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MC Welcome.
So many decisions and it can be so hard to know, I am sure especially with all that is coming at you right now.
Try thinking of where you are now as information gathering. The decision itself will only take an instant. All the rest of the bit beforehand is information gathering.
I had to decide between 2 oncologists, both available to me at my hospital. Breast surgeon ready to wrIte me a referral to either. In information gathering I got a lot of hearsay that one wass really nice, great bedside manner and patients love him. I heard the other was often abrupt, might possibly be on the autistic spectrum, had been known to offend patients and was also the top guy in his field in Ireland, and renowned internationally. I really wanted to go with Mr. Nice Guy. Everything I heard about the other scared me. I kept asking people for their experiences, trying to confirm a decision to go with Mr. Nice Guy. Of course time frame for decision also v short. As is. In the end I realised I would be pretty stupid to pass up the top guy in the field simply because others had found him abrupt. My life more important than his bedside manner. Went with him and have never yet encountered a scary moment with him, even had a moment of compassion when a friend died from BC. If I had not heard all that stuff I would never have had any reason to doubt the wisdom of going with him. Now I am not saying Mr Nice Guy would not have also worked out fine, i am sure he would, but why would I have passed up the option of having the best? Looking back now it was a no-brainer, but of course it did not feel like that right away.
Sadly that disruption you have experienced is part of the cancer package. However disruption, although so unwelcome and difficult to manage, can sometimes produce new ways of thinking about your life, new friends, new ways of accepting help that you have not needed before perhaps, and not all that comes about because of it may be bad. I truly hope you will find something good amid this terribly unwelcome visitor.
Re Prayer about decision making, I can only tell you that for me the "go to" is the Holy Spirit, a part of God who is available to all of us, as we are all one through the Spirit of God, which is within and all around us. If you feel able, I would suggest - ask the Holy Spirit to help you with making the best decision. And very best wishes. You will make a good decision. You sound like you have some good friends who are loving you as you arrive at a decision that you can live with. (Edited for typo)
XXX
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what a beautiful post FF.
MC
Arming yourself with info. Is never a waste of time. I find the answers come when given a quiet space, shutting down the internal chatter, a few heartfelt prayers and inner listening. Sometimes an image or a few words come to you or just a 'knowing'. A feeling that "all shall be well and all manner of things shall be well" Julian of Norwich.
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Thank you, feelingfeline. I prayed the Rosary on the way there. I think my BS is also on the spectrum. When I got home I called my daughter and my usual ride to Friday Mass. Then sent e-mail to book club members and relatives.
Surgery is on the 16th. I will have several weeks to get back to routine and get used to the idea. My sister is having knee replacement on the 14th.
Time now to check fitbit and see how badly I slept last night, do the readings and pray the Rosary.
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Please pray for Deb and her family, members of my parish. She died this morning after fighting breast cancer for quite a few years.
A friend came up to me after Mass this morning, seeking assurance of a good prognosis for me.
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Praying comfort for those who loved her.
She is gone no further from us than into His arms. May she be happy forever with Him.
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Astrid and Feeling Feline, both of your stories are so moving and powerful! And to think they'll be here for years to come to provide others with encouragement. I wonder if the book is available on Amazon, etc... I'll look for it. If I ever wrote a book about the Saints' intercession, I'd want to include the one you shared, FF!
I'm often amazed at how the Lord works, giving us what we need, when we need it. He is a good, good father who knows how to give his children good gifts. A handful of months before I discovered a lump in my breast, I attended a healing Mass during our parish's Lenten mission. I was healed (I'd discover days later) of emotional distress that I had carried most of my life. More than two years later, I am still no longer plagued by the negative dialogue that played non-stop in my head. In retrospect, interestingly, I undoubtedly had BC at that time, but God didn't choose to heal me of cancer. No, he chose to heal my mind. That only dawned on me in the past year...the fact that He could have healed me of anything (or nothing at all) but He chose what I would have considered least important. Today, it gives me comfort because I believe He must have a reason for not removing my cancer and I trust that He knows what is best and will use it for His glory.0 -
Late this afternoon, we have Adoration, Mass, and our monthly litany to St. Peregrine. I am a regular at that Mass, and am on the schedule as lector. Msgr. is concerned that I won't come forward for prayer. But If I don't, I won't get people praying for me specifically. And I am afraid of going through recovery and the emotional process without community support. I guess I have no choice.
