Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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I went to the grocery store this morning, rather than tomorrow or Saturday when it will be very crowded. I won't go on a Thursday morning again, because they weren't well stocked on many staples. In the middle of an isle my phone rang. It was a bit comical because another woman and I both reached for our phones as we have the same ring tone. I thought it was her phone, turned out to be mine. I had made an appointment to see the NP at my PCP's office on Monday via the on line appointment setter. Well, they changed systems and my appointment wasn't available in the first place. The woman on the phone wanted to reschedule, but I told her I wasn't home and would call back. I called the office when I got home and made an appointment for the 29th. Next week I will at least be FREE OF DOCTORS!!!! Woohoo!
I really wish I had stuck to my original plan of retiring at the end of last school year. Things are so messed up now due to breast cancer. I know it will work out, but there is so much aggravation. Truth is, I don't want to go back to work! I feel tired all the time and can't imagine feeling normal again. Knowing I need another surgery makes it more depressing. I know I need to wait until after I see my plastic surgeon again, to even have any idea of when I will be finished with the "fills," and have the surgery. Even if I can have surgery sometime in March, doesn't mean I will be able to schedule it then. It is so depressing to not have a clear idea of what to do moving forward. I am not good with a "wait and see" approach, but I don't think I will have any other choice.
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Mav, my DH (Bob) is a cardiologist, in private practice working two offices (one of which will close 12/31), three hospitals and 2 Union Health clinics (8-5 twice a week at one, 9-1 at the other). Money is not the problem for our vacations: time is. But since time off is patients unseen and money not coming in to defray his office costs...
I spoke too soon about the flood control project in the basement. They finished early & under budget, but the new concrete has still not cured and there is a constant narrow dribble-puddle running from that area (front of the house) all the way to the back floor drain, where our laundry system, auxiliary fridge and litter boxes are. (We confusedly refer to the former, where the flood control stuff and boiler/water heater are, as the "back of the basement" because we use it less--and the true "back," which is the part we use, is by the basement stairs & side door, the first part of the basement you see when you enter). We've been afraid to let the kitties back down there--though their boxes and their rubber under-box mats are dry, we don't want their paws touching that water in case it's contaminated with concrete chemicals or worse. The water looks clear and doesn't smell, but still... The cats are disgruntled about having to still be limited to one litterbox in the first floor bathroom.
The overflow/sump pump has been leaking since the big flood. It's under warranty (been replaced once) but now the plumbers can't get in touch with the manufacturer--who won't return their calls. If we have to redo the project and go with the original plan ($4K pricier plus electrician and periodic battery-backup replacement), there goes the budget for travel.
Meanwhile, my troublesome third toe tip callus is even more painful than ever--the salicylic acid corn remover pads are making the skin extremely sore to the point where even UGGs (much less shoes with socks) hurt. And the interaction between the second (hammer) toe and deformed big toe (bunion) is causing a painful callus to form at the second toe tip as well.
And now it's not only snowing, but finally starting to stick. Ugh.
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Such are the joys of living in a house built in 1911, with the block's sewer system built in 1908. Our neighbors up & down the block had their flood control projects connect to where those 1908 sewers are--some of whom have had to locate their pit covers (resembling manhole covers) on their "approach" or "courtesy" walks between their stoops (as we used to call 'em back in Brooklyn) and the city sidewalks.
But it turns out that it's not a real flood--it's the defective sump-pump; the mfr. finally returned the plumber's call and promises the new one should arrive "in about a week" (supply-chain issues, of course). So the plumber shut it off.
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Sandy, you are really lucky to be married to a doctor! I was hoping to have a doctor in my family, either my kids or their spouses but no. I take Quinapril HCTZ and there was a recall. My pharmacist said they never had any of the recalled lot # but I still have my doubts. My cardiologist agrees with me that now would’ve been the best time for me to switch medications anyway. Our planet is so polluted that veggies, meat, water, air etc., probably have more of a chance at causing cancer than that medicine did
I am sooo sorry to hear about your basement issues! Everything seems to be a hassle these days! It’s cliche but true, they don’t make things like they used to!
