Stop Smoking Support Thread
Comments
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Wow, Jan half hour surgery, sound so easy, but I am sure it never really is easy,but glad you are feeling good and can eat. How long before you are able to not "baby" the twins ?
How long in the recliner ?? I slept in one (for 3 weeks) years ago when I broke my pelvic bone, because I could not get out of bed by myself, and actually it was a very comfy place to sleep but I had the back way down, and it sounds like you cannot not do that. It's hard on the neck when you try to sit up while you sleep.
VJ thanks for your long post answering me, I am (sigh) a 50+ year smoker, started in 1955, have quit several times, sometimes only for weeks, once for 1 year, this last time for 3 months and still not smoking, but finding it hard to leave the lozenges completely alone. It has been cold turkey quits and quits with diff. types of aids, patches, gum, inhaler, hypnosis, (I did that 2 times). However this is the first time I pledged to myself that I am quitting, all the other times it was because of other peoples wishes for me to quit, and don't get me wrong, I appreciated they cared about me and therefore wanted me to quit, or a doctor told me to quit, once quit as I was reading a story in Readers Digest about how bad smoking is for us, but I would have many slips along the way and eventually was back to smoking a pack a day every time.
I guess for now I will be dependent on the lozenges for a bit longer than recommended on the box, most of the time just the deep breathing make my antsy and/or brain dead feeling go away, some times a hard candy works, and then some times only a nicotine lozenge will do for me to be able to think about what I needed to be doing. I asked my husband what he thought of my behavior for the past 3 months, and he said seems like you are hard at work making as many mistakes as you can so you have something to complain about, lol. I must admit Murphy's Law has been around us alot these past 3 months.
Well, I am still determined to not go buy any smokes, he still does smoke his cigars, but only in the livingroom now, never in the car or anywhere else, and I never have had an urge to try his cigars. I really appreciate his not smoking in the car as that seemed to be one place we always both smoked alot, and cigar smoke is quite heavy in a small space.
dsgirl
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Oh Jan,
Glad to hear that all went well and that you are home and recuperating! Hope that you get some rest and heal up quickly....
Thinking of you!!
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Sweet,
I have pain in my right hip as well as my right shoulder. It has been that way since before my diagnosis. I mentioned it to my onc and he basically said he wasn't worried about it and I had just had a clean bone scan... He said.. that the pain was a bit of osteoarthritis due to... um, er... being a certain age! I wanted to hit him but I realise that was good news!
I'm sure for me the Tamoxifen has aggravated it and, in your case, I'm sure chemo has done a number on you as well!!
Sending peaceful thoughts your way! As you sit in the "waiting room" know that I am there with you, in spirit, holding your hand!!!
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Yay Jan!!! Yippy quishey Twins!!!! Happy to hear you are feeling so good!
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Oh boy, well here goes:
I am scheduled for a consultation with the plastic surgeon on Tuesday, 3/15. My b/s, who had contact with the plastic surgeon today, called to tell me I would need to quit smoking 2 months prior to the DIEP procedure and for about the same or a little longer after. She said she wanted me to quit "ASAP....like....today". I felt like I couldn't breathe on the phone. I have never quit, I've smoked for about 30 years and even the mere thought gives me tightness in my chest. I know we're supposed to quit because we WANT to quit, but I NEED to quit in order to have this procedure. I haven't even had a chance to speak with my physician about smoking aids and due to my extreme panic disorder I fear he won't give me the Chantix. From what I understand, I can't even use NRT because you can't have nicotine in your system either for this surgery. Although I'm not positive about that. I am feeling so overwhelmed and terrified right now. I am hoping, as I head outside right now for a few puffs off a cigarette, that I can find the inner strength to get through this!
I am also contemplating taking a leave from work. I want to spend some time using the workbook, getting some exercise in and being in an environment that is as stress-free as possible. (While I was at work this week pretending I quit and trying not to smoke for "2 hours", it made my so incredibly anxious and I had a tightness in my chest I can't describe.) Maybe it's not a good idea to be home but I figure this way I would have more freedom to try and control cravings. I could get on the treadmill if necessary, lie on the couch and try relaxation if necessary, take a nap or other things I wouldn't be able to get away with at work.
I am sorry for the rambling - I am just so nervous! Combination of the BRCA2 diagnosis and the need to quit smoking.
Thank you all for listening!!!
