Starting Chemo April 2016
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A luxury in a way, yes, because I have more freedom to just experience.
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I'm waving at you lovely ladies from the April 2015 board -good luck!
One of the things someone said to me when I was going through treatment and the weeks were labeled out in my future by chemo round and Sept 1 (last chemo, taxol) was so far away - I was like how ever am I going to get there? They said - don't think about sept 1 - can you make it to tomorrow? How about Saturday? I was like, well of course I can make it to tomorrow! Focus on that - not the end date, picking a shorter date to look at. I'm a runner and also ran during chemo, the whole time. It was hard sometimes, and I was like, I don't think I can make 4 miles today. And my brain said, can you make it to that stop sign? Or fire hydrant? Or next mailbox? And I was like YES! And did I run the entire 4 miles? No but I ran A LOT of it, I'd get to the sign/mailbox/hydrant and be like, ok, I'm here, I can do one more mailbox length worth!
Good luck you can do this!
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Thank you The Princess! I am focusing on the next few days, my gym schedule (I am fortunate on chemo Thurs and the 3 days after I can split gym time into 2 sessions, before and after then 2 x a day with a lot of fluids out to flush this stuff out (after it's done it's job of course). I have 2 movie lists to watch the next 3 months, one to watch with our six year old, the other for me and husband. I will have to start a "me" movie list and add The Princess Bride! I love that movie. We are also picking up our boat from winter storage Saturday. I love yard work though docs told me no mulching or digging flowers but I am going to cut my grass as soon as this crappy Ohio weather lets me along with paint 3 rooms in the house. By the time this chemo is over I am going to feel so productive and not that it was wasted time at all!
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Numb, regarding your comment on loosing weight. 2 things I learned last time one I learned from a pro: if you start to loose too much weight (but you feel ok) you DO NOT have to look at the weigh in as the nurse does it each week. I was morbidly (the teenager in me) was fascinated to see it melt off but I started to turn around and face the other way the last few weeks because It did cause my spouse and my mom stress as I got down to just under 120 but I felt great and I treated myself to some awesome white capri's size 4!!! I looked great and felt great the rest of summer even though I went through expander tightness hell and I had hardly any hair til end of september that go around. Tip #2 - it's ok to loose some weight, there are less cells or sizable ones for the chemo to go hunt down the bad guys. It's like you just shortened the maze! Do try to eat healthy is all. And you have to eat something, even bland ole cheerios every two hours or crackers. They taste like nothing by week three or four but just take some water and swallow. It really helps keep nausea and acid reflux to a minimum.
I had an attivan about 2 hours ago and took the Dexamethasone earlier today as instructed. Just washing washing clothes and finished with my son and his homework. It's all attivan and amibien tonight then tomorrow more dex than a fat oxycodone with lunch and treatment at 1:15. I am planning on renting the new Star Wars movie tomorrow when I get home since I will be cold capping the full four hours post treatment. Then the plan is to yes, go walk one mile and drink a ton of water. Long day but 25% done in less than 20 hours. Whoot!
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Hi everyone!
I missed you all and it felt good to read up on everything tonight. What a fantastic group of women we have. How AWESOME!!!! From ginger tea to mouth rinses to our common fantastic voyage, we're all great together. I had a tired day, some anxiety and feeling overwhelmed about getting the cold caps order ready and everything I feel I need to figure out before next Thursday. Underway soon...
7 of 9 and CJSharma are gonna get us all up and moving! Yay! I took a walk this morning at the lake before work and then another brisk walk with a coworker - felt good. Everyone know that people that exercise through chemo do better with less SE? Proven research now...
CODY - How did you do today? What kind of cold caps did you use and how did it go? Yes, I'm using the Cold Caps. I'm getting ready to order them and my hubby watched some videos tonight and he's getting psyched for the project. It'll be his "job" and I think that will be good for him. I'm going to go with Arctic Cold Caps because they are so much less expensive than the Penguin Cold Caps and less complicated. They ship everything in the cooler, they cover the shipping cost and they appear to have a lot of free support on how to do it. We'll be using dry ice. I saw a video today about a hospital back east that offers it to chemo patients and takes care of all the details and the RNs change your caps out. I think this should be common practice. At the time of the video, they had 14 of 15 chemo patients using them and all of them kept their hair.
