CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.
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crazy doesn't land far from the tree0 -
Christine- I'm glad you enjoyed the time and let them treat you like a princess.
You should be treated like a GODDESS.. But I think let's take this today.
Warm hugs going through the air from Oregon to NYC. No plans for tomorrow night. I might have splurged with a but of bubbly for myself, but I think I'll wait for the liver results. For the moment, I'm thinking of calling it good on Jan 31.
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And speaking of New Year's, here's a resolution I can aspire to. Wanted to share. Hooe I don't offend.
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Sending it to my sister Jackiebird. So funny!!! Thanks!
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Hmph. Visited plastic surgeon's nurse for my three-week followup after reduction and revision, only to find I've got a bit of skin breakdown. Very small, not to to worry yet until that's showing signs of infection, but we're to keep a sharpish eye on it.
The catch is i've been coughing an awful lot in the last couple of days, and my temperature's going up. Not officially fever, but we need to keep a sharpish eye on that too.
Very DCIS problems, I know. But crazymaking for me. At least I get to take off the bleep post-surgical bra to air out the site on my breast. Unfortunately, that meant all the nerves along my anchor incision threw a really wild tequila party, and have been dancing the conga since. At least somebody's having fun, and it does mean that my nerves are still functioning. Boy howdy, are they functioning!
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love you Katy. And I agree with your New Years Eve resolution. The beach is so beautiful. Glad you got there. Jack and tutti shots are precious
Octo have a wonderful weekend at the water! Will you dive?
Chi. Great photos. I love Italy so much. The Sicily pics in particular bring back memories. Your new coat sounds fabulous as well
Slow how are you? Are things all settled down after a busy Christmas?
Cubbie sorry you didn't get to fully enjoy the holiday but I hope you are feeling better and I do believe there are small ways to make little presents and manic moments each day. Keep your senses open. You may find some holiday spirit yet.
Rain. How are you?
oy 8 pm and falling aslee. Pausing for a moment back in a bit
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Readytorock, welcome, and we'll be in your pocket. I'm glad to see your doctor is doing an ultrasound as well as a mammogram.
Katy, love the pictures, the pets, the beach, the thought for New Year's...I wish I didn't live so far from a beach like that, it's got to be therapeutic. The best we can do around here is the lakes, and everything is covered in snow right now. I'd suggest some sparkling grape juice instead of the champagne, but I had that stuff at a millennium party, and boy was it bad.
We let the kids have it, they drank all three bottles and went wild from all the sugar. They sneaked outside and ran up and down the block screaming "Happy New Year" and we had to yell at them to come back in because they were bugging the neighbors. I should remind them about that the next time I want to embarrass them.Gaia, your parents are adorable. You are so lucky to have them, and vice versa!
Queenie, I hope you can get the conga line settled down so you can party yourself this weekend.
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If my fever spikes high enough, I'll be dancing along with the nerves.
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Gaia, how wonderful to see that your parents want to be engaged in helping you. Doing something for another person is very good for stress reduction and mental health. The photos really capture something special about your parents.
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I am feeling like hell warmed over. The Tamoxifen effect is still with me. I just sit on the couch and feel terrible day after day.
I did some research and found an article on the NIH site that said that all women with a size D cup should be offered the option for breast reduction after lumpectomy unless there are reasons why it might harm the woman. Large breasted women have more problems during and often well after radiation therapy than women with moderate or small sized breasts.
Oncoplastic surgery as some of you know is at the cutting edge. I guess that is what I will be getting.
I saw a study that said a large group of women that had breast reduction surgery had 28 percent lower risk of breast cancer than women that didn't have it. No promise that removing a huge amount of breast tissue will reduce my risk of recurrence but it sure makes sense that it might help.
Let's face it. With lumpectomy alone and no radiation or chemo prevention, I will have some risk of recurrence. However, with breast reduction surgery after the lumpectomy, the surgeon will have a huge tissue sampling that might find other cancer now rather than later. And, apparently, there is now preliminary evidence that reducing breast tissue in women with large breasts MAY reduce the risk of breast cancer. Nobody is recommending breast reduction surgery as a standard approach for reducing breast cancer.
crazies, I feel sick, drained and exhausted. I am going to have to go into my GYN doctors office on January 10 to have an ultrasound of my uterus to make sure the lining is not too heavy. Something is making me feel bad, but I don't know what it is.
