Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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We rented a house that had a carport. It worked pretty well. Kept moisture off at night so didn't need to scrape in the morning. Gave some protection from the sun.
My Dad built storage shelves hanging from the attic in the garage. And he hung a string at the point he wanted the hood ornament. When he touched that, the car was parked correctly.
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We are believers in the advantages of parking vehicles under cover. The sun is very destructive. We have a two-car carport and it is kept clear for my car and dh's truck. We do have an attic and outbuildings. I am of the mind that people wouldn't keep so much unneeded "stuff" if they didn't have room for it.
This morning I started working on the yard. I got the two front flowerbeds weeded and one mulched with pine straw. I would have gotten the other one done but was interrupted when dh got the big lawn mower stuck in a spot that he darned well knows is low. We tried to get it out of the muck using a come-a-long and rope tied to a tree but weren't successful. The neighbors came home from church and he changed clothes and drove his tractor over and pulled the lawn mower onto dry turf. DH continued mowing until the lawn mower developed a problem that caused it to heat up and smell like burning. DH thinks a bearing is bad. He'll order one and fix the mower. Rosanna Dana was right. It's always something.
This afternoon I plan to finish up my nephew's federal return. His live-in girl friend was employed for only two months last year so he'll be able to claim her as a dependent. Otherwise he was going to have to pay some extra instead of getting a refund, which he was depending on to pay toward a better vehicle for driving to work.
Happy Sunday to all.
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I grew up in Florida where we didn't have basements or attics. The same is true here in Texas. We do have a small space over part of the 2 car garage but it's hard to get up into. Haven't been up there in years. Also haven't parked a car in the garage in about 30 years. Garages are for "stuff" you don't want in your house but need to keep sort of close. (Plus all sorts of junk you have no idea how it got there.) Fortunately we don't have to deal with snow so most everyone parks in their driveways.
Mike came home yesterday afternoon. It was a surprise...we though he would be there at least through the weekend, but his doctor said his lab numbers were still going up so why wait? Today I didn't have to drive to the hospital. How strange! I made 33 trips. I have to take him back Monday at 8 a.m. for lab tests and probably he will stay for blood transfusion, platelet transfusion, or whatever else is too low. We will be going back and forth like that most days for the next week or two, then hope to spread it out until it's only once a week. Things with my son are still bad. There is some concern that he might hurt Allison, whom he blames for everything, since he is heading into a psychotic break again and is, of course, still drinking. He has bragged about how he could come in the middle of the night and warned that he will kick the door in if we change the locks. Mike has, unfortunately, gotten into the middle of it. He often can talk to Ryan. I hope it works this time.
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Oh Sandra, things can sure change fast, huh !!! I hope Mike feels lots and lots of comfort being in his OWN home. Hope it all goes very smooth sailing now. Worrisome that Ryan is still being challenging and I sure hope he will not do anything foolish. He is the hold-out right now but maybe having Mike home and able to talk to him will have a soothing positive effect.
It will be good to alter your daily journeys to the hospital even though you will go for labs and infusions but now it is a matter of working on the finish line which is wellness and being able to live outside of isolation and clean rooms. Wishing you both and Allison some peace and comfort and a little less stress. Wishing for Ryan a big break away from his self medicating so that he might have some rest and healing for a while.
Lots of love and positive healing energies.
Jackie
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Oh good news Sandra! Things are looking up after all!
As far as your Son.... that would really have me scared, thinking that he might hurt your Daughter! I would be terrified. Doesn't seem to be any consequences for him, making all those threats.
Is there some resource you could call, starting with the local non-emergency police department, asking them what options you have.... or what agencies could help you? It's like something has to happen before anyone gets help. He is out of control, fueled by the drinking, and when he gets over the top, I would not want to be any where around him.... especially with Mike...
Is there any way a Doctor could step in, and help your Son live in a mandated rehab center? And not be able to leave when he wants out? I'm saying prayers for the help your family needs.
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Sandra, excellent news about Mike's progress. Your son needs to be prevented somehow from hurting anyone, including his sister. As Chevy said, he seems to have no consequences for his behavior. I hope that in some way Mike's being involved will be good, not bad, for Mike's recovery.
