CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.

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  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited December 2015

    Valstim52, here is link for you for best bird's document: Our Bestbird has written a wonderful book that she will be happy to send - it if full of well researched and valuable information:

    "Today marked a milestone I wasn't sure I'd ever see - I just fulfilled the 400th request for my complimentary MBC Therapies Guide.

    For those who may not be familiar with it, the 100+ page booklet, entitled "The Insider's Guide to Metastatic Breast Cancer" covers everything from standard therapies to emerging research.

    I hope that the document helps MBC patients and their caregivers to obtain information that would normally have been difficult to find, and that it empowers those with MBC to speak with assurance to their doctors regarding treatment options. Since the booklet was introduced in February 2015, many readers have kindly shared feedback as noted below:

    "I cannot thank you enough for sharing all this incredible information in your MBC Document. With the information you have given I am empowered as well as comforted..."

    "I've learned more in the last hour than in the last 6 years with this disease."

    "Please accept my gratitude for coming to the rescue. I have used your document often since I received it. It's downloaded as well as printed so I read it, highlight it and will be carrying it with me to my Dr.'s appointment tomorrow."

    If you have not yet requested a complimentary copy and wish to do so, please follow the directions and agree to the TERMS below:

    1) Email your request to bestbird@hotmail.com
    2) In the Subject Line of your request, type in the words: MBC Document Request Terms Accepted by <your email address>

    So, for example, if your email address is GotChocolate63@comcast.net then your Subject Line would read: MBC Document Request Terms Accepted by GotChocolate63@comcast.net

    TERMS for Requesting "The Insider's Guide to Metastatic Breast Cancer"

    The information in this document was initially compiled with the intent of providing the author with a reference for therapeutic options about metastatic (also known as Stage IV) breast cancer, its treatments, and side effects. This material was gleaned from books, Internet sources, and other metastatic breast cancer (MBC) patients. Over time, as MBC patients began requesting information, the document was considerably enhanced and is now being shared.

    The author is a layperson with absolutely no medical training. She does not advocate any specific treatment(s) or type(s) of therapies listed herein, nor does she bear responsibility for any decisions and/or therapies undertaken by the reader as the result of reading this document. All readers are strongly advised to discuss potential new therapies with their doctor.

    The reader agrees to hold the author blameless for any and all actions taken by the reader as the result of reviewing this document."

    I have read it once quickly, and will read it again soon myself, it is a remarkable document written by a remarkable woman.

  • duckyb1
    duckyb1 Member Posts: 9,646
    edited December 2015

    LE sucks...............after everyone screwing up my sleeve measurements more times then I could handle I gave up......I only wear the arm sleeve (over the counter) if it bothers me, or if I fly which is seldom........only did that up and back 3 times to Chicago...........

    It just caused me more anxiety, when I wrapped I was good at it.....was called the Poster Girl for LE Wrapping........WOW...how thrilling is that title.......

    Anway living alone made it so hard but I did it....chased that f/n ace bandage across the floor more times then I care to mention.......and whenever I wrapped people shut their windows, and put plugs in their kids ears...............my language would make even the heartiest sailor blush................try wrapping alone.....no don't if you want your santity.....

    So I said "screw it", and stopped it all..........was not worth the anxiety....sometimes when cursing didn't help I cried......and what good does that do........only made me feel more sorry for myself then I already did.......................facing cancer was bad enough........doing it alone was worse..........oh I have kids, they were fine, but when the dust cleared they were no where to be found........Mom looks good......sounds good............so she must be good.................

    Dear God if they only knew, but kids don't want to know......they want to live intheir own fantasy word of "If I close my eyes it will all go away"......well life doesn't work that way...............

    F/n cancer is real.....it hurts, it destroys, and it takes you down..........to a level you never thought you would reach................so you smile, and act like everything is ok, and then go in a room if you live with someone, or sit in a chair if you don't, and cry till you have no more tears.........and wonder.........Will anyone ever understand that I'm not ok.........this smile is for their benefit not mine................its because I know they don't want to deal with "me or my cancer anymore".........so I'll pretend I'm ok................and so it goes............