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If it can be verified, we don't need faith. . . . Faith is for that which lies on the other side of reason. Faith is what makes life bearable, with all its tragedies and ambiguities and sudden, startling joys.
Madeleine L'Engle0 -
Going to get ready for going back to Marion. Dh needs the eye Dr. to check how the meds are working to heal his eye infection. Baffled where it came from, but Dr. seemed to feel from allergies. Says you might have to move. Uh, I think not. This is our home, and we are staying put. Likely will check back in later, after we get back.
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We had a white lawn this morning, our first frost of the winter. Now the sun is out. No plans for the day except senior exercise class at 11:30.
Hope all goes well with appointments and activities others are involved with.
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illinoislady, wishing you and DH a safe trip to and from Marion! I remember a doctor asking me after I had allergy testing if I had cats, I said no, she said good, then she asked if I had dogs and at the time I had two, and she said, I shouldn't have a dog. We have been dogless for about 5 years now, due to the passing of our beloved furry family members, and I see no difference in my allergies. Yep, I wouldn't move either! Honestly, I can't believe he said that, as if it was easy to do!
Not a lot scheduled today. We are once again "hermit crab sitting" LOL, as my DD and family fly to my SIL's family for Thanksgiving! So far "Hermie" seems to be settled in. We keep him in the home office which is the warmest room in the house! I also plan to go through medical papers today and shred those with no purpose to keep.
Feeling very down about my lack of energy. I am fine in the morning, or at least better in the morning as compared to late afternoon or evening. By afternoon, evening I feel like a truck hit me! I am trying to focus on Thanksgiving and just relax about all things breast cancer, but it is very hard to do. Feeling sad about my body and really wish my original appointment with the NP had been a valid one. I hope I can still open up to her when I see her in two weeks. I have a hard time talking to anyone about my mental/emotional self. I think it all comes down to my fear of Alzheimer's or brain mets and because as a society, mental issues are seen as weakness and something to be ashamed of.
I just got my report yesterday from the stress test I had prior to surgery, and it said I have Sinus Bradycardia, which I looked up and means less than 60 beats/min. Otherwise, it was normal, but short due to the fact that I couldn't catch my breath. I noticed some of the brain symptoms I have could be related to that as I didn't mention any mental symptoms to the person running the test or to my cardiologist. I will mention the SB to the NP, but she also has access those results too as they use the same patient portal, and a letter is always sent to my PCP when I see my cardiologist. I actually believe the cause of my symptoms is sinus related and I sure hope I am right!
I really wish I could convince myself that I will feel "normal" again, but right now, it sure doesn't feel like it. You would think that having recovered from breast cancer twice before, the third time would be much easier, but it isn't. I think a big part of that is knowing I have another surgery to go through. Maybe after that surgery I can go back to focusing on general health, exercise, and really getting back to normal!
Anyone in NY affected by the huge snow fall?
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My partners brother is in Buffalo. But he’s also an author that travels a lot, so we’re not sure he’s even home. He has a flip phone, so no texts. Last night we heard 3 feet in Buffalo with outlying areas as much as 6 feet!
We hit the road tomorrow morning, West Monroe, Louisiana for Saturday night. Possible dusting here in Allen overnight. I’m so done with this weather.
We did the day at the Dallas zoo, I think our 3rd visit. The kids get to run run run. I got in 3 miles and I’d bet they doubled that.
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Sandy- Scanxiety is the ultimate in dread.
Sometime ago, can’t find it on these boards, I posted my dilemma about resuming Arimidex after three years on it and a break since June because of terrible joint pain which turned out to be the need for hip replacement September 12. MO, Dr. M , told me I should restart Arimidex, one week after surgery. That didn’t happen, Covid intervened,etc. I have been troubled mightily about going back on it. You responded, and again I can’t find it, that if it were you, at my 88 year old age, you would be more concerned about osteoporosis, quality of life, etc. than resurgence of BC. I messaged Dr. M all my concerns. This is his response:“When we first met, we discussed prognosis with and without the drug. If we knew that you would live to 98, there would be an 18% chance of suffering a breast cancer recurrence during that time without treatment. On the other hand, other things can happen along the way first, so the actual risk is probably only about 10%. A full five year treatment would cut that risk by half, to 5%. You have completed half the treatment at this point, and will have received half of the available protection.