My day is planned as follows: yard work in the morning, nursing home in the afternoon. My sister Michelle and I take turns going to the nursing home.
A good Monday to all.
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Acceptance confers great freedom. It's a recognition of reality, and once you've achieved that grounding, it's moving forward. Embrace acceptance as another mode of love in action, one that releases your negative attachment to people and frees you to progress in even more challenging virtues that foster spirituality without judgment.
Michael Goddart
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Great news Sandra!!
Anne
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Humility does not mean false modesty. Humility does not mean taking a back seat. When you take a back seat consciously and deliberately in order to show others how humble you are, you are not being humble at all. False humility is what slaves show to their masters. Slaves know that if they do not obey their masters blindly, if they do not show this kind of outer humility, the master will punish them. True humility is something totally different; it is the feeling of oneness. Humility means giving joy to others. Here on earth we want to get joy. But how do we get joy? Real joy we get from self-giving, not by possessing or by showing our own supremacy. When we allow others to get joy, then we feel that our joy is more complete, more perfect, more divine. By making others feel that they are either equally important or more important, we show our
true humility.
Sri Chinmoy0 -
Good Morning Ladies......I am one of the older ladies being diagnosed w/ bc in 2010. I have a question for those of you that are on Tamoxifen. I am in my sixth year and now I am losing my hair again. It is sufficient amounts.......everytime I run the sweeper I have to clean the beater bar & get a small handful of MY hair. Does anyone take something extra as in herbs or vitamins like Evening Primrose Oil without the estrogen or Saw Palmetto ? I am so upset that by the time I finish the ten year stint I will be bald. Any suggestions or input would be greatly appreciated.
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Hi NormaJ.... I took Tamoxifen for only 1 1/2 years.... and I DID notice my hair thinning.... but the reason I quit taking it, was because I had a small "infarct" in my brain-stem, near the 8th cranial nerve.... In other words I lost most of my hearing.
I quit Tamoxifen, after I researched, and found it WAS listed as one of the SE's... stroke. As well as Cataracts, etc..... I would have kept taking it, but losing my hearing was just too much.... I'm going on 6 years now! Talk to your Onco.... Not that that will know anything, because mine sure couldn't help... but everyone is different.
Sometimes you just have to figure out what is best for YOU.... Are the SE's worth it? I read about taking all the supplements, vitamins, etc.... but my hair is STILL thin.... just not thinning anymore, like it was... But like I said.... I don't take anything anymore......
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Norma, I cannot give you feedback because I didn't take Tamoxifen. I took arimidex for 5 years. Sorry about the hair loss. I don't suppose you've started a new medication.
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I can't add much ( so wish I could ) since I did Arimidex, but isn't there a 'female' Rogaine that would help with thinning hair -- and maybe you could be switched to something else for your remaining yrs. I would be un-happy too. It is not so hard to go a few months hairless to do your chemo, but we all became soooo ok with bad hair days again after that.
Wishing you well Norma Jean and I hope you can find some good answers.
Jackie
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First time here today as I didn't have enough time before work to write anything. Another nice day in southern Illinois. Cooler by a bit than it has been but still just fine for me. We have many ( our lawn is almost two acres ) trees on our property -- too numerous to count -- and there are so many twigs, sticks, limbs and debris from the trees. It will be a two person chore that will take several hours. Not looking forward to that.
I'm sure there is likely rain somewhere in our forecast, but the last three days have been nice an dry. We are already starting to have some difficulty being able to see some of the houses around us -- just the way we like things. Soon it will be difficult to tell there is much of anyone around save for the three houses on our lane.
I hope you are all having a wonderful day.
Jackie
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Hi everyone,
My oldest DD has gone back to Ga. What a weekend!! There was laughter, but more stress than anything else. Nancy flew down (flying alone for the first time ever) to meet Alex and help Jamie. Most days she was here, Jamie didn't get here till afternoon. Nancy was beside herself when she found out that, other than the bath at the hospital, Alex had not been bathed. It had to be basically a sponge bath because she still had the umbilical cord end. It fell off before Nancy left, so she was able to give Alex her first real bath. Have to admit, she did smell like a baby after the bath. As far as helping Jamie- she is fine with us holding, burping, changing and bathing Alex, but refuses any kind of help outside of this house. It's like she has to prove she can handle 3 kids all by herself. Problem is, without us, she has no help or support. She is beyond exhausted - her husband won't even drive the other two kids to school, which is aBout a 45 minute round trip, because they use my address to have the kids in a good school.
