August 2010...anyone starting chemo besides me?!
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Just a quick update- Saw the DR yesterday, my echo is saying my heart is at 60% which he said was good LOL i figured it would have been bad news but i guess to the medical community having more than 1/2 is great news.
Secondly I AM NO LONGER DOING CHEMO!!!!! just like i figured with the nuropathy the dr was gonna prob cut the 8th tx and he did! I still go in for the herceptin though....
He said "figngers crossed that the side effects reverse" that wasnt very reassuring! But hey i'll take it!
Be back later tonight- got some errands to run
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Congrats on the good news Texas!!!
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Lizzy: I'm so glad you are home and I'm sure Bibbers is as happy as you are to have you back.
Cal: I will say many prayers for you. Keep us posted.
JSW: I'm sorry to hear about the hair. L
Texas: Yay for no more chemo!
I'll explain a little about why I have this feeling that maybe they didn't get all the cancer. I feel like the chemo did its job. I feel good about that. But with my bmx, they did not get clean margins, hence the 25 days of radiation. They only radiated an oval shape and not the whole breast. I can remember where the tumor was. I can put my finger there and it was within the oval shape that was radiated. But after I was done, I started to think. My RO held up an image of my MRI when he marked me. But with my surgery, with the nipple removed and the skin stretched to sew it up, and then the TE in there and all the fills, I am not confident that the spot was hit with radiation. Who knows where that spot ended up after surgery and fills. I won't go into the details about why they did not radiate the whole breast - I'm not even sure I completely understand why, but I do remember the RO saying he prefers to do the whole breast. I will ask him about this when I see him next, but I have a feeling he is going to tell me that he is not certain we got the spot either. And according to my onc, there is reduced blood flow to the area after a mx so they cannot count on chemo getting anything that may have been left behind after surgery.
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Texas, good news about your heart.
With the neuropathy be sure you wear shoes all the time to protect yourself. You can't feel what you can'tt feel. That has been the cause of the last two times I fell over. I am not ordinarily that much of a clutz.My neuropathy isn't reversing yet but I am hopeful it will eventually.
Ann I am sorry you have to feel any concern. Ask your Doc to explain what steps can be taken given the circumstances you describe. Can the target a wider area? Do an oval donut around the last area.
I meet my radiologist today and am a little bit nervous.
Calamity I am praying for you.
Peace out
Ginger
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I just can't understand why I am so weepy now that chemo is over. I am also much more nauseous but I have a cold/flu bug so that could be the cause. Lizzy i am glad you are home and on the mend. Calam I hope for the best news for you. Texas -great news. Ginger - good luck with rads. I hope I can get cleared for surger on the 11th tomorrow. I started feeling the cold/flu on Friday so hopefully i'll be recovered by this friday.
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Calamty - Thinking about you today and hoping all goes well with the Dr.
jsw - I was off raw foods while I was on chemo and I started eating salads again about 3 weeks after my last chemo. I haven't had any problems.
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JSW--I ate salads during chemo infact my MO encouraged me to eat dark greens to keep RBC good as I did not do Neulasta. I can't remember if they told me that in chemo education--if they did, I didn't remember.
Ann-Sorry about your worry, it is hard not to worry that they may not have "got" everything. I worry about it also sometimes but have to think that the doc's know what they are doing. When you see your RO again, ask them to explain--I'm sure they will. I am having 25 + 5 radiation starting next week. My RO is radiating whole breast along with axillary as I just had lumpectomy.
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Just got back from the doctor. Don'tcha know I get there and I can't find the freakin' lump!!? She felt, I felt, I dug down in my collarbone - could not find it! I found it in the waiting room and I can find it now but not there! She checked me with my shirt off, looked for any assymetry and felt my neck and all around. She said everything looks fine.
But she said "I believe you that it was there" and gave me a prescription for an ultrasound. I couldn't go today - had to get home for the kids, so I'm going to call tomorrow and see what they can do for me. I assume she'll get the results pretty quick.She said that a node that could be felt would have been picked up on my CT scan back in August since I had a chest scan done, specifically. She also said that she had never seen a grade 2 cancer grow someplace else or grow, while on aggressive chemo..... And she got my marker bloodwork back and that is totally perfect.
So while I'm still a bit nervous....I'm feeling a lot better than I was before!
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Cal - Good news, whew! Sounds like everything is being considered correctly.
Ann - Follow your instincts.
Texas - My echo said 55-60% this time, first one post-chemo, and that was considered good. My first one before chemo was 73% but the onc nurse said the new values were fine. Hope so! Had herceptin only today.