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This maybe what I look like after my ooph....But at least I'll still be here next year enjoying my favorite holiday... Halloween with the CRAZIES
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oh pardon the irony of my self pitty. We think my breast cancer recurrence is just the same damn lymph node I refused to let the docs biopsy last time because 'I couldn't take the drama and more bad news'. So they got the mastectomy with clear margins, the two axillary nodes they did remove were clean after neo adjunct chemo.... So they didn't give me rads figuring if those two were clesn yhey all were clean. WRONG. . Tamoxifen kept it in check for four years, not even palpable until the fourth doctor I insisted feel my pit. Now I 'll get it removed and all its bad neighbors following with radiation and an oopherectomy because these suckers are still 95%er hungry. Waiting for bone scans and cat tomorrow.... Oh the truth however painful shall set you free... And the best laugh is I may not have to do chemo and keep this crap nest that grew back last time. A strange wonderful weird thing to be thankful for.... In crazy town
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7of9, that's one of the things that makes Crazytown crazy - the weird things you end up being thankful for. Cancer is a strange experience.
Decision, glad you are getting in to see your GYN. You shouldn't have to feel so run down.
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Good Evening Beautiful Crazies,
Gaia, Your crazies will be right there with you tomorrow for your RO consult.Good to hear that your MO doesn't think your pain is related to progression. Your parents look adorable. I'm very happy you have them in your life. It sounds like they provide a bit of comic relief for you. Your pictures gave me a good chuckle. Crazy doesn't fall far from the tree. hahahahahahahaha Things have settled down from Christmas. My DD is supposed to return tomorrow, but she just told me she is under the weather. I encouraged her to stay home to rest. Time will tell if she'll listen to me or not. hahaha
7, We will all be in your pocket tomorrow for your scans! Reach in and give a squeeze when you need us. Please let us know how it goes when you can. Sending all of our collective good thoughts your way.
Gaia, 7 and Readytorock:
Readytorock, Welcome to Crazy Town!!
We will all be in your pocket tomorrow for your US and mammo. I'm very glad you found us. We will be with you every step of the way. Please let us know how it goes when you can. You will be in my prayers tomorrow!!
Rwiley, Welcome to Crazy Town!!
That anxiety can sneak up on you at the weirdest times. It doesn't always make much sense. The one year mark can be a nail biter. Please let us know the dates of your appointments. We will all crawl in your pocket when you need us. I'm so happy you found us!!
Readytorock and Rwiley, All residents of Crazy Town get a CT kit consisting of a flashlight, magnifying glass, mirror and coconut oil. We try to use these items sparingly.
Shorfi, Great to see you back. Glad you had a good time on your mini vacation.
DF, Great news about your reduction!! We must celebrate every bit of good news we can get. Doing a happy dance for you!
Smurfette, Sorry to hear chemo has been tough on you. I hope things start to improve for you soon. I would be pretty ticked off if the police didn't come when needed. I would definitely file a complaint. Sorry you had to deal with that on top of everything else.
Lucy, Coffee and donut break.....hahahahahahahahahahaha!!! We did think about leaving the train up all year long, but we are having a space issue. We will put it away for now and revisit its permanent place in our household when we make some room. I've got some decluttering to do.
Katy, I'm glad the texting helped!! It's a bit like having someone with you. We can't always be with each other due to distance restrictions, but a texting buddy is the next best thing. We are all anxiously awaiting your results. Sending good vibes your way!! Tutti and Jack pictures always make me smile. I'm so happy you made it to the beach!! Thanks for sharing the video. Jack is such a good boy. Un*uck yourself. hahahahahahahahaha.....LOVE IT!
Cubbie, No apologies in Crazy Town. You are always in our thoughts even when you're unable to post. I'm sorry you weren't feeling well. Those Christmas blues can come on us so quickly. I must admit I felt a bit like you after Christmas was over. Sorry you got short changed this year due to illness. Gentle hugs to you!!