    We find each other here in this home when we feel we have no home..........no one to listen, and then there are ears that want to hear us............without getting that "look".................and eyes that without seeing them we know they feel our pain..............and hands that lovingly reach out through the "media world", and touch us with such love, a love we have not known since everyone thought we were "ALL BETTER".........HUGS TO MY BEST FRIENDS.........WHOEVER IS READING THIS......

  • rainnyc
    rainnyc Member Posts: 801
    edited December 2015

    Ducky, it is hard, isn't it? I have a great LE therapist, and while she's a perfectionist about the wrapping, she's also a realist. From her, I've learned not to beat myself up if I can't do it 23/7, the way you're supposed to. Which is a good thing, because I'm never going to be perfect (about that or anything else)! I do what I can, and t'heck with the rest of it. Making bread this afternoon and maybe I'll put the glove on when I'm done. I know I'll wear it tomorrow, but the air will turn very blue if I get bread dough all over it. I can't imagine what it must be like to be living alone and going through this stuff!

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited December 2015

    OH! Oct! Two things! One, Your doctor can write you a prescription for a 'Cranial Prosthesis' , then insurance will pay for it. Then it becomes 'durable medical equipment. And the other thing , I was up too late last night watching this scary movie, and I thought of you! This woman had a husband and kid, and a lover too. I missed the beginning, so, she was getting stranger and stranger. It all had to do with this octopus looking thing, that was on a bed in this room! OMG, that was one of the weirdest movies I have ever seen!

  • Lucy55
    Lucy55 Member Posts: 2,703
    edited December 2015

    Hi everyone.. Just popping in to say a quick Hi. Trying to get everything done for Christmas.. As well as trying to get the food organized, I'm cleaning like a crazy women.. So everyone can come and make a mess 😱

    Notagain.. Yay.. So happy your surgery is over with.!!! I hope you have a better day.



  • octogirl
    octogirl Member Posts: 2,434
    edited December 2015

    Hello Crazies, and thanks for the supportive words...

    I am feeling a bit better today, if for no other reason than I spent a chunk of the morning buying out Target for the grandkids who are coming up from LA tomorrow night with DD and SIL for a three day visit. Tuesday is my grandson's birthday. He is at an age where "Paws Patrol" is his thing. A 'Paws Patrol' Cake is on order. 'Paws Patrol' sets purchased at Target. I am happy that DD, SIL, the Grandkids and my son will all be here for a birthday party Tuesday night. Son flies from the East Coast tomorrow also, and will be with us until Christmas. He then plans to visit other west coast friends and family before joining us again, along with his GF who is waiting till after Christmas to fly from the east, in Monterey for New Years weekend.

    Anyway, I must say, those Paws Patrol sets are expensive, hope GS doesn't get over that fad too quickly.... I also got him a Curious George stuffed toy (am I allowed to call it a doll if it is for a boy? You know, a stuffed Curious George. What Gabe would be if Gabe were a monkey and not a teddy bear....GS LOVES Curious George). GS is also getting warm socks, a plastic bowling set one can set up anywhere, crayons, drawing pad, and I forget what else. :-) Then I went crazy buying stuff for my granddaughter. Normally I am not a Target fan but they had what I wanted and they opened early! (7 am today). I got there by eight, no crowds, no lines, parking a breeze...

    So then, after I had conquered Target on the Sunday before Christmas (no small feat), I decided I was brave enough to go to the grocery store. Which is the point of this story: I hadn't been in our local grocery store since losing my hair: it is one of the places I have avoided. It is a small town, and I know several of the clerks very well, and I just never felt up for explanations or sad looks. Getting to know your checker is one aspect of small town living I had grown to love, until I got sick. But today I wanted to do the shopping: I will be doing most of the cooking for the various parties, holiday feasts, etc., I know what the kids like, and I enjoy grocery shopping. Hubby is glad to go with a list, but even with a list it never comes out quite right, the way it does when I shop myself.

