep...I did that) and now I am consumed with how to post a graphic on my post...I never thought I would be here. Time heals as do the wonderful friends I have found here. BC will always remain in our heads but it has faded for me this past year and I for one, one year ago, if you had told me that I would have told you that you were plumb crazy. It is still there every day, every hour but no longer every minute and for that I am grateful.
Well....off to the BD party down Lake Street.....wish us safe driving! Hey Pat.....great day to be at home, isn't it? Hugs and smiles!
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Welcome to the new people. You don't need to be computer literate to communicate on this thread. All you need to have is breast cancer and be a resident of Illinois. OHHHH, that is not funny.
The author is Tammy Greenwood (Undressing the Moon) and I loved it! The subject is dark (the character has metastatic cancer) yet the message is wonderful and joyful.
Also, you are a not slightly older woman as you are only three years older than I am and I am a much younger woman (I think my cabin fever with this cold is getting to me). The snow is actually gorgeous.
Wendy, you are so funny. You sat under the kitchen table? Why the kitchen table? Any good reason. Were you going to fetch something and just had the meltdown under the table? I had my meltdown on a Friday afternoon, sitting on the ledge of the bathtub and combing all my hair out and putting it all in a Nordstrum's shopping bag. My husband, who is actually the sweetest person I know, had warned me to be careful not to clog the drain. He is so practical and that's how he copes. It works.
I was so sad and it all then became so real.
I am now one year plus out and doing great (well, mostly great). So, new ladies, you came to the right place. It will take me awhile to figure out which one of you is which. For right now your are like "twins" in my head but I'll get you straight soon enough.
Susan
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IllinoisLady-Welcome, this thread is filled with a great bunch of women. We're at all different phases of treatment and beyond,tell us a bit about yourself. I'm just over 4 & 1/2 yrs post diagnosis & doing
well.
Wendy-
you posted some graphics!! That should make Rita happy.....Susan- Hope your cold gets better soon.
Just got back from shopping and lunch. The roads were pretty bad, very slick. Didn't see one snowplow until we turned down our street.
Mary
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Hi Illinois ladies!
Next time you get together I want to go.
I am back in the states and have an appointment Tuesday at Northwestern. Spent a day this week just getting my records and diriving downtown to the new Prentiss Hospital (first time I think I have driven downtown by myself). I had a pedicure today so no doctor will see really ugly feet next week. (Vanity, thy name is woman).I will be glad to get final diagnosis about my funky, funky, boob. Probably will want more tests.
Anyway, drive carefully all of you out there.
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Good afternoon to all of you on this blustery afternoon. We did not get your snow. Instead we have freezing rain and lots of ice! Even the outside cat who resides at our house is having trouble navigating! It's treacherous so I think we're inside for the rest of the day. I wish I had one of those books that you mentioned, Susan. Today would be the perfect day to crawl up with a good book. I am going to check them out. They sound pretty good. Thanks for the recommendations. I'll reciprocate when I find one worth sharing.
Motheroffourboys: So good to have you back in Illinois. I'd been wondering what you'd decided to do. Please keep us updated on your appointments and the info that you obtain.
Hey Kats...You are right. I am so glad that Wendy figured out how to post graphics. One can NEVER have too many of them in a thread. The only thing that would make me happier is if I could figure out how to post graphics and pictures. I think I'm hopeless when it comes to technology........and yes, Wendy, I was laughing at your early attempts because I completely understand the frustration!!!! LOL
Illinois lady...welcome to our thread. Please post often. There's always room for anyone here. I don't know how old you are but I was diagnosed at age 59. My poor mother was diagnosed at 80. She passed away this past February, but it wasn't from bc.....so I'm not sure that this darn disease discriminates by age! Please tell us a little more about yourself, your diagnosis, and where you are in your treatment plan. I've found that all the ladies on this thread are fantastic and can help you through this journey.
Blackjack and Kater... I hope you made it home safely if you ventured out in this to get to the seminar. Michele and JanClare....wise decision, ladies!!!
Connie...sure hope that you and your family arrived in the Dells before all this hit.
Hi Laura and Smerf..........hope you're cuddled up inside today.
I think I'm going to make a big pot of soup.
Stay warm and travel safely if you venture out.
Rita
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It's official.......this is a loverly place to be. You are all so nice and since ( hope I don't bore you ) a couple of you have asked to know more--please get ready for my life story. Born ( we don't know if my mom was lucky or it was me ) Friday, September 13, 1945. I was 62 quite recently and in fact this month got my first old age pension check. All laugh at me when I say that but people called it that when I was growing up as a kid.
