Stop Smoking Support Thread
Comments
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Ladies, how good it is to read that we are all normal. VJ, thanks for all of your input both professional and personal. Yes, we are all alike and I do believe you when you say that most of us can't even have a few. I know I tried that after I had "laser" treatment to quit smoking .... waste of $300. It wasn't until my diagnosis that I quit and every now and then I think I would like a smoke but in my heart of hearts, I know that I would be right back at it. AND, I couldn't handle another diagnosis knowing that I started back up again. You are so right when you say this is an "addiction" .... too bad they don't have Al Anon for this but we have "us". LisaMarie, don't you ever think that you were the cause of people not coming back. As VJ says, some get cocky and are right back smoking ... too ashamed to admit it. But here we are all, pouring out our thoughts and crys, and we are all here for each other. MinusTwo .... 80 it will be when I have made it and I think I will have a smoke ....watch I won't even know where to buy them as so much will have changed by then. Seaside, good to hear from you .... don't be a stranger. You were one of our greatest supporters and encouraged all of us. Bosum ... day 12 - way to go .... see you haven't relapsed and are on your way ... takes a while for us to get it but listen to VJ ... wealth of knowledge. Ladies, have a great evening. See you all tomorrow!
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Bosum,
I did go back and re-read a bit of this thread. Noticed that you had mentioned that you had lost track of how many days it had been since you quit. That is a huge milestone considering that in the beginning that's all you think about! For me it happened around day 16 so you're ahead of where I was!!
And you are right, smoking and nicotine addiction is a really bizarre one. With most drugs of choice (and I really hate that term but couldn't think of a better one) you get an immediate reward when you consume it. You feel good!
Tobacco is an oddball one. If you think back to your first time (or any time you have started again after quitting) you felt like crap. Dizzy, nauseated, etc. You had to work at it snd it was only after you did it regularly that it felt good. But really the 'feel good' when you smoke at that point is just relief from the 'feel bad' when you don't. Yep... that's when you're hooked!
I was a hardcore, 30 year, pack a day (or more depending on how life was going..lol) smoker. Smoked all through treatment and quit 6 months after. Don't regret quitting at all! One of the toughest things I've ever done but an accomplishment that I am very proud of.
You are doing well! Take things one day, week, month at a time and soon you will be counting in years!
The ladies here will be a great source of support!
Edited to add... I'm pretty sure there's not one of us here that hasn't walked past a butt with some 'life left to it' at some point in their quit and hasn't had that same fleeting thought...lol Totally normal!
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Judi - by age 80 we'll probably be able to buy single cigarettes for $5.00 each but maybe there will be no where we're allowed to smoke it. LOL
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With most addictive drugs (like heroin) the first time is the best high and the user is chasing that first high but tolerance is built up and you never get a high as that first time. With nicotine, we get a nicotine overdose with that first cigarette. Do you remember your first cigarette? That dizzy feeling is a nicotine overdose. No one would continue smoking if every cigarette after that made us that ill. But we build up a tolerance to nicotine. Our bodies become an expert at regulating the amount of nicotine in our blood system. We smoke enough to prevent withdrawals but not enough to go into nicotine overdose.
I still use NRT when I go through a period of cluster headaches. I rarely get them any more but years ago I would spend 6 months each year cycling through headaches. During one of my cycles, a drug rep sent me samples of the mini-lozenge--when it first came out. I always try the different NRT's so I can tell my clients what they are like. I found out that my headaches got better with the mini-lozenge. Makes sense since nicotine constrict the blood vessels and with cluster headaches, the veins are enlarged. I told my neurologist and he suggested using the patch. So the next time, I used a 21 mg. and I got so sick, dizzy, light-headed, nauseated, way too much nicotine for my system--that was a nicotine overdose.
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I have heard that same thing from so many clients--about thinking about picking up a butt. I distinctly remember one woman--she was very wealthy--one of the "country club ladies"--you know the ones dripping in jewels. She came into group and admitted to staring at a long butt on the street for a long time. Another woman who was a FEDEX driver saw a bum near one of her deliveries and she said she thought about rolling him for his pack.
I did a group at a homeless shelter once. One of my visual aids is a large glass jar full of butts. It represents $350 worth of cigarettes. Afterwards someone asked if I could leave my jar. The homeless will collect butts and roll the leftover tobacco into a RYO. So they are able to continue smoking for just the cost of rolling papers.