    And the grocery shopping went fine. I wore my favorite knit hat that covers all of my head, with a brim that hides the eyebrows, and looks like just something chosen for a cold morning like today. Plus it is purple, which always lifts my spirits. A sort of sad plus: my two favorite checkers weren't there today, so while part of me missed them, part of me was happy to have strangers check me out.

    So clearly I need to address this anxiety and aversions of mine. Funny thing is, when I texted hubby to let him know I was grocery shopping before coming home, he sent back a text that said 'Just Remember to Breathe. Deeply.' Honestly, he sounded like one of you Crazies. :-)

    So, I am working on it. I started with a little leafy substance last night. That never hurts. And some self talk this am. But mostly, I just decided that I would let it go until January 4th. After all, nearly all of my events between now and then involve only close friends and family, I am off work until then, I want to just try and relax and, as Gaia says, look forward to the New Year's dip. So, I am going to postpone thinking about hair until January 4th.

    As for the wig: the thing is, they aren't really me, or so I thought until recently. (currently, I am not sure if they are or not). And yes, MO did give me a Rx for one, which I never filled but could fill, though the money really isn't the barrier. I did buy a hair halo to go under my hats, wore it a grand total of twice, because it itched like crazy. I am not even sure where it is now. Besides, I don't really enjoy shopping (other than for presents for grandkids and grocery shopping :-)) and honestly wig shopping sounds like just another chore to me. But I've decided that if I can't see the hair really coming in by the new year, I will take the good advice you all have given me and at least go try on some wigs to see how I feel.

    As for makeup, I haven't worn any in at least thirty or forty years. Any. Ever. Since I was in college (and I didn't wear much then). I am an old hippie girl, I guess. People say (or used to say, anyway, before I got sick) that I look at least ten years younger than my real age, which I always credited to the (lack of) makeup (most of that stuff is bad for your skin, IMO). Well, that and to the fact that even at age 61 I never had any grey hair, never dyed my hair, until the day I lost it. (don't get me wrong: I'd probably kill for grey hair now). So, that makes it all the more difficult to think about makeup now.

    So, we will see in the New Year whether I change that look. In the meantime between now and whatever the New Year brings, as you all have suggested, and as hubby says, I am going to try and enjoy the Grands, the season and Just Breathe.

    Thanks to you, CT residents, for your patience and kindness with my fears and with my rambling..

    xoxoxox;

    Octogirl


  • DecisionFreak
    DecisionFreak Member Posts: 435
    edited December 2015

    ducky, what a wonderful post. I know that I am only Stage 0, Level 1, and that so many other crazies here have survived more than I can imagine. Still, I have cried and cried some days because it is so hard even with the low grade cancer that I have. Today, I got upset about something and my mother who has survived breast cancer and who is living now with metastatic breast cancer said to me, " I don't know what's happened to you!"

  • duckyb1
    duckyb1 Member Posts: 9,646
    edited December 2015

    What has happened..........uncertainty......and everyone handles it differently...........no one knows about tomorrow............if we did we would live our lives entirely differnt then what we do..........

    At 80 years old..............."I DON'T EVEN BY GREEN BANANAS ANYMORE".

  • DecisionFreak
    DecisionFreak Member Posts: 435
    edited December 2015

    Hi, tomboy, thanks for stopping by, for caring, for responding to my obsessive stuff. It was interesting to hear about what happened to you after the mugging.

    My dentist was no help. He passed the buck. He said I need a full evaluation at XYZ University Hospital dental school where I am being treated. I wrote to the RO and told her what the dentist said and asked her to forward my concerns about AI drug use with my dental issues to the MO. This MO is stunningly brilliant but still quite young. I did not get to have the senior MO on my team because I am not having chemotherapy. If the MO can prove medical necessity, I may be eligible for evaluation by an oral surgeon in the huge clinic where I am being treated.

