Class of 2009 - Sisters in the same time frame

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  • micheleboots
    micheleboots Member Posts: 885

    Welcome Wanda...

  • magob
    magob Member Posts: 242

    Hi Wanda.  Stay with us - we've got you covered.  And my best to all of you ladies.  Said a big prayer for all of us today.  XO, Mary

  • joanneasiata
    joanneasiata Member Posts: 305

    HI LADIES

    Im a bit sad and mad today my 22 yr old daughter has to have a mamo and ultra sound first thing she found a lump in here breast a while ago and  thought nothing of it she has big boobs and they are pretty lumpy and didn't think to tell me,  then 3 mnths ago while having her underarms waxed she noticed her gland also had a lump  F#$@KI REALLY HOPE ITS NOTHING  , I'm going with her   and im familiar with the people there they should be able to tell me something , the last thing i want is my daughter to go through this hell ill jump in her shoes  any time rather then see her  go through this I'm really worried ill let you know tomo .

  • Lilah
    Lilah Member Posts: 2,631

    Aw JoJo so sorry to hear this about your daughter. Saying prayers for her today and for you too that it is nothing.  She is far too young for this.

    Lilah

  • txstardust
    txstardust Member Posts: 180

    Oh Wow, Jojo, I know you're scared, but remember, most lumps are benign, and let's hope that's the case for your daughter.  This is the last thing you need to happen!  But, I'm glad your daughter is getting it checked out and not ignoring it.

    Welcome to you, Wanda.  I can't tell you anything about rads, because I haven't started yet myself, but I'm sure you'll get good tips on this board.  Only one more chemo left, hooray!

    I'm trying to be more positive about things on my end, but it's hard.  I muddled through and did my schoolwork (lesson plans and observations) yesterday, but they're really the worst work I've ever done.  I just wanted to finish them so I could relax today.  I'm not sure how good I'll be at relaxing, though!  I'm considering taking some yoga or tai chi classes or something, in hopes that it will help.  Anybody doing that?  Does it really make a difference?

    Peace to all....

    ~Shelby 

  • echosalvaje
    echosalvaje Member Posts: 73

    Shelby, I've done yoga thru this whole process. There were times that I was too sore from surgery or too weak from chemo, or had too much ooze from rads and all I could do was lay there with my feet up the wall and breathe. It always helped. It helped me to take my mind out of the disease for a bit. On the days that I could actually move around and do things it helped me regain range of motion in my arms and build my strength back up. Give it a try....oops, gotta go, yoga starts in 30 minutes :)

  • sugar77
    sugar77 Member Posts: 1,328

    Echosalvaje - yoga sound good. I think I'm going to try it.  Through chemo, I've been doing Reiki as well as daily walks on my treadmill but I think yoga would help, too.

    Sherri 

  • jburke1
    jburke1 Member Posts: 258

    Welcome Wanda- Sorry you had to join us, but you will find a lot of support here :)

    JoJo- I am praying for you and your daughter that the lump is b-9. She is far too young to have to worry about BC. Please keep us posted. Hugs to you!

    I did a couple yoga classes. I found it loosened me up a bit and relaxed me. I haven't done one in a while. I also wanted to try Reiki but haven't yet gotten the chance to try it yet. Sherri, can you tell me a little bit about it? Does it help?

    Hope everyone is having a great day! It is sunny here in Chicago, so can't complain too much. I'll take it, but I can't wait for Spring!

    Hugs

    Jen

  • micheleboots
    micheleboots Member Posts: 885

    Wanda, once again wanted to say welcome...I only gave a drive-by welcome last time...you will love this thread. It has helped me keep my sanity...or what was left of it..feel free to rant, rave, cheer, cry, and most importantly, laugh with us.

    Jojo, like Shelby said most lumps turn out to b nothing...she is young so she has that gong for her...saying prayers anyhow.Kiss

     I would love to take up Yoga again...there is a new fitness club opening up about a minute from me so I think I might look into joining...perhaps in a few weeks..right now I have no energy in my legs and I think I would just be throwing my $ out the window.

  • PauldingMom
    PauldingMom Member Posts: 392

    Well heck ladies, I didn't see ya here! I am from the Class of 2009 as is my Mom. We both went through surgery and chemo. in 2009. I also did rads. Now things are much better. It does seem sometimes that I wonder if this little ache or pain has anything to do with my treatments. I'm trying to find answers to questions like why then heck my hands are always so dang cold. Anyone suffering, yes I said suffering because sometimes it's so bad I can't move them normally. 