Lived in a little coal mining town ( 200 people ) and school was almost a one room--actually two big rooms and one small one. Ideal if there ever was such a thing---and all the old time cliches fit here.. we left the mayo jar out, took baths in round galvanized tubs after each other, drank water pumped from a well and drank out of a community dipper in the kitchen from a galvanized water bucket. Then polite society infiltrated and we started using real bath rooms, clorinated water, putting everything in the fridge. No wonder I have somethig now, huh !!!! I am married now for a total of 42 years with two grown children and five grandchildren--3 girls, two boys. My son's name is Jeff and he is 37. Daughter Kate is 35. I am the only one still alive in my immediate family. Dad passed on of Parkinson's in 1996. My mother had emphysema and left us at the age of 78 in 1998. She had been running 10-k races a few years before she got sick and winning them. I'm proud she was my mother. I had a sister 15 months older than me who passed away at the age of 54 from diabetes complications----11 days after my mother died. I have had several run-ins with bad medical problems. Bad thyroid nearly did me in back in late 80's. Was hyper for 7 years til they found I was losing kidney function completely from the disease. Then, when we moved back here from California to be with Mom I had a stroke. DH got me to the hospital in time to have TPA which stops the stroke, but it was still a long road to recovery. I had about decided I wouldn't have to have any more hard knocks like that---what did I think I would gracefully grow old and shuffle off when my time came quietly and happily. Well, maybe the 3rd. time is or will be the charm. No one in my family had or has bc. I'm the first and I'm sure they won't be applauding that. I love to try new recipes ( mainly ones that others have made ) but don't always like to cook. I have a huge collection of cook books, and usually keep one with me all the time for waiting places. I think that habit will come in handy on chemo days. No port for me. Don't think I'm having enough to go that route. As well, all my treatment will take place in Marion, Illlinois at the Veteran's Administration hospital. They farmed me out for my surgery to Carbondale Memorial Hospital ( very nice ) and my surgeon, Dr. Marsha Ryan of the Women's Breast Center in Carbondale was excellent. She not only is a physician/surgeon, she also teaches at SIU. As well, after her medical license she went on to get a license to practise law and teaches medical ethics too. She has a husband and family as well. I think she is incredible and I feel fortunate that on my draw that day I got her. I think I may have mentioned that right before I got my LUMP we had lost our medical Insurance so all my care is being provided by the V.A. I spent a couple years in the army in the early 60's after graduation from high school and it now appears very fortunate for me that I did so.
I look forward to getting to know and recognise all of you and hope I can keep up as winter and chemo are beginning almost together. I hope it won't sound wrong, but I am so happy to know that there are so many since you sometimes feel a bit lonely with your disease and knowing that you are just a keystroke away sure will make a difference. I have blabbed enough for now I think and need to move over and let someone else in here.
Talk to you later.
IllinoisLady
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Hi Jan and Michele, Just wanted to let you know that I did go to the seminar and it was the best thing I ever did!! The speaker was amazing and I wish I would have know before how to diffuse my frustration and anger. It took me 2 hrs to get back home tonoc, but during that time I did so much soul searching I am feeling so much better about myself and this bc journy that I am feeling normal again..on that note I want to thank you for the suggestion. I truley believe that people come into our lives for a reason..I was meant to be there today even if the weather was sooo bad. Again thank you, sorry I didn't get to meet you. Blackjack
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I am sooo sorry that I missed the seminar. It would have done me good too. I may go buy the book.
I'm so glad that it was helpful to you.
Kater - let us know what you thought about it.
Michele
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Michele, me too! I wish I had gone. Can you give us any suggestions, Blackjack?
Mother of Four - I think you had mentioned you were in Palestine, right? If so, let's hope that peace-making summit works! I live in Northbrook and my mom is in a nursing home in Wheaton, so our paths will cross. Do stay in touch on what you learn regarding your dx. I wish you well.
Illinois Lady, you have a great life history. I am sure all will work out for you and I am glad you have found this thread. It is very, very scary and your are right. It is nice to be within typing distance of others who understand your fears.