    Has anybody here gone on AI drugs, not bone drugs, knowing that you have bone loss in your mouth requiring dental bone grafts or other problems such as periodontal disease? AI drugs can cause bone loss in the mouth and other dental problems too, and a full dental exam is required to start AI drugs. A dentist I saw at a major university clinic a few years ago found no evidence of active periontal disease. May be my dentist from years ago charged me big bucks for root planing and scaling to make $$$. I have seen the cost for these procedures, and they were reasonable but my dentist's charges were astronomical.

  • eggroll
    eggroll Member Posts: 117
    edited December 2015

    Tomboy, don't worry about scaring me. You were right, I did have all the symptoms. When you think about it, lymphedema and IBC symptoms are both caused by blocked lymph channels. So it makes sense that they would look the same for some people. I have always been that "one person in a million" to have the rare side effect or complication. It has made me very anxious to be around doctors. I understand so much better now why my mom smoked all the time and never went to the doctor. Just better that way and she lived to 78. My good-two-shoes life doesn't seem to be working out as well!


    Duckyb, you are a poet. Very lovely words. Keep writing. That's my professional opinion.


    All the rest of you ladies (and a gent or two!), thanks for being here. There is no "little bit" of cancer I have learned. And while some of us may have a better "prognosis" than others, we're all changed forever by the knowledge that life is fleeting, and we only get this one chance.

  • DecisionFreak
    DecisionFreak Member Posts: 435
    edited December 2015

    ducky, I don't buy cantaloupes any more due to possible listeria. I don't buy oranges very often since most are infected. I try to keep my brother from buying deli meats due to listeria. I am messy but I have turned into a sanitation freak. I wash the wash cloths and towels with chlorox. I wash all the other clothes with soap and vinegar. I bought my 85-year old mother a heap of high quality new shoes and threw out the old smelly ones. I get nervous when my brother drives to the grocery store. I cry often. I am a wreck. I admit it.

  • duckyb1
    duckyb1 Member Posts: 9,646
    edited December 2015

    DF......I don't buy green bananas because I'm not sure at 80 if I will live to see them ripen enough to eat them..........LMAO

    Never thought about the sanitary part of it......hahahahahahah

  • eggroll
    eggroll Member Posts: 117
    edited December 2015

    I shared this on FB but forgot that you guys might find this funny, too...

    Last week I met a musician at the Harmony Hill Cancer Retreat and invited her to come to my next American Pen Women meeting for artists, writers and composers. So yesterday, I picked her up and took her to the meeting. On the way home, I was talking about a duplex I was trying to sell and she asked me where it was. I said "Twanoh Falls Beach Club." And she said, "Oh I know where that is! I saw it on my way home from a retreat that I went to." And I said, "Oh really? Was it Harmony Hill?" and she said, "Yes! Have you been there?" and I said, "Yes, I went to their cancer retreat last week. You should go to one of those sometime."
    And then we both burst out laughing. I almost had to pull the car over.

    Because of course, that was where we met.

    A week ago.

    Oh my.

  • queenmomcat
    queenmomcat Member Posts: 2,020
    edited December 2015

    Decisionfreak: very much the opposite of stupid--being forced to choose between two so crucial life-affecting issues?

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited December 2015

    Ducky and eggroll: Too darn funny! Thanks for the laugh!

    Queenmomcat; absolutely right. The proverbial between-the-rock- and a -hardplace....

  • rainnyc
    rainnyc Member Posts: 801
    edited December 2015

    Today's food porn is below: bread with bulgur, half white and half whole wheat flour. The CSA box had a plethora of root vegetables, so I'm making soup with a mix of turnip, potato, fennel, kohlrabi, onion of course. And listening to Brahms's German Requiem.

