Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
Comments
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Blondie, What adorable grandchildren you have!!! Glad you are felling well.Mommarch, So very sorry for your husband's accident. You certainly didn't need that on your plate, but it sounds like you are both coping so well. Prayers always for you and your husband too!
Sandra & Mike, Prayers always for you too.
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I keep up with you every day on my email, though I don't post much.
Praying for those of you who are having difficult times, and for your families. I know many of you have grown close over the years. Back when my daughter was diagnosed I found WebMD's BC boards. Went to several gatherings of the ladies and was thankful they accepted me as a Mom , at the time not a survivor. Though no longer on WebMD , they still have a pink bus site, and I have known many for almost 20 years. The friendships you develop here you will treasure. As you say we laugh and cry with each other.
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Blondie, Your grandchildren are all beautiful. Glad you're pain free and comfortable. Sending good thought, prayers and hugs.
Mariejke, NY and CA. sounds like a great trip. We visited the Netherlands when our 3rd son was dating a girl from there and he was doing a 6 month internship with the Tilford police dept. and 6 months of college. They had gone together since she was an exchange student here and went together over 5 years. They stayed friends but both married other people from other countries. Your country was beautiful. We also traveled to Germany and Switzerland We wished we had more than two weeks to see more but had to come back to work..
Mommarch, So sorry for your husband's accident. Prayers for you and your husband too!
Prayers to Sandra and Mike.
A lazy cold and windy day here after a day of rain yesterday.
Hope everyone is enjoying their weekend
Emma
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Blondie! I was just about to PM you! Glad Hospice is working out so well for you. Hospice workers are absolute ANGELS on earth.
Mommarch, girl - if it wasn't for bad luck, your family wouldn't have any luck at all. Healing thoughts to your husband.
My husband snapped a few pictures of the backyard yesterday because it looked like something out of a magazine compared to what it was six weeks ago. It finally stopped raining long enough for daughter Allison and I to repair all the tile and re-plaster the pool in many places. It took 3 full days, 30 pounds of pool patching materials, then 24 hours to fill the pool again. We haven't used the pool since 2012. I had my stroke in January 2013, followed by 6 breast cancer surgeries and recoveries in 15 months through 2014 so no pool for me. Mike was getting sick in 2014 although we didn't realize it. He had no energy to work on the pool. Since I couldn't go in anyway, he just never bothered with it. Allison and I drained the green mess in March, again two weeks ago after all the rain in April and early May, and a 3rd time last week due to 2 feet of new rain from our awful storms. The whole back yard looks marvelous now and is a real testament to all our hard work. We're still working on projects inside as well but will soon be out of those we can do ourselves. My energy level is down after four straight months of intense manual labor but I'm doing my best to keep up with my daughter who is 24 years younger. So far we're even - thanks to Tylenol and an earlier bedtime for me. Mike continues to do ok. Chemo round 5 starts Monday.
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Sandra, That is really lovely. I can imagine how much work it was, but what wonderful results! Hope you're able to take it easier soon and enjoy sitting out. Good luck to both of you.
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Just because you aren't on your knees in church or sitting still in a cramped position doesn't mean you can't be talking to God. Just because both you and God are busy doesn't mean you can't be in touch. Such times are the sacred part of the secret life. Such times keep my soul sane.
Robert Fulghum
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WELCOME Mary from Holland -- you are the perfect age to be here. The easy chairs are all quite comfy and the coffee pot is always on.......
Big surprise -- I stayed at work until late this afternoon. Good to be home now. I did a couple of hours of cleaning and couple of loads of laundry and then sat down here. So much happening in the short while I was gone. I'm tired and my head is spinning, and even if I'm not able to say something about Carole's mom and her issues or Chevy's friend or our children......I hope you know I certainly had deep feelings about each and everyone as I read what you wrote. You are all such special, special people and so very special to me.
Coming here every day -- sharing a quote, or just saying a word or two just makes me feel like I'm sitting right next to all of you. I will be back in the morning and hoping I'm not nearly as drained out. My bank acct. is going to look nice though. I work for such great people.
Blessings to all and you are in my hear Blondie and Cammie.