Susan
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Hi Girls, I found the seminar for me to be extremely helpful since I was not doing any of the things she talked about. Beverly Kirkhart, the guest speaker wrote the book " Chicken Soup for the soul." She talked about her journey with bc and how she dealt with it. Daily Journaling was a big part of her healing process..It helps to heal the mind and spirit by forcing you to deal with your inner emotions by putting them on paper. She also stated we need to look at life in a positive way, that we are full of life and not half full. We need to look at the positive things in ourselves and write them on paper and post them everywhere to see on a daily basis. Journaling is a safe place to record your feeling and helps solve problems and to find joy and passion within ourselves. She also talked about asking for help when needed and giving hugs was her way of giving back to others.
As bc surviors we all have dignity and courage.. most of all we have an indomitable spirit that is within all of us that helps us to keep moving forward with the bc journey.
As for me,I am so grateful to have found this wonderful site. To know that I am not alone on this journey. That there are so many wonderful women out there who have tremdeous spirit and words of encouragment to share. Thank you Illinios ladies for welcoming me to your site. If I had not read your blogs I would probably still be frustrated and depressed. God bless all of you and all women with bc
Blackjack
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Hi ladies,
It has been an icy day here. My sister Susie from St. Louis is visiting with her husband. We were to go shopping while the men went deer hunting. They went deer hunting but she and I elected to stay home after raising the garage door and seeing the skating rink that used to be a driveway. It was a relaxing day, sitting in front of the fire. Susie was my chief support person in 1994 when I was going through what a lot of you are going through now. I was telling her about meeting some of you Monday evening and how I was feeling guilty because I feel so healthy now and that my ordeal is behind me while most of you are still experiencing it. She reminded me that I had the same fears and anxieties that you are experiencing now, I've just put them in a different perspective since I'm at 13 years of recovery. I was correct when I said Monday night that there were things at the time that she and my doctor didn't think I needed to know, like the size of the tumor, the margins that weren't clear, the big probability of recurrence.. It seems now, after seeing how you girls know many more details than I did, that I was living in a bubble. But for me at the time, it worked. I just trusted that they were doing what was best for me. And, thanks to chemo, I've forgotten a lot of what I DID know.
Have a nice Sunday, everyone. It is supposed to be warmer than today and NO ice!
Mary Jane
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Welcome to the newcomers, we are glad you found us.
Forum:
I remember hours of reading before my surgery and how much that helped, since the doctors and nurses tell you about the least amount possible. But as Mary Jane might have indicated, sometimes ignorance might be bliss?
(Look at your cat or dog....don't they seem happy not knowing to worry about death? or anything? next vet apptmt?...I try to be more like them.
My newest stray has a bad cold and I hope I can get him to vet Monday, he might have feline leukemia so it may be fatal and I can't let him get near my cats)...so it's not all roses, the poor pets!
That's how my Mom faces her ovca...we are still waiting to know when chemo will start. We are managing to have some laughs, but stress is on the high right now the rest of the time.
(Does anyone know about ghosts, there seems to be voices and strange things happening to the tenants of my grandma's house where my Mom grew up). There were no murders there, two deaths, but my uncle had high stress from a relative before he died (at hospital from infection during chemo)...the encyclopedia says ghosts come back for revenge? I'm interested in staying over there some night if it works out with the tenants! Maybe he's trying to tell us something? They say lights flicker, ceiling fan goes on, lately watching tv lines went through it like a magnet passed in front of tv, and they said the microwave was NOT on.
Smerf: I'm sorry, I did not know you were going to seminar today, I got books for Jan and Michele, I have not looked at it. The speaker, Beverly, was co author of the chicken soup book but she was THE author of the book they gave away sponsored by Roche Laboratories, "My Healing Companion". She said that you would get everything from her speech in the book. Beverly Katherine Kirkhart.
It might interest you to know she said she had it all before BC.
She had house of her dreams, a bed and breakfast that she loved to work at each day, a great husband....then after 17 years she got divorced, 1991, bankruptcy, etc.? and in 1993 she was dx'd with BC.
She came all the way from CA, what weather to have for her arrival!
She also mentioned she was with another woman and Dr. Susan Love starting some resource center in Santa Barbara, that was impressive!
Blackjack summarized the speech well. I got there early because of the roads and tried to figure out who Black jack was...I told the ladies Michele and Jan were not coming, but I didnt notice any other names I knew. I asked them to tell "Black jack" that I was there, but apparently they didnt figure it out.
By the time the speech started I was having headache and nausea and was sick up until an hour or two ago...so even if I would have figured out who Blackjack was, I wouldnt have been much fun. I really wanted to just sleep in the back.
It took 2 hours to get home with one quick stop at grocery store, and a road was blocked on way home so I suppose there was a debilitating accident somewhere along the line. When I got to my own lane, it's pure ice and I have my Mom's van stuck in the icy grass and other vehicles here have dead batteries so I dont think I'll get my niece to church in the morning! I might get to sleep in, yeah!