    Today's Times had an obituary of Kurt Masur, who led the NY Philharmonic for a while. It mentioned something I'd forgotten, his performance with the Philharmonic of "Ein Deutsches Requiem" a little over a week after 9/11. I wasn't there--we'd gone on vacation a few days after it happened--but I read about it and immediately pulled out the CD to listen. It was one of two post 9/11 performances, the other being a Pete Seeger concert in the Brooklyn Public Library, that were absolutely cathartic. Seeger opened with "We Shall Overcome," and there certainly wasn't a dry adult eye in the house, which was packed with parents and kids. Listening to Brahms this afternoon, while I cook, I was thinking that in some ways this year has been a personal 9/11, utterly disruptive to our personal lives, not just mine but my family's, something that is part of the fabric of every day, much as I wish it weren't. It's in the pauses in cooking where I run into the bathroom to dab aquaphor on my achy chest, the scarf I wear so as not to draw attention to the fact I'm not wearing my foobs, the clutter of stuff in the bedroom: wig stand, bag o' medical supplies, even the wrapped gift for the LE therapist. So....this is a piece of music I pull out only every few years, but it felt appropriate for the moment. Grateful for the drugs, etc., that give me a fighting chance at surviving the cancer, but still trying to find equilibrium for the holidays....

    Thanks once again, crazies, for being here!

    image

  • DecisionFreak
    DecisionFreak Member Posts: 435
    edited December 2015

    ducky, I didn't get it when you said you didn't buy green bananas. So, it is funny, but not funny. Ha, ha, I think green bananas are sanitary.

    I heard a new word on NPR. Lardass.

    Anne, my mother, has an abdominal scan to check the breast cancer in her liver tomorrow. She is afraid the oncology group is trying to find an excuse for dumping her due to her age and the metastatic breast cancer. She looks great, the giant acites belt around her waist is gone, and her breathing at night is smooth, not disturbed. I told her that I would go the doctor's visit with her when they give her the scan results. I have the goods on this oncology group, clear grounds for malpractice. I also have some pointed questions about other aspects of this group's poor monitoring of my mother. One misstep by this oncologist, and I will send his ass flying into the stars. crazies, there is the kind, gentle me and there is the other me. I have a formidable presence that makes people nervous when I need to pull it out. I do not impose this side of myself on loved ones at least not on purpose. I have other big sticks that I can pull out if necessary. It is shameless but I will not sit back and anyone screw with Anne.

  • DecisionFreak
    DecisionFreak Member Posts: 435
    edited December 2015

    rain, food porn, priceless! This is so funny I would get a stomach ache if I started to laugh. Along with Darth Vader, Darth Vader's wife, and green bananas, I have laughed and laughed.

    Back in a moment to add to this post.

    rain, my house looks like a hospital. In front of the loveseat sits a porta potty without the potty. The potty is underneath the coffee table in case my mother gets an upset stomach. On the couch, my mother rests. She doesn't have a bed since Medicare paid auditors a bonus to identify two words in legitimate doctor's orders that allowed them to reject the claim from the medical supply company. My father served his country for his entire career, and this is what his 85 year old widow with mets gets as a reward.

    On the coffee table, diabetes testing equipment, a box of latex medical gloves, a special spray for wounds, fiber cookies, milk of magnesia. Anne's walker sits by the couch. On the big chair, a huge pile of jumbled clothes removed from Anne's medical bed so the equipment supply company could take it away.

    I could go on, but you get the idea.

    On the loveseat a woman sits writing on her cell phone to post on a thread called crazy town. She wonders how she will hold it all together.

  • Jackbirdie
    Jackbirdie Member Posts: 1,617
    edited December 2015

    DF- I'm sorry. Hugs.

    Rainn- so beautifully said and the bread is lovely. I went to a Christmas party where someone did scalloped potatoes with fennel and Gruyere. Just a thought. It was amazing. Since you have fennel.

    Notagain- thanks for checking in. I'm glad things ended up ok and you are resting well. Hugs.

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited December 2015

    Jackbirdie, that sounds so yummy, I have been meaning to make (mimic) these frittata's that this lady at the greengrocers market used to make. Any way, that's what my friend Darrin the Chef said they were. In little cupcake containers, sliced thin potatoes and some caramelized onion and some gruyere and maybe some ricotta? IDK, but they were soooo gooooood !!