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Lisa65inNY,
OK... First thing... The THOUGHT of quitting is far more terrifying than QUITTING itself! Believe me...I was beyond terrified when I quit.. That first night when I woke up several times during the night knowing that, for the first time in over 30 years, there was not one cigarette in the house, I thought I was going to just about die! The unknown is always scarey! But here I am.. still standing! Second thing... You are looking at a prophylactic surgery so you have a bit more time on your side!
When I quit, I went cold turkey! I had never tried before and had smoked for over 30 years! I will say the first week was really hard and I was glad that I did not have a job I had to go to. That way all I had to deal with was quitting. After that, things got better quickly... Getting a plan together, in advance, using VJ's workbook or whatever plan you choose is REALLY critical to your success!!
I'm not sure what the time frame is for your surgery but, if it's out there a bit... maybe you could use some of the nicotine replacements for a couple of weeks before quitting all together.
I think you are correct in that, with DIEP, you do need to be, not only smoke free, but nicotine free as well. That requirement is not there as a punishment but as something that will help you to have the best result possible!
What has worked for some is to look at quitting just for the time that you HAVE to.... Takes away the "forever" aspect... So it becomes I will quit for 8 weeks before my surgery and 8 weeks after and then, this quitting thing is up for re-negotiation.
When you meet with your doctors ask them what they recommend.. I know when I smoked I always felt as though I was being judged but, I have found since that, most of the people in the medical community really ARE pulling for you and will not hesitate to help you in any effort to quit smoking! I think WE are are own worst critics!!
I wish the best for you and hope you will post when/if you need to!!!
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Great post Seaside. Lisa, don't think of it as a forever thing, that'll just make it too large to wrap your brain around. You are right in saying excersize helps stop the craving, also drink plenty of water to flush your system. I use the nicotene cigarette that steps you down, I found in the beginning I held it in my hand alot. I stopped doing that by cutting a straw to the size of a cigarette, then tapered down on that. I did everything I could do help step it down. I designated the computer room as a non-smoking area, even the e cig was not to be used in that room, I spent a lot of time in that room on the computer. I went back pages on this site to read what worked for others, what words really struck a cord in me, then writing that saying on a cheat sheet so I could pull it out for when a craving hit. We will all be around to help you, be sure to post when you need to. Karen
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Lisa, I agree with Seaside. I too was paniced at the thought of quitting and each time I tried it was the same thing, I would hurry up an finish all my cigarettes the night before, and wake up thinking I gotta go make coffee and have a cigarette, then thought, Oh CRAP, I don't HAVE any cigarettes. There were a couple of times I just gave in and ran to the store first thing in the morning, which just made me mad at myself. This time, I quit because I was tired of smelling bad, and also because my boyfriends sister is fighting lung cancer, and I just KNOW it's just a matter of time for me. Im beating breast cancer, I dont want to have to fight lung cancer too. So I slapped a patch on and have been smoke free for over 3 weeks now. Im still here, I didnt flip out and kill my boyfriend (Yet) LOL.
It can be done, and yes, the anxiety of thinking about quitting is worse than actually doing it. My Dr said he would rather me wear the patch then to be smoking.
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Thank you SeasideMemories, Karen333 and Sweetaerobabe!
I know that I'm going to have to do the first attempt with a NRT, even though for the procedure you can't have nicotine in your system either, but at least initially I know I will need something to help. My S/O is not a smoker and has never smoked in his life (God bless him) and he has no idea what it's like. He thinks, for example, if you were in the hospital for a week and didn't smoke that you are done smoking. Understandably he doesn't quite grasp the intense addiction and intense cravings. I worry about quitting, having a setback, and having to deal with his rantings. But right now I have to focus on me.
The nicotine addiction is telling me that I don't really need this procedure, that I can always have a PBM w/o reconstruction, that maybe I just won't get the cancer at all, etc. When in reality, the risks for me are SO HIGH, I was my sister's primary care giver during her short treatment under hospice and I definitely do not want to suffer like she did. I know I should be looking at this as a gift from the powers that be - to receive this information and take action so I don't have to go through what my sister did, but as you know the addiction is so strong that you almost can't think clearly.
This morning I was sitting on the couch thinking, "If someone told me there was 100 million dollars waiting for me if I didn't have one cigarette today" the day would come to a close and I would still be poor! Somehow, someway, I need to shift my mindset!