Jackie
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Sandra - I am so impressed with the pool & yard job. I actually had my pool filled in after several skin cancers because I could no longer be in the sun to take care of it in a daily basis. I miss it all the time but am grateful I didn't have to deal w/it during BC. Gee girl - are you ever going to take some time for you? Like even a spa or a mani/pedi. My favorite used book store closed today so now I'll have to figure out how to make a trip to San Antonio to visit yours.
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Sandra - beautiful pool!! We got back from a cruise to Alaska yesterday. Hubby went fishing while we were in Sitka so I strolled around town and shopped. We had a great trip and thought of meeting you and Mike while you visited Seattle. We hope the best for you both.0 -
welcome back Jackie!
Sandra, the pool is lovely, what a pretty place for you to sit and have a relaxing glass of iced tea
We were in the Minneapolis area over the weekend, visited my Dad and saw granddaughter dance her spring recital. She lives and breathes dance and has been accepted to a dance high school for this fall.
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What pretty pictures! Sandra's pool and back yard and Puffin's lovely granddaughter.
And welcome back, Jackie! There was definitely someone missing for several days.
I've never had a pool but I had a fountain on my patio until last spring. At that time dh and I decided to eliminate it and not buy a new one. I was tired of cleaning it periodically and keeping it filled. The sound of the water was a pleasure but I'm glad to be rid of caring for it.
Today I'm determined to accomplish something. So I will FORCE myself to straighten up the office and deal with all the piles of papers on the desk and shred the basket of papers. This was one of the post-surgery projects that haven't gotten done.
Wishing everyone a good Monday.
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Success means we go to sleep at night knowing that our talents and abilities were used in a way that served others.
Marianne
Williamson0 -
Oh it's not a lovely morning ( boo-hoo ) with no sun out --- but the great news is ---- it's not raining. We had a couple of storms -- like major pour-downs while I was gone, but I think no more of that for awhile. It has been a rather "wild" May in that way and is more like what we expect to see in April. I just hope it slows for everyone. So many states are having flooding issues -- not to mention bad tornado or straight line winds. Maybe Dh will get the drive-way cleared of little twiggy limbs and leaves that collect from wind and rain.
I think the pool is fantastic as well Sandra. Makes me want to rush right over in fact. Puffin -- such great news and I think I can feel the inner sigh of relief because I think it is nearly the same kind we all get when we "pass" our tests after our first yr. is done.
Looking at the pic of your grand-daughter too Puff. I had a second cousin who absolutely lived and breathed dance until she got married. Still did it afterwards ( after 12 children that is ) and she maintained the same delicately muscular body and you'd have been hard put to even consider her having children -- much less 12 of them. Of course, she and her husband were wonderful parents easily capable of supporting that many children and absolutely having more than enough love for them at the same time.
Life is such an adventure isn't it ????
Hope Monday is magnificent for all.
Blessings
Jackie
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The pool is so nice, think we shud get together and have a POOL PARTY!
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Oh that pool and the surrounding area looks wonderful. It reminds me of all those lovely days by the pool during the winter in Florida! Great job, Sandra! You have a lovely place to escape!
Welcome back, Jackie. You were missed!
Puffin...what lovely granddaughter you have. I hope she follows her dream of dancing!
Happy shredding, Carole. I should tackle that same job around here but I keep procrastinating.
The sun is trying to peek through the clouds but it is still too cool here to spend lots of time outside today so I'm working inside and writing some scholar bowl questions. I did go to exercise class this morning and I have a busy day tomorrow....hair cut and color, dentist (yuck) and late afternoon golf!
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Patting myself on the back for accomplishing the office project! I got to it right away after I had my breakfast smoothie. Which reminds me, Jackie, I still love the Nutri-Bullet and am so glad I took a gamble and bought it.
Rita, you make me a little envious when you say it's too cool to be outside. Sounds good to me. Our a/c has been going almost full time since April.
It's sunny here today and undoubtedly hot and humid outside. I've been inside all day. I'm planning to go to WW at 6:30 pm.
Hope the day is going well for everyone.
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Brrrrr , 48 here this morning and more rain. Turned on the electric fireplace! Don't know if we will venture out to Wally Mart or not.