KSUSAN - "nothing was too miserable for too long" LOVE THAT ONE!
CJ - Sorry about your cat, awwwww....I like the way you are witnessing your process, even the down moods. They too will change. I know for me that any little thing can sometimes throw me into emotions and self-pity. Hey - I had a makeup lesson today on eyebrows! And we found these eyebrow "tattoos" (they only last 2 - 3 days) that you can use eyebrows pencil over or get to match your hair color. They were like $8 bucks. Since I don't have much as far as eyelashes, with wearing glasses I should look the same - its just kinda freaky but as long as I'm breathing...:)/ We also picked out a wig that was an amazing match to my hair - even has strands of gray - so that is my backup. Mouth sores - I heard to use ice chips in your mouth during chemo - same principle as the cold caps.
Hi to everyone else I missed! Thanks for the congrats on the house. I still feel really good about it. Here's to great days tomorrow for all.
Annie
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Hi everyone, getting worn out waiting for my chemo to start tomorrow. I hope that the thinking about it is worse than the actual process of getting it. I will be in the hospital at 7.30 a.m. in order to be out by 11. Not sure how long the actual infusion takes, but I get blood tests beforehand. I will be up at 5.30 a.m. Getting nervous thinking that this whole process brings your immune system way down.
Thanks for the tips Christine and 7of9
How are you today PediGG, Totally Tubu and BilliardMam ?
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CJ I am soo sorry about your cat
Annie I guess the cold caps are different here in Mexico, the kind Im going to use is called dignicap (at least that is what they call them here, I´ll check the makers when i get there) it is a machine with the cap attached, the machine keeps the cap cold and I don't have to change it, the only downside is that I have to stay in the hospital for the extra hours, so I guess I´ll be catching up on some tv series
So i´ts off to chemo, I´ll let you know how it goes.
take care everyone
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Princess - Thank you for the encouraging words!! I like your analogy. I run, and cycle, so I get the "make it to the next stop sign" mentality. One inch at a time. I love that attitude.
7of9 - I usually workout in the morning. So far I've been good for every day with a rest day once a week. Of course, I've been on chemo a week today! Let us know how you're feeling post chemo! I had heard that most people gain weight on chemo, but I seem to be losing. As I am about 40 pounds overweight, I'm liking this side effect.
I'm very active, but I LOVE food. Annie - thanks for the tips on ice chips during chemo - I'll try that. It's only one sore in one cheek and it seems to be healing, so that's good. Nice job on the walk!
Numb - I'll be "in your pocket" tomorrow. I think thinking about it worse than doing. Yes, it does bring you immune system down, but it's actually only for a few days with the shot. My friend who went through this a few years ago is a social worker in an ER/Hospital. She worked through chemo and was in contact with lots of kids and sick people. She was fine, even when her immune system was at it's lowest. Just take precautions - wash your hands frequently, carry hand sanitizer with you, and be cognizant of touching your eyes and mouth while in public.
Cody - thank you! I love that our group is international with Numb in Ireland and you in Mexico. Good luck today!! I'll be in your pocket, too!
Good news - the fog has lifted! If I get 1.5 days of feeling punky every other week, I can handle that. Coffee even tastes amazing this morning, so it appears my sense of taste is back to normal, too. I'm really looking forward to a workout this morning.
I'm even considering lifting today. Yesterday I felt weak taking the trash cans to the curb and they roll! I'll probably just do some kickboxing so I don't push it too much, then the dogs will get a nice walk. 0 -
Numb - I've heard so much that once you start chemo, you are much better. When i find myself worrying about the future SE, I'm going to put one of those freezy cold caps on my brain to stop it! I'm feeling anxiety too with starting next week - and that gives me a sense of overwhelm and tiredness too. I just don't want to give up feeling good but heck, I usually have some kind of complaints - headaches, tired, sore back, irritability, a cold, sinus infection - without a forum like this for support. Sometimes I think about times in my life where I had bad health problems and i think without any support and that makes me feel better about this. its just that it goes on for a long time but we will mark and celebrate and sustain each other over these months. You can do this! its doable and we're together.
CJ - You are amazing, I'm so glad for your coffee today.
CODY - oh wow, that's the way to go with a machine that cools the caps - they will get this tech down. Congrats on your first session. YAY!