Bottom line: Stopping now leaves you with about 7% risk for recurrence vs 5% if continuing for full 5 years - only a 2% difference. You would not actually, then, be taking much of a risk by stopping. “However, BS, Dr. W feels I should give resuming a try. Caught between the proverbial rock and hard place. Will worry if I do or don’t, but leaning toward you and Dr. M.
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We’re having seasonably cold weather, but I could do without the 15-20 mile per hour winds. It’s keeping us indoors for our exercise. I miss the fresh air. At least we’re not getting the snow accumulation like they expect in Buffalo this weekend. yikes.
Figure I’ll need to go to the grocery store twice next week - Sunday for our usual shopping day and Tuesday to pickup the fresh veggies I’m bringing for Thanksgiving at my cousins home. We switch off who hosts, but everyone brings different sides so the host only worries about the turkey. I’m handling sweet potatoes, raw veggies, pickles, and pumpkin pie.
Heading to the podiatrist this afternoon. Hopefully she can make a recommendation on my sore calluses.
Mavericksmom - understand how you feel about not feeling ‘normal’. I had exchange surgery in March and hip replacement in April. It’s take a toll on my body. I guess it’s a new normal. Some days I’m fatigued and just press on.
Stay safe.
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keywestfan - Chiming in here on your dilemma. I feel like Sandy gave you good advice, all things considered, as well as Dr M. In your shoes, I would stop it. That extra 2% seems not worth it given other issues resuming the AI would present.
Wishing you strengthening, positive thoughts as you make your decision.
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Judy, I'd go with Dr. M's advice rather than Dr. W's. While Dr. W is a fantastic surgical breast oncologist, Dr. M is not only a medical oncologist but also just about the most strict and cautious one in the N.Shore system (at least in the north 'burbs--Evanston, Skokie, Glenbrook, Highland Park). If he says the recurrence risk is less than the AI's hit to your QOL, that's definitive IMHO.
Mav., "Sinus" in "sinus bradycardia" has utterly nothing to do with your sinuses! It refers to the fact that your heart rhythm pattern is "sinus rhythm," which means "normal!" And Bob (my cardiologist DH) doesn't worry about bradycardia unless your resting heart rate is consistently 50 or lower. Mine hovers between 52 (when sleeping) and 60 (maybe 62 if I'm sufficiently caffeinated). If your exertional heart rate is on the lower side, it's a sign that you are well-conditioned. (Athletes often have trouble reaching their "target rate" as defined by their weight and age). If you're short of breath, ask your cardio what your ejection fraction is--especially if you have ankle swelling or lower-leg edema. You want to rule out heart failure--but if it's early & mild it's easily treatable with meds and diet. (Of course, if you get headaches over your eyes and a stuffy nose, see an ENT for your actual sinuses).
Jackie, safe travels to & from Marion! May the roads stay ice-free. We've been having snow flurries, but still nothing is sticking.
Scanxiety Part I (OCT & eye ultrasound) is in the rear-view mirror. My eye tumor is stable--and not only do I not need a new eyeglass Rx, my L eye has improved a bit (at least distance-wise). Scanxiety Part 2 is in progress: had a chest X-ray this a.m. to check on the size of my tiny lung nodule (likely a scar, a souvenir of the coughing jag I had from parapertussis in late 2019); followed by an abdominal MRI with contrast to rule out any liver mets (no symptoms). My melanoma MO has me on the every-8-month plan to keep tabs on it. (My ocular onc still sees & scans my eyes every 3 months; if I'm still stable at my May appointment I will go to every 6 months, and if no mets at the 5-yr. mark, then annually). I see the melanoma MO Monday morning (and might get the MRI report as soon as tonight). Then that afternoon I get my neuro-PT evaluation (postponed from yesterday due to having to be here for the plumber). Next scan after that will be my annual mammo Dec. 5.
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Thank you Celiac. I’m so uncertain it helps to have you weigh in.
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Keywestern - I stopped my AI's at 3 years and am not sorry.. I have no wish to have to suffer like my mother did with dementia for 5 years and decided to take my chance with cancer. If I get dementia, then I lose all control of my future. With cancer, not so much.
