The Hermit Club
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thank you Lauriei just feel beaten.....i have been to get dressings changed five times now and at four of those people totalky unconbected with my care have walked in on me topless being bandaged even though i asked for screens etc, they just walk round the screen and chat to the person attending to me, i feel like nothing, a freak and i just feel beaten, i have no more fight left
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Lily yes u do, u have a lot more fight left. I know u feel defeated, but this will not last u'll see. and u sound like u're very modest. so that must be difficult for u and I am sorry for that, I hope u get more comfortable with others seeing u'r body cuz sometimes they have to. Hell, I was showing myself to a cleaning lady, I thought she was a nurses aid to check on something, I'm not saying u'll do that, but sometimes u will feel more relaxed. It's nothing to the people who see u, but I understand it is for u. But I just hate to hear u have no more fight left, just take it slowly and don't look at this down the line, just one day at a time, one moment at a time--Don't be so hard on u'rself and relax to heal. Please
Skittle has been busy I know with work, thought we'd hear from her over the Holidays and we probably will.
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Lily find it ever occur yo you yo get as rude as the people walking in on you......they gave no right.....when someone intrudes on your spec tell them to get out...that is your right....
Mention it to whoever is in charge...this is wrong, and her is such a thing as patient' rights.please speak up, and not not allow them to do this....worst case tell yourDr, or go to the head of hospital public relations....remember the squeaky wheel gets the oil....
Please don't give up.we need you and are here for you.....hugs and prayers...
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ok Lily spell check sucks......lol
What I tried to say was did it ever occur to you to get as rude as the people walking in on you...they have no right...if they intrude on your space tell them to get out..........need to get rid of spell check, or get another stylus......lol
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first day of my Rads my son took me......we were waiting and this adorable black haired, blue eyed Addonis walked toward me.........I said to my son....."oh no, then said, oh maybe he is just the delivery boy"..........not....he took me to an area right near the Rads room where I had to get changed, then into another room and there were 2 women in there...very friendly, very sweet.......
His name was Mark.........Told me to get changed into the robe......I did....when I was finally called by Mark, I thought ok, he is not the delivery boy.........as I entered the room where they actually do the rads he looked me in the eye and said....."ok Genevieve you can remove your robe.........I looked right in his eyes and said......OK, MARK.....IF YOU CAN HANDLE THIS, SO CAN I........he and the 2 women laughed, and that broke the ice, and it was the beginning of a 38 week relationship...........Loved them, and Mark, and he was as old as my grandsons......he was wonderful....and a gentleman.........
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((((Lily)))) and ((((cami)))) sending prayers to both of you.
Lily, ducky is right you need to say something when these rude people walk in on you. That is just wrong. I know it feels hard to do, but if you don't they will continue to do it.
ducky, glad you had a good experience for your first rads.
Hugs!
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gramma.....it was good....to be honest this may sound strange, but I actually missed them after it was over.......
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grmmab........it's funny, but I am a GrammaB too, last name is B.....but my grands call me Nannie.....my great grandchildren call me G.G........
Watching Shark Tank on my new Samsung TV that 2 of my sons treated me to.......that was in addition to xmas presents...........I am a lucky Mom
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By the time I was ready for rads I felt like everybody and their uncle had seen what passed as my chest. So I go in for tx one day, nice looking young guy was there. My female techs said he was a student, and would I mind if he observed my tx? Well, what could I say? He watched, then, he was better than the girls getting this creaky body up off the table. I was sorry to see him go!
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Hi hermits- so I slept so well last night, I overslept. I woke up 10 minutes before I was supposed to be AT WORK! I was dressed and out the door in 20 min and only got there 30 min late. Thank god my backup was already in the command center. Now I am off again for two days, will work for 2 days before the New year, off again two days, work two days and off again two days. Then I go back to a regular Mon-Fri schedule on Jan 6th. It is hard to get used to the midweek holiday thing.
My good cry came when I was in the hospital for my ruptured appendix. I had an NG tube into my stomach and did not eat for a whole week. When they finally removed the tube and said I could eat solid food, I was supposed to get a tray that never came. There was a maintenance man who came in the room to do something and I was just sobbing hysterically. Then my nurse came in and said "what is wrong?" Oh everything, I thought, but I told her "I have not eaten in a week and now you tell me I can eat and no one will bring me food." The tech, who spent more of his time in the hall talking to his girlfriend on his cel phone dropped the ball. That nurse made sure I had a tray in front of me in the next 5 minutes. I learned during that hospital visit that the nurses are your savior while in the hospital. They are really the ones watching your overall well being. Anyways, I got a lot of it out of my system with that cry and have had a few teary days since. I am mostly stoic about the whole thing now. I was already all cried out from two deaths in the family and my sisters bc diagnosis the six months prior. God did 2012 suck.
Sally- yes, Old Town in ABQ. It is still as lovely as ever! Wishing you and Ducky the best with rad treatments. I had mine last winter, and internal rad (they do it with tubes vs. the external beam). I saw a Winter Rads thread the other day, have either of you looked into that? Great place to talk to the gals during this part of your treatment. Of course we will be there with you along the way too.
Lily- so hard to be not feeling well and perhaps constantly exposed with all you are going through. I know you are beaten down and I totally understand that. I am praying for you that each day will get a bit better.
Laurie- Skittle does pop in from time to time! But you are right, we have not heard from her in a bit. Thinking of her, B-girl, Curveball, Slickie Chick, Lori, FL Warrior tonight. Hoping everyone is doing okay, even if you are lurking (and I love the lurking thing too.....)
I think this thread helps so many, even those of us who are through the major treatments but still dealing with follow ups, AIs, etc. I cannot talk to anybody about it outside of my sister these days, because she is going through follow ups too. Friends just think it is all done, just like being over the flu or something. I think no matter where you are in this process, we have a way of understanding each other. The wisdom of our particular experience around this bc stuff.
