August 2015 Chemo Group
Comments
-
DeeRatz -- That photo made me smile big time. Congratulations!
Jenphil86 - Thank you for the update and encouragement. At my first Taxol infusion yesterday, my nurse reminded me how important exercise is. I've been walking most days during AC and will continue during Taxol.
All this talk about grilled cheese sandwiches is getting to me, so I ordered one at the hospital yesterday. (We can order lunch off the hospital menu if we are there for our infusion at lunch time.) The food I had when I was in the hospital for my mastectomy was very good, but the sandwich yesterday was awful! Nasty "American cheese food," not real cheese. I'll be making a real grilled cheese sandwich at home this weekend.
0 -
@birdysmom--Love your hair--Looks great!
0 -
Kate-I think I may try some acupuncture for my hot flashes. Can't hurt to try. I haven't taken any vitamins while on chemo. I was told that I couldn't take anything. Once this poison is out of my system I will be trying the magnesium and Vit D for sure.0
-
LAST CHEMO GOING IN!!!
0 -
MsBrompton- Congrats! Hope all goes well
0 -
All is fine, I'm done save for the cold cap. High five, time twin!
0 -
MsBrompton, yay! Congrats!
Vickyrides, "pasteurized cheese food" is not cheese. No way, no how.
DeeRatz, I have an acupuncture appointment scheduled for the day after my next infusion. I really hope it works like magic, 'cause it sure isn't cheap!
0 -
Hey everyone!
My last post was pretty bad as I had had a horrible experience at the chemo ward.
Well, the day after my post I went to the ER due to a very rapid heartbeat (100-145) and fever (hovering around 100.5). Turns out it was due to a virus that had taken hold of me before my PICC dressing change, which is where my problems began. I had a hard time in the ER as well because they wouldn't let me sleep (I had slept maybe 30 hours for the whole 8 days from my chemo infusion to going to the ER), ie, they kept checking on me every hour, not allowing me to sleep. Finally, at 4:30 in the morning, they left me alone and I woke up at 9. Heart rate down to the 80s, fever down to 98.6, and they let me go home instead of putting me in a ward as it was not a white blood cell count problem but a viral problem. And I found out a dose of Tylenol PM would have helped me (I smuggled some into Australia last time I was in the States LOL) had I been able to talk to a doctor that day in the chemo ward for my PICC dressing and probably would never have had to go to the ER in the first place. Grrrrrr. LOL
Good news though! October 14 was my last chemo! And I just bit the bullet and stayed at the same hospital. No point in changing or stopping. The infusion really hit me hard though, and really was in bed for the majority of the first week, so I've only just begun feeling myself in the last couple days.
I will go through all of your posts. I've missed everyone!
But, most of us have made it it seems!
0 -
@octogirl, I will find you some purple hat pictures. Purple hats for the win! (One of my chemo buddies bought me a purple blanket to match all my purple stuff, because I usually use a sleeping bag to keep warm during infusions - the infusion room is chilly - and the sleeping bag can be a bit large and awkward to carry around, so the blanket will be more convenient ... and it's also warm and cozy!)
@kateb, so glad you're feeling better and ready to keep on fighting the good fight. I used to think that the whole "fighter" metaphor for cancer patients was a bit silly, but after going through chemo I understand why they call it that. It takes courage just to get up every day!
@deeratz, I love your photo! I want to print it out and take it with me when I have my last chemo, which I found out on Friday is actually just TWO weeks away, not three like I thought. Woo hoo!
@msbrompton, yay, you are done! Congratulations!
I am looking forward to being done, but I'll miss my "chemo buddies" something fierce. Fortunately I've friended them on Facebook so I won't really have to leave them behind, but I'll miss seeing them in person every Friday. We have so much fun. (I know that sounds really weird, but I swear it's true. I've laughed more most Fridays for the past 10 weeks than I've laughed regularly in years.) And yes, of course we should keep coming back to the August 2015 Chemo Group to stay in touch. You all have been a real light for me over the past 10 weeks, especially on days when I had little energy for anything other than eating and sleeping. When I check in with you guys, I feel like I'm not alone. I know I've said that before, but it's worth repeating.