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Keywest - I answered on another thread, but I'm in agreement with Celia & Taco. It's a personal decision of course, but quality of life is more important for me.
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Sandy, how interesting, I have a lung nodule too. The Pulmonologist I had to see even did two Pet ScansIt started to shrink at one point, but then grew some again. He is very good and based on the Pet and the fact that it didn't present the right " look " he said that I likely have no worries -- and I didn't worry.
Maverick, I think I tried gently to offer ways to not find yourself in the dumps because it is all too much. I was wrong. Even though I wish with all my heart it wasn't happening, we all feel what we feel validly. Then again, you worked hard
You have worked hard twice to get Ned from cancer, and you are older now. You have a few other issues, and though they don't sound too threatening, but they are resting atop everything that has happened to you.
Sometimes in the afternoon, early evening I don't get exhaustion, but I get enough tiredness I feel forced to lay my head on the table or almost anything that is nearby. Even had to rest my head a couple of times on my bed getting into my night clothes tonight. When I get like that, I really don't have to sit down although that helps, but I just have to bend over on something and rest my head. I feel like I just can't keep standing totally up-right. I'll keep asking for your angels to help you.
Talking to a lot of women here, it seems to me that maybe none of us get off Scott free after we defeat the cancer. I thought I had but got a second cancer (new primary again), twice in a row (bladder chemo didn't get it all and the next scope showed it still there. Then the heart surgery but I had to wait overlong for the scope I was due to have about time for my surgery and when Dr. B., who I think suspected the cancer was still there could found nothing, it was a great relief -- but I'm still working on getting totally well.
I hope we all get over fears and the odd things that seem to be troublesome just as were ready to retire or close to it, and certainly when we expected to be well and it just hasn't quite kicked in yet.
I often think of you as well KeyWest.
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I forgot to put in a quote today. For all us gals who seem to get roadblocks after cancer.
If it can be verified, we don't need faith. . . . Faith is for that which lies on the other side of reason. Faith is what makes life bearable, with all its tragedies and ambiguities and sudden, startling joys.
Madeleine L'Engle0 -
Scanxiety Part II is history. MRI & chest X-ray unchanged from March, and melanoma MO (Dr.
messaged me that they "look great." The MRI report (dictated by a resident/fellow) mentioned a "T2 circumscribed lesion in partly-visualized R breast, without enhancement, probably postoperative in etiology" and that it should be followed up on my mammo in a couple of weeks--I panicked momentarily until I remembered that's what remains of the mammary seroma (surrounded by scarring). I see Dr. B for my 8-mo. checkup Monday morning, but either have to kill a massive amount of time before PT after lunch (Kellogg Cancer Center & the PT clinic are only 3 bl. apart), or drive home and then back again. Maybe I'll take the train to PT. Killing time in Evanston might involve dangerous dietary cheating...or worse, shopping in Skokie.
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Cindy, great zoo picture! When my kids were still young we made a point to visit zoos wherever we traveled. We had membership to the Philadelphia Zoo which got us in free to other zoos. We all love animals and always learned something new about them. The Dallas Zoo sounds fun!
illinoislady, thank you so much for the kind words. The day is early, but I feel less stressed this morning. I have an especially hard time dealing with things I can't control, and right now all aspects of my life are in disarray. I am trying to focus on the holidays to distract my mind. I appreciate your words more than you will ever know!
sandy, LOL, I do know the difference between Sinuses and Sinus Bradycardia. When I read you comment, I thought "why did she think I was talking about Sinus Bradycardia when I was just talking about sinuses?" Then I went back and re-read what I wrote and thought Ohhhhhh, I definitely sounded like I mixed them up! In reality, that is a perfect example of how my mind is functioning or not functioning, right now. My thoughts go all over the place, sometimes bad in conversation, but worse with written words. I am sorry for the confusion! I get ice pick headaches many times a day now, and even when the pain is in the back of my head, it often makes my nasal passages sting. That said, as far as the Sinus Bradycardia goes, I found it VERY comforting what you said about not worrying unless the numbers got under 50. I forget what mine were, but I think 58. I am not usually affected by shortness of breath other than when I walk upstairs, especially multiple flights of stairs. When all this mess in my life settles down and I retire, I am making going to the gym a high priority!