JSW - I did not avoid any raw foods during chemo, I had neulasta each cycle and was told I could eat whatever worked, so I did.
Zenith - Hug to you.
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Cal: I had a swollen node in my neck when I had my infection back in October. They scanned it to make sure it was just a swollen node from infection and not a blood clot. It turned out fine and went away when my infection cleared up. Hopefully, yours will be the same. Nodes are supposed to swell to catch infection. Can you explaiin more what your doctor meant by she hadn't seen a Grade 2 cancer grow someplace else? Is she saying Grade 2 doesn't have as much risk of mestatisis? If so, I haven't heard that before.
Lizzy, glad you are home.
Congrats Texas.
I'm tired and achy again today. I see my onc next Monday so I'll be chewing his ear off about why the crappy SEs now a month after chemo??? Does exercise help the aches or make them worse? I walked some today but can't tell that it did much good.
OK, I'm dragging my whiney butt off here to go fix supper. Have a nice evening ladies.
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Lady - no, what she meant was that since I had scans in August and they were clean and i started chemo in august, the chance that a brand new tumor had grown in a LN in those 16 weeks that I was on chemo were slim to none. Yes, grade 2 can definitely produce mets elsewhere.
That's why they monitor us so closely. What she was saying is that the chance of a recurrence that fast of a grade 2 (since they are slow growing) while on chemo, to the point to where it's big enough to be felt doesn't happen. My concern wasn't that it was a recurrence. My concern was that it was there all along - an affected LN that had been missed. But she said "If you can feel it now, it's big enough to have been picked up on your chest CT scan in August. And if it were too small to be picked up then, it wouldn't have grown to a palpatible size WHILE you were on chemo, that fast.
Make sense? I think so, but on the side of caution, we're having the ultrasound.............follow up app't in six weeks to see how tamox is going.............
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Calamity- Glad your dr is doing something and sending you for the ultrasound...
Lizzy- Glad to hear you're home
Ann- Will we ever be sure that the cancer is really gone? Sounds like they did everything they could, but i also wonder why they didnt just do the whole breast
Ginger- NOTED yes i have been steping on things and not feeling them fully (i still have a little feeling left) shoes are a must around little kids toys!
Omaz- What are the side effects of just herceptin? How long did that take to get?
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Texas - I went in for check at 9 and was done with the infusion out to the car by 10:15. The infusion alone took about 30 minutes. I am not sure what the SEs are, I still feel pretty achy, tired, numb from the chemo! I'll let you know. Hopefully nothing!0
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Texas - I do have an elevated temp - 99.7 which I didn't have before and around midday I got sick to my stomach and flushed. Also, I have been slacking off on my daily glutamine for neuropathy and it got a little bit worse so I am back to taking it regularly again. I wonder if you might want to try it. I use GNC L-glutamine powder, mix 2 teaspoons with water twice a day and drink.
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Libralil: Hope you are home and feeling okay.
Calam: Glad the doctor feels it is nothing to worry about and that she ordered further tests just to be thorough.
I updated my avatar to a recent picture of me with my "new hair". I don't do "boy haircut" as well as many of you. But that's okay, I have never placed much emphasis on how I look, so I am cool walking around just like that. Funny, after I cut my hair really short before chemo everyone loved the way I looked with short hair. Me, however, I want my long hair back even if everyone thinks I look better with short hair! In the meantime I laugh to myself at what people must be thinking about my choice of hairstyle at this time and wait patiently as my hair grows back.
I go for a follow up breast MRI tomorrow. The first time around it was the single most terrifying 30 minutes of my life thus far, so needless to say I am nervous...I am a little claustrophobic. But, I made it through last time so I feel confident that it will be less terrifying tomorrow. Then Thursday I get the biopsy results back from my GYN. Can't wait to get the next two days over with!
Goodnight everyone!
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Good evening chemosabes and radicals:
The nurse that I absolutely adore from my most recent trip to Smilow said I inspired him to get chemo certified. He said he was somewhat resistant because he was not sure chemo was helping anyone. He said I changed his mind because ‘I don't live with cancer but cancer lives with me.' I don't let cancer run my life. He totally inspired me to get back to school for nursing also. He put the happiest, most enjoyable face on that profession I have ever seen. It was such a pleasure being there and spending time with him. We are going to keep in touch but I can truly say it is the one time in many, many moons that I have met someone and we had such a profound affect on each other. Good stuff!