Question, has anyone else had their cancer tested for genetic anomalies? I had something called a Guardant test (not sure about the spelling) which found two genetic mutations, both of which point to higher risk for ovarian cancer. They were present in only .2% of the cancer cells, so the risk is relatively low (and I already knew that due to my BRCA1 status, I am at higher risk for ovarian cancer), but I found it rather disturbing. Apparently they can test my bloodstream a few months after chemo ends as well. I'm not sure how that works, but my oncologist said it would be worth doing. In any case, I still have double mastectomy, some kind of reconstruction, oophorectomy, and possibly a hysterectomy to look forward to. So to speak. Not really looking forward to more surgery! But you know what, I am looking forward to more cancer-free life, so in my view all the surgery is worth it.
A more off-topic question, is anyone else having a burst of creativity during this treatment time? I certainly have been. Picking up knitting again, finally doing art projects I had put off for literally years, trying new things that I've been hesitant to try because I didn't know how well they'd work. I think the whole cancer thing has played the role of kickstarter for me, literally, because it's the ultimate "if not now, then when?"
Time for my 1st of 3 Leukine shots for the week. Every time I do an injection I get hives in the immediate area that are super itchy. My oncologist says that shows it's stimulating my immune system, so I don't hate it too much, but I sometimes have to take a benadryl before I go to sleep so I don't scratch the hives.
Oh I know one thing I forgot to mention: I decided not to tell my parents after all. I just don't think it would be good for them to know. As my hubby pointed out to me, they would not be able to comprehend the details of the small size of the tumor, successful surgery, successful chemo, and excellent prognosis -- all they would hear is the dreaded "C word" and they'd probably get scared way out of proportion to the reality. Especially my mom, because she counts on me for pretty much her only companionship (dad's not always the best companion because his Alzheimer's takes him off into strange, paranoid, obsessive thinking, to the degree that he doesn't pay any attention to her, just frets about stuff, usually imaginary, that thinks is happening). She still hasn't made any real friends at the assisted living place or gotten involved in any activities, so she's very lonely. I saw them the other day, and it really hit home that telling her would not do anything positive for her state of mind. So I'm content to just let them look at me funny when I come over to visit and keep my hat on the whole time.
Fortunately it's autumn, and there's a chill in the air, so it's not as weird as it would have been when we had regular 80-degree days over the summer! Now when I get my chemo diva hair, I'll have to have it cut a bit shorter, or else she'll wonder how I grew it back so fast! LOL.Good weekend wishes to all!
0 -
@octogirl - this is the type of hat my friend made me, it's not a chemo hat per se but the slouchiness makes it cover like a chemo hat https://www.etsy.com/listing/156089163/purple-knit...
This one is similar too https://www.etsy.com/listing/214464999/purple-slou...
And on the same theme https://www.etsy.com/listing/84964204/hand-knit-ha...
You get the idea!
0 -
Hi there everybody, just a short note to check in and let you all know I'm still around. And super special thanks to MomToABoy for checking up on me! Thank you, truly. I've been having a really difficult time with constant chemo-related infections, just about every possible side effect, and mega depression and anxiety. I have huge support from my family, friends and everyone at the cancer center, support groups, social workers, etc., but I have not been coping well at all. I'm doing a little better this week, and have been trying to get ready for my (probable) last treatment on Monday. I know we all have our problems, but I just haven't felt able to even look at the board in the last few weeks. I'm going to make more of an effort now, provided this latest treatment doesn't knock me out again. I hope you are all doing well and coming up on the last of your treatments as well. Kisses and hugs to everyone.0
-
Mom2ABoy, a) no I have had no bursts of creativity, b) I'm not telling my mother either, for same reasons as you (plus, she might decide to come and stay)!
AusUSA, well done on finishing chemo, sorry it's been stormy.
Bunnybumps, hugs!
To everyone still in chemo, it does end.
0 -
AusUSA: so happy for you: you did it. Yay!
Mom2aboy: I've been feeling creativity brewing. I'm a writer, and I haven't been writing, but I've been noticing things. It's really hard to explain. . . . I often use a coffee pot metaphor when I talk about creative process; right now I'm percolating. But, short answer, yes, I'm feeling creative.
bunnybumps, I was just thinking about you not two days ago. So glad you checked in, and sending big hugs your way.
MsBrompton: one month. I have one month left, and then I'm done with TCP (leaving just the H). I'm thinking about making one of those paper chains that we used to make in grade school to count down the days until summer vacation. . . .
More hot flashes last night. Ugh. Whatever. I'll get used to them eventually (since 10 years of Tamoxifen is in my future--I'll get off of it just in time to go through natural menopause--wheeee!).