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You are now at a crossroads. This is your opportunity to make the most
important decision you will ever make. Forget your past. Who are you
now? Who have you decided you really are now? Don't think about who
you have been. Who are you now? Who have you decided to become?
Make this decision consciously. Make it carefully. Make it powerfully.
Anthony Robbins0 -
Sunny, but cold here this morning. The cold came early this yr. and seems to have a big inclination to stay. When I first came back home in '97 I dearly loved the snow (you don't get much in southern California) and I was so thrilled I would put on boots and coat and take a long walk while snow was falling gently to the ground. Now, I am not nearly as thrilled, not because it is less pretty overall, but Life handed me the dish of having chemo and finding myself horribly cold. I think some of that stayed with me and is again enhanced (thankfully not as bad) after surgery.
Do hope all of you, especially those experiencing cold weather, have as bright a sun as what is here. Cold, windy and gray is much harder to take -- the sun helps not only to warm you but have an easier time accepting weather that is VERY bothersome.
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Woke up to cold weather, but at least it's sunny. A little warmer and less windy than that last several days. Hopefully we'll be able to walk outside today. Otherwise a quiet day. Lots of football to watch.
I have an appointment with the eye surgeon in late January 2023. In the meantime, I'm dealing with blurry vision. Ugh. Wish BCO had an option where you could listen to topics.
Breakfast for dinner tonight. My favorite. I have egg whites, a sweet potato, and toast. DH gets scrambled eggs, hash browns, turkey bacon and toast. Yum!
Have a wonderful day.
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While it is sunny today, it is also bitter cold with temp at 36 but breezes that make it feel colder. Seems like winter has arrived early and to think I was sitting outside in short sleeves about 2 weeks ago. I would like that weather back because once I am cold, I can't seem to shake it off,
Working with Regan on sit and stay. She has sit mastered but "stay" is the new command and she is doing okay with it so far. Other is "paw" to get her to shake hands; she will tentatively give me her left paw with touch and then freely offers her right one. So both are still a work in progress. Need to work on keeping her from jumping up on me because her nails are murder. They have been trimmed by the vet, but since they were largely ignored for 2 years, the quick is too close to the end so they can not really trim them down further. She was permitted on furniture at her first home it seems, but my rule has always been that dogs have no place on my couch or chairs (that doesn't work well with the cats though). So if unsupervised she is likely to climb on couch or recliner. I have multiple beds in family room with 2 being for the cats but of course, they prefer the dog bed. So first come, first served is the rule here. She is too shy to chase the cats off the dog bed and the same held true with Lita. Both have curled up in the largest cat bed which is really too small for them but they make it work. She is letting DH do more and more for her though he still has the challenge of hooking her up to her leash. Once she is hooked up she's willing to go for a walk with him.
DS and grandchildren are all sick with a cough and GI issues. So they will not be hosting Thanksgiving for family. This was sort of derailed by Covid anyhow, but we were hoping to do a restart this year. So plans have changed but will celebrate with DD and DSIL who have offered to cook the meal at my house. I have a large turkey thawing in the garage refrigerator. I think we can then make platters for DS's family and drop them off. We have ordered meal for past several years from different sources and finally decide the best came from Boston Markets. So this will be the first home cooked one in 3 years. As long as I can relax rather than do all the prep and cleanup, I will actually enjoy the day for a change. I am sure I will chip in but having to orchestrate rather than do the actual work seems like a nice trade to me.
Have my annual mammo this Monday and not looking forward to it. Hope everyone has a good weekend.
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I sold only two skirts and a scarf at the crafts sale. Plenty of people wanted my business card, though. I have all the hanging stuff in my closet, the rack disassembled and also in my closet, and the box of stuff in my sewing closet. I have sewing to do for a customer and for myself, then some writing.
Taking care of odds and ends since I have been away from home for most of the day.
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22 now, going down to 12 overnight. Enough snow on the ground now to make walking tricky. Gonna stay put tonight. Maybe tomorrow as well (Bob never wants to go out during a Bears game anyway).