But that was not the cause of the stress. Nancy loves to clean aNd is almost compulsive about it. So she cleaned, which Tracy sees as an insult to her level of cleaning. Nancy did several loads of laundry every day. Tracy only does laundry on the weekends. More perceived insult. So Tracy's reaction- stay drunk the whole time Nancy is here. WHich is bad enough, but Nancy (who refuses to admit she is anything like Tracy) drank 5 bottles of wine in four days. Not thin bottles either. She does not get "drunk" like Tracy, but 5 bottles?? And all three of them told me daily how bad the other two are.
Nancy has decided I need to kick Tracy out. First problem, Tracy's son, who has two troubled parents. He needs me because I am the only stable "parent" he has. Second problem, I can't afford the bills here on my own. Third, there is no way I can keep up with the cleaning inside, much less the yard work. If Tracy were to move out, which she would love to do, there would be the issue of Jamie and family moving in- went thru this last summer- not an option. As little as I see of her husband, every time I do see him, I find I dislike him more and more.
So, if I take a survey of my kids, I have two alcoholics, one son in a mess of a marriage, and a daughter who lives with three kids in a ware house with the goal of moving in to an old boxcar in the middle of no where. The only one that is okay is my youngest son, who everyone thought would be the loser in the family. He has a good job, a wonderful fiancée and is the president of a not- for-profit organization targeting kids growing up in the foster care system.
Vent over! Thanks for letting me get it out.
Anne
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Anne, you do have your hands full and it is nice to vent. It is one of the things I treasure most about coming here. I seldom bother with much venting in my own life. I don't know that its better a lot of the time, but while my adult children have issues, they do live away from me so some of the STRESS I might have isn't close enough to have a bad effect. Furiously knocking on wood here.
I think your family ( kids ) are somewhat typical. They all see what is wrong --- with everyone else. They also freely give you advice that is mostly un-workable. There is a familiar ring there for sure. Also was not surprised that the ne'er-do-well turns out the best of the bunch. Some times we just have to look for the things that are right to give us a boost and keep us going till some of the other parts go right or at least get way better. That is what I hope for you.
See you all later.
Jackie
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Anne, unfortunately I understand completely. <sigh>
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Although many of us probably didn't get a thorough education in the value of a positive attitude, we can teach ourselves. Simply by making a decision to look for the good, happy, and beautiful in all things and all people, you will have completed the first and most important step in learning to accentuate the positive.
Sue Patton Thoele
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Hoping when I check again, this will be back in my favorites list. I know some of you have lost some things from time to time out of your LIST. This is the first time for me I think from Older Women. Glad I re-found it.
I had to do a heavy clean up cycle with Microsoft, and worked all day yesterday to get my ability to drop in memes and photo's into parts of the blog so hopefully I'll have no more issues now that everything is cleaned up and hopefully in tip-top form. I'll be checking in later too.
Blessings,
Jackie
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Just checking in to say I've had an enjoyable day. I played golf the first part of the day and had a much better score than I've been having. Afterwards I stayed for lunch. My bacon, tomato, avocado sandwich was so big that I brought half of it home and half of the sweet potato fries, too. DH is at the golf course this afternoon.
Now I need to talk to my sister and my mother and find out how things are going today with my mother's rehabilitation. I'm feeling stress because the end of May will soon be here and with it the time for going north to MN. DH has already asked whether I'll want him to go up by himself. That hardly seems fair to him. Life is seldom simple, is it?
Jackie, hope you've solved all your computer problems.
Hi to everyone.
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I think I do have my computer woes sort of ok. I do find it is a bit harder to put things in ( pics and meme's ) but I guess I can still learn some tricks -- just would like not to have too. Don't know that I mentioned it here but Picasa is being phased out ( more or less ) and phased into Google plus pictures. That is a mite worrisome. Google is really big and I'm thinking maybe --- advantageous somewhere down the road for Google. My suspicious mind at work maybe, but in any case -- still didn't hurt getting the major tune-up from Microsoft. I also put Mozilla in as sometimes it smooths out rough patches.