    Adding this group to my favorites. Glad to be here.  

  • micheleboots
    micheleboots Member Posts: 885

    Pauldingmom.   welcome.  Good to have a new member, sad that you have to be here...by the way love your picture...tooo funny.

  • sugar77
    sugar77 Member Posts: 1,328

    Jen - I'm pretty new at Reiki myself but so far I quite like it.  A lady who lives near me is a Reiki master and I've been going to her house, so it's very comfortable and I've known her for a while.  It's a type of therapy where you get energy for healing.  The practitioner lays their hands above your body or sometimes lightly touching you.  You can really feel the energy.  I find it very relaxing. I'd like to know how to do it so I could calm down my very hyper bichon-poodle! lol If you Google Reiki, you'll find a lot of information.  I highly recommend it.

    Sherri 

  • MarieK
    MarieK Member Posts: 467

    It's nice to have a thread for 2009 - Sisters.  It's good to read about how everyone is doing at different stages of their treatments and recovery.

    PauldingMom I hear you on the aches and pains and suffering. 

    When people ask me how I'm doing I always say "fine" out of habit but really I'm just getting used to being sick/suffering.

    I have sore & swollen glands popping up all the time (so far I have avoided getting any colds/flu this winter), sore ribs (probably from wearing a bra again!), sore lower back (sleeping uncomfortably), weird aches and pains at my surgical site (nerves regenerating), sore jaw (stress/nerves is causing me to clench when I sleep), my eyes are still dry and hard to focus (souveneir from chemo), and headaches (different ones not all in the same place) - all since I last finished chemo 5 weeks ago.

    On top of all that I have several hot flashes a day and I've gained 20lbs!

    Wow when I put it all down like that - that's a long list of complaints!

    I'm not one to complain usually and before BC I very rarely took any kind of pain med but the aches and pains have me taking Tylenol several days a week.  I've got Naproxen but I don't really want to take that because of the side effects.

    My hands and feet are very cold too but they were like that before I had BC - low blood pressure and poor circulation - sometimes the hot flashes are welcome as I feel warm and cosy all over afterwards! 

    The weather is kind of cool-ish here in Vancouver right now and luckily our summers are not too hot so I think I'll be ok handling the hot flashes going forward!  So far I haven't had to "flip" my wig in public!

    Well I'll stop complaining now...

    I know others have it way worse than me and I'm grateful that I don't have to take additional medication and can carry on with my life!

    I'll check in with you all later!

    Marie

  • pj12
    pj12 Member Posts: 18,108

    Nice to meet all you young (!) women but sad to see you here. I hope you find some support from us... we surely do need each other.

    Wow, Marie, you are in the middle of all the excitement right now. Vancouver looks beautiful on TV. After the USA :) I am rooting for Canada and so glad to see both of us making a good showing. BTW, complain all you want... we are here to listen and sympathize.

    Pauldingmom... I can only say, my thermostat is broken too. My body cannot seem to compensate for the littlest bit of cold. I shake like a leaf! Fortunately I live in Florida! If I sleep on my operated side my hand is ice cold in the AM. Don't know why.

    Wanda... you have been through so much already. Rads should be a breeze, I hope. I found them stressful but I did not have chemo so maybe I don't know what stress is? Things did not go like clockwork, there were lots of delays, it was freezing in the radiation room ALWAYS,  the skin irritation was expected and tolerable but unpleasant, I still (8 months out) have some swelling so the treated side is not smaller, is actually a little bigger still, the predicted fatigue was less than expected but has lingered - I remain not as strong Rads? or Arimidex? I don't know. But if it keeps BC from coming back it is worth it!

    JoJo... praying your daughter will be a false alarm. It would be too much to bear for her to have to deal with this awful disease. 

    Thinking of everyone!!!

    pam 

  • joanneasiata
    joanneasiata Member Posts: 305

    WANDA AND PAULDINGMOM

    A very big WELCOME

    This is a good place to be for a bad place to be if that makes any sense at all .

    Here here on the after marks of chemo and surgery, heres my list.

    Mouth still soo darn dry it like my saliva glands are all broken.

    Achy hips and back and legs id put that down to the extra 5 kgs

    The only words that come from my lips is    im tired , im tired im tired ,and oh oh oh oh when i try and get up .

     And the painful look on my face every time i do a poo.

    The feeling like im coming down with the flue is constantly there .

    and the worry of it all coming back ,haunts my daily and now my girls.