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Tonight we’re in West Monroe, LA. It’s 39 now, overnight down to 30. It was a gray drive all day but fortunately no rain. We ate at Cracker Barrel near the roaring fireplace.
Hard leaving grand kids, we won’t see them until some time in January and probably only for the day. The oldest turns 5 in early December, youngest will be two in January.
Snow talk- I always liked the first great snow. Things are quieter, the world looks picture perfect. Then I’m done with it. Back in the day I skied a little. Way way back ice skating on ponds, with a bonfire to warm up by was the bomb, cold be damned. It’s been 7 years since we purchased 2nd home in Florida. I stayed in NY for BC surgery & rads; stayed again for covid; and would stay again as necessary. But after hamstring avulsion surgery, my fear of slipping on anything is forefront in my mind. So for me snow can be a sweet memory.
Mary, sorry you didn’t have more sales. But it’s a good sign they took your business card. Sandy, I’m glad your medical appts all worked out well. Stay in and watch the Bears. Betrayal, Regan sounds like she’s coming around fine. Cardplayer, if you read this forum on your phone you can zoom in and make it super large. I do it when I can’t locate my readers. Jackie, they make gloves and I think socks too that are battery operated that heat up. I know if my hands & feet are warm, I’m usually comfortable. Ask Santa!
Tomorrow, on the road again. I’m not used to driving now that we stayed in Texas for 6 days. But counting down to home.
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For anyone who has a dog, I just saw on morning news which features a segment with SPCA advocate Carol Erikson, that feeding a dog dark meat turkey can be deadly! I was a vet tech for 3 years and didn't know that. I knew about other things like chocolate, but not dark meat turkey. Good to know before Thanksgiving!
Cindy, I can totally relate about grandkids. We haven't seen our son and family in 3 years due to Covid and health issues! Definitely will see them in new year! I also agree about snow and I want to thank you for stirring up some wonderful snow memories that were buried way back in my brain! I too skated on frozen ponds, also went sledding down a hill that had a creek at the bottom. Most of the time the creek froze over so no issues, but sometimes it didn't, and my siblings and I would go home soaked and cold! After my fall in our living room a week after surgery, I am even more terrified of slipping on ice after a snowfall! Falling, even if not injured from the fall, is no joking matter when one has great difficulty getting back up! I read some here mentioned doing exercises to get up from the floor and that is one of my top priorities too!
Sun is out today and I am so thankful for that. I always find that the sun makes me feel better, even if I am feeling ok to begin with!
Stay safe and warm everyone and enjoy your Sunday!
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We need to find the courage to say NO to the things and people that are not serving us if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity.
Barbara De Angelis0 -
My parents were avid ice and roller skaters, so as soon as we could walk we were on some form of skate. Skating on the local lakes with retreats to the big barrel bonfires to warm up at was a treat. We swam in the same lakes in the summer. My DB lives close to them now but with climate change, I am not sure they freeze as they used to. As far as snow, I like the purity of the first snowfall and the peace it seems to project until the first plow comes through our road. At this age, I enjoy it more from indoors and limit trips outdoors to those of necessity. I need to train Regan to use the long lead in the backyard so I don't have to walk her in snow. So one storm is enough for me and if I lived in Buffalo right now, I'd be looking to move. Falls are a big concern as well with our hill and sloping driveway.
Cindyny: your trip has been enjoyable to read about and I am sure you will be glad to get home in FL.
Mary: Although your sales at the show seem slight, the fact that people took cards is a good sign. I wish I could find someone with better sewing skills than mine locally. I do have a tailor I use to shorten jacket sleeves and pants (even petites are too long) but she is expensive especially if the items are lined. I'd love to find someone who does drapes. I have done some drapes, including lining them but I do not know how to make the pleated tops.
It is sunny but freezing cold today. The temps are in the low 30's but the wind is whipping the flag in my neighbors yard which I use as a yardstick for breezes. They wind chill makes it feel 10 degrees colder. I will limit my times outdoors because I find it hard to get warm again once outside. Layering works but after awhile you have so many on you feel like the Michelin man or the Pillsbury dough boy.
Hope everyone has a good Sunday.
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