Starting Chemo in Nov. 2011...anyone else?
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Linda, I have 1 chemotoenail on my left foot Big Toe and got MRSA in that, so please be careful. Any sign of infection please go to the doctor. I tried to "doctor" it myself for a few weeks and it got away from me. The antibiotic for that is a awful, and I was on it for about 5 weeks. Some of the SEs are very similar to chemo SEs. Now the toenail is all narly looking and ugly.
You've been through so much, I just hate it that you have to do chemo again. Do you know how long or how many tx you'll have? I hope you don't have any bad SEs.
Hooray! for 61. I'm with you. When I grow up I want to be an old lady.
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Happy Birthday Phyllis...it feels so good to have them now! My CT scan came back clear YAY!!! No cancer seen. I do have a mild case of emphysema. I will see a pulmonary doctor next week. I am taking muscle relaxers. I have a muscle spasm from picking up shells on the beach this past weekend.
Now I need to get serious about the gym. I had my last physical therapy appointment today and was released. My husband said I could join the gym at any time. I think it will be next week. I can't wait to get in the pool and exercise!
My husband took me to lunch to celebrate the the all clear report. I have been craving mexican food and it was so good! It's been raining here today and so gloomy. Sunshine is next week. I am hoping the pain is gone and I can work outside! Blessings to everyone!
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Happy Birthday, Phyllis
Beth-Great news on your scan. You picked a great way to celebrate. Mexican food is my favorite also.
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Beth, Congratulations on your clear scan! I'm excited. for you and bahamamom. I hope the docs can fond you some relief from the emphysema.
Phyllis0 -
Phyllis, my april 4 post was meant for you. That's what I get for not proof reading.
Beth, congratulations on your clear scan
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GrandmaV, did you lose the nail and it came back ugly or did it just stay ugly?
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Phyllis, I saw your post to grandma and just wanted to tell you that I lost all fingernails and toenails with taxotere. Fingernails came off a piece at the time over a new layer that was developing underneath. The toenails came off in one whole piece. I took biotin to help out because I was so disgusted by their looks. All of them are fine now.
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Bahamamom, I am so sorry about your nails! I have no idea why I'm so fixated on my toenails right now (other than they hurt). I guess I'm still trying to figure out if it's worth having them removed if the Ixemprin will kill them again anyway. That, plus it keeps me from focusing on the upcoming chemo.
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Phyllis, I went to the podiatrist and he cut the toenail on each side and used some kind of acid on big q-tip like things and stuck them down underneath the skin to kill the 'roots' on each side. Thankfully he deadened it first. I wish he had taken out the whole nail, because the middle part started growing underneath the parts of the nail he left and so I have this really narrow, thick, bumpy nail and the skin is hard on each side of the nail like really wide cuticles. But it doesn't hurt now. I can't imagine what bahamamom went through with all of them giving her problems.
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GrandmaV, I hope my guy will do something like that so I don't have a raw, weepy nail bed exposed while doing chemo. At least I think I hope that!
Phyllis0 -
Phyllis, I think it helped it heal. The pain was a lot worse before the procedure than it was after the procedure. Had to have a big ole' bandage on it for a couple weeks and then a smaller one for couple more weeks, but keep in mind it was infected. As long as you don't have an infection it should heal up a lot faster.
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this is an OT post! But I feel like I know everyone here and need to vent or some such. My husband and I have been separated for 2 years, well before my dx. I was the one that initiated the separation, he never really wanted it. We put the diviorce on hold when I was DX and then when I felt up to getting theprocess going again, he had a major heart attack a week before my MX surgery a year ago in February. So things wen t back on hold.
Now fast forward to today. We went out to lunch following his cardilogy appt, he is doing well, and the intent was to discuss getting the process going again. I have been the one asking for us to sit down negotiate the final few details, $ of course, he he has kept putting it off. Today he says I need to move on with my life, I am dating! REALLY!! Although I was pretty sure he was and I am the one who asked for this, I felt like I was kicked in the stomach. And I can't wait to go to bed and cry. Kids around all evening. I feel well, treatment ios over, my MO says he feels very positive, so it is time. But really it is going to s***.
Thanks for listening
Be well,
Nel
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Nel - After I read your post, it jogged my memory that you told us about this as you were going through it. If I remember right, you took care of him while he was recovering, right? You were being very considerate of his needs after his heart attack, and this announcement of his seems very inconsiderate. After all, you put your life on hold for him and for him to now say "move on with your life" and he's dating is a kick in the stomach. I know it would make me feel I'd been taken advantage of. But you deserve so much better. Have your cry tonight and get it all out. And then kick him to the curb! He doesn't deserve any more of your time.
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Nel, I agree with GrandmaV. It makes me mad to know that he would do that to you. You have been through a lot of things too. Take the time to deal with it and get back to getting healthy both physically and mentally. BC takes a toll on all of us.