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Numb, if you're getting a white cell booster (Neupogen or Neulasta), you may have more white cells during your nadir than you normally would! I still followed instructions and stayed out of crowds and away from nursery schools, but my boosted white counts took care of me--I didn't get any communicable diseases during chemo. This may not be your experience, but I want you to know it's possible.
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I am delighted for you Christine, you had a good week, it's great that your taste is back.
Thanks Annie for the words of comfort, I am fed up anticipating what I am going to be like after the first chemo but I don't have long to wait now and am hoping it won't be too bad.
KSusan I don't get a Neulasta shot the day after chemo the way you do in America. We only get it if our white cells are particularly low. They check for this each time you go to get your infusion. So I don't know which is worse, getting the shot or not getting it. We don't get a port either here unless there is trouble with our veins.
I asked my liaison nurse today about the results of my scans and she just said that she will dig them out and have them for me tomorrow. She then just said that if anything had showed up on them my Chemo Dr. would have gotten the result immediately and I would have been informed. So then I asked her did that mean that because I heard nothing that I am clear and she just said it would appear so. I still won't believe it though until someone is reading the result to me from the report. I kind of think they wouldn't go ahead with the chemo tomorrow without telling me if the cancer had spread, but who knows. Nothing would surprise me.
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Rroses and Agharta, best of luck tomorrow. We are in this together.
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This group is getting big... hard to keep up with everyone.
CJ - sorry about your cat!
Numb - will be thinking of you and wish you the best. Thanks for the support you are giving all of us. I agree, that you could be wearing yourself out with worry. I did the same thing and I think it made everything worse for me that first round. Today, I'm having my best day yet. I feel good, alert, strong, healthy even. I do think staying positive and just figuring out what works for you individually is the best option. Every now and then I keep worrying that this can't be right... I can't feel this good while going through treatment, but I'm going to make the most of it.
Annie - keep us posted on the cold caps. I have no idea what this is, but will have to research it.
Princess - thanks for the motivation!
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Numb, Thank you for your kind wishes. As you said we are in this together and we can do it!!
Since it was my last day before chemo cleanse, my hubby and me went out to eat out. We just spoiled ourselves a little and will end the day watching a movie with coffee ( one last time😜) We did some market shopping and I bought some ginger to make some tea etc.
I love how big this group has become, different people with different backgrounds, ages, countries each walking on the same path together. All my April sisters I love how strong are and I know that we will be standing on the end of this path smiling together.
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LacrosseMam, 7of9 and Cody, hope you had a good day.
I am off to bed now at 8.32 p.m. in Ireland, as I have to be up at 5.00 a.m. tomorrow. I have everything ready to go. Have to say I am a little bit emotional, still can't believe this is happening to me. There are so many women going for chemo each and every month for breast cancer, isn't it a bit scary to think that cancer is so much on the increase. What are we all doing wrong?
I will let you know how I am doing this time tomorrow.
Thanks to all of you for the support.
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Annie - I think once you start chemo you know you have to deal so as long as you are willing to go with the flow, you should be okay. Things will happen, we just know know exactly WHAT will happen, so we tackle them as we can. You guys are my chemosabes - we are all going through this together. I don't know where we're going wrong. I have to think it's an increase in processed foods and sugar, and all of the crap we spray on our foods to keep them "pretty". But who knows. Why is it the more affluent centers of the US for example have higher rates of breast cancer? Marin County, where the median income is outrageous even by Bay Area Standards, is a hot spot.
Numb - thinking of you as you go through chemo! Please check back and let us know how it goes. The chemo will help take care of anything IF it has spread. I'm just a firm believer that doctors love to call you with bad news, and tend to forget to tell with good news.
ARaven - thanks. I'm interested in hearing how the different cold cap options work, too.
Agharta - good luck tomorrow!! I'm still drinking coffee, but there are days it tastes good and days it does not. I can kind of tell now, so if it won't taste good I sub tea. Please check back with your thoughts and experiences.
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ThePrincess - thanks for popping in. It's always good to hear from someone who's been through the whole thing. Yeah, the motto in our house lately has been "one step at a time". It gets too overwhelming to think of all of it at once. It's a lesson in patience, that's for sure.
Numb - wishing you nothing but the best. It is easy to psych ourselves out - too much time to think about what could happen. It really is mind over matter - try to stay as positive as you can. I've found the posts of those who've already started have given me hope. It's not going to be fun, but you can get through it.