I do have the workbook, I printed it this morning. I am praying that this will help me and I am praying that something (either the patch, nicotine inhaler, etc.) will help. I tried the gum once, but it didn't really help me - it actually made me depressed. And due to my severe anxiety I don't know if my MD will give me Chantix but I am praying and hoping for the best!
Thanks again for your support and encouragement!!
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Lisa, Im doing the patch with great success. My Dr advised against chantex because of the side effects.
My boyfriend is also a non smoker, and doesnt understand why I can't just put it out of my mind.
So frustrating. If you have medicaid, I have found that they will pay for the patch.
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That gives me great hope, sweetaerobabe! I am hoping the patch will help me too. I take klonopin for anxiety so I don't know if I can take Chantix. I do know a lot of people who have had great success with the patch and maybe I'll need to start that way and switch to something later. If I have the DIEP surgery, I'll have to be nicotine free.
Yeah...it's really frustrating when people who have never smoked tell you how to do it! I know he means well but it's always the same, "why can't you just do it?" Or he'll say, "you should watch all those commercials on TV that tell you how bad it is for you." Umm....really? I had no idea! I love him but....
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My friend tried the patch and quit successfully, she did remove it at night to avoid what they call vivid dreams. My friend said they were really bizarre, but removing the patch at night stopped them. I don't think some people understand the physical addiction part, that's why they say "just quit", the patch will take care of the physical addiction while you are working your own quit program to retrain old habits. Keep thinking of the ultimate gaol, you get the recon. you want. Karen
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Lisa: Talk to your doctor. I used the patch. I quit the patch a week (I think) before surgery. It takes about a week for the nicotine to get out of your system. So you can use the patch, and not have to stop it for as long a period of time before hand. But ask the doc, I can't remember the exact number of days. Hang in there, I feel for you. But you can do it!
Seaside: I don't know if you meant to or not, but the babies you put up for Jan, their little blankets or whatever they are on the bottom looks like a pair of boobs to me
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Bama,
I did search for something that I thought would work! When I came to that particular image it did kind of remind me of the "occasion" that we are celebrating with a bit of a "twins" sort of spin!
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Good morning everyone!
I need to read back to catch up on this thread so forgive me if I don't address all that has been going on here.
Lisa: Relax and listen to the advice you get here. I didn't use any aids but that's just me. Many have here and they know how to use them. Also VJ's book will be a big help. Just take one day at a time and you can do this.
Jan
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Hi Everyone,
Sorry I have been MIA. I had surgery on Monday and haven't been on line much and when I am on line, my husband is near me so I can't come to this forum. He didn't know I started smoking again 2 years ago so he doesn't know I needed to quit again. Also, had to change my screen name, turns out my sister in law came to this forum and searched my screen name "basia" and read some of my posts, which I am very mad about! But thats another story and another rant.
So its been 5 weeks for me yay! and there are still points thru out the day where I want one, but its easier to distract myself and the craving passes.
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Twinmom: Dang that sis-in-law! Hope all went well with your surgery and glad you are back.0
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Hi all, yesterday was a day of cravings, I went to bed at 9 to escape them. I think I put 10 miles on the bike. Today seems better, yesterday I kept telling myself I didn't want to admit failure here. I think I teased out the reason, Sunday was the day I talked to my much missed godmother. We would talk for at least an hour, both of us smoking. You could hear each other inhaling. VJ you mentioned once that when you re experience an event strongly associated with smoking the craving is very strong, you are so right! Have to have a handy tool for next Sunday. Any suggestions? Karen
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Lisa65inNY,
NO... NO.... The worst thing you can do is watch those stupid quit smoking commercials! They always made me so tense that, even if I wasn't thinking about lighting up before they came on, I just as hell was after!!
My husband has never smoked either. They don't have to 'get it' BUT they DO need to give you all of the support they can!!
I have had issues with anxiety my entire adult life. Always thought I was just a tense type of person. Interestingly enough, I feel MUCH more relaxed and calm since I quit... If you ask my family, I am sure they would agree!!
The patch seems to have really made a difference for many of the ladies here. No shame in taking a little pharmeceutical help when you need it!
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Ramblings:
Nicotine actually leaves the body very fast, the half-life is 2 to 4 hours, which means that within 2 hours, half of the nicotine is out of your system--and completely gone with a few days. So ask your MD about NRT (nicotine replacement therapy) as a means to quit with the goal of quitting the NRT, a week before surgery. The reason they want to you quit smoking before surgery is the damage from the smoke. Nicotine does constrict blood vessels but it is all the other chemicals in the smoke that cause poor wound healing, increased risk of pneumonia and poorer surgerical outcomes due to the damage to the blood vessels.