Carole, maybe you could delay your trip a week or two depending on your Mom's progress and status ( home or nursing home ) if you don't get clear-cut answers for a while. It is a real dilemma.
Our morning was not too bad, but around noon it commenced to rain and it hasn't much let up but has been fairly light at times. Well, at least it is keeping my car a little cleaner. Sadly, our lane has some pot-holes from the big heavy garbage truck that uses it once a week, and if those holes fill again I will end up with mud and another trip to the car wash. Our weather is fairly in-consistent for car washing this early.
Hope it gets better, but I think rain is on for tomorrow too.
See you all .
Jackie
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Simply give others a bit of yourself: a thoughtful act, a helpful
idea, a word of appreciation, a lift over a rough spot, a sense
of understanding, a timely suggestion. You take something out
of your mind, garnished in kindness out of your heart, and put
it into the other person's mind and heart.
Charles H. Burr0 -
Had rain yesterday for most of the afternoon. Very late it stopped and the sun came out. Still fairly wet out this a.m. but the sun is out for now. Their are clouds though and it won't get real warm either, but won't be cold, sigh !!!! Just hoping there won't be any more rain in those clouds. I can get enough rain pretty easy. Well, it is not the rain but the gray that comes with it. I find that I have to turn on ( and talk too ) the On-Star people who are bugging the dealership where I got my car. It's 5 yrs. old --- but ah-ha, a new owner who might sign up to On-Star. I'm being goaded by Sirius Radio as well.
I don't take extras because I can't afford extras ( or don't feel it is good use for me for my funds ) but to placate everyone I guess I will have to TAKE the free trial anyway. What On Star --- I need directions to my cat feeding areas. Not that there aren't area's an On Star wouldn't be nice, but I'm so seldom in any of those places with my car that it would be a complete waste of money. Same with the radio -- I often don't bother using my radio, and certainly not enough to justify paying for a no commercials radio service. So -- today we will set those up I guess, ggrrr.
Hoping to get back here later on. Thinking of Puffin and Sandra & Mike.
Jackie
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Morning all.
Just checking in. My life went from crazy to quiet incredibly quickly. My biggest problem now is that one of my tires needs air and I'm not sure how to remedy that. I have never been without a guy around to do these things. I know "how" to put air in the tires- I've watched my husband do it a million times. I just don't know where to go or how to know when it's full. I really don't want to take it to Tire Kngdom because they will tell me I need new tires and I don't know enough to know if I do or not. And I am not sure I could make it to the car dealership without it going completely flat. My DD says our neighbor next door can do it at his house.His hobby is buying and restoring old cars, so I think maybe she's right. My solution- don't go anywhere till its fixed.
The house is very quiet now that my DD went back to Ga. Jamie didn't come by at all on Tues. She came over yesterday about 2:30, because Victoria had a soccer game last night. The baby was very uncomfortable and cried a lot. Jamie nursed her about 6x between getting here and going to the soccer game. I finally texted to Nancy- come quick, Alex needs you! (In all caps) she texted back immediately - either she's too full or Jamie ate something that is cramping her. She said to try a bath. We did, and she caLmed down during the bath, then once sHe was dressed, Jamie nursed her agaIn for a short while. She slept all thru the soccer game. Jamie and the other two kids look exhausted. Kayden (7) cried three times at the soccer game, which is very unlike him. I so wish JAmie would let us help more. She said she is thinking of pumping the milk in to bottles so someone else can feed her and she can sleep more than an hour and a half at a time. She knows we all thought she was crazy to have a third becaUse of her circumstances, and seems to be hellbent on proving she can handle 3 kids and her normal routine. Problem is, whether having another baby was a good decision or not is no longer an issue. Alex is here and being the family we are, she was welcomed with open arms and each of us would do anything to help. Victoria has had two Sat morning soccer games. They start at noon- Jamie has been late for both. I had the kids here last weekend so we were there on time. Jamie got there for the last ten minutes. So I suggested the kids stay here on Friday nights. So far, she says no. This is the first time with a child in sports and she doesn't understand that Victoria being late will affect the whole team.