Chi, Keep those pictures coming. I love seeing them all. Hope you're feeling a bit better. How are the blisters?
Pennsygal, I noticed you deleted a post. You doing ok?? Just checking on you.
Octo, 5 to go!! Can't wait to celebrate when you're finished.
Queen, Sending more chicken soup through the tube. We must get you healthy. Sending subliminal messages to your skin.....heal quickly...no skin breakdown. I hope your nerves calm down soon. If YOU decide to dance, we expect pictures!! haha
Ducky, How are you doing sweet mother of mine??? Got any family plans for New Year's Eve??? Love you!!
Tomboy, Hi!! Thinking of you, as always. ﴾͡๏̯͡๏﴿
Thinking of all my crazies tonight. Wishing you all a pain free, restful night.
Love to all....quiet crazies too.
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Perfect for Crazy Town.
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Hanging in their Girlie........'no plans for tonight, but going to my son's tomorrow........love you too
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Hi ladies....I went to see pain doc yesterday and now he has me on Lyrica and Hydrocodone. For the first 3 days I will take one pill at bedtime and the Hydrocodone if needed. Since having my MRI of the spine he said I have some "very bad arthritis", along with the progression of the spinal stenosis. He has scheduled me for another injection on January 15th and will target the worse areas in my back. Then I will consult with the neurologist and see what he wants to do. I'm not jumping up and down to do surgery on my back...but I am desperate for relief. I'm hoping it will be minimally invasive. But after all that...I'm just so happy I'm not fighting that beast AGAIN. Yay or arthritis and stenosis. How crazy does that sound????
Katy...Love your babies. They are too cute. You can always text me if you like. I mean that too. Thinking of you always and hoping you are having a good day.
7of9...I'm a two timer also....new primary. You will be fine and hoping you don't have to do chemo again. I'm in your pocket as well as the other ladies for clean scans.
Gaia...Your parents are too cute!!!! Enjoy whatever they want to do for you. I wish I had my parents with me
Slow...Hoping you are feeling better.
Octo...Enjoy yourself this weekend.
DF...I love your style of writing, You tell it like it is...lol. I was a 42DD and after my mastectomy I was a nice B cup. I wanted to be smaller. That is the only thing small on this fluffy body of mine...lol. I look better in my clothes. So all that to say I am very happy for you getting a reduction.
Ducky...Hi honey. Hope you are well.
Wishing you dear friends all the happiness and good health that you all deserve. We have ALL been through a lot...physically and mentally battling this beast. Let's continue to fight like girls and win the battle until there is a cure!!!!!!!
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Good Morning Crazies!
Happy New Years Eve
Maybe we can all intend to have a virtual collective toast of whatever we choose to toast with at midnight EST- I only favor that because I doubt many of us EST ladies will be up at 3am for the toast with the PST ladies. Who's in?
Ducky maybe you could put on the golden shoes for the occasion.
Slow 'bang your head here' . I can deeply relate to that. Finding a permanent home for the train is a good inspiration for de-cluttering!
Morning Katy, if you take a beach walk today i'll be with you in spirit
Octo are you going to dive? maybe swim?
DF how are you feeling today?
Ready and 7 a wave hello and welcome. I have been overboard for a while, but noticed you dropped in or moved in to CT. Welcome and good luck with appointments today.
Queen, I hope the skin and the nerves smooth out on their own. Take in lots of warm fluids!
Chi, you always seem to have fun plans, anything for tonight?
Hello Pennsy! how are you doing?
Tomboy do you have any magical NYE rituals?
Hi Rainny! as soon as I see what the RO says/suggests and then plug that in to what will be possible for work in January I will reach out to make another lunch date! Went to Marlow and Sons with my 'rents yesterday, they also own Romans in your hood and Diner. look forward to that.
