You know youre a cancer patient when....
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you know you are a cancer patient when you say things you would never have said before in your life, before dx, before being faced with death......and embarrassing the crap out of your family when you do.
My daughter and husband have raged on for years about loud people in restaraunts. You know, the ones who talk over everyone else. Well, they've always been like "someone should say something".....so I belted out "HEY HONEY!!! YOU KNOW WHAT I FOUND OUT ABOUT LUCILLE??? SHE'S GOT CRABS!!!! YEA, NOW AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU DIDN'T DATE HER????" the whole restaraunt got quiet.
both daughter and husband looked at me like I grew a second head. I just went on eating dinner.
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Well, the interpretation of "You're so strong" was a made to a friend of mine, a Stage IV lady. She posted it in her blog (coffeeandchemo@blogspot.com) which she invites any and all to read. So, while I know that my friend RivkA posted it, I don't know the name of the friend who said it to her.
Leah
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you know you are a cancer patient when you can't breathe from your nose, your eyes are watering and you are sneezing like crazy - you get ready to call the onc to see wtf these new se's are from and realize - its my allergy season.
This is a GREAT thread - Anacortes Girl - this was a GREAT idea!
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Leah_S - Thanks for letting us know the interpretation history of "You're so Strong." It is SO funny because we all have had someone say it to us!
You know you have cancer when you keep asking your family if your "breasts" look even.
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When, out of the blue, your nose drips at the most inopportune time and for no apparent reason.
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when you read this thread and can relate to almost everything you read and can laugh really hard with tears in your eyes.............
you get your eyebrows waxed and the girl accidentally messes up and you say, no problem I'm an expert with the eyebrow pencil these days. And..........for some reason you really aren't mad.
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when you panic because you are getting ready for work, running late, and cant remember where you took your foobs off.
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When you open your eyes in the morning and your head is still swimming from the night before and you didn't get high or drunk!!!
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When you are bald and have no eyebrows or eyelashes and people say, "You look good!"
Leah
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When you pull in the parking lot and realize you forgot to put your falsie in; and you scrounge around in the car, come up with a sanitary pad and try to discretely shove it into your bra without anyone seeing....
Yes, it happened to me when I ran out to the post office this week. I think I did a pretty good job of faking it!
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when you keep flicking/twirling the tail of your scarves like it was your former head of long hair....defiantly!
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When you finally figure out that the reason you pee more on yourself (ON the toilet) than into the water below is because you have NO pubic hair to direct the flow!!
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You know you are a cancer patient when:
You didn't notice the man at the bar touching your breast and one of your biggest fears in life is that the dog will chew up your prosthetic..
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iodine - that happens to me now ALL THE TIME!!! I tried to do the squat and pee last week and got pee on my pants - the one day wear khaki and not black! Then I tried to wash and dry it out in the restroom. And I was in a sales meeting, thinking "people are going to think I'm pooping because I'm in here for so long" LOL!!!
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when... you're in a meeting with customers and business associates and suddenly have a hot flash, then you're afraid you'll pass out, fall on the floor and your wig will come off! (happened to me yesterday - I managed to not pass out - thank God).
When you go out to dinner with other survivor friends and close down the restaurant, talking about breast cancer woes all night!
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Love ya, Kitty! Those are some wonderful times!
Leah, laughing so hard at the "You look good!" one...!
I don't have any more to add today, I used all mine up a couple days ago...just came by to have a laugh!
Thanks, ladies
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...........you are so keen to get rid of the pain in your throat from rads that you toss back the aneasthetic goop they give you before asking whether you have to spit or swallow afterwards.
And then after you swallow it, you rush out of there so that you do not die in that department of the hospital. Well...............I almost died..............of embarassment.
Sheila.
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what a funny thread. please keep them coming.
( i love the doggie sleeping on a foob)
(kind of a book waiting to happen with sales supporting bc patients in ways komen doesn't)
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when you think it's normal to remove your shirt in a hospital waiting room full of people as you see the on-call onc approaching you with your neulasta shot. (Wasn't till he said something that I realized it was weird.)
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your husband is okay with you getting felt up by everyone in town.
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I so remember that cycle Faith. I'd just get my eyelashes filling in and I'd blink and they were all falling out again. Thankfully this too does stop. Although honestly my eyebrows never totally grew back. I found a great brow pencil with Mary Kaye.
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when your treatment plan involves turning you into a big, fat, beefy, red-faced bald guy.
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gsg - OMG!!!!!!! I'm on the same treatment plan!0
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after 10 years of an external prosthetic, you now have an implant but still worry every morning that you forgot to put the thing in....and oh, how I remember about the dog taking off with it, thanks for that giggle!
and you really know that you are a cancer patient when the prosthetic pops a leak on the way to the Sturgis Bike Rally and you whip out the duct tape, secure the leak, pop it back in and motor on down the highway - yes, that happened in 2004 on the way to do my 50th B-day in Sturgis - an item on my bucket list!
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gsg,
LOL!
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...when, for the first time in your life, you know what it's like to have a sister- not just a best friend- but a real, true Soul Sister... or three!0
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when you lift up you shirt to check on your foobs when stopped at a red light...
when you know what makes a chemo-fart different from a regular fart...
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when you aren't reaaaaaaaaally sure if this bout of the squirts is from the two day old burrito you sucked down over a short lunch at work, or chemo.....
when you work to prepare a great meal for the first time in forever for your family, but chemotardedness allows you to walk off following some other thought and you let it burn.
when you open the envelope from your insurance provider and breath a sigh of relief that your chemo only cost you 1,000 per treatment instead of 5,000.
when you realize your new foobs are worth 44,000 dollars apiece (lat flap, surgery suite, three day hospital stay, two surgeons, fills....exchange surgery). Makes me kinda particular about who gets to touch em. I'm thinkin of charging a fee to help pay for em.
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Pamelajo: LOL, I like the idea of charging a fee for a feel!
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you know you are a cancer patient when your CBC and labs are all abnormal and the onc tells you not to worry ... that's normal ... and you finished chemo 6 months ago!0