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Good morning, everyone. It's sunny outside. My big outing for the day is an appointment with my foot dr. Tomorrow it will be 3 weeks since my surgery. The little incision looks good. The foot does not feel "normal." But perhaps it never will. I'll withhold judgment on the outcome of the surgery until more time has passed.
I'm hoping to get the rest of the placemats sewed today. Then I'll take some pictures and post one or two.
Wishing everyone a good Tuesday.
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Port is OUT!, No shower for 48 hours, no swimming for 3 weeks. Hard to believe it's 10 days short of being a year since my lumpectomy.
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Yay, Puffin!
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Good news Puffin! You on your way to better health!
Jo
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Hey Puffin....GREAT news. You are now a member of the "no more port club!"
Can't wait to see your placemat project, Carole!
The sun is shining so I'm off to clean off the back deck and then play nine holes of golf!
I hope everyone is having a good day!
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The key to happiness is inner peace.
The greatest obstacles to inner peace are disturbing emotions
such as anger, attachment, fear and suspicion,
while love and compassion and a sense of universal responsibility
are the sources of peace and happiness.
- Dalai Lama0 -
Here late again today so bit oops from me. Had a few extra things to do today ( this morning ) and a few extra ( not bad mind you ) at work so all in all --- I just didn't get to my computer until now. A few more items on the horizon. Tomorrow we go to lunch at my cousin Mary's house. A little family luncheon. My Aunt Mary from California passed a couple of weeks ago and since we have discussed strokes for a bit --- she had one three years or so ago and for the most part has never been the same. No talking etc. Well, she fell ill again a few weeks ago ( likely another stroke as well ) along with pneumonia and some other complication. Was only back home a couple of days and she passed on.
Hard to say it was a blessing, but it was. Anyway we will have the family luncheon tomorrow and then the funeral on Friday and then on Saturday will go to Ballwin, Missouri for another family get-together. So sort of an up and down week, but you just keep going till its all done. I'll rest next week when things slow back to what I hope will be a normal pace.
Just sitting here using my key to happiness and inner peace.
(((((Puff)))))
Blessings
Jackie
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When reading about your aunt, Jackie, I realized that I did not post here that my husband's aunt died two weeks ago now. She had breast cancer about 10 years ago, and they found that it had metastasized to her liver last winter. She attempted chemo, but it was just too late. Her children were all with her at the end. They have not, however, made any mention of a funeral, at least not to the rest of the family, so we're all at a bit of a loss. We don't know where she is buried or anything - even her sister (hubby's Mom) wasn't told. People can get really strange about the death of a loved one. My husband and I decided we would just say our own private goodbyes. If there is an afterlife, she'll know. If there isn't, it still helps us with our own closure.
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GG -- sorry about Dh's Aunt. You are right to just do now what gives you comfort. I believe in an afterlife -- and also that we are specifically here on Earth right now because our souls ( not bodies, minds, personalities or anything else like that ) but just our Souls grow much quicker in an environment where there are so many, many negative events and if your ready for this one -- negative souls.
All souls have some negativity -- but there is a difference -- those who can really grow well have figured out that they have some negativity and don't give it much life. Generally are able to figure which is which ( even some of our family members get caught up in being more negative than anything ) and while it is bothersome, for your own soul's sake you generally know when it is time to remove yourself in a way so as to not be continually affected by their negativity.
Ok.....I'm doing a TMI I think and some of this is just MOHO about life and how it works --- I sort of look at it this way --- I'm either going to end up with the surprise of my life ( and that is if I will even be aware that nothing comes after my body is no longer necessary ), or it is going to be the very absolute highest and most joyous occasion it ever could be. I have been opting for the latter version for sure for the last 18 yrs. or so. I haven't proved the former ( since I haven't died as yet ) but at the same time I've nothing that disproves it either. So --- that said, I think your Dh's Aunt will know that you love and miss her .
Jackie
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I believe one of our souls' major purposes is to know, love, and express our authentic selves. To live the life and be the person we were created to be. However, our true selves only emerge when it's safe to do so. Self-condemnation, shame, and guilt send your true nature into hiding. It's only in the safety of gentle curiosity, encouragement, and self-love that your soul can bloom as it was created to do.