So yes it's NYE I get to go to the RO yay. Oh joy what my life has become. Last year I was absorbed with the delicious 4 course meal I was preparing for my beloved and me. Even though I know it's not productive or 'spiritual' or whatever to hang on what was, I feel angry and cranky this morning about how insanely different my 'external world' is. I guess the good news is even though all the things that 'identified me' externally are on hold or may never be again, I do still recognize the person inside. I can live with that and cultivate that garden. It's just a really big change and a total rebirth in many ways. So yes I'm cranky and angry and scared and last night was in SO MUCH PAIN ( I have actually taken the percoset the past two days.... it is helping), but I WANT to live and create a new world /way of living and being. No question there. But just for 'old times sake' here are some pictures from 1 year ago
My 'cooking outfit"
Dinner will be served soon!
scallop crudo with truffle cream
seared scallop with bay and meyer lemon/wilted chard
mini souffle for something sweet
there was also a pasta course with shaved truffles. it was a fun dinner for 2. tonight I'll be lucky if I feel like eating at all.
YES I'm having a small, or not so small, pity party. I guess it doesn't help that Seth has had to work straight through all these holidays. My parents were going to kidnap me yesterday ( their words), but I b=want to get the ball rolling with this consult. Of course all my 'able bodied' friends are doing their things, which if I were feeling better, I could join in....
Anyway, I hope I get some workable info at the RO. I may be blathering a lot here the next day or two. Thank you all for listening.
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G..............you are adorable...............enjoy your New Year's..........and even if I don't wear my Golden Slippers all night, I will slip them on even for a moment and think of you....while doing a little Mummer's Strut about the house........love and hugs..........
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Shorfi..........doing ok, hanging in there......I too have wicked arthritis in my spine and also stenosis.........and yes it hurts.............
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shorfi we must have cross posted. Hope this new pain management rountine offers relief. Hugs
Ok getting ready to go to appointment. Definitely have butterflies. Don't know why docs get me so riled up. Always have even whe I used to go ,however I frequently , for normal check ins.
Oy
Love you crazies
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Gogo- you are too adorable in those pics. Love that smile. I'm so happy I've seen that same smile on my Skype screenthis year!!! 🙏🏻
I am so in your pocket for today's consult and hope to "see" you tomorrow. Definitely raising a glass with intention at midnight your time. I'll be there. 🍸
Ducky- thanks for bringing out the golden slippers! 👀
Ready and 7- dropping by for your pocket parties too. 🎉🎉🎉
Beppy and Tomboy- thanks again dear hearts for bringing us Crazytown!!! Did anyone notice? We just went over 5,000 posts! That's a lot of Crazy!!!!
I love each and every one of you so much. No one gets it like you do. Big hugs and looking forward to being there for each other next year.
And dear 2015: Fuck you and the horse you rode in on. Don't let the door hit you on the way OUT!!!!!
Happy New Year!!
🎪🎪🎪🎪🎪
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gaia, if you were not cranky and upset, there would be something wrong with you. There is a line from a poem, I believe by Yeats, "All has changed and changed utterly." And, that is what has has happened to you, and it is a bitch. It is not nice, it is not sweet, it is not kind. If other people want to say you are having a pity party, then let them say what they will. It is your time to grieve. I am an expert on that topic since Lyme disease and fibromyalgia took away my fabulous life in D.C. in 2003. Eventually I lost everything that I had worked hard to get.
The only thing that keeps me sane is gratitude, but I didn't get to that place overnight. It took years! And, don't think that I am grateful for having to deal with the low grade cancer that I have to deal with now. I am screaming mad. I lose my cell phone sometimes, and I call myself on house phone to find it. The house phone often records a message, and I am shocked at the way I sound. Angry, angry, angry.
dear girl, be kind to yourself. You have been thrown a big curve ball. Let others love you for who you are now. Take your pain medicine. Did you know if you don't take the pain medicine that your body may get to the point where you may hurt at the slightest provocation? That is most likely what happened to me. I know about chronic pain. You are having acute pain at this time, I imagine, or at least that is the way it sounds. Don't play with pain. It will alter your neural pathways if you do. If you don't believe me, talk to your doctor or do a literature search on PubMed.