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My husband is the Nazi cold capper from hell. Heard that you are supposed to wear the darn thing 4 hours, sitll changing every 30 minutes though we did a anwful of of 10 minute ones in the office as my electric blanket did too good of a job keeping my core warm even with cold feet mittens and gloves. Had a 1:5 app but never got started with actual meds til well after 3. Guess how has 6 more minutes of cold capping....Ugh. Only 1 of 4...3 to go. This had better work.
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Numb, all the best tomorrow shortly maybe I will be in may 2016 Chemo but I hope I won't be doing Chemo doing my Lumpectomy tuesday April 12th can't wait to get it out the way and know my treatment plan.
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Numb - we are all with you, you will be okay. Try to relax and think about lovely things.
7 of 9 - I'm glad that you have your husband to be your cap master. I met a woman on these boards who has finished 5 rounds now, and still has all her hair, except some shedding...but it doesn't sound easy.
Welcome to our new ladies!
Chemosabies away! But OMG I feel so unprepared.
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i am so inspired to see how well you all are doing. Congrats to all of you. I still have two and a half weeks before i start. a part of me just wants to do it already. I need to do two iron infusions before i can start chemo though as i am already severely anemic before all this nonsense began so they want to try and build me up. The good part about waiting two weeks is I will be on a good cycle for me "well weeks". All three of my kids have graduations in June and two have birthdays so I am timed that I will be at the end of week three for all of them.
Went back to the gym today too. Did a whole 15 minutes on the bike, lol. I really need to get back in shape. I was working out 4-5 days a week before the cancer but since my surgery two weeks ago, i just can't get my stregnth back. I think it is more emotional then physical but i figured, if i just get there, Ill get stronger every day. Took a two hour nap after my "tough workout"
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Numb - thinking of you!! Check back when you can.
(I think this is supposed to be HUGS - at least I hope so!)7of9 - He's worried about you. Sweet. (But, yeah, it's annoying). I love that he wants to be a part of your treatment. How are you doing today?
Annie - there's really not that much to prepare for unless you are cold capping. Besides - I thought I ordered a wig, then realized I never really placed the order. YIKES! My hair will start to fall out next week!!
NJNancy - 15 minutes is better than 10 minutes. I get what you mean, but surgery and chemo is tough on the body. You'll get it back. We are all going through a lot emotionally, so it's normal to be depressed and tired. Cancer is SCARY! Really scary! Hugs to you as well
Still feeling good. I have the feeling this will last until my next chemo. I'm okay with that.
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hello everybody, so day one of chemo was yesterday and I´m happy to report my fear was much greater than what it was, of course its uncomfortable, and the cold caps are so weird! (at some point I had ice forming on my scull!) but the nurses and doctors were great, it was painless and I had no reactions to any of the medicines and in my book that is a great outcome.
I also had family visiting and even my oncologyst dropped by, and before i realised it time flew and they were removing my iv and defrosting my head, best feeling ever. when i got home I was a bit tired and pretty bloated, other than that everything was fine.
I hope this helps anyone who was as scared as I was to start this process, I hadn't slept in months and I think I read too many horror stories, I know Im not out of the woods yet but I've decided to just take it one day at a time and try not to worry about how i will feel tomorrow.
Numb I hope yours went really well, and all the other ladies how are starting today best of luck to you!!!
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Cody - glad to hear it went well except for the skull frost! I love your attitude!!
I have an odd question - most of my friends are over the top wanting to help, etc. But I have one friend who is very close to me, who has become oddly distant. I think she just can't handle the idea of me with cancer. It surprises me as she IS one of the strongest women I know. I thought she would weather anything with a shrug. I have other friends who want to cry over me (which is kind of annoying, honestly, but I can handle it). And others who call me strong. I hate that phrase. I have been called "Warrior" before this because I am very protective and will not hesitate to wade into a "fight" to stand up for what I feel is right. But with cancer I'm "strong" because I really don't have a choice. As giving up and crying into my beer is not my style, I'll get through this as best I can, and laugh about it because I'd rather laugh than cry.
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pdrchick,
I will be starting the same exact regime on Monday as well. It seems as though it will be a long day!!! I am attempting cold capping and it seems as tho this will be even more of a long day!!! We will have to keep in contact as our treatment is the same starting on the same day! Are you having six treatments?