That is about it from here. Looking forward to a quiet day.
Anne
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Thank you ladies that responded to my post about the hair loss. I can't take the AIs as they make my bones hurt so badly. I could hardly get out of bed and since my BC was a grade 3 I am left with very few options. I still am going to go to my PCP to have a full thyroid panel done to see if that will turn up anything. :-( I would really like to cut it off really short but I have a few bald places in the top........so I am like an old man with a "comb over". :-) My hair is nothing like what I had prior to Chemo.........less hair, straight as a stick and can't do a thing with it but still don't want to lose what I do have.
Again thanks for responding. Chevyboy, I know how you feel about Tamoxifen........I am already deaf in one ear (since a child) & now have to wear a hearing aid. Thankfully my onco ran extensive blood work on me (16 vials) to make sure I wouldn't have a clotting problem.
Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend.
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Thanks Norma.... You know, sometimes I hate to say anything about THAT side-effect, because I don't want to scare people away from something they don't know.... and I know it DOES help some people..... Just not me.
Sorry about your hearing... My Onco never told me about a test to see if I had that certain gene..... Or about "clotting"....! I can "hear" with my hearing aids, but have SO much trouble with the feed-back and different shapes of the domes.... They are working with me, and I have another hearing test on the 1st... So maybe I will get help.
I'm so sorry about your hair.... work with your Doctors.... Maybe they have some idea on how to help? Also I know there are certain agencies that will give you a pretty wig.... or something to wear just when you want to.... Because never give up hope.... My friends that lost ALL their hair with chemo, (twice) now have a full head of hair!
If I had to get one, I would have a shorter one, maybe styled kind of like mine... so I wouldn't feel so different.... We USED to wear wigs and hair-pieces and "falls" all the time! I loved them! Maybe work with what you have? Maybe just a hair-piece?
If all of that doesn't fit your style, I'll send you a crochet cap! You're in Texas? Maybe too warm for a crochet hat? Ha!
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Your post about the cap at the very least gave myself & DH huge laugh. As for the blood work my onco ran on me was due to my port that quit working right before my last Herceptin infusion leaving me w/ a completely blocked my Jugular vein. It would only happen to me as I know their are a lot of people that keep their ports (why I don't know) and all they have to do is have the port irrigated on a regular basis.
Yep, it might be a little too "warm" here in Texas for a crocheted hat. Actually I never wore anything on my head after losing my hair......bald as a baby's butt. That was then when I knew it would come back. Losing it again for no apparent reason is a tad tough to swallow.
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Not this one?
I like this one.....
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Ah, you gals are just too, too funny. Wish we would have had more answers for you Norma. I hope you are able to find some sort of answer/adjustment that will suit you. I hated losing my hair, but knew that if all went well it would be a rather temporary thing. Bad part was that a really col winter was coming on, but I did make it through.
I also had dreams about what my hair would look like when it came back in. So many people said their former very straight hair ( me ) was curly. Also that their thin hair ( me -- thin and fine ) was thick and greatest of all --- a much nicer color. Well now, my reward for being bald through a long cold winter was coming -- and oh I could barely wait. The few 'sparse' little hairs were such a total delight. Then, the bad news, my hair was the same brown, only a little mousier than it had been, and it was just as thin and fine as ever. The only thing I can say is that I'm 70 and I still have the merest level of graying hair --- when I get a perm, you almost can't tell their is any. I do feel like my hair is thinning slightly from age I guess --- but for now, it is all there -- just super thin and fine which is why I do perms. They give lots of body and it makes my hair look much thicker than it actually is. Sigh !!!!
Chevy, those knitted caps are really cute.
Jackie
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We are all born with a belief in God. It may not have a name or face. We may not even see it as God.But it is there.It is the sense that comes over us as we stare into the starlit sky, or watch the last fiery rays of an evening sunset.It is the morning shiver as we wake on a beautiful day and smell a richness in the air that we know and love from somewhere we can't quite recall.It is the mystery behind the beginning of time and beyond the limits of space.It is a sense of otherness that brings alive something deep in our hearts. -Kent Nerburn
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