Anybody doing anything for New Years? Eve or Day?
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had coffee with Fl Warrior last week, she's doing ok! Since BCOs upgrade she can't post from her phone but does lurk.
Jazzy I don't know where you find the energy. Can you bottle it and send me some?
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Spookie- well, I keep going because I have to but really wanting to slow down. I came home and got right into my jammies!
Good to hear you and FL Warrior are connected in person! Tell her we love her!
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Will do!
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I just discovered this thread while reading & posting on Insomniacs. I'm basically a homebody. I don't usually leave the house except for appointments, church, & the grocery store. I guess I got into this habit when my elderly aunt fell in her home, suffered a head injury, and came to live with me for 3 years until she died in June 2012. I could only leave her for very short periods. Though honestly I've always preferred home.
I finished active treatment in August. I'm having my third bone scan on Monday to rule out bone mets.
I see several familiar peeps on here. I will add this to my favorites.
Paula
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Hi Sotera- I remembered you from my recent venture into the Insomniacs group. This is great thread with some very lovely ladies in all stages of treatment. We call ourselves the "judgement free" zone and let it all hang out here. Many here are homebodies, some are hermits as they are able. I am a consultant and busy during the weekdays, but tend to hermit on the weekends and even vacations. Welcome to this thread!
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Soteria....welcome, so glad to see you........sorry we had to get together, but we love our "newbies"......we call ourselves "Hermies".......and it's just a name.......they are a funny bunch here, and so friendly, loving and caring.......
You can also try our STFU thread which is hilarious at times......yes.....it means what it says.....that is our answer to people who say, and ask stupid things about us......lol
We have all had a STFU moment.....even within our own families...people mean well, but they just don't think before talking.....,..soooooooo
Again......WELCOME, COME ON IN AND SIT A SPELL.........hugs.....
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Jazzy that's beautiful
Paula good to see u here, it is a super nice bunch of ladies here and I stick home a lot too, I'd prefer to for the most part, I've gotten used to it.
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Hi Paula, welcome to the Hermits thread. I saw you on Insomniacs thread. Boy is that place busy!! Don't know if I will be able to keep up!
ducky, I'm almost afraid to go check out the STFU thread. I can barely keep up with the ones I have already!!
Jazzy, gorgeous photo!!
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Wow!!!!! Is that close to you?
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Spookie- it is up in Taos about three hours north of where I live. One of my favorite places on the planet (Taos that is). That is one of the best photographs I have ever seen of the gorge.
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Paula welcome
Lily I agree with what everybody has said, I know you feel defeated and feel like you have no more fight left in you, but you do....we are here every step of the way and will carry you in our pockets...
Cammie {{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}
Chemo went better than expected....I am waiting for something to happen, came home and went to sleep then the steroids hit was up until 4am...tired but nothing yet, am getting it every week cause he divided it up where I don't get hit will it all at once....
HAPPY SATURDAY NIGHT!!!
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Jazz....looks like a photo......
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Blondie that's kind of cute---U'r waiting---Oh Steroids the only time I wasn't lazy--lasted about 2 days then right down hill and laziness would be all around.
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Jazz.....meant looks like a painting.....lol........OMG...I DO NEED HELP....LOL
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Well I told them yesterday I would do my own dressings today as I cannot bear keep going up there and I took a photo to send to my surgeon. It is SOOOOOO much worse than it was before I even started on the recon route. like rocks in my chest and valleys and ridges and just bloody UGLY and REPULSIVE, I cannot even look at the photo without crying, I feel more mutilated than ever, have sent image to surgeon and told him its a disaster. Soo unhappy, will not even let my partner see the image or me.......................
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Lily......I will not attempt to say I know what your going through...I don't....I will just say, my prayers go out to you, and so many hugs.......
As difficult as it is, please try to hang in there....I can hear the pain in your voice, and will continue to pray for you, that soon you will feel relief......take care...
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This old Hermit is on a roll this weekend. I usually only leave the house during the week for Wednsday night Bible study, but this week I drove across town on Thursday to pick up one of my grandkidlets, Jana, to spend the weekend. Friday I went to Kroger & Walgreen! Walmart on Saturday, church & lunch today, and tomorrow I have my third full body bone scan in a year. MO wants to rule out mets to the shoulder & lower right spine. All prayers appreciated.
The bone scan is easy enough. It's that 3 hour wait between injection & scan that I dread. OY.
Have a great Sunday.
Paula
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in your pocket Paula..
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Hi hermits- been working on tax prep this weekend and decluttering at home. My news years resolution is NO MORE PILES!
Lily- I agree with Teka, despite how awful it is to keep in the medical system sometimes, they may see things you won't see like signs of infection with the dressing change. They jump on that very quickly when they do see it. You are still healing right now too and things may look better with time. After my surgeries last year on all fronts, I look like I ran into Jack the Ripper and could not stand to look at my body in the mirror. I can tell you a year later, things look much better and less scary to look at. I know our surgeries were different too, but just wanted you to know I believe things will get better and you will heal. We here want that for you too-healing of the body and spirit. I also think maybe getting some counseling support would really help you too in addition to our support here. You don't have to be strong by yourself all the time.
Paula-we will be with you here during the bone scan process. Fingers crossed, and I will be in that pocket with the others for good outcomes.
Blondie- glad you are doing okay, despite the up at night business. We hold you in our hearts all the time as well.
DuckyB- yes, that photo does look like a painting! NM has the most beautiful skies and light I have ever seen anywhere. That orange sky is very common in the winter months. Okay, maybe next to the Hawaiian sunsets.....
We now prepare to leave one year and head into the next. Blessings to everyone here for a healthy and peaceful 2014.
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