    Oh well life goes on and really we are sooo glad for that , well have to go and get ready to support my daughter through the squashy momo machine and the lubi ultra sound and its not going to  be fun as she is such a drama queen ,very high maintnance kinda girl ,well ill let you all know later how it went ,after the tests ill be down the beach for a swim and try and relax in the sun

    seeya later

    JOJO

  • dsgirl
    dsgirl Member Posts: 193

    Well, Hi there again Pauldingmom, was wondering where all the October Rad ladies went, I guess we will meet here again and join if we may the Class of 2009, seems hard to stay away from this site, since we all are having continious issues of some kind or other and it sure helps to read you are not alone in this.  I also have very cold hands, however it has been attributed to low thyroid function, but even now that medication for that shows it to be normal again, I still suffer with cold hands and sometimes feet and nose as well.

    I am due to have my first mammogram since surgery, not looking forward to the mammo, but of course hoping to get the results to read no evidence of disease.  I see the surgeon on the same day and will be able to bring the mammo results with me, so no waiting this time, which is good.

    Hope everyone has a great day,

    dsgirl

  • Psalm121
    Psalm121 Member Posts: 179

    Hello Ladies,

    My heart goes out to each and every one of you, so much so because we are all living the same realities.  Some with different aspects of treatment, yes, but the cold, fearful reality of what has happened to us, the fearful reality of what COULD happen to us, and definitely the fearful reality of the same nightmare happening to our loved ones. 

    I try so hard to be, dare I say it, positive.  I am beginning to hate that word.  I find myself dwelling on 2009---the beginnings of my journey and everything that has gone on along the way.  I am thankful and scared as hell at the same time.  When someone asks me how I'm doing, I never tell them the truth...they don't want to hear it anyway.  They want me to say "I'm fine, doing good", etc and not have to hear about all the nasty physical/emotional/mental things breast cancer and treatments do to me.  I keep all this in my head, but I tear up sometimes when I have just held back in telling them exactly how I feel and realize they don't know it or care anyway.  The same people who have been so supportive and encouraging are now expecting me to just get over it and be my same old self again.  I will never be the same again...I have been deeply affected, to the very core of my soul.  I feel the pain of it all in the center of my chest and ache with the loss.  When I read your posts, I am both comforted and saddened at the same time.  I am tired and need to exercise to lose the weight I've gained.  I am thankful to be alive and see my loved ones but then I am grouchy with them.  I love being back at work but find myself being impatient and anxious in hectic situations. I can't decide if I want to be left alone or throw myself into every activity possible. 

  • echosalvaje
    echosalvaje Member Posts: 73

    OK, went in for my 6 month post chemo labs etc. My ONC said my levels are good. The last time we met I wanted my port removed but he said, "no, you are stage 3 after all."  I was devastated. I asked him if he didn't have confidence in the treatment regimen that he prescribed and he told me that with all the every three month blood draws and such it would be easier on me to keep the port for a couple of years. A COUPLE OF YEARS?????

    Oddly, this time when I went in, I asked again about port removal. He didn't even bat an eye. Just said, "sure, whenever you want it out we can do that." WTF??? So....I'm getting it out!

  • pj12
    pj12 Member Posts: 18,108

    Dear Psalm121,

    You have said so  eloquently what we all feel. This disease isolates us from our friends and family in such a sad way. It's just no one else can understand what we are going through emotionally. Thank heavens we have our sisters here who never turn a deaf ear to our pain. So glad you have found us.

    pam 

  • Lilah
    Lilah Member Posts: 2,631

    Echo -- you wore him down :)  And you had some good blood tests!  The combo worked.  Yay for getting it out.  Here's hoping you never need it again.

    Lilah

  • pj12
    pj12 Member Posts: 18,108

    Yah Echo! A couple years indeed! So glad you prevailed.

    pam 

  • Psalm121
    Psalm121 Member Posts: 179

    Dear Pam,

    Thanking God for all of you right now and always praying for comfort, peace and strength for us as we continue doing all that we must.  I have been turning to BCO since April 09 when I first had my symptoms.  Tonite I am tired from a long day at work, learning both a co-worker and patient in the clinic I work in now have bc has brought all this sharply to the surface and overwhelmed me with emotions.  When it is appropriate, I will definitely recommend this website to these dear ladies and pray that they will be able to lean on sisters who unconditionally love and understand.  Thanks for all you do, Pam and everyone....there are so many of us who silently dwell here.  We may not "speak" often, but our questions and concerns are always handled with TLC.