I think it is great for you to celebrate all of the beauty and strength of the "old" you. Love the photos! If it makes you feel good to look at them, plaster the walls with the photos. Consider finding someone in your city who is an ACS volunteer for the Reach to Recovery program. ACS will match you with someone who understands what you are going through. Also, ACS phone lines are open 24/7 if you need someone to talk to.
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New Year's Day, 2015. ducky, I love your golden slippers. Please wear them for me too if you put them on.
What I have most to be grateful for is that we still have our beloved mother with us. She is having twitching above her mouth, and the oncologist is sending her for a brain MRI. I suspect he is performing due diligence, but Anne is worried. She has some symptoms, but I don't think they are serious. She has had a bunch of CT scans of her brain this year that were normal.
slow, fuckity, I have to go in for an ultrasound of my uterus along with regular GYN appointment on January 12. I am still having staining on my underwear that started soon after I began taking Tamoxifen. The doctor did a biopsy and found nothing, but he only got a small tissue sample. If he finds overgrowth he will have to do yet another D & C. If there are atypical cells again, it is hysterectomy city.
Everybody, I am craving sweets. Since I will not have chemo protection against the estrogen, I have to reduce my BMI from 30 to at least 25, preferably lower than that. It won't guarantee that I will be protected against the estrogen but doing nothing will guarantee that I will be at risk for all kinds of health problems. I believe the breast reduction will eliminate my neck and back pain allowing me to do vigorous exercise that will help burn the fat and maintain weight loss. As of this week, I have lost 38 pounds in the past 2.5 years. I was starting to pack on the pounds again with Tamoxifen and antidepressants, but I have reversed that trend. I want something sweet. It is New Year's Day. Common sense tells me that processed foods, sweets, meats, and dairy products must be limited. I have been eating little granny Smith apples and telling myself that I will kill myself unless I get the weight and body fat under control. I have at least 39 pounds left to lose.
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ladies. I love all of you so
Ducky thank you for putting the shoes on and doing a little dance in advance
Katy. Your brilliant smile shines a light for me too! And yes I will see you tomorrow
DF Hank you for your note and insights and yes to everything you say. I 'know this' but must learn to listen to myself. I have been thinking that about the pain. Realizing that it may be a rut/pathway taking hold and that is what helped me accept trying the Percocet again.
I gave more to share about appointment etc. but for now just had s lovely lunch with set candied ran into my dear cousin and we all sat together. Seth is off to work. I am going to help a girlfriend pick an outfit for tonight and then head home. So later I will report more
I hate that any of us had to find this place but so thankful we have landed in bebby and tomboys CT
Love you all
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DF, I wish I had only 39 lbs. to lose--my ideal weight is supposed to be 125. As if.....
It’s New Year’s Eve. Giving into the sweet craving tonight--as long as it’s not a binge--and then bidding the sugar adieu to start the year off sounds like a plan. It’s definitely what I’m gonna do. I backslid a little yesterday by ordering out for NY-style pizza and then having four little cookies--dang that Medrol Dosepak, but it and the doxycycline are keeping the bronchitis at bay (with help from black coffee and saline sinus spray). No fever, and I haven’t hit the inhaler since bedtime last night. (I normally use that thing less than once a month, so it’s frustrating to have to keep sucking albuterol every 4 hrs.). My plans for tonight are to host dinner for 10 at B’way Cellars, our neighborhood restaurant 1/4 mi. away. Normally, I’d walk; but it’s going to be pretty cold out tonight--so I’ll call ahead to find out if there’s street parking available (I don’t plan to drink even a glass full of wine--saving it up for Dom Perignon at midnight); if not, DH will drop me off, drive back home to the garage, and walk back there to be host. Or if I’m feeling really crappy, I will stay home, slurp some more matzo ball soup, and get ready for when my guests come back here after dinner for midnight bubbly & snacks. (Housekeeper is off from today until Mon., so I’m trying to ensure DS doesn’t make a mess around here).