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McBaker,
Deciding to let others know about one's cancer is always hard. No one wants to be pitied or whispered about. But, you're right about community support. I wouldn't have made it through my chemo, surgery, radiation, and targeted therapy without my friends and colleagues. I pray that you find the courage to step forward and receive God's grace.
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brilliant!
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Wish there was a "like" button :-D
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(attempted like button)0 -
nice one. (Like!)
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That's great!! Love the 'Like' and the Jesus 'Hug' buttons!
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I had my excision on Thursday. I had more or less come to the stage of being very calm about it. Praying the Rosary relaxed me a lot. My surgeon was a bit late for the procedure, so they had me lying in an anaesthetic bay, waiting for her to come and see me before they gave me any drugs and moved me into theatre. I was alone for a bit and just found myself spontaneously praying. I remember saying the Jesus Prayer out loud, and saying God's will be done. Maybe it was my own little Gethsemane.
I am doing very well, really. Of course there is pain and discomfort, but that is simply part of the experience. My sisters have been so wonderful and a great help. I find myself praying a lot for people who have been diagnosed with breast cancer...in some ways, I can understand a bit of the anxiety they face. God bless you all!
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I will be praying all week for my doctors, dedicating one decade a day.
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Sparrowhawk so glad to hear that that is behind you. Best wishes with your healing and recovery.
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Thank you so much! Prayer is so appreciated and is coming your way, too. I am back to the surgeon on Friday to have my dressing removed and to hear how everything went from her perspective. I didn't see her at all after the surgery, but recovery nurses said all was good. I remember I was so out of it that when I woke up I asked them if it was over!
God is so good to me and is leading me on the way of trust and love. He is always with me. I am so grateful for that.
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Happy to hear that your surgery went well, sparrowhawk. Here's praying that the surgeon has good news for you.
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Hi sparrowhawk,
I am praying for you that all goes well on Friday.
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Thank you both. The surgery called me again today to see if I was alright. I still have strong pain...maybe this is normal, but it's all in the hands of the Lord. I was reading Pope Francis' exhortation Gaudete et Exsultate earlier, and was touched by a point where he says that God speaks a word through our lives, a message of Jesus He wants to share with the world. I really want to reflect more on this.
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Will check out that encyclical. There is so much in papal encyclicals that regrettably few people have read.
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MCBaker that is so so true.
I only read Laudato Si' after attending World Meeting of Families in Dublin, where I really became aware that it was something I really must read.
When I read it I wanted to go out in the street and start grabbing people and saying "Have you read Ladato Si?"
Instead what I did was I designed some T-shirts and Bags that said Ladato Si' on them and got them printed. Now whenever someone asks me what that means I have a chance to tell them...and sometimes I get asked if the person can get one of the tee shirts or Bags! (I do not charge any profit, only the cost of producing the item as the point is to spread Pope Francis important message, not make a profit). But 99 times out of a 100 the other person, a Catholic, knows nothing about the Apostolic Exhortation. Think we need a better job at the Parish Level of connecting to Rome and therefore to the Church globally. Not that I ma blaming overworked PP's, think this initiative will have to come from us ourselves.
BTW Laudato Si' is MINDBLOWING.
XXX
This is one of the designs. Bonus is I really like wearing and using my own stuff too!
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BTW I found following Vatican News on Facebook to be terrific. I really started to get an idea of how much good stuff was happening that we do not know is going on. You get Pope Francis weekly audience, his homilies, plus major news events like the recent Synod on Youth - would never have known about this from any other source. It is great to have a positive news feed!
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I remember how frustrating it was to be laid up with a rotator cuff injury to my right shoulder. This time, with enough spiritual readings to take all morning every morning, the frustration will be much less. Thank you.
Not only that, but when individual members of the Church connect with wisdom from Rome, we can more easily see the negative pressures within the cultures in which we live.
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Gaudete et Exsultate (Rejoice and Be Glad: On Holiness in Today's World) is beautiful. I am only at the beginning and am trying to read it slowly and thoughtfully. Sometimes all you need to read is one line and it says more to you than a whole paragraph.
Actually, my mother told me she was attending a weekly discussion group in her parish on the encyclical, which I thought was amazing - never heard of anything like that before.
Feelingfeline, your shirt and bag design is so cool and such a smart way of getting people interested! Really great!
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