    DF, You haven't read crazy town from the beginning, have you? I can kind of tell, especially if that is the first you have heard the phrase 'food porn'. I believe katy is the one who first called it that. Here is a big and gentle hug from me, for all that you do for others, and for how your life is not really your "own" right now, with all of your responsibilities. I wish you were free and able to dance away to the place you would want to be. But in the meanwhile, since there is nothing that you can do anything about, tonight, maybe to get to know us all better, (you will laugh, guaranteed) read back here from the very first page. I was thinking it would get your mind quieter about things you can do nothing about, tonight. ((DF))

  • cubbie2015
    cubbie2015 Member Posts: 773
    edited December 2015

    Hello, crazies! I just wanted to check in and say that I am reading along, although I have not had time to post. Too many pre-Christmas responsibilities. Hugs to everyone.

  • suladog
    suladog Member Posts: 837
    edited December 2015

    Hey there Crazies,

    Stopping in here for a moment to say hello to everyone... I've been trying to read along but stuff is pretty crazy around here and we have house guests arriving on Wednesday for 6 days. Yikes!

    Anyway I just want to get through the next several weeks and on to my final herceptin.

    Anyway... Here's a bit of food porn , gluten free Mandarin Orange Cake...

    image

    Descision,

    Glad you got help from Laura Essserman, she's my doctor and an amazing person

    Also here's a quick laugh for the kitty people

    image

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited December 2015

    Good Evening Crazies,

    It sounds like some of you are having a difficult time. I'm hoping the New Year is better for all of us!!


    Valstim52, Welcome to our thread!!

    image

    I'm very glad you found us. The beginning part really is very difficult. Things will calm down once you have your treatment plan in place. Please pull up a chair and make yourself comfortable. The ladies here are all wonderful and supportive. I also had two masses in the same breast - each with different pathologies. Please keep us posted on how you're doing.


    Mustlovepoodles, Welcome to Crazy Town!!

    image

    Please pull up a chair and get your crazy on. Very happy to hear you were happy with your wig. I had a wig that looked just like my hair. I wore it for awhile and got tired of it being so hot. Between the wig and the hot flashes, sweat would pour down my head and then my wig would slip!! haha.....Such fun times.


    Valstim52 & Mustlovepoodles, Here is your Crazy Town kit consisting of a flashlight, mirror, magnifying glass and coconut oil. Please us these items sparingly. The more you need to use them, the more crazy you become.



    Katy, I loved all the pictures you posted. I hope you are feeling better from your surgery!! Your tree is perfect. What a kind and thoughtful thing your friend did for you!

    NotAgain2015, Thanks for updating us. Sending best wishes to you for quick healing. Please let us know how you're doing when you can. Sorry they had to go back twice, but I'm very happy to hear the surgery is over.

    Gaia, I'm glad you're going at your own pace. So great to see you when you post, but we do know you're always right there with us even when you don't. :) I'm having my kids and siblings for dinner. I can't handle the big gatherings anymore. It should be quiet and easy. My nephew always comes over in the morning to exchange gifts with us. He lives a few doors down from me. I'm not sure if we will all get together for dessert not. Typically we do, but this year isn't typical due to my sisters oldest DD getting ready to move out of state.

    Eggroll, I'm glad to hear your comfortable with the doctors assessment of your pink breast. I hope you're able to get the lymphedema under control quickly. I'm wishing you minimal SE's as you go through rads.

    Rain, Two more days!!!! That bread looks amazing.

    Tomboy, Thanks for posting Bestbirds document!! (ʘ_ʘ)

    Lucy, I owe you a PM. Been crazy busy....I didn't forget!!! :)

    Ducky, I think we need to have some fun around here!!! I tried to start an ugly sweater contest but there were NO takers!!! hahahah Perhaps we need some entertainment????

    Octo, GOOD for you for not going to the party!! I'm willing that hair to grow as I type!!! Sending subliminal messages to your hair follicles.