Two things motivate us in life--carrots and sticks (working towards what we want and moving away from what we don't want.) Many health care professionals think the way to motivate smokers is to hit them with the biggest stick they can find (don't you know that smoking causes.....). that approach does NOT work--instead we work harder for the things we really want---to be smoke free because....... The big stick approach only works for non-smokers to not start but with smokers it actually pushes more towards smoking---looking at what you do want--smoking relieves my stress, relaxes me etc... successful motivation is coming up with a long term benefit of why you want to be smoke free, more than you want to avoid the short term benefit of smoking one cigarette. There is no real benefit to NOT smoke one cigarette but there are plenty of benefits of smoking it---relieves withdrawals immediately, relaxes, gives me a big jolt of dopamine. Instead of focusing on what you're giving up, focus on what you are gaining, ---better health, more money etc..
Anxiety and smoking--many smokers don't realize that smoking and nicotine interfere with the absorption of many drugs and medications---especially caffeine---once you quit smoking, cut your caffeine use in half, otherwise it like doubling up your dosage of caffeine, which can cause even more anxiety, jitters etc... from a caffeine overdose. yet many quitters will blame this as a side effect on their meds instead getting too much caffeine. Nicotine cuts the absorption of caffeine by 56%.
Just my 2 cents for today, have a joyous day, VJ
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Twinmom06,
I wasn't signed in when I first read your post. Couldn't see your picture so wasn't sure who you were at first!!
Glad to hear that you have 5 WEEKS. You are doing so well!!
I may be in somewhat the same predicament in that I think my son saw my screen name. Once someone knows that, it is very easy to google and find your posts!
Hope you are healing up well!! Was your surgery last Monday and for an exchange?
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I worked with a new person last week and he said he had googled me--so I did it and I was surprised that some of my posts showed up--must be because I use my real name instead of just a screen name.
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((((( karen333 )))))))))))
There are going to be some rough patches both with quitting smoking and grieving! I used to do the same thing... Turn in early if it was getting dicey because I didn't crave a cigarette when I was sleeping and also being tired can be a REALLY big trigger.
You sound more and more like a non-smoker each day rather than someone who just quit smoking! GREAT job identifying what the root cause of those cravings was and taking steps now to figure out what you will do when that situation happens again!
Those Sundays no doubt are going to be very difficult for you for awhile. Maybe during the hour that you would have talked to your godmother, you could write in your journal. Tell her everything that you would have on the phone. I KNOW it really isn't the same but, it may help. I will try to think of other suggestions.
Thinking of you!
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Karen333---suggestions for Sundays when you spoke to your Godmother---a couple things to think about--this is both habit and an emotional connection. habit--speaking on the phone--only talk on the phone in a room where you normally don't smoke such as the bedroom, doodle, have something to keep your hands busy. But I think a bigger connection is the emotional connection you felt while talking to your Godmother--you experienced happiness, contentment, connection to someone important--and smoking became associated with these good feelings. So when you think of your Godmother by missing her--you're missing the emotional attachment and the good feelings, which will trigger your brain to think of smoking. So the trick is to have those happy memories, without it triggering the need to smoke----that is going to be something very personal to you. suggestions: you mentioned she smoked too--did she have any complications from smoking? did you ever have a conversation with her about smoking? Or turn it around--I'm staying quit in her memory--it would be something she would want. I lost her too soon form smoking, I don't want my (children, grandchildren, godchildren etc) to have to experience the same loss if I continue to smoke.
So with the way to deal with habit cigarettes is to change behavior, but when dealing with emotional connections--it's changing the way you think. I hope this helps.
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Jan508,
How are you doing? Hope you are healing up and feeling good!
Sweet,
Any word on that MRI?
Bama,
FABULOUS picture, sista!!!
All,
Today was kind of a bummer of an appointment day. Had to get a new GYN as my previous one had retired and the last couple PAPS I've just had done by the NP at the Breast Center that I go to.
Appointment was today. I was sooooo nervous. They did a urine test and there apparently is blood (not visible but detectable) in my urine. Lots of common things that can cause this but of course they mention that rarely it can be due to bladder/kidney cancer since I was a smoker. The nurse tells me this and then takes my blood pressure. Any bets on if THAT was normal? Urine was sent to the lab for further testing. Will know those results Friday. Depending on what it shows I may get referred to a urologist!