I saw the pulmonary doctor and he said I stopped smoking just in time. There was a very mild case of emphysema and he didn't see the need for me to use inhalers or take meds. I am so thankful that it isn't bad. I joined the local gym today and will start swimming and exercising to get these 40 pounds off!
It's a reainy, cloudy day in NC today but I am hopeful for some sunshine later today!
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Beth - so glad it's a mild case! Congrats on the gym membership.
Nel, I hope things are better soon!
I saw my new podiatrist today. He was wonderful! Kind, caring and he actually listened to me. He just trimmed the ingrown nails and said he didn't want to remove them yet, or do anything permanent since I'm starting chemo again next week. (The combination of compromised immune system and the nail bed possibly dying again.) Also, he didn't hurt me!!
I asked him if he wanted to be my new BFF!
I hope you all had a good weekend.
Phyllis0 -
beth, Glad to hear your emphysema is not bad. Hope everything goes well for you at the gym.
Phyllis, Yay for no pain. The way you described your podiatrist is how I feel about my cardiologist. It's wonderful when we get a doctor who is caring and kind. I hope your next chemo regimen isn't hard on you.
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beth and phyllis - Good news for both. Docs with a measure of caring and kindness, plus knowledgable - that mix can not be beat!
I live in Mass, about 45 minutes south of Boston and and I am sure you all know how eventful it has been here this week. I have been feeling, as have most of us in this area, sort of out of it this week. A "really" going through my head and glued to the TV. My hospital is in Boston, so my porta cath removal, scheduled for yesterday, was cancelled and rescheduled. Immeadiate disappointment, I am so ready to be rid of this reminder. Felt very selfish. But then a very quick realization, the removal, even most of the whole BC thing has been nothing comapred to what so many are going thru right now. I am here, I am whole.
Be well,
Nel
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Hi everyone, hope everyone is having a good day. This new chemo, Xeloda and Ixempra, is kicking my behind. I've been lucky to have my son here helping me for the first week and a half.
Today I finally faced the fact that I may not be able to work even part time through treatment this time around. I don't like it. However, whether I like it or not, my job is to get through this treatment.
Phyllis0 -
Phyllis, I "retired" from my job for the same reason. The 2nd diagnosis and chemo treatments got to me. I lost some friends because I didn't "get tough" and stay working. I worked at a public library at the reference desk and I was worn out working 3 hours per day! I am so happy to be free from the j.o.b.! We are blessed to not have much debt so I can heal and deal.
I have been going to the gym 4-5 times per week. I do aqua zumba, hydro fitness and back, hips and knees in the water. I love it! I have lost 3 pounds but more importantly, I am sleeping better and my mind is becoming sharper. I guess I am getting better.
Nel, it must have been very scary for you during the bombings. I cannot imagine being near Boston during that time. I hope you got your port removed. I still have pain where mine was.
I hope everyone is during well. I am using the greens from ItWorks and they make me feel better also. I mix them with juice each day. I haven't taken my vitamins or the greens for about 4 days and I have a lot of depressive episodes when I miss taking them too many times!
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I have not heard of those chemo drugs, but I guess they must be what your dr thinks is best this time. I am so sorry that it is being hard on you but grateful that your son is there. Loved ones really do help us endure. Just remember that you can do this. It is time for you to pamper yourself, so if you don't feel up to working, don't work. No one should expect you too! You have important work to do now - let that be your focus. Feel better soon.
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beth - so glad you love your exercise program! I know you were looking forward to getting started. Even more glad that you're feeling up to it.
As for work, I have to get over the feeling that I'm letting everyone down by taking leave. I talked to my boss last night and she is very understanding and supportive. I just hate that she has to find someone to fill in on a job that requires a LOT of detail and background knowledge. I also hate it because it is one more stupid thing that seems out of my control.
nel - hope you didn't have to wait too long for your port removal. What a senseless tragedy in Boston.
bahamaom - thanks. Today is a bit better. My kidlet goes home this afternoon. I will miss him!
Phyllis
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Yeah - porta cath removed today. So glad to have that piece of the process done!!!
Leaving for Bermuda with my kids on Tuesday - Life is moving forward.
Be well - Enjoy what look slike will be a beautiful weekend - at least here in New England
Nel
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Phyllis, How long will you be on the Xeloda and Ixempra (who comes up with these words?)? I hope this is the last time you have to do chemo. Since this is your second time with chemo I'm sure you have plenty of knowledge of what to do for all the SEs, but just as a reminder: Have you asked if they can lower the dose? Sometimes that can make a difference. I've noticed that some women get some relief from SEs by having them run a bag or two of saline before or after infusion. I wish I would have known these two things when I did chemo. It just makes sense that a lower dose and hydration would be less toxic. Hopefully someday soon they'll have cancer treatments that are more easily tolerated. I think about you nearly every day and hope that the SEs won't be so rough on you.