I think I've all but decided to have another MX, too. I'd always had "lumpy," dense breasts, but I'm a little freaked out that my right breast has smoothed out (if that makes sense) since I've been doing chemo. My NP says that the chemo probably "dissolved cysts" that may have been in there, but my mammogram didn't show any cysts and having BC, doing chemo. . . all of this has made me slightly paranoid. The big question is how I'm going to get my insurance company to pay for the surgery, if it's not "medically necessary." Since I don't plan to do reconstruction, I wonder if I could make the argument that I at least deserve to be symmetrical. Thoughts?
I feel like I'm getting ahead of myself, though. I still have to have a consult with an RO--neither my surgeon nor my MO think I'll need radiation, but we all want to be sure--and I'm not sure when I'd be able to do the surgery; my right breast is the one that remains; I'm right-handed, and I need my right arm for teaching, among other things. . .
0 -
HI @KateB79 - I also had a single mastectomy and have to make that decision regarding the other breast. At this point I am leaning towards not having another mastectomy. Was it on this board that I already told my whole story? I can't remember as I have a bunch of boards that I bounce around on. Anyway - MO thinks I should but all my other doctors do not think it is necessary. So it would really be for cosmetic reasons and "peace of mind" which what said to me. I didn't think insurance would be an issue? I am not sure why I had that impression.
I do need radiation which was questionable also but in the end, I am having it (3/12 positive nodes).
It is a tough decision. My BS surgeon strongly feels that it is not necessary and he is a top dr. in his field. He used to work in NYC at Sloan. He says I have a .05% chance of getting cancer in the other breast a year so over 40 years it would be a 20% chance. I'll be 90 (God willing!)
0 -
Ugh. Bad day. The Abraxane gives me a couple of days of constipation but the big D always comes back. I lost a whole dress size in 12 hours. I want off this roller coaster. I think I have taken enough meds to control that and the nausea for now. DH wants to watch The Fog--I love John Carpenter... Just not in the mood for anything right now.0
-
DeeRatz and MsBrompton, great pictures! Congratulations on being done!
0 -
@Mom2ABoy - I haven't heard of the Guardant test. I did have a full genetic panel done at the same time as my BRCA test. I wonder if that's similar or if my insurance will cover it at this point. To be honest I'm a little worried about ovarian cancer now after all of this. Also it's funny you mention creativity - I've had a surge of craft projects! I'm crocheting my boys some blankets right now and I've also had an urge to paint even though I'm not really good.
I'm sorry to those not feeling well and having a lot of difficulties. I wish you all speedy recoveries.
Tomorrow is my last round of TC. I'm happy, happy, happy. But I also have a weird feeling at the same time, sort of like now what? How do you go on to try and get some normalcy in your life after all this. At least during chemo the plan of action is laid out for the time being. I almost feel like I need more direction in my life after chemo is over in terms of diet, lifestyle, etc. Seems odd, I know.
0 -
Congrats to all of you who have finished up!!! It gives me such hope and anticipation when I see some of you completing your treatment. I had my first of 12 weekly Taxol last Thursday. This has definitely been less bad than AC. Still, it wasn't easy. I think I am still so run down from the AC that it is making Taxol SE's worse. My chemo nurse said it may take two or three treatments to get past all the AC yuckiness, so I'm hoping the next few Taxol will start getting easier. Today is day four after treatment and I feel quite a bit better this morning.
Keep hanging in there!!!
0 -
Tam-I am- good luck getting thru your Taxol treatments. Hopefully you will have smooth sailing.
SoCalgirl- I know how you feel. I had my last TC last week and it's like.....Now What? I'm done so what's the next step. How do I get back to normal. What is normal. Cancer has consumed me since April 30 when the radiologist sat me in the chair and said "you have breast cancer. You have 3 tumors in your left breast and the likelihood of them not being cancer is slim". You sit there in shock. I walked out of the clinic and was forever changed from that moment on. So how do we get back to normal? My body has been cut and scarred, I have hard plastic expanders protruding from my chest. I can't go 20 minutes without having a horrendous hot flashes(which are actually starting to drive me insane, I just want to cry). So what is normal? Next we get to start taking Tamoxifen.....that will open up a whole new can of worms. I would like my old life back, my old normal.
