I look for other flat chested women. A rant.
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Did any of you lovely ladies use the silicone scar reducing strips for your mastectomy scar? If so, which type did you prefer?
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Hello Painterly!
I am using the Scar FX silicone strip. I managed to find one that is 22" long and about 1.5" wide. I cut it in 2 pieces, so it fits with a little to spare at each end.
I am a great devotee of this silicone therapy. I had surgery for RA years ago with a scar right across my knuckles. I used the silicone for a couple of months and it faded to almost nothing.
I am thrilled with the results so far on my Mx scar. It has been maybe a month, the color has almost all gone, and the scar is dead flat. Another month, and I think I'll be done with it.
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Hi ladies, I just had to jump into the discussion about what to wear when flat. I have my left boob, but want to have it prophylactically removed. I've no right breast, just flat as a pancake, which I like a lot. It's the lopsided look that bothers me, not to mention waiting for the other shoe to drop and get the DX of something suspicious in the "good" side. Anyway, I wanted to mention something humorous I saw online a few days ago: it's a tee shirt that has two fried eggs over the boobless areas and then a strip of bacon right below the eggs that make it look like a smiley face. I am tempted to buy one. I think it might be a pretty good disguise, but then there is the possibility it would just draw MORE attention to the chest...... What do you think?
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Redboots, I would never have worn that with both breasts much less being totally flat. I wasn't the type to wear "statements" across my chest. Logos had to be small and off to one side or the other for me to wear it or else I didn't buy it. But if you think you would be comfortable doing it, I say go for it.
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I agree! If you feel comfortable with that TShirt, you should go for it. I think it will bring a smile!
I happened across a Tshirt for Umx that says "One's Real, One's Fake, Guess which!"
Not my cup of tea, but there are some who'd love it.
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Yes, it isn't my usual taste, so it probably would make a bad statement. Actually, I'm pretty conservative. On second thought, it might give the impression I AM trying to get attention! Right now I am trying to be anonymous.... Thanks for giving me some much needed wisdom. My two daughters nixed the idea too. It will probably be best to stick to ruffles and big prints. I just bought a tropical floral print scarf with tiny lizards on it that I am planning to wear with black shirts. Much more tasteful
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I think the shirt is cute and I always smile when others wear things like this, but I wouldn't feel comfortable in it. One thing that I would do however is buy it and wear it as a sleeping shirt :-)
I am slowly learning if something brings attentuion to my missing breast places, I avoid those sorts of clothing. I have just begun the tremendous task of trying on all my clothes to see what works and what doesn't...I just couldn't seem to deal with it until now.
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Love it, Redboots!
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Not telling anybody else what to do – just telling you my own current state of being with regard to breastlesness. 1.25 years since becoming UMX. First year I wore somewhat camouflaging clothes – big shirts, tracksuits etc. Last couple of months it hit me that I really am not taking to the idea of wearing a foob. Think I was waiting to find that I would change with regard to this feeling. Instead the shift that has happened is that I have realised I am quite sure that I don’t want to. (Not saying I couldn’t feel differently in the future, the option to accessorise with a foob is always open).
Anyway since realising the change of heart shows no sign of arriving I have revised my behaviour. I had all my clothes from before surgery sitting in the wardrobe waiting for when I was going to get my head around wearing a prosthetic and could wear them again. Now that I have acknowledged that the change of head/heart isn’t happening I thought I would just go ahead and wear them anyway. I had been “not myself” up to now wearing the shirts and tracksuits.
Well all I can say from this last month is I feel so much better wearing the clothes I used to wear. I feel like me again. Yes I have no left breast but that is it…everything else feels more like me.
Second thing is no-one seems to notice – possibly because I am 45 and not in the spotlight of youth and beauty?
I can’t stress how good I feel wearing MY NORMAL CLOTHES AGAIN.
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So glad to see this topic. I just got diagnosed on 4/26/13 with IDC of left breast well differentiated (I think this means Grade 1?). Mastectomy has been recommended since I have two masses in the left breast (both small) ER+/PR+ and HER2-. That's all I know now. I'm thinking about having bilateral mastectomies as I would hate being lopsided I think and I don't want to have a repeat of going thru this again. I also have never liked wearing bras so I know I would hate any prosthetic. Altho I'm also have other concerns after reading about all the long term pains and sensitivities that some people mention as a result of mastectomy. How does one ever make a decision.
And I have to decide whether to go flat or to have the reconstructive surgery along with the mastectomies. I am a heavy woman with large breasts. If I was willowy and thin, I would definitely go flat. But I'm worried that a large, overweight woman would stand out more with no breasts and look deformed. I wouldn't care except I don't want to be noticed. have an appointment this week with a plastic surgeon so maybe I can get more info. But I would like to hear the experiences of those larger women and their opinions and experiences. Any sharing of info would be so appreciated.
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I've been collecting scarves and vests, but I'm just too HOT to wear them. Social situations bring on the tamoxifen hot flashes to the point where sweat literally soaks my clothes. T-shirts just absorb well and feel more comfortable.