  • echosalvaje
    echosalvaje Member Posts: 73

    Thanks Ladies, I do have to say he did manage to weedle some doubt into my already fragile mind, but I suppose if I need to do this again, they can put the darn thing back in, right? I can't get in to the surgeon until the end of March to have it done, but it really will be a relief. No more pillow across my chest for the seatbelt. No more rubbing from the seam of tank tops. And I'll be able to lay on my left side again.....ah, it is the little things isn't it? ;)

  • joanneasiata
    joanneasiata Member Posts: 305

    PSALM 121

    I would love you to post more often i love reading what your thoughts are, you really speak from your heart and what you wrote in your second last post was so spot on to i think how we all feel ,well put

    Well we got through the tests and they said that they couldn't seem to find anything but you can really feel it, its the size of your palm of your hand  so if the end result come back neg do you think we should be happy with that or have more tests done ??? but boy i was just so darn happy with that  what a relief ,thanks for the prayers and all the good vibes .

    JOJO

  • txstardust
    txstardust Member Posts: 180

    Oh, thank goodness Jojo, I'm glad that things seem to be going your way!  Let's hope the final results of the testing are just as good.  

    Psalm121, I loved what you have to say.  Your thoughts echo mine to a large extent.  I just had a big argument with DH, because he says I don't tell him how I feel - yet when I do, it just upsets him and he gets frustrated with me, so why should I get into all of it when he truly doesn't want to know deep down inside?  I'm having a really difficult time of late, and I don't know who else I can share it with except my sisters here, thank God for all of you!

    I hope everyone has a great day!

    Peace,

    Shelby 

  • JustmeAlicia
    JustmeAlicia Member Posts: 629

    WANDA AND PAULDINGMOM - so sorry you are here, but WELCOME to this great site.

    I can so relate to what so many of you are complaining about ~ they could be my exact words. (marie and jojo)

    Echo ~ glad you got the dr to let you remove your port.  I am sure that will make you feel a bit better. 

    Psalm ~ nice to hear from you !  Hang in there.

    Good day to all,

    Alicia

  • pj12
    pj12 Member Posts: 18,108

    Alicia,

    How is your husband? Thinking about both of you.

    pam 

  • JustmeAlicia
    JustmeAlicia Member Posts: 629

    Thanks Pam, he had a colonoscopy on Tuesday they removed a polyp.  We are waiting for results, Dr. didn't think it was anything.  Nothing coming up that would cause his elevated platelet levels.  Onto more testing I guess.........  grrrrrrrr ~

  • jburke1
    jburke1 Member Posts: 258

    psalm121-Love your name on here by the way :) You speak for all of us, and the silent fear and pain we all have to endure. You are so right that when people ask how we are, they do not want the truth or the real answer, they want the short abbreviated lie that we have to convince ourselves of as well. No one wants me to go on an on about my arm and how much it hurts, and no one wants to know the fear I always have in the back of my mind that I could have a nasty recurrence. Thank God for all of you on here that we can confide in and UNDERSTAND eachother!

    JoJo- Glad the results came back negative. I know the fear is still there they they may have missed something. Have you asked your doc what more he could do to figure out why they lump is there and what it may be? Doesn't hurt to ask all the questions you can! Hang in there :)

    Echo-So happy for you that you will be getting your port out! Your right it is all the little things that make a huge difference. It is hard when you can't just sleep on whatever side you want, or if you have to constantly have a shirt rubbing the wrong way. Hang in there, just a few more weeks instead of a couple years! :)

    To everyone else, hope you are all having a great day. I will be celebrating my 36th birthday on Sunday. I am not sure how I feel about that. It is my first b-day since my DX. Did any of you who have had a b-day since DX find it hard to be in a celebratory mood? I should be happy and excited that I am here and doing well, but I can't get rid of the small amount of depression that I have. I will go out to dinner with my DH and some friends and have some drinks. I am sure I will have a great time. Thank you again for all of you. You are all wonderful special women!

    Hugs

    Jen

  • don23
    don23 Member Posts: 213
    Jen - I  just celebrated my 52nd birthday this month. I now look at birthdays in a whole different light. I used to dread birthdays. This past birthday I told myself it's not about age anymore but about being here to celebrate another year! Went out to dinner with family and had a good day and boy did we celebrate! Happy Birthday a few days early and enjoy the day!