I wish I was feeling some inspiration or creativity. I need to get thru these next few weeks. I am deathly afraid that I am going to end up in the hospital again. I am pretty much going to be a hermit in my house for the next 2 weeks. I am sick of pretty much everything. I really need a holiday. I would love to go somewhere hot but with my bald head I am not willing to do that. Not until I have some hair again. I am also going to have surgery in Jan to exchange my expanders for implants. So it is hard to plan anything. I feel like I am in limbo. I don't want to even look at trips right now. I need a plan, I need something to look forward too.0 -
SoCal I have my last treatment tomorrow, too. I feel the same way that you and DeeRatz do, I am not sure what to plan or do afterwards other than rest and try to strengthen. I go back to work the week of Thanksgiving, and I have surgery to exchange the expander on December 21 to take advantage of having met my out of pocket co insurance costs.
I'm tired and worried a little about being up to the challenge of working full time. I ordered the book that Kate recommended, so hopefully I can get the family on board to help me nutritionally. Right now I'm eating whatever sounds good, especially since my taste buds are in bad shape.
0 -
I'm thrilled for those of you who are winding down this phase. Way to go--you did it! And I'm not far behind you. I can't wait.
Though I think I know what you're saying about feeling slightly adrift. My whole life is planned around chemo right now--what will I do when it's over?
Carolyn, you'll love that book. It's fantastic.
Guess what's for dinner tonight? . . . wait for it . . . soup and toasted cheese.
0 -
I feel like I need to write, but I am such a mess right now, it's hard to know what to say. I am so happy for all that are finishing! "The light at the end of the shadows." It seems so far away for me. (Treatment 4 of 6 is Thursday.)
I hope you don't mind my whining here. I am really struggling with the anemia. Just walking from the parking lot to my desk makes me want to cry everyday. I used to be fairly active and now I feel like a sloth. I even stopped going to yoga because of the pain in my limbs and the breathlessness. I am not usually a complainer! If any of you are also struggling with this, it might help to hear from you? As soon as I am alone, I just get so sad. I need to shake this...
0 -
Cheri, I'm so sorry you're struggling. I am too. I'm not anemic, but it doesn't take much to wipe me out. Standing in line at the post office today was murder. I felt exhausted, and all I'd done was out of the usual was go to work to change my computer password. Hang in there. It does help to know we're all in this together.
The reason I was at the post office was because I needed to mail the application for overnight respite for my almost 17 yo with cerebral palsy. I've even had thoughts of permanent residential placement for the first time in his life. Fatigue and sadness. That's what I'm feeling when it comes to my caregiving. I pray it gets better when this is over and I can work on getting stronger, but truth is I'll be 54 in January, and I don't know how long I can do it. This is at least a step towards letting someone else help more.
I hope you start to feel stronger, Cheri, and that your hemoglobin improves. The weakness has been the hardest part for me. Hugs.
0 -
Oh, all is not colored pencils and roses around here. Today and yesterday I've been feeling super tired, and starting this afternoon at around 2:00, I started to get queasy. I took Ondansetron, but nothing changed. I actually had to ask my 12-year-old to cool it with his usually somewhat gross sense of humor, LOL. Having saltines for dinner, yum yum. I've owed a visit to my M-I-L for the past few days, not to mention my own parents, but in the evenings I'm just too tired. Hoping for better tomorrow.
DeeRatz, I hope you'll consider taking the vacation you want to as soon as you feel up to it. Don't let the lack of hair stand in your way. Just get a cute short wig and have a good time - no one at your destination will know what you're "supposed" to look like anyway.
Tam-I-Am, from what I've read in the accounts of AC on here, I think you'll find weekly taxol much easier to take. Ask your MO if you can have Emend, it made a huge difference for me in terms of nausea, today notwithstanding. I gather it's expensive, though, at least that's what my BS said. I haven't seen any kind of breakdown of my individual chemo drugs and their costs.
SoCalGirl, the Guardant test is a test showing whether the genetic makeup of your cancer includes any altered genes. (I'm not sure if Guardant is what it's called, or if that's just the name of the company that did it, or both, I'll have to look at it so I can provide some more details.) Here's an interesting tidbit, at my last appt my MO said that the company that does the testing actually wants the test results for research purposes, so if they bill me, to just ignore it. Not sure how I feel about that (or how my insurance company will feel either).
MusosGirl, I'm sorry to hear you are having a rough time today. Hopefully better days are ahead! We do not want to be losing dress sizes right now, that can wait until all this is over.