    Sula, Loved the cat picture. I can always count on your for a good laugh and some very chocolate food porn!! What more do we need in life other than laughter and chocolate???

    Waving to Poppy, Littleblue, Rose, DF, Queen, Cubbie and the rest of the crazies.


    I had a busy weekend. Many in our family went to see Star Wars on Saturday night. Tonight we had dinner at my nephews. I just got done wrapping gifts and I still have bills to pay. I could have sworn I just paid those last month!! hahaha Sleep well crazies. Love to all!!

    Edited for typos. Just ignore the ones I missed.

  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,275
    edited December 2015
    Hi everyone! Busy with Christmas preparations, but I want to check in.
    I'm pissed! I'm so tired of aching every where and being tired. As non-cancer people say "Focus on the positive things"? I wish they would STFU!
    I'm not usually like this, but I keep thinking about how last year I had just finished chemo. I was weak and bald as a baby bird. (Not a good look on a 50 year old puffy woman.) With all of the routine monitoring tests that I can't seem to pass, I wonder how many Christmasses are in my future. Maybe I have PTSD? Maybe I'm just a permanent resident of Crazy Town?
    As always, thanks for listening.
    Please excuse typos ; I'm posting from my Kindle.
  • DecisionFreak
    DecisionFreak Member Posts: 435
    edited December 2015

    Oh, fuckity, I lost my post.

    tomboy, I saw that you mentioned reading crazy town from the start. I will do that soon. I can use all of the good laughs I can find.

    crazies, I was making an inventory of some of the fabulous online bargains I have purchased since the bc diagnosis. I can post shopping porn photos! Soon I may have to move out of the house and find a storage facility where I can live!

    The day is coming when my bargain shopping days must end. I have to start saving money for emergencies or for paying off the mortgage, or for dental work. The list could go on forever.

    It is XMAS now, though, and I am Santa Claus! I told Santa that I have been mostly a good girl this year. So, Santa (that's me!) has been on the couch bargain shopping online. I have spent enough on bargains tonight to, er, go out to lunch at a nice restaurant? I go out to eat about twice a year cause it is too painful for me to sit in a restaurant. I cut my own hair cause I am too fatigued to go to the hair salon. Last time I cut my hair, I thinned it out with $1.00 garden shears I bought at the Dollar Tree.

    I read back over the posts from the last few days and realized that everybody here is CRAZY! Green banana aversion, subliminal hair follicle communication, drive by postings, food porn productions...I got up one morning and wandered around in my pjs, and I suddenly found myself in Crazy Town.

  • DecisionFreak
    DecisionFreak Member Posts: 435
    edited December 2015

    I have not gone to sleep tonight. I am having a hot flash! The Tamoxifen is still in my system.

    slow, your graphics are priceless.

    Everybody, I bet you were thinking I was crazy talking about Darth Vader. The hilarious photo of Darth Vader was on the exercise thread. Someone also posted an equally hilarious photo of Darth Vader's rarely seen wife.

    The cats photo was too good. I bet those cats were really highly compensated actors. Cats must be the laziest, most uncooperative beasts on the planet. "A dog will work for your love. A cat will make you feel unworthy despite your love." I wrote that original prose just now. I didn't want you to credit Oscar Wilde. Okay, cat lovers, don't get your hackles up now. I am very fond of cats despite their self-centered qualities.

    I saw a funny poster for sale tonight online. The text read, "Cinderella didn't ask for a prince. All she wanted was a night off & shoes." Haha haha. That sounds like me. If I were really rich, I would own more shoes than Imelda Marcos. Speaking of that lady's shoes, did you know that someone rescued them from oblivion and mold and I think put them in a collection somewhere?The person who did this act felt like the shoes were an important cultural artifact or something like that.

    I have eliminated a wide range of foods from my diet based on my doctor's recommendations. I cannot eat for fun now. I can still buy shoes, though.

    Shoes! There is always shoe porn. I love shoes! Well, some people have special feelings for shoes if you get my drift. I simply love them. Any shoe porn I might post on this site would be family-friendly.