I'll look at my notes and comment further when feeling better I hope.
Kater
She said we are cancer survivors since the first day of our DX.
Oh something really made sense today. With "cognitive impairment" from the treatment and meds...who isn't thinking of all the things to be done, like the cables behind your pc?..The speaker today suggested how much healthier it is to get it off your mind and onto paper. What timing, I just bought a Covey planner from sams club for about $40 the other day...knowing I need to get back to getting things in order. I had goals thanks to the Covey seminar, when all this bad stuff happened....so getting BC was just a wake up call to hurry up the plan...hopefully. We'll see what happens.!
I think emailing your close friends and even posting here is a form of journaling and can do nothing but good for us.
Well i'm on page 51 already! interesting journal writing book, better send this before my net service goes down again! (ice)
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Kater:
You are awesome. Thanks for your insights and for caring about us.
Susan
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Kirkhart: page 161
According to a study at Loma Linda Univ, after 30 minutes of laughter the med students' disease figthing white blood cells increased by 25%
She also cited a study that said support groups might extend your life, but recently a study negated that, I believe, according to a TV spot.
I say quality vs anything else, I'm happier having a support group! So that must mean it's a good thing!
I see bolds aren't coming out now ..... on these comments. 8-(
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I'm still reading THE journal book!
p.s. ....Does anyone know how to get 2008 pages to all fit in the planner from sams club?!!!!!!
What am I missing?
I used to have a planner and all the pages fit!
Hey, bold is back!
Oh and ...hmmmm our last meeting Laura to go..
tickled our funny bone with her speech on how to fight a radar speeding ticket (eat your heart's out, those of you who missed the speech-YOU REALLY MISSED OUT)..... we should make a point to tell funny stories or read readers digest or something at all our meetings...
Kater
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BALD IS BEAUTIFUL...more trivial stuff.
Okay, i'm still reading. She says it's control, shaving your head. p. 177
I was much happier going lightly red from brown, to blonde, the few weeks before my chemo...
THEN....I went for a long walk in the country and brushed my hair over and over...it got very thin somehow, I dont even recall when it was all gone...but it was actually very fun having the short tufts of blonde sunshine sticking out by my ears and neckline through maybe half of the chemo...
Just my two cents!
did anyone else find a hump on their bald head? I tried to tell friends that it was intense intellectuality, but....hmmmmmm we all know what bunk that is! I DO mention it when I solve something at my mom's house, though, I point to the bump on my head.....trying to think the last time....I got a piece of plastic in my sandwich and we were trying to figure out if it was the bun, the turkey barbecue or the dilly beans made by the Amish. Luckily I didn't write to anyone too fast, because I went and looked at the food grinder and sure enough, the piece fit a broken spot on the bottom of the container. My uncle's caregiver said HOW DID YOU KNOW?... I pointed to my humped head. 8-)
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p. 195
Wake up call (my favorite line)
"Are you living your life to its fullest potential" (at least when you get over fatigue and nausea)....?
"Are you using your God-Given gifts?"
She said: .."I thought if only i could work on projects or products that helped people, this would be satifsying. To my surprise, it wasnt . AFter i was diagnosed, I realized my passion is to encourage, inspire and motivate people to find what they love to do and do it."
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p. 204
Create your ideal life picture
........how would my home look in an ideal setting?
..... Action to remove obstacles
List 3 columns:
"Future desire" list/ideal life.................Potential obstacles ......... Action steps.
www.BeverlyKirkhart.com
comebackpress@cox.net
1 866 431 0918
2006 revision
www.ToPressandBeyond.com publisher
isbn 0-9710425-0-0
My Healing Companion
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My Healing CompanionYOU CAN get it at her website, from amazon, or used from amazon...onewe got today said rocheon back, 2006, some used ones are 2001 at amazon0
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Hey girls...road are soooooo bad! Hope you are all home and safe and dry!
Illinoisgirl and Blackjack...just have started to read thru your posts...wow...you guys are admirable with what you have been thru...so glad you are here and are sharing.
And for those who have asked re: my sobbing uncontrollably under my kitchen table....Rita...you will get this...
My Mom and I used to play "fort" under the kitchen table when I was little. And then I didn't need to play anymore. And then she died. And then I got BC. And then I sat under my kitchen table, sobbing, wanting my Mommy. And she didn't come.
And then I found you guys.
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