My favorite clothes have always been flowery dresses, since I was a little girl. I like how they look when I'm inside my own house, but something about being around people makes me crawl back inside and hide. NO ONE NOTICES THAT MY BREASTS ARE GONE. Seriously. So when I go back through my insecurity rationally and logically, I realize I have some thinking to address.
I tried to make foobs. Funny story I'll tell only if you make me. They lasted all of 2 minutes on. I can't do it. I can't cover up what happened to me. It makes me too angry. Besides, what if I were to wear foobs and somebody liked me more with them on. Then what? I have to be who I am.
Plus with the sweating and all, a bra is just masochistic.
To be perfectly honest, I think I object to the overall, general middle-age assault on my "pretty young thing" I had going on. Tamoxifen makes my face look 10 years older. I'm not kidding. My hair is thinning and turning very gray. I'm not gaining too much weight, but for the amount of exercising I do I would've been rail thin two years ago. Deep black lines under my eyes. Aches and pains everywhere. I have to revise what I consider "beautiful." Unsurmountable resentments are lurking everywhere. When I see a beautiful young woman I feel envious, sad, angry, and afraid. To some degree I think all women go through this in middle age, whether they've had parts amputated or not.
I thought of you, Linda, while gardening today. Well, I thought about all of you. Because I was clearing out blackberry runners and had to stop because my gloves didn't go high enough and I scratched up my forearm. It's doing it's swelling thing now, so I'll wrap it and rest until it goes back down. Still, it doesn't take long on this website before I start counting my lucky stars. My heart goes out to those who find lymphedema is a superficial concern compared with, well, something much MUCH worse.
If I can garden and swim I'm still pretty d*mn lucky, no matter what I look like.
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Mshelton, I consider myself a large women. Could have had a lumpectomy but opted for BMX for a variety of reasons. I did not want recon and I definitely don't want to wear foobs. These are very personal choices to each and every one of us that only the individual can make. I had to follow who I was and not make my decision because of what society sees of me as a woman. I would suggest you do research beyond your appointment with the plastic surgeon just to round out (no pun intended) your knowledge. The outcomes of recon vary widely.
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Happyraccoon, I think if I can still garden, I will survive. Pry my Felco from my cold, dead hands.... Besides, I can wear big shirts and floppy hats in the garden and not have to think about BC. Like you I just hate foobs. I just hate bras and have not been wearing one since I started rads and now that I am finished, I just can't bring myself to put one on anymore. They ARE masochistic!!!! Well I sure hope my hematologist does not put me on Tamoxifen. I have a couple strikes against me on that because I take Wellbutrin and it interfers with an enzyme in the Tamoxifen so it cancels out the good effects. I am waiting for my Estrogen receptor status (positive or negative) because my hospital does not automatically do the testing as part of pathology reporting if it's DCIS. I would think it would be a given since who knows what treatments will be needed after all is said and done? And I was on Fosamax for five years so I hate to start in on Aromatase inhibitors and fall back into osteopenia or worse. O.M.G. I'm going outside to dig in the dirt now.
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Ariom:
Thanks for the info !
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Hi all.
I'm just going thru the process of looking into getting a prophylactic mx- I had my original BC 10 years ago, had a mx, but I'm really tired of being lop-sided.
I had radiation last time so I don't want reconstruction as it would mean having a tram-flap, which I think is too much surgery! I really don't like the idea of boobs that aren't real anyway, especially if you can't take it off again if its uncomfortable!
So my questions are to ladies who have had a prophy mx after years of being lop-sided-
Are you happy with your decision? (no regrets?)- I know that may be hard to admit when there's no turning the clock back!
Do you find that if you do wear a bra it rides up without the remaining breast to hold it in place?
Are happy with your profile having no boobs? and Does it take long for that 'tightness' to go away & feel normal?
I really want to be sure before I go ahead- I've been thinking of doing it for a couple of years now & I need to make a decision!
I would like to be able to go form free & not be lop-sided- or if I feel like it wear forms for going out...
Thanks, any opinions welcome!
kt
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I love wearing a t-shirt with my flat chest. Not all t-shirts work but some do. I don't think we need to hide or cover up by wearing baggy, blousy, ruffles.
I like Elegantees but wish they had a better cotton count.
Some of my favorite t's to wear now are form fitting, but really quite feminine and flattering.
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I'm with MT. I like tee shirts. I love wearing tanks in the summer. What a relief just to have the tank and no bra.
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I am assuming that those of you who like the flat look, have really flat tummies? I had a little tummy before, but never actually saw it until the breasts disappeared. Then it was: omg I have a tummy!
I have been doing 200 sit ups every morning since my op in the hope of being more uniform...i.e. flat everywhere.
I still like the junior bras I bought which have little sillicone boobs in them to hide my ribs.
The exercises are slowly starting to pay off, but more weeks of exercise are needed to be where I want to be.
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Hi Painterly, The tummy is a pain, even as a Uni!
I have a friend who was ballet dancer. He worked for Qantas Airlines, and had a terrible accident where he fell out an aircraft door when the safety rail failed, onto the concrete tarmac below. He sustained terrrible injuries like a smashed foot and shoulder. The recuperation took ages, and he packed on a lot of weight.