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Ha Ha , that is so funny Minus .. Imagine that, I bet that one smoke will prob cost a small fortune and there really will be nowhere that u can smoke lol..Ty for all the happy thoughts ladies and I will let you know as soon as I get my results from my biopsy ... Again thanks to you all for the love and support ..
Seaside wow .. I have missed you .. glad you stopped in ...
Bosom .. yippee going strong .. hey and I never got to a year ever.. that's a great accomplishment ....
Well ya know .. I just keep trying and keep coming here ..
xoxoxxo have a great Thursday and weekend ...
Lisamarie
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Helllllooooo ladies. Today I did not smoke. Yesterday I did not smoke. I have 15 months and 11 days away from the evil tobacco product called cigarettes and yet, I still want one at least once a day. I win the battle but I know without vigilance, I will not win the war. Just one and yup, back to it. I know all too well from the many times over the years I quit.
I quit during both pregnancies...could not stand the smell...yet, I brought a pack to the hospital with me! (In those days, they had a smoking lounge..yup, in a HOSPITAL for pete's sake!!!) I dragged my IV Pole (had c-section) down to that lounge and lit up the first one in months and almost gagged. Put it out after three or four drags. Said, "I'm done with this forever." ummmm, not so fast. I wanted to lose the baby weight I had gained so I picked up a cig when I wanted to eat! Back to it! I got pregnant with my daughter right away so I quit again (was easier as I had only been smoking about 6 weeks at that point and only a few) but after she was born...you guessed it! Back to it! I did not smoke in my house with my babies there but out on our sunporch. I lived there during nap time, breathing frost (not heated in winter) or sweating!
Then in 2002, I quit again. For 7 months. Then....you guessed it! Back to it! Then in 2007, again for 8 months...and ummm, you know the rest.
This time is the longest I have ever gone. Not going back if I can help it!
You can do this Lisamarie...we all can if I can!
Love to all and good to see you Seaside!
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April - thanks for posting your quit story. It's good for everyone to see how hard this is and some of us made it - so far anyway!!!
LisaMarie - thinking about you. When do you expect to hear the test results? Fingers crossed & prayers going out.
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Good morning ladies. April, your successful quit story .... it shows how hard this is. My first attempts (yes there were many) were not as successful as yours. I would smoke the whole large pack (25 cigarettes) in one night and say I'll never have another one. Then once I woke up .... forgot about my quit. In the first of my many attempts, I lived in an apartment that had a cigarette machine ..... loved those dispensers. I would round up all my change and run down. It was my saviour. Or, on my other attempts, I would gain a few pounds then right back at it. In all reality, I found some little reason to go back because I really didn't want to quit. The longest I ever went was 1 year and that was when I was only 18 years of age .... I think then I just cut back the number I would smoke a day, exercised a lot, and didn't eat a whole lot. I really wanted to be a size 2. Now, move it 40+ years, cancer claims me and I just quit. No rhyme or reason for this but I knew I didn't want to die from smoking and I wanted the cancer treatment - no one was going to deny me treatment right away because of smoking. We all have similar stories and one of them will make it stick for you. Bosum ... a toothache is probably the worst thing one could have .... I just had one and it was extremely painful but I didn't think of smoking. My desire just comes out of the blue now .... when I just think of it, am pissed at something, of I start looking in my purse for a smoke. But you have done sooooo extremely well, that I think the little demon is starting to skate off of your shoulder .... he is saying you are not any fun any more. Who cares, eh? You go girl and continue with your success. LisaMarie, how are you doing? MinusTwo, April .... good morning. Beautiful day here .... going to an arts festival day .... long weekend here in Ontario .... yippeeeee!
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Good Morning ladies ... I don't get my results until Thursday , then GYNO says we will discuss my options .. either way the mass has to come out .. so we shall see.. can't wait to see my mom... I will post a photo for you all to see...Today I am headed to do last paper work with the attorney on my bankruptcy , then fill out my paper work for school ... class starts in October ... Had my first appointment with the social worker for my intake to see a doctor about my depression and anxiety .. only 4 more appointments then I should get my medicine and hopefully feel better . I just finished my 3rd period for the month of July.. I feel so exhausted . I guess from loosing too much blood .. eating lots of greens ... I just want it all to stop .. anyway prob too much info .. Hope everyone is well.. Thinking good thought's Bosom ... xoxoxoxo Hey Minus and Judi and VJ... hugs to everyone ..