Jeri Ann
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Hi everyone and thank you so much for the good wishes. Well I am home about an hour. Got to the hospital about 7.30 a.m., had my bloods checked, waited an hour for the result to come back, but was sitting in a comfortable armchair eating tea and toast so didn't noticed the time going by. The I had anti nausea medication in a drip and steroids, this took the best part of another hour. In the meantime I was being asked questions about my health, and any worries I had etc. That was all fine.
Then I asked how my scans went last week and I was told the results were there but they would have to get a Dr. to discuss them with me so I immediately got nervous. The Dr. then came around and said that while they were mostly good the ct scan showed a thickening of the skin in my oesophagus and I would need a camera down my throat to investigate that. I was having indigestion a lot, but I have a small hiatus hernia and I had a scope about 5 years ago and it was clear. He said they may do a biopsy on it to see what it is. "Biopsy", that word scares the hell out of me. Anyway discussed it with the nurse after that and she said that from the wording of that result she doesn't think it is anything to worry about e.g. "you may need to have a scope", not "you will definitely need to have a scope". She also thinks that because they have no access to the scope I had 5 years ago that they are probably just seeing the hiatus hernia and anything that shows up on a ct scan has to be investigated. I will get it done and hope for the best.........as if I haven't enough to worry about. This will be scheduled for the 3rd week after this chemo so that my bloods will have improved by then.
When I came out of the hospital this morning I just felt a bit woozy, like I had drunk a glass of wine, but wasn't tipsy. Then we went for lunch and by then I felt normal. I am drinking water now and the hubby is gone down to the pharmacy to get the medication for any side effects I may have.
I met a woman in the waiting room this morning and she had breast cancer 44 years ago, and this would have been when the treatment wasn't as good as it is today, and she was still smiling. She has Hodgkin's lymphoma now and was getting chemo for that and she had open heart surgery 2 years ago. She certainly put me in my place.
So far so good, fingers crossed.
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cjsharma,
I think the friend thing is difficult. My friends are super supportive, but things are just different. We used to have a pretty active social life. Now that has come to a halt as I have quit drinking since my diagnosis....it is hard for anyone to relate. I know I need to try to make my life more like it used to be...but it is just so different. My thoughts are on maintaining my health. Do you think we ever get back to any normal?
Jeri Ann
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Numb - glad to hear you are doing well! Breast Cancer 44 years ago and she's still here! This IS encouraging! Good for her. I'm glad you met her, and I hope she helps with some of your nervousness. This IS survivable. I have a lot of friends who are survivors. It's just scary.
Jeri Ann - I think we will get back to normal, but it will be a new normal. I'm still social drinking, but I'm limiting to one night a week, and limited quantities. As my friends older, this works well. You can still go out, but drink sparkling water with lime - and that's if you wish. I get the idea of maintaining your health. It's so important. I'm having a group of friends over to "Celebrate Life" - no sadness allowed. I'm just going to serve pizza and if people want to drink they can bring their own. Very casual - drop in/out as you wish. Stops at 9 because I kind of stop at 9 any more
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Just wanted to chime in from the Jan chemo thread. I just had #7 out of 8 treatments. 4 dose dense AC and 4 dose dense Taxol. When it first began did not think I would ever get to this point.
I've done reasonably well. I've had some down days, but not many. None where I was totally out of it, except for my 6 day hospital stay due to blood pressure spiked by AC (no problems with it prior). I've always maintained a healthy weight, clean eating etc, and have had no problems since, with, low blood levels etc. I've made it to events, cooked, out to dinner with friends and hubby.
My tip: hydrate, no matter what. Move around and walk no matter what. For me, it made a difference. Also, tell your MO about any SE that is bothersome, they need to know.
I kept my fingernails, I feel due to nail strengthener and dark polish. Eyebrows are biting the dust. But I had really thick ones. Hair on my head is growing back on Taxol.
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CJSharma, love your idea. My friends have brought ladies night out to my house. We mix up drinks, snacks, when my taste buds are gone (they are now after infusion) they bring ice cream. It means a lot to keep some sort of routine. I've been able to go out a few of the times, but now they like hanging out with me.
I survived this once 24 years ago (this is a new cancer) and I will again. Treatment is so much better and varied.
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