Sweeney: the wound is not uncomfortable...in fact I have no feeling at all. What is wicked uncomfortable is packing gauze into a hole where my boob used to be that is now 8 cm deep at the longest and 5cm deep at the shortest...very weird!
Calamtykel: I am sorry I missed this. I was napping! I cannot believe how scary that must have been. Hopefully the ultrasound reveals nothing. Don't we all have some naturally occurring cysts that kind of float around? Before bc I never had any issues but my sister had some breast cysts etc... so perhaps it is a cyst? Of course, if we did not have bc accepting a lump is a cyst is much, much easier. Wishing you the best with this one.
Sptmm: I will be thinking of you Thursday. I hope your results are fine. I don't know what is worse...them finding something or waiting for the results.
JSW: I ate salad right through with feta. I remember at one point I posted that I was not supposed to eat feta and someone set me straight so I ate feta again and it had no effect on me at all.
Libraylil: looking forward to hearing from you soon and finding out how your surgery went. I am wishing you the best and excellent margins!
Texas: congratulations on your heart results. That is really, really good news. Good for you. Also glad they cut the 8th...don't think it was within your best interests.
Ginger: good luck at the radiologist. Let us know what happens.
Zenith: this entire experience, from beginning to end, is quite enough to cause weepiness. Let it be. Sometimes it is cumulative also like you finally realize what you have been through and you are crying rivers for the months you have been enduring this process.
Well, Glee is on and I must tune in! Check you girls later-0 -
Zenith- I wanted to post about your earlier post too. Weeping?? Been there many times. For the months of Oct and Nov and into Dec even I was very weepy. I would cry standing at the counter. Watching tv. Walking to the school. Pulling on my socks. You name it. It was as if all the hurt, and fear and hormones and terror and drugs were oozing out of my eyes. Raw, but there it is. I thought I was going crazy. My onco, the loveliest woman on the planet, held my hand and told me I would be fine. She assured me that I had just been through a major trauma and now I was dealing with it. In hindsight it seemed very true. Almost as if I had to grieve the whole thing. It wasn't depression, it was just part of the overall cancer experience for me.
What I'm trying to say is that it's okay to cry it out. Some will exercise it out, some will fight it out, some will hug it out. But crying is one way to go- I did it that way. Not by choice, but it did pass and I came through less weepy. I still have moments. I'll hear something sad on the radio, or see another person in pain and I'm much more inclined to have that emotion rise quickly to the surface.
Anyway, as I write this I get a little weepy. I know how you feel and I'm so sorry you're feeling it. I explained it to my husband by saying, "it's as if I feel the whole universe a little bit more now". I think in the end, that will be a good thing- but it takes a bit of getting used to.
So a very big hug goes out to you Zenith. I've been there too.
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Sweeney: that is such a cool avatar and you look totally like the Irish flag! Great pic-
Appetite: how are you all doing? Does anyone not like to eat something they used to? Is anyone struggling to find things they like to eat? I think I will have NASA meal pills next! I am so tired of trying to figure this out. Anyone have any thoughts?
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Lizzy- right down to my verrrry Irish roots, I will take that as a massive compliment.:) As for food, the only thing I could eat when I felt sickest with chemo were reallly cold orange slices and balkan yogurt. Balkan is the rich, creamy, European kind. It tastes better than ice cream. Maybe try those??0
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Sweeney - Thank you so much for your kind reply. Thanks to all for your understanding.
Calamtykl - Glad to hear you have some good news and as always thanks for your information. I have learned a lot from your posts.
Lizzy - I get hungry but don't really want to eat anything because it still tastes bad - especially if it has salt and I am almost 2 weeks away from my last chemo. I have eaten a lot of yogurt as it's taste hasn't changed. I have an adversion to soup as this was my first food after chemo and I had vomitting with the first chemo. I force myself to eat protein. Cottage cheese doesn't taste good but I force myself to eat some. Oranges and clementines are the best! Lemon or mint tea instead of water are ok. I force myself to eat an egg for breatfast with toast. I can't wait for food to taste better and to eat hot spicy food again! I have avoided my favorite mexican and indian foods because of the mouth sore problem but plan a trip to a new camboian restaurant in the near future.
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zenith -have you heard of whey protein powder shakes? Whey is the protein part of milk. My SIL told me about it when I was on chemo but since I was already on a "green shake" containing whey protein from my nutritionist, I didn't follow up.
You can buy them in healthfoods stores- supposedly there is one brand even originally developed for chemo patients, but sold to the general public.