Speaking of when this is over ... I too have been wrestling with what to do with myself when my treatment is done. I'm not as far along as most of you, because my big surgery is coming up after chemo, so I actually won't be done-done until something like March, counting recovery time. Having just started a new job before I was diagnosed, I will probably not make a lot of radical changes in the basic outlines of my lifestyle, as it is working well for me to work at home.
I do hope this creative surge continues, though, in light of the invisible bookends now placed around my time. (They were always there of course, but until I realized that I didn't have all the time in the world to accomplish things, it was easier to count on "someday"). The funniest thing about my creative streak is that it involves drawing, because I've always told myself, and everyone else, that I didn't know how to draw. But it's like this diagnosis has unleashed a "what the heck" aspect of myself that simply didn't exist before. Maybe it's just that the relative risk of putting pencil to paper seems small compared to the slightly more life-and-death risks involved with having cancer. Not to mention that deciding what color to use next is way easier than deciding things likewhat kind of reconstruction to have.
0 -
And now after reading Cheri's and Carolyn's posts, I feel like the world's biggest whiner.
Cheri, you might want to ask your MO about B12. I just realized that my fatigue this week could be because for the first time in about four weeks I did not get a B12 shot at the end of my chemo session. I think it has really helped in the past, and might even help fend off the nausea in conjunction with the Emend.
Carolyn, I'm so glad you're asking for respite care. You do not have to do it all, and especially now, having someone to come in and help is essential for your recovery. Hang in there, having support will make a huge difference for you I'm sure.
0 -
Thank you, Carolyn! And prayers for you to find strength and peace with your decisions. Why is it so hard to ask for help? I don't know how those of you who are caregivers find the strength. I am grateful my kids are all grown up and I can actually find strength from them. Hugs to you as well...
0 -
I will ask about the B12! I finally see my MO again this week. I havent seen her since before I started treatment. I always see the CRNP, in whom I have very little confidence! Had some vijayjay issues after cycle 1 and she never heard of such a thing...told me to call my gyn. Only took a little tea tree oil and I was fine.
0 -
I have not posted recently because my chemo is "on hold" after my first treatment of Taxotere and Herceptin on August 17 that resulted in hospitalization/acute kidney failure/neutropenia/anemia. It was quite a while before I regained my strength. I have been reading all of your posts and see that many of you have had various complications on your chemo journeys, but I am happy that many of you are DONE or nearing completion! Yea!
Cheri1107--it took 7 weeks after my first chemo to feel back to normal because of the anemia. By that time my hematocrit/RBC counts had improved, kidney function improved and I no longer had trouble with normal daily tasks that were impossible when I was recovering. The good news is that I did get back to that normal feeling! Taste buds returned to normal, etc. I really have a profound appreciation for my old NORMAL!
My oncologist was hesitant to give me more chemo until my body recovered since it would likely do more harm than good. I did receive Herceptin alone two more times (no side effects at all!). My treatment plan changed from completing neoadjuvant treatment to doing surgery next. Last Friday I had a lumpectomy/sentinel node biopsy and am awaiting pathology results. I expected more discomfort but I have been very comfortable and almost pain free! Depending on the results/lymph nodes, my revised plan will evolve. I may be back on the chemo journey again soon.
0 -
Hi All. Congratulations to all who are finished and those soon to be.
Cheri107 ; It looks like you and I are on the same schedule. I have #4 of 6 on the 29th also. I am on TCH too. I had really bad anemia and my doctor DO ordered me to have iron sucrose via IV for 5 weeks and it brought my iron up and also my energy. I am now able to walk for 50 minutes a day at my near bye park and it has made a world of difference. Good luck #4. We will pass the half way mark. : )
0 -
Nah, mom2aboy, I woke up this morning realizing I was the whiner. Why is it so easy for me to slip into focusing on the bad day, when I had 2 good ones before it? Saturday I walked two trails and went out to lunch. Sunday I stayed after church for a drum circle they did in my honor. The drum leader gave me a gorgeous pink and white scarf suffused with reiki energy and at one point my husband stood behind me playing guitar while my adult daughter was behind me with hands on my shoulders. So, yeah, I am a whiner extradinare for not acknowledging those things just because my energy sunk again. I feel a lot better this morning.
This is my last one. I'm hoping she'll cut the Taxotere because I'm having numbness in my fingertips that I do not want to progress. I'll ask her about ice, too. Hoping for short lived SE this time, for all of us.0
