Calling all TNs
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So, a question for all you "old timers". I have one more treatment, then I'm done. What happens next? Are we TNs just pushed out the door and told "hope we don't see you again"? Are there scans or anything or just 3 or 6 months mammo on good breast? I feel really weird. I know this has been probably been discussed on this thread before, but would appreciate your personal stories. My insurance denied my PET scan right from the start and my onc told me I would not get one unless there was reason to believe there was a problem-how scary is that!
Tiffany
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Tiffany- read my post above. There are pros and cons to "routine" 3 month follow-ups and more pro-active ones. You have to find your comfort level, and be prepared for it to change, as mine did.0
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Heidi-thank you. Somehow i missed the entire last page of posts before i posted my questions. I think I need to pay more attention!!! I'll just chalk it up to chemo brain!!
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Tiffany
That is my fear too! I two more treatments to go and I am scared out of my mind after treatment ends. Oh well, I'll just keep pressing forward.
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Oh Tifj and Fighter..it IS scary to walk out of your treatment center after that last treatment... You know you should be excited because your are done but scared because ..well..no more infusions..and you wonder how long this treatment will last and will it work? We have all been through this..
But....don't think they are going to let you off the hook.you will be seeing your onc every 3 months for at least 3 years. your BS every 6 months for at least 2 or 3 years..plus throw a few mammograms in there..plus alot of breast exams...
At first I was very nervous going to these first few appts...now I'm not really nervous at all.
Still get a little nervous about the mammogram though....
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OK, here is the external link that I have created to my on-line photo site. A few heads up:
* There is a LOT of stuff in here (almost 45 minutes if you do the slide show). If you don't have high speed Internet you will probably not be able to view it.
* I have included photos and videos. Each video is preceded by several photos of the houses in it. I did this because the low light required to feel the ambiance of the houses also creates graininess in the video. This is a hand held tiny Flip video so I apologize in advance for its quality. It does great outdoors in natural lighting but, under these conditions, there's no room for exposure compensation. Plus, it is being filmed by a near-sighted old nag whose (if you listen closely) knees can be heard creaking on occasion as she muddles her way around the village in a vain attempt at preventing you from becoming seasick while watching.
* Depending on how much time you have (or how bored you want to get), you have the option of either doing the slide show (45 minutes) or just clicking on the group of houses that interests you (a minute here, a minute there, etc.).
Oh yeah, I spelled "Edition" wrong ...
One more thing- no need to clog this thread with responses. If you enjoy it just PM me a smiley face or something. (I prefer
to 
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Titan- thank you. I guess the fear of the future is beginning to take over the joy of finishing treatment. I don't want to be afraid all the time. I suppose my best option is live life to the fullest and not give myself too much time to dwell on the negative. Having 2 young children, I guess that won't be too hard!! Also, knowing all of you wonderful ladies are here for support during those negative times is comforting! I feel better already!
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ok, a change in attitude is called for here!!!! Please let's celebrate the ending of nasty chemo, terminating hurtful rads and finishing surgery(ies) on our precious ta-tas!! After nine months of hell, I've had my last visit to my onc, had my last post-op with ps today and I can't distance myself fast enough from this mess. In my mind, ITS OVER. I was not fighting cancer in February of last year, and at this time, I'm not fighting it any more. ITS OVER. If something comes up that causes alarm, I'll check into it as well as having the 3 month blood tests for any indications of abnormalities. But I'm not putting one more ounce of energy into worry or what-ifs. I hope this doesn't sound too harsh, but I want to lovingly bump you on to letting go of this new habit of worry, anxiety and fear. Yes it was the most terrifying event of my 57 years, but I keep telling myself, its over, its over, its over~ I have my bad days, but like Heidi, I say F*** cancer and as of today, I am adopting a new mindset of joy and thankfulness and will now be looking around the corner with optomism and hope.0
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Ruth - Well said! May I borrow your attitude???!!!
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CC4NPG: I just read your post around Dec 10, when you ended up in the hospital. i am shocked that when you called the Onc office, no one immediately called you back. i did Chemo last February-May, Had similar experience, fever after 5 days chemo, called my Dr office and they immediately told me to calmly pack a bag and get to the nearest hospital emergency room and tell them my Dr office suspects Neutropenia. ( I lived one hour from my Dr office and hospital) I did this and the hospital emergency room acted very, very fast and also put me in a secluded room so I would not be around people. both places took this very seriously. Mine was 4.. Sorry to hear you had a bad time of it...
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Hello Ladies. I am 3/4 of the way through my radiation, and feeling great. Sometimes my breast hurts a little, but so what. The arthritis and pains in my knees and neck and shoulders are dissapating. Generally I have more energy than I've had in a year! For about 6 months or a year prior to my BC diagnosis I had been feeling unusually tired, and just thought I was getting old. Now my old energy is returning. I know I may feel fatique from the rads any day now, but so far so good. I hope this continues.