LisaMarie
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Good afternoon ladies! LisaMarie and Bosum .... struggles do wear you down but it will get better. For everything that goes down must go up again. We are all here for you so never, never run away or feel that it is too much info. You know, we all have good days and bad days .... guess what .... had a great day yesterday but a lousy evening. Worried myself sick that my cancer had returned due to a very sorry arm/elbow where it all first started. I was in tears. But today is a better day ..... not sore so no worries. They say that it is related pain .... from the nerve endings .... I'll take it. So, you two are just like everyone else .... no better and no worse. Hugs to both of you {{{{ }}}}} ..... April, MinusTwo, VJ and everyone else .... hope you are having a good day!
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Oh I'm right in there w/the rest of you. Good days, bad days... Sick & tired of everything so I decided this morning to do NOTHING. It's 4:30pm and I'm still in my jammies reading an old Sara Paretsky book. I turned my phones off & had a morning nap and an afternoon nap. No cleaning, wash or cooking for me today. Breakfast was fresh raspberries & real cream; lunch was left over sirloin patty; dinner will be raw cauliflower, radishes, carrots, cucumber with ranch dip and fresh corn on the cob. Maybe I'll get motivated and go to my water aerobics class tonight - maybe not.
Bosum - hang in there. Judi - I'm right w/you about the worrying. Seems like that never ends once we've faced the big C does it. LisaMarie - in spite of 3 periods in a month (no wonder you're exhausted & depressed) it sounds like you're on the move forward. Are they checking your iron?
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Hi Ladies , Happy Tuesday . Minus I never did ask about my iron.. jeeze .. maybe on thursday I will ask him to do that for me . I am totally a crabby bitch that no one wants to be around ... I just want sleep sleep and more sleep.. today my Dog woke me at 3 am been up ever since and I am already exhausted . I am also working until 8pm... I pray I make it through the day ok.. and get home and sleep again.
I was talking to my BF mom who also had breast cancer .. and now she says they found something on her lung .. we were both discussing how once you get the Big C .. it seems to haunt you forever and there is always something going on... she does not smoke and has never smoked ...
I had to do a debt counceling yesterday to get some certificate for the bankruptcy lawyer .. crazy stuff... it cost 25 .. just to talk to someone who said oh yes it seems as if bankruptcy is your only option .. now what are your goals for the future ... dah dah ... Well I reply , I am going to try to repair my credit score one day at a time....
All days are not bad ... I just feel hopeless a lot .. I am hoping once I get through this process with the mental health center and get some medication that I will feel better .. even if I just take it for a bit until the stress and craziness goes away...
I wont leave Judi ... I am here as long as I am welcome ... I told you some days I don't know what I would do without you all ...
Big Hugs Bosom .... hang in there , you are still on the road to freedom ... and I cant even begin... so kepp on keeping on .... xoxoxoxox
Lisamarie
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Just thought I would play. HUGS to all! xoxoxox0 -
Oh April .... I love your post .... how do you make these faces ..... oh I see it .... let's try
very cool. Bosum, way to go on your smoking .... your getting there. I personally think when you starting counting how long you go then you are on your way. LisaMarie .... really, you are also on your way to many good things to come including not smoking. Your here and that's what counts. MinusTwo, love your menu and your lazy day .... wish I could just sit myself down and not think. BTW you are a real bad ass .... real cream .... you go girl! Well, off for some minor eye surgery ... let u know how it turns out!0 -
Oh yeah, I just want to throw something into the mix .... losing weight is as hard as quitting/not smoking. I joined weight watchers b/c the meds were making me gain weight. I was such a proud peacock .... lost 3 lbs the first week and gained two back the next week. But I feel good .... watching what goes into my big mouth ..... I not obsessed with it as I had a sausage on a bun and fries/gravy but overall feel that it's happening for me but who knows. See Bosum, one is just as hard as the other. I wasn't blessed with wearing "goody two shoes"!
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Happy Hump Day. I'm going to force myself to head to Water Aerobics. I'd much rather not go, but had no luck doing a rain dance, and since I'm the one who takes the attendance I'd feel too guilty if I didn't show.
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MinusTwo, yes you should go to water aerobics. I'm on my own for a few days and forced myself to take my 4 km walk all by myself. Much easier when you have someone to talk to. But, it clears your mind so go for it! Quiet on this board today. Hope all is well with everyone!