Doctor seems nice enough. Did the exam and PAP. He wants a transvaginal ultrasound, because of being on Tamoxifen and a bone density test. I think I am just feeling down but, I am getting so tired of all of these doctors appointments and tests! That coupled with what the heck is going on with the blood has me in a bit of a tailspin today.
I know tomorrow is another day but, I had so hoped I was just going to breeze through this appointment. Guess that goes to prove that "If you want to hear God laugh, just tell him your plans".
Thanks for letting me whine!
Hope you all are well!!!
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Although today is not my quit date, I wanted to experiment with a few things. I left this AM to go to town to do errands. Normally I would smoke before I left the house, before I went into the store, as soon as a I came out of the store, before the drive home, etc. I managed to make it to town w/o stopping for a smoke, in and out of DMV w/o a smoke, in and out of the grocery store w/o a smoke and surprsingly it wasn't too bad. But that might only be because somewhere in the back of my mind I knew I hadn't officially quit yet and that cigarette was just around the corner... Interestingly enough however, when I went in to Walgreens to purchase both the patch and the nicorette gum I finally lit my cigarette before I entered the store but only took a few puffs and then threw it away.
I bought the gum just to try today, and the patch to start (without the gum) after I return from my apointment with the plastic surgeon - just didn't want to start something like that until I am closer to home in case there are undesirable side effects. I bought the 4gm gum and immediately put it in my mouth for the drive home. I have to say that although I did not have an overwhelming urge to smoke, it did make me a bit dizzy and tired. I could only tolerate it hanging out on the side of my jaw for about 30 minutes then had to throw it away. About an hour or so later I tried another piece but it did the same thing - yeah, it took that immediate urge to smoke away but I felt like I just wanted to go to sleep. I am hoping (and praying!!!!) that the patch has a better outcome. Either that or maybe I need to use the 2mg instead of the 4mg. So naturally after this was out of my system (an hour or two later) I went and had a few puffs off my cigarette...
I have heard a lot of success stories from people who have used the patch and am scared, but looking forward to giving it a try later this week myself.
As always, thanks for your kind words and support!!
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Seaside, in the midst of a tailspin you found time to respond to me, in a loving, caring way. You are some kind of lady!! Great thing to tell you when taking your blood pressure, do they not know we can assume cancer without having a reminder. Any difference in tests or strange feeling in our body, can just up the cancer flag in our minds. Don't need reminders to up the blood pressure, too bad we can't give those extra points to someone with low blood pressure. I always used to have low blood pressure, now with the fun of going to all our cancer doctors, I think the only time to get a reliable blood pressure from me is if they took it while I was sleeping!! Sending caring thoughts to a fine, fine lady, may tomorrow be the new normal. Hugs - Karen p.s. I think I am going to write notes to her on the computer, it is a no smoking room, not even e ciig allowed and I can reread them. I lost 5 lbs. since getting the bike - yippee
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Seaside- I am sorry to read you had a test that was iffy ? there's always something it seems, to worry about once we have had the dreaded c diagnosis, and the wait for results, even worse.
Hope time passes quickly for you until Friday's results are in. I hope and pray for the best for you.
I read the signature line of one of the ladies that posts here and it said "having a b/c diagnosis is like crossing the Mafia and getting away with it, but now and forever you will have to look over your shoulder", or something like that. Not a direct quote, just what I remember.
Hugs
dsgirl
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VJ, so many really good suggestions. We did talk of quiting smoking, she was down to 6 a day and I had started my quit time. In one of our last conversations, I could hear her inhale, and said "you're having a cigarrette aren't you?" She said " by the time the weather clears and you can come up each month, we will both be nonsmokers', so I think I can dedicate it to her memory, we are both now non-smokers. I also got an idea from Seaside, that's in the post above. Thank you both for your being here for me and being such inventive thinkers Karen
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dsgirl,
1Athena1 has that line as her signature... Truer words have never been spoken (or in this case typed)!! I have thought that exact same thing all day today. I'm sure she'll be happy to know that people noticed her quote!!
Thank you for your kind words, Karen!
I really do think journaling, writing notes and /or thoughts or even entire conversations whether on paper or on the computer would be such a lovely tribute to your godmother and a priceless documentation of your memories and your path through your grief.
And yes, either way... you are both non-smokers! I'm sure, while your heart is heavy and you wish she was here, she is looking down from heaven and saying... You go girl!!
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