Nel - Congratulations on port removal and upcoming trip. Sounds wonderful.
Beth - Sounds like you're really making good progress toward good health.
Have a wonderful weekend everyone
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GrandmaV, I am just finishing my first round of Zelda/Impreza. Tomorrow night is my last dose of Zelda then I have 7days off. (I can never remember Xeloda/Ixempra)
Then I have 5 more rounds. If all goes well I will finish up in August then do rads. 18 weeks all told for chemo.
Yes, one of the things I said to the chemo nurse was please finish the bag of saline. She said "we really don't have to." I assured her we did!
Since the first chemo wasn't effective, I am going to try my darndest to take the full doseage of this one even if it kicks my behind for 18 weeks. Thank you for your good thoughts. I need all I can get!
nel, congrats on the port removal AND Bermuda!0 -
Phyllis,
Be well and kick it to the sidewalk! It deserves nothing less
I will be tinking about all while I am away. Any major stroms in the Bermuda area for the next 5 days it may well be me and my teens a rumblin'
Best
Nel
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How is everyone doing? I am feeling depressed for some reason. It comes and goes. I realize that I have moved from everyone and everything that I know. My husband works 2nd shift so my evenings are lonely. I have made some friends but no one I feel safe enough to confide in yet. I am wondering if we did the right thing by moving. Other days, I am fine. The last two days are crying days for me.
I am enjoying my aqua classes. I go 5 days a week. I do aqua zumba on Tues & Thurs, hydro fitness on Mon & Fri and Back, Hips and Knees on Wednesday. I love it!
Hopefully this depressive spirit will leave soon.
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Beth, so good to hear from you! I've been thinking about you lately. Sorry you're feeling down! Hope things are better soon! Just come and talk to us!
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Hello to all...I have been away from this board for a long time and I guess I just needed a break from thinking about the "big C." I know I have missed a lot and it will probably take me quite awhile to catch up. We did go on our Mediterranean cruise (chemo graduation gift from my DH and also our 40th anniversary is in November). It was unbelievably wonderful and it fulfilled my desire to see Italy and other places. I won't bore anyone with the details, but I just have to say Venice (especially the gondola ride) were amazing!
Now that this wonderful vacation is over, I am experiencing some weird feelings. I have this thought in the back of my mind that since I achieved one of my big dreams that "something" could be lurking near me...and I think you know what I mean. I know that I have to have another goal and also just have to keep on enjoying every day, but sometimes it's hard. I haven't been able to express this to anyone around me because if I even give any indication of how I am feeling everyone seems to say things like, "you look great" or "don't think negative thoughts." OK...I would love to kick these thoughts to the curb because I know it does no good to worrry, but how? Has anyone had any experiences like this? If so, how did you over come it? I apologize for putting this out to all of you, but I know with our shared fears, experiences, and triumphs, none of you would be upset with anyone for feeling this way.
As I said, I will have to go back quite a way to see what's going on with everyone, but I hope everyone is doing well and enjoying life. I will do my best to get caught up and please know that even though I haven't been here, I think of you often. Take care...hugs to all...Linda
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Beth, I know the move must be difficult. I moved from TX to NE 4 years ago. The only people I knew here were my sister and BIL. It can definitely be lonely at first. I was on the phone a lot to my best friend in TX. I hope you can find a new Bestie soon!
In the meanwhile, we're here for you!
Phyllis0 -
Beth - I am sorry you are feeling down these days. I know how much you wanted to move to NC. I remember when I was asking for ideas about indulences that don't involve food, you said that moving there was your indulgence. It is understandable, though, that you would be lonely in a new area. I would suggest staying in touch with your old friends. That should be easy enough in today's time with emails, texting, and phones making it easy, but I woul also try to find some new friends there as well. Maybe your exercise class would be a good place to start. It will take a while for a new friend to become the tried and true type that the old friends are, but new friends are good too. Maybe you just need to give it more time. I hope that the down feelings pass quickly for you, though.
I am doing well. My last day of work is next Thursday. I will be retiring after 30 years of teaching elementary/middle school. I am really looking forward to it. I probably would have taught a few more years, but being diagnosed with BC, I feel like my future is not guaranteed and I don't want to spend what could be my last years working as hard as I have been all these years. I want to travel, enjoy my grandbaby, and just sit on my porch with my husband and drink coffee and read the paper. I am still exercising 3 days a week at the YMCA. I won't say that I look forward to it, but I don't dread it either. I just take for granted that I will go. For me, that is pretty good. I have lost all of the weight that I gained after the BC diagnosis, but I would still like to lose some more. I am working on it, but it sure is slow going.
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