Also, see how my hair has grown. Its still baby fine and no sign of curls. I keep hoping for the curls.
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MBJ: Thanks for the good wishes. I am getting less nervous about the visits, but the apprehension begins to sneak in a little as I get closer. Just hate even going into that cancer center - ugh! 80 degress! I am jealous!
Heidi: I agree - I think you should keep going to the same place for your all your mammos. I still go back to my BS for them, but they have a dedicated center where they do nothing but breast cancer related tests, etc., so I always have one of the three female radiologists reading all my testing, and then my BS goes over it with me. There are 4 female BS and three female radiologists that opened this practice, after leaving the practice groups they were in previously, about 9 years ago and you get your mammo and US results immediately which is great, and the same eyes are always looking at everything. It's not open to just any woman wanting to go there, you have to be a breast cancer gal or at high risk. I am fortunate to have them. And since I'm on this thread, I want to just say - the slide show was amazing. So very beautiful - thanks for sharing it with us.
And sending hugs and all good wishes to everyone else on this thread.
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I LOVE the Princess Bride......."Hello my name is Indigo, you killed my father, prepare to die". My oldest daughter watched the movie so much she knew it word for word when she was young.
Ruth - Congrats on finishing treatment!!!
Heidi - thanks for sharing the pictures and videos - beautiful!!!
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Mitymuffin - you look adorable!!! Love the new pic. I too wished for curls - never got them - same old baby fine hair with not even a wave.
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mitymuffin- I had to take a second look! Hair! Congrats!
I had a grizzled look and soft curls on top when my hair grew back but, alas, it is mostly brown again (hubby keeps telling me I still have the silver-back look on top) but the curls are definitely gone--- damn. I really liked them. Now I just have this boy cut look that everyone thinks is cute, but I miss my curls. With styling gel I can coax a few waves out of it, but not much more.
tnbcRuth- I agree--- on with life. I think I can finally chart my next course now that I've sailed around all the minefields that were in my way.
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Mitymuffin - hair is coming in nicely...yay you!!
Ruth - I love your attitude. I'm going to try to follow your approach myself.
Heidi - I agree with Linda about having mammos at the same location every time. That's what my onc. recommded to me. BTW, the village is lovely. My DD and I just watched the slideshow together.
kelben - where in Ontario are you? I'm in Mississauga.
As usual, there's too much activity on this thread to respond to every topic. Wow, what a busy bunch we are...
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Princess Bride - Miracle Max to Inigo refering to Wesley:
"He's only sort of dead"
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Only sort of dead--best movie ever and I never tire of watching it.
Heidi: When I get a good chunk of time I am going to sit and watch the whole slide show-Thank you for sharing. I say, just see the onc and still get the blood tests. I also am constantly feeling myself up and then I have my DH do it to be sure, LOL.
Ruth: Good for you-we could all share your energy.
Mittymuffin: I didn't recognize you! You look fantastic. BTW: I would gladly give you my curls if I could
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You guys are great talking about movies! I just wish I could sit down long enough to watch one! The last time I went to the theater was with my daughter and we saw PS I love you..I cried through the whole thing..the next day I looked up the actor on the internet (forget his name)..man is he HOT!
Oh..and Mitty..you look absolutely beautiful!
And Ruth..I agree with you totally...but remember that mindset does take some time...I think it kind of just happens....it seemed for months I freaked about everything.
The ordeal with breast cancer was so emotional and time consuming...it takes awhile to get yourself back to not thinking about it so much anymore..and it does happen...the only thing I keep track of now is how many months I'm out (22 on the 20th). I keep my appts. on Outlook at work...and when they "pop up" I go..otherwise I don't think about it.
Oh yeah..and come on here..but I don't think of being on here as clinging to the time I went through this ordeal...I think of it as meeting new friends and talking and maybe helping a little if I can....and you ladies help me too...
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I'm not going anywhere~ I want to stay here and give support as much as I can. Sometimes that change in mindset needs a little push
MityMuffin-love the new pic. If ever I get past the buzz cut stage, I'll post a new pic too, sans the wig!
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Hi Ladies!
MityMuffin, CONGRATS on the beautiful new hair! You look fabulous. Glad to hear energy is returning as well!
My surgery is Monday. I'm starting to get worked up (not necessarily about the surgery, but more about the results). But I'm repeating the mantra, "you get what you get". Me worrying about isn't going to make me node negative, right? It is what it is.
Oh-and on the Princess Bride~ YAY love that movie so much!!! I may have to fire that up to watch this weekend!
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Am I the only person who doesn't know this movie?