To me at least, my green shake tastes far better than Ensure! =:O
This is my green powder shake: http://www.nutriwest.com/cat/2743pf.htm and i believe it can be bought online also. It is not cheap, however you only use like a tablespoon at a time so it lasts pretty long. It also has sprouts in it and these are shown to have huge anti-cancer benefits!
I'm headed to facebook now - going to friend request you ann and sweeney!
I'm hoping for a better day today - yesterday was so scary....I found myself scared again today even after all she said, but I'm refusing to think about it! The Toby Mac song "Get back up Again" comes to mind "there are always scars, when you fall that far" and it's true. I think we've all been so scarred by the trauma of discovering we had BC that we will always have that "fear" of it happening again.............
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Lizzy: I had a hard time with eating during the week after a tx. I would be okay and make up for it the next few weeks, but there was very little that sounded good to me. And now, just the other day, I listed to DH the things I think I will NEVER eat again ... those things that I was able to eat when I felt so bad.
Cal: Maybe you can do something fun with your kids today to distract yourself from thinking. I'll keep praying.
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First off- THANKS! to all of you who have friended me on Facebook. It's so nice to have you there too.:)
Cal- still thinking about you today.
Librarylil- let us know how you're doing when you can.
Lizzy- your description of your wound sounds rough, but I'm so glad you're positive about it. You're really a superstar, you know that?
Question- has anyone had a period again yet? I have. And now I feel like my body is constantly fighting menopause. Not so hot for the hormone thing. Up and down. Up and down. I'm pretty sure my onco is going to suggest an "ovary ablation". Did anyone have one of those?
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sweeney - Were you strongly ER+?0
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Texas - Herceptin only - for me - diarrhea next day.0
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Thanks ladies for all the input on raw foods. Seems like maybe I didn't really need to avoid them but since I have been for so long now I think I will just stick it out to 3 weeks post my last chemo. I'm getting so close to the end, I feel like I don't want to rock the boat at this point!
Texas You were asking about Herceptin side effects and infusion time, like Omaz says the herceptin alone infusion is only about 30 minutes. After my first one I did get a slight temperature (about 99.5) and felt achy all over, sort of like when you are coming down with the flu. But then the next day I felt totally fine and I have felt fine after every infusion since. Occasionally I will get a headache on days I get a Herceptin infusion but not always and some Advil or Aleve always takes care of it. Hopefully you will also not have many side effects.
Cal What your doctor said about the probability of the LN being something (either recurrence or something that was there all along) totally makes sense and is very reassuring! But I'm glad you are getting an ultrasound to check it out as I'm sure that will give you even more reassurance that it really is nothing.
Lizzy My appetite was practically non-existent for the first week after each AC treatment and then gradually came back so that it was normal again by the time of my next AC. I think your chemo includes A and maybe also C? Anyway, I drank tons of Boost and homemade milkshakes and just waited for my appetite to come back. It is frustrating and I totally understand how you are feeling but I never figured out a magic solution!
sptmm62 Hope your MRI goes well today. If you still get anxious during your MRI you can ask your doctor for some anti-anxiety medicine (like Xanax or Ativan) to take before your next one. My aunt (also a BC survivor) gets claustrophobic and so she takes an anti-anxiety pill before she gets MRIs and she said it really helps.
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Omaz- I'm ER+ so I guess I should try and wipe out all estrogen....are you in the same boat?
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no period for me yet. that's totally fine by me! I have had rough periods. However today I have a headache for the first time in months. It's not a bad one, but just "nagging" sorta there. It is the sort of one I used to get on the first day of my period, so I wonder if things are trying to slowly gear up. I sorta hope not. And I'm SO TIRED -I could just drop even though I slept great last night. Go figure.
My hot flashes have been a little better at night. Told my doctor they're better since I started tamox and she didn't believe me. Said it must be a coincidence and that the tamox just hasn't "kicked in" yet....UGH!
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Cal- my hot flashes have almost disappeared on tamoxifen. I've been on it for over two weeks now. So maybe there's something to it?
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Sweeney I think Omaz was asking if you know what percentage ER+ you are? On your path report they give a percentage of ER+ and PR+ from 1 up to 99. Mine was 99% ER+ and 97% PR+ so super high. I think if your ER+ percentage is really low then there is some question of just how helpful Tamox and AIs would be. At least, I have seen women here on the boards question the need/usefulness of Tamox when they have a low ER+ percentage. I don't know what any doctors have to say on that issue. There are also some threads in the Hormonal Therapy section here that talk about ovarian ablation vs. suppression of ovaries by medications that you may want to look over.
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