He has been nagging me, since my surgery, to get onto the 5 Tibetan Rites of the Fountain of Youth by Peter Kelder. He insists that doing these five exercises has turned him around. He is well into his sixties, but I must say recent pics look good.
I have ordered the 2 books from Amazon, and have promised I will give it a try. It is a slow journey, five poses gradually increased up to 21 times. I found a demo on YouTube today. He insists it is a "belly buster" and that after several months you begin to look noticibly younger. I like the sound of that! LOL
I just thought it may interest you, since you are dedicated to so many sit ups.
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Hi Ariom,
I googled the book...wow sounds very intriguing, especially reading about hair turning black and great for arthritis. I do something very similar to right no. 2 in my daily routine, but not the 2nd part of it...sounds difficult. I will be interested in hearing how you feel and the rewards you get from doing these exercises. Keep us posted.
Awful about the Qantas attendant's accident but wonderful to hear that he found these exercises so helpful.
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http://news.nurse.com/article/20130418/NATIONAL02/104290009/-1/frontpage
Here is a study on breast cancer and the benefit of exercise.
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Painterly, I am going to give it a go. I have Rheumatoid arthritis, and I had black hair, check the color now LOL if it helps, it's a bonus.
I was a gym junkie right up till I was Dx with RA, after a trip to Kuala Lumpur.
I got a reactive type of arthritis, likely from a tic or flea bite. It has been the bane of my existence, preventing me from doing lots of enjoyable stuff. I have had some amazing surgery to restore my hands, but the steroids that keep the inflammation under control have have made me the heaviest I have ever been. I was a comfortable size 8 right up into my early 50's.
I read the article you posted MT1. I know I need to find something that I can manage that will do me some real good. I'll give this a try, and hopefully I can get into a routine of swimming too.
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I know I need to exercise (real couch potato now) but it is SO boring! What do you do with your head for 150 mins? I know I'm just whining here.
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Wren, it IS boring, but so is dishwashing and I do that anyway too.
Whenever I can, I walk outdoors. That I find very relaxing and not boring. When in the gym, I turn on the TV news or something. Then I walk my dog 2X a day, and that is also mostly pleasant and relaxing.
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Exercise is a head game. I have to say, now that I lift weights and I know the difference between how my body feels without exercise and how it feels with, I am sold. I love the way my body feels as a result of lifting. The skin on my legs is tigheter, my bum doesn't jiggle anymore and I am lifting and working out just enough to justify treats on the weekend without fear of gaining weight. I do 45 minutes 3 times a week and I walk alot too.
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I've always exercised and find it to be almost addictive. I change up what I do, reps and sets. I use hand weights and do leg exercises every other day in a circuit method so it's aerobic too. Then on alternate days I walk, garden, dance, do yoga - whatever I feel like doing. Ab work is every day.
Since BMX I can't lift the heavier weights I used to use (I kept trying and just set off so much chest pain it kept setting me back) and I can't do many regular push-ups but I've found that lighter weights and doing wall pushups have filled in the deepest concave areas of my chest a bit.
As to what I do with my mind, I play a CD or turn on the radio or TV, or as Momine said if I walk or bicycle outdoors I people/wildlife watch and daydream. Nice and relaxing, not boring. YMMV
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Addicted to exercise my whole life -- spinning, yoga, and I was training for the marathon -- but this last surgery has knocked me on my bum. It was only a lumpectomy (well, an 11 cm mass). Since then I don't want to do anything. When I walk fast my operated breast hurts and jiggles alarmingly (no matter what contraption I'm wearing -- I'm working on a better bra). And I'm extremely tired at the end of the day. Haven't been really talking about any of this with anyone. I don't miss it at all. And I used to have to make myself take a day off from working out!
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I play with my kids a lot but i make an effort to get on my stationary bike 4 times a week for a 1/2 hour. I know that's not much but it's good for me. I read mystery books
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For years I excercised 6 days a week & loved every minute of it... Always did my workouts in the morning so I wouldn't risk getting too busy to fit it in. Workout videos were my favorite for days when I wasn't able to get outside or to the gym. I had "lazy" videos (think gentle yoga) so I could still stay active even when I was tired or sick. Weight lifting and kickboxing were two of my favorite/least-boring activities. I do sometimes get bored with other stuff and liked to read on a stationary bike/elliptical or watch TV while working out. Got hit bad with chronic fatigue several years ago & had to stop exercising but I do still walk almost every day. Walking outside is not boring, and even better if I have a destination. Or you could bike to the store or a friend's house, then it's a mode of transportation & feels less like "exercise." Really hoping to try actually exercising daily again once I'm done with chemo!
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I saw a flat woman today!!! I was so amazed, and I am sure she was flat and fabulous because she was also wearing a cancer t-shirt. So yeah!!!! There are women out there looking like me and looking good too!
I am reading all the exercise talk, I am eating better, but not exercising...I just can't get my act together. I never cared for exercise and like it even less now. I wish I could get in the groove. ideas welcomed how to begin for a really super beginner??
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