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Princess Bride is a charmingly hilarious story of love and lunacy set to a swashbuckling theme. An Anniversary Addition came out recently so should be easy to locate.
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mittymuffin - thanks for your positive post. always nice to know how one is feeling after the chemo and rad. Your hair looks great. You must have had a lumpectomy since now you are having rads. I was feeling the same way as you, before the BC diagnosis, I used to feel really bad, like I was going limp, even had a neuropathy testing done. They couldn't find a single thing wrong with me, all my blood tests were perfectly in the normal range. In retrospect, now I am thinking that cancer does feel in your body when you are closely atuned to it. I was feeling it. However, in my case, I did not have any positive lymph nodes, so am wondering why I was feeling it, if it had not reached my blood yet. Anyway, I just wanted to thank you for your post. I am almost there, my last chemo and then onto rads..... maybe ..... or maybe take them both out. I am double minded, scared to keep them.
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Lovelyface: I just sent you a PM. I notice we have similar diagnosis. I only had one breast removed, however, I am very proactive with doing alternative things to help prevent another recurrence and for it to never progress in my remaining breast. I only had suspicious changes but no detectable BC in my remaining breast. I also decided to not return to my former job which was huge with overwhelming stress. I intend to never have this again but not everyone believes what I believe or wants to make the huge changes I have made. Best of luck to you in whatever you decide, as it is a very personal decision, to be sure. Only you know what is best for your body. Hugs.
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MBJ - thanks so much for the PM, which I will try to follow through. Yes, we do seem to have similar diagnosis. I had the lumpectomy done with 3 cm clear margin and supposed to do rads once the chemo finishes. I am doing dose dense chemo AC and Taxol, the last one being on 12/28. I am overwhelmed by what I read about my right breast. They did a biopsy of one enhancement (on MRI), and found that I am "residual focul atypical ductal hyperplasia" remaining there. My surgeon was something else, other women who have worked with her think she is crazy. I was under the knife with her twice. Her surgery caused me an infection due to her negligence. She never told me anything about my cancer, where it was, what she did. My office visits with her included her telling me funny stories about stupid things. She never took anything seriously. I am not even sure if she took the right stuff out and gave to pathologist. Imagine my doubts and this is what I have to live with. You see, I had this one tumor, then another DCIS close to it, and then some satelite nodules a little further away, etc. etc. when I read my reports, I am not sure if she took all of those things out or not. Not sure who to ask. I tried to ask my Medical Oncologist, and he has no answers. I think he only knows about drugs and chemo. Well, I am thinking if I am going to consider taking my right breast out, then why should I leave the one with the cancer. The tumor board recommends preserving both breasts, although I am regarded as high risk for the right breast. I am writing a letter to another surgeon asking him if he could possibly remove the atypia out of my right breast, if that is possible, if insurance will approve. I guess they don't recommend surgical intervention for that finding. I find that once again, men are not taking care of women like they should be taken care of. We are too many, and we have too many different body parts, why won't we, we are the mothers of the world, who give birth to them, right? I had experienced this when I had fibroids. I had found out that the radiologist was too lazy to count how many fibroids I had, he would give a general description in the reports, whereas I wanted to know exactly how many did I have. I see the same thing happening in the breast world. MBJ - how do you feel with your new breasts? Would you say you feel much much better that you had this done, peace of mind? does it feel like before. Would you recommend a mastectomy for a woman like me who has so many issues and a doubtful mind. Are you still loving your body the same way as before? Please tell me how you feel. Thanks so much for your help. Oh by the way what does 0/2 nodes mean? 2 nodes positive? I think mine is IIA. I will go to that website you mentioned in the PB to check out alternative things I can do. I have also been feeling guilty lately, during chemo, drinking coffee with sugar, two times a day and not exercising. Maybe my tumor is already growing. I hate this disease, it has taken everything from me, so far. But I won't let it take anything more from me, no way.
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Hi All!
I'm new here, so please bear with me. Lump was found on mammogram. I had a core biopsy on 11/23/10, on 11/24/10 I had an appt with my surgeon and on 12/2/10 had lumpectomy to get that sucker out of me! Surgeon knew I wanted it out "yesterday!" I was told that I was a tn when they got the pathology report back on the lump/tumor. No sign of cancer in my lymph nodes.
I have an appt with a med onc on 12/20/10...from what I've read, I am assuming that the normal route will be chemo/rad? I did have a spacer for rad until they found out I was a tn.
What can I expect from the med onc on Monday?
What are all the abbreviations? Is there a glossary for these?Thanks in advance for letting me vent!
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Mommafluff61: Welcome, sorry about what you are going through. Most TN's have chemo, then rads, and your onc will probably discuss with you on Monday what type of chemotherapy she recommends you have. What abbreviations are you asking about?
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