  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,258
    edited December 2015

    I sat here reading the last 4 pages about you gals....... I just feel so bad for all the hard times some of you are having! Some of us have it easier, than what is going on with a lot of you.......

    It's not only the cancer "we" are dealing with, it's all the other stuff.... It just drags us down in our heart.... Things and people hurt "us" and we get to a point where we just don't wanna DO it anymore....

    Ducky, that was such a beautiful, honest post you wrote a few pages back... (and you mean you swear????) Hah! No, I don't either....Winking It's just that when you get to be our age, you just don't like to take chit anymore... not from ANYone.... And these damn Doctors think they know what they are talking about, but SOME of us are different, and we just don't have to take or follow their directions! Because it makes us SICKER, or like me..... lost my hearing!!!! Exclamation Point! !!

    If it ain't our cancer, it's either family or the in-laws, or some smart-alec someone on TV! Wouldn't you just like to sit with a gun by your side and shoot the TV when some lame-brain comes on? Like that Ad where that little kid says "You don't look a day over 70!" Well I would like to slap that kids mouth clear into next month.

    We lose our patience, along with our sanity when we don't feel well.... And no we DON'T like to go some places we used to go.... and so many of my friends have either kicked-the-bucket, or are in worse shape than me.....

    But instead of crying about "stuff".... I'll just go back upstairs and try and sort out over 50 years of saving "things".... Things we don't need, or use. We spend the first 50 years saving our stuff, and the last howevermany getting rid of it!

    Ducky, you want to get together and just spend a night raising hell, and drinking and dancing?

    So what were you saying?



  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,258
    edited December 2015

    image

  • duckyb1
    duckyb1 Member Posts: 9,646
    edited December 2015

    Chevy........LMAO...............I'm the deaf one in the rear...............and ditto to everything you said...............hugs girlfriend and have a Merry Christmas.............a drink and dancing sounds like exactly what I need, ............

    Just tired of the same old bullshit............

    And why did I just say "Merry Christmas"............I hate Christmas, stores, decorations, Xmas trees, Xmas commercials, traffic caused by Xmas, gift shopping (which I don't do), Xmas cards (which I stopped sending back in 1991)........oh and how about the I damn "Microsoft" commercial..............where the assholes sing "Let There Be Peace On Earth"..................and they eliminate the lines in the hymn that say "WITH GOD AS OUR FATHER, BROTHERS ALL ARE WE, LET ME WALK WITH MY BROTHER, IN PERFECT HARMONY"...........

    SCREW YOU MICROSOFT, AND THE HORSE YOU ALL RODE IN ON.........................

    Phew, glad I got that off my chest..........and for you who love Xmas.............SORRY, just call me Ebanizer and I probably spelled that wrong.................

  • DecisionFreak
    DecisionFreak Member Posts: 435
    edited December 2015

    crazies, I want y'all to know that I do read all of the posts as I have time. There are so many important things said that I take time to think about.

    I am struck by the tenderness that you spend on your families and friends when you don't feel well. The big and small gestures so many of you are extending to others. For those who don't feel like doing a damn thing for anyone else. and who are taking time to rest or enjoy life, kudos to you too for knowing what is best for you. Many here spend time bringing laughter or the healing balm of kindness to those of us blinded by the head lights. Some rant and rail, and that shows you are alive and reassures others that it is fine not to try and be a Pollyanna.

    That' s all.

    tomboy, my life is not my own. How right you are.

    My house feels like a public place with home health nurses and physical therapists coming and going, ambulance technicians we have to call on a frequent basis, the police I had to call twice due to meltdowns my brother has had since losing one third of his foot to a diabetic foot infection

    I would not run away from this situation. I agreed to it when I bought and furnished this modest house and invited my mother and brother to live with me. Despite my mother's good pension, my mother and brother were living in terrible conditions a few years ago. I changed that situation at least for now. I may have to tap dance to keep the house.

    But, I would be a very poor woman indeed without the rich presence of my mother even though she is a pain in the buttocks at times.