So, on with the tour of Cagliari. Back on to the Crazy Town Tour Tram--c’mon, let’s go (or should I say “ajo_--pronounced “eye-oh,” which is Sardinian for “andiamo:"
Sounds so much prettier than “one way,” doesn’t it? I can imagine a tourist cell-phoning a buddy to give his location: “I’m at the corner of Senso Unico and Non Stagione:"
17th-century architecture. (BTW, the round “8” you see in these pix is our tour guide’s “lollipop” sign--we were bus #8):
Typical of most residential streets we saw in southern Italy--sunny enough that there’s no need for a clothes dryer; in the old parts of town, land is at a premium, so no backyards--clotheslines are right up front:
Not an alley--the streets are THAT narrow. Still, we had to flatten up against building walls to let cars through!
Looking toward the entrance to Cagliari's old Jewish Quarter (every town in Italy & Spain still has one--but only Rome’s is still active, with many kosher restaurants):
Rear of the Torre Elefanti (Elephant Tower). It’s possible to climb it (those terraces hide the stairs), but none of us wanted to--and there’s no lift:
This had been a synagogue:
Translation: “Holy Cross Ave., formerly Ave. of the Jews.” Like so many Italian & Spanish cities after the Inquisition (remember, Sardinia at one point was under Spanish rule), the Jewish quarters were not only purged of Jews but also made Christian in the extreme. Notice the present-day name is in Italian, but the original name is in Sardinian:
In case you were wondering why it’s called the Elephant Tower:
And now, after descending several insanely steep flights of stairs (the town’s disabled-persons lift was on the fritz), here we are back in the center of modern Cagliari. The obligatory statue of Vittorio Emanuele? Nope--instead,one of the kings of Sardinia stands guard over the piazza:
DH in front of a souvenir stand:
Just in case you were wondering what the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are called in Sardinian:
Off we go to explore the marina and beach sections. Off in the distance, the Devil’s Saddle; foreground, the salt flats, which are not just the source of the sea salt industry but also the home of Cagliari’s pink flamingoes (which were by-and-large camera-shy that day):
St. Francis stands guard over the beach:
So you thought Cagliari was mostly quaint & historical....
And so we set sail from sunny Sardinia, and say “Ciao, Italia.” Mañana, España. Buon Anno Nuovo!
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Yay for 5000 posts and thank you to our Mayor and other Town Officials for making it happen!
Gogo, I will be raising a glass in spirit as well, at midnight EST, because by midnight PST, I will be fast asleep, that I can promise! Meeting some friends for dinner but it will be an early evening...because yes, the plan is to swim and snorkel tomorrow. No diving though: I don't feel strong enough for that quite yet mostly because I am reluctant to wear the gear (tank etc) on my back when it has to be slung over bad shoulder and would rub against rads treatment area (worn like a backpack, and weighs 50 lbs., though of course it doesn't weight nearly as much under water. It is the getting in and out of the water that is the issue....). Diving will come soon. We have a trip to Cozumel planned in May. Maybe I will even have hair by then.
Your pics are beautiful. and so are Ducky's golden slippers (and we know she is beautiful when she dances in them). You are all beautiful. I appreciate all of you crazies so much and send hugs and love and smiles and hope that 2016 is a better year than this one. I'm with Katy: 2015, fuck you and the horse you rode in on and don't slam the door on your way out. Good riddance! Other than meeting you all, not much worth hanging onto about this year.
Octogirl
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Octo: any chance of pictures?
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dear crazies, I bought my mother a heap of new shoes and then threw away the old ones. That along with shopping online to buy Anne new clothes was my way of saying that I believe in her strength, her desire to live. A friend from church went shopping with me, and I bought Anne some nice cotton knit tops that day. I could see my friend's mind clicking. I could see her thinking "Why would you buy your mother new clothes. She is 85 with metastatic breast cancer?" I read her mind and said, "This is my mother's money. She wants new clothes and shoes. She can spend her money on these things." I was not angry, but I was surprised that this friend from church would even have these thoughts. It was for me an indication that my mother was reaching out to enjoy life a little by wanting new clothes. And, oh, how she has enjoyed these clothes. I help her dress and we put on new sterling silver jewelry that I found for her. People tell her how pretty she looks. Yes, I will take some photos next time she gets dressed.
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