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Good Morning my dear friends ... well today I took my plates off my car and need to bring them to DMV and show proof to insurance that they were turned in... I am gonna miss my car but hey I still think my bankruptcy was the way to go... Now gotta look for a dependable ride that will be paid for ... no payments ...lol...
Today at 2 pm I go to the GYNO for my results and options ... I know you guys will be in my pocket giggling and snacking ... That will keep me smiling ... xoxoxo
The garden update.. my tomatoes are growing but not fast .. Its already August , I have not gotten one red one .. a bit disappointed. My cucumbers yielded one so far. something keeps eating the blooms from my zuchini and my eggplant as well as my peppers sooooo None of those .. anyway ... still hoping ...
I hope this message finds all of you in good spirits today .. again I love ya all sooo much ..
xoxoxoxo
Lisamarie
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LisaMarie - pocket party for sure. What would you prefer - salty or sweet? We'll be with you all the way!!
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LisaMarie ..... I with MinusTwo ..... we are with you!
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OK LisaMarie. It's time to break out the margaritas - 7:30pm in Houston. We'll try to stay reasonably quiet, but we're cheering for you.
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Ok ready .... Good News ... my biopsy came out okay ... yippeeee... no hysterectomy here ... I got to go for surgery just to remove the mass and then a simple D&C and ablasion of the uterine lining .. I will know more Monday when they are scheduling .. I am soooo relieved .. You ladies were awesome Doc did not even know you were there ... xoxoxoxoxo .. going to see the mental health doc today hopefully get on some correct meds for my anxiety and depression... Glad you are all here ..
xoxoxoxoxox
Lisamarie
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YES!!! High five Lisamarie!! so happy with the outcome of this!! xoxo
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WHIPEEEEEEEEE LisaMarie. Fabulous news. The margaritas MinusTwo made were awesome .... more please! What a relief you must feel ..... see I told you good things are coming your way!
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LisaMarie - Fantastic!!! We're all so pleased for you. Let us know when you're scheduled for the D&C. Maybe we should have strawberry margaritas for the next procedure. Or even mojitos if I can figure out how to make those. This is more drinking than I've done since I started treatment in March 2013.
Hope you scored some updated meds for the depression. All of us are hit by that in cycles as we deal with the results of BC.
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Thanks everyone .. Happy Sunday .. they put me on 10 mg of paxil .. one daily and Remron 15 mg one at night for sleep .. cant tell if it's working yet as I just started it and I know it takes time to get into the system ... Not much to report ... hope everyone is having a great weekend .. xoxoxoxox
Lisamarie
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LisaMarie ... glad to hear things are working out for you .... time will tell! MinusTwo ..... I love all of those drinks ..... let's party! Have a great day to all of the ladies!
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Off topic but I hope you will support this: Robin Williams Mental Health Care Act:
Laughter is the best medicine. If you believe that then I guess that is why it is so hard for us all to believe that such a comic genius like Robin Williams, who gave us all such joy and laughter, could feel such hopelessness and despair that he could take his own life.
I have heard that we all have thought of suicide at one time or another. I certainly have. I've had cancer twice and sometimes the cure is worse than the disease. I have always valued quality of life over quantity and if I was ever at a stage 4, I'm not sure what decisions I would make but chemo might not be one of those choices, but an extra dose of pain killers might be.
But if we can learn anything from the unfortunate event it is that no one is exempt from inner demons. We all have them, some just have stronger more powerful demons. Yet the safety net for those who struggle with depression and other mental illnesses has huge holes in it. Here is a man who had all the resources money could buy, yet it didn't save him. What about the ordinary John or Jane Doe. What are we to do? In the 1980's our mental health system was gutted and it has never recovered.
What I am suggesting is that we use this tragedy to help others. I hope that everyone who reads this, will write to your congressman/woman and suggest a "Robin Williams Mental Health Care Act". This will fund mental health services that are so badly needed in our country. Won't you join me today and write President Obama, your senators, your house representatives. 34,000 people commit suicide every day. We couldn't save one of our brightest actors but we can start to help others. If nothing else just copy this letter and email it:
President Obama: http://www.whitehouse.gov/contact/submit-questions-and-comments
For Congress: http://www.congressmerge.com/onlinedb/
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VJ, how true your words ring. I would write to a congressman but I'm Canadian but regardless where you are from, mental health is an issue all should take seriously. I just said the same to dh this morning that money doesn't buy you happiness. Amazing that today this issue can be resolved.
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