Sue Patton Thoele
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Wow !!! I get to be first here today unless someone is typing along with me here right now and finishes first. We will have sun today ( not as strong as I'd like ) but never-the-less, I will enjoy it and the warmer temps. it will bring. This morning we had to turn on the I-heater to take the chill out of the living room. Dh is a bit colder than I am --- but then sometimes it just depends on how many animals pile on us, as to how "warm" we may get in the morning. I think we really did need that heater on for a bit.
Anyway, hope you are all going to have a positive and happy day. We are meeting over at my cousin's house for a "easy" family lunch. My cousin, Rebecca and her husband are here from California. A sad occasion actually since my Aunt Mary passed and will be buried here along with her husband -- and all of us have walked the road before, however reluctantly of choosing how to deal with final wishes of our parents or other loved ones. I am ambivalent -- very sad that I've only one Aunt remaining --- but glad that Aunt Mary is freed from living a life she could no longer actually be very much a part of, in the ways she always enjoyed.
So -- lots to do today -- and work tomorrow, then the funeral Friday -- then another family get-together in Missouri Saturday. We are actually quite close to Missouri where we live -- it is about 75 miles almost due west of us. In fact, many people work there every day, but I think I'd never want to drive that far to work daily. Also, the better shopping is there along with different forms of entertainment.
A lot going on in the world, but since my little job interval ( I didn't have a lot of time there ) I haven't paid near as much attention to the current news and am a little out of the loop. It used to be such a big part of my day. Well, I'll likely get back but I have to say --- I'm happier in some ways not "dealing" quite so strongly in all the "going on's " that make up the world at large and my area in particular. It is a nice freedom for a while.
I will see you all later.
Blessings,
Jackie
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Morning all. Today hubby is going fishing - but I'm staying home and getting caught up on laundry and hopefully some gardening as well. The weeds are VERY happy, so it's time to get them out of there. Also, the daffodil and dutch iris "greens" are now getting to the yellow stage and time to remove them. I doubt I can get the entire yard done today, but I should be able to make a sizeable dent.
I need to put in some ground cover type plants where I have bulbs planted, but will need to figure out what I want to see there before I go to the nursery again... 0 -
Morning all
GG & Jackie-sorry for the loss of your Aunts. Like you, Jackie, I have only one Aunt left- she is 96 and living with one of her daugter's who is incredibly kind and patient with her. My Aunt uses a walker, and spend most of her day in their closed-in sun porch. Her long term memory is great, but short term is shot. Her kids are all very close to her. She raised her 5 children in Canada and she is now in Vero Beach, Fl. The two kids still in Canada come to visit frequently- the son once every six weeks so his sister can get away for a weekend. The oldest daughter lives in Arizona and FaceTimes every day as does the son who visits every six weeks. As wonderful as they are, unfortunately, the SIL she lives with hates her and having to have her in their house. He had no problem telling me he wishes she would go ahead and die already. He has always been a self-centered jerk, who required his wife's total attention, to the point that their relationship with their own two kids is distant, both emotionally and geographically. She on the other hand, is always in a good mood and takes her limitations in stride, with no self pity at all.
My oldest son has begun his crazy summer. He drove down Fri nite to run the orientation for the camp counselors on Sun. He flew home Mon morning, for the final week of school and to be at graduation, leaving his car here. He flies back next Sun and camp starts Mon. He will fly back to So. Carolina on June 25th to be with his daughter on her second birthday ( the 26th). Then he will drive back with his family on the 27th and go back to camp on the 28th, doing the reverse a couple of weeks later. Then he will fly home for a long weekend at the end of July, and finally drive home the final Fri evening of camp to go back to teaching that Mon.
My 2grandchildren were in their school talent show the night Rob was driving down. As a reward for participating, their parent decided to take them to Jaxson's- a very popular ice cream parlor here. It opened in 1956. The wait to get in was over 2 hours. We got there at 8:30 and weren't seated till 10:45. I usually do not drive by myself that late at night, but had no choice. Luckily it was a very easy drive, but I told Rob I would call him while I was driving home. He was in St Augustine when we got to the restaurant and by the time I was on my way home, he was hitting the north end of Ft Lauderdale. We got to the house less than a half hour apart, close to 1am. I am still trying to recover.
Anne
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