January 2017 Surgery Group
Comments
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2Moveforward - I am in the same situation...same size, mastectomy - I was told that chemo is "preventative"...to absolutely ensure no cells were either left behind (there is still a small amt of breast tissue) or anywhere else in the body. Here in Ontario it is standard practice in particular for anyone who is pre-menopausal. It must be upsetting if you were under the assumption that you wouldn't need it, but remember they are doing everything possible to ensure a. it's GONE, and b. it doesn't come back. That's the most important thing!
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2moveforward: I'm waiting to hear if I'm going to need chemo. I hope not but I'll do it if it will increase my chances of survival. What's the point of the mastectomies otherwise, right? A lot of the gals had chemo before surgery & they will help us through it! It's great your lymph nodes are clear!
Do you have your pathology report?
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DSMom! You are so right! Your story really lifted me up. Thanks for sharing your great perspective
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Happy Birthday 3Bears!
Welcome 2moveforward! A bunch of great ladies here that will support you all the way.
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Dsmom-- thank you for your encouraging words. It is very hard knowing and seeing what happened to our chests but you are so right! I know many people who would trade places with me in a heartbeat. People who have stage 4 colon cancer, or strokes or heart attacks. We are still alive and enjoying our families. That's the most important.Annoyingboob!! Thank you so much for that beautiful cake! That made me so happy.
PugsMama thank youfor the bday wishes. And for the tv watching marital advice. He's a good husband, I know he's not going anywhwere. I might just like this new freedom that I'm allowing myself to watch my own tv for the first time in decades really. This will actually probably be good for us.
Thank you all for loving me just as I am. We are all "misfit toys" right now. But there is a beauty within us.
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good morning January 2017 warriors - second to reading the latest posts carefully, i patted away the tears reading responses to my dark blue note. grateful tears. i've been dealing w mental illness for a lot of years and have found that, like this new fresh hell that is bc, even one's family and closest of friends may not be able to share either journey with me, nor would i expect them to, or necessarily even want them to.
i've been encouraged thru the years to find a support group for what i like to call brain cooties (h/t Jerrod Poore of CrazyMeds.org) and was never for a moment interested for whatever reason. Getting the news for bc is a wholly different animal and i'm really gobsmacked to find this specific, bite-sized group of brave, smart, vibrant & witty wimmins.
You guys are brilliant! i'll be under my bedcovers,tapping the iGizmo, listening carefully. god bless.
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Just got back from the store getting some things for after surgery like hard candy, etc. Wouldn't you know it, I found myself busy Moosetracks! LOL
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You guys - how much more can one person take? As my daughter and I were watching church online this morning, our beloved labrador of nine years suddenly died. We are broken. He was fine, playing with our new puppy just this morning. I can't even believe it. Plus, my husband and son had left to ski for the weekend since my surgery had been rescheduled so we are here alone trying to deal with it. One of our friends is going to come take him to be cremated, but we are completely heartbroken. He was such a good dog and companion. I can't believe he's gone.
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DCISinAZ: so so sorry for your loss. I've had dogs my whole life& I know how heartbreaking it is to lose such a beloved family member...
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for all you nipplesparing mastectomy women: I'm not seeing my ps till next week, and I have questions: it seems to me once you take out the breast tissue, you could just slip an implant into that prepectoral space, lay the skin over it, and be done. I don't understand the te to implant need. Is anyone 'direct to implant'? I'm super interested in the prepectoral nipple sparing implant route, but if that is going to turn into some big ordeal, maybe I'd do nipple sparing mx and just stay flat. I'm open to any and all opinions.
Ps, I watched some YouTube of tg notaro last night and stayed up late laughing hard!
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dcis, I just saw your post and my stomach sank. I lost one of my babies this summer, and she was only 6! I'm so sorry for you and your family, but at least it was quick and you were there. Good luck moving forward.
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I am so incredibly sorry DCISinAZ. Words are inadequate. Our furry babies have such a special place in our heart. Our dear Maggie passed away suddenly the same way two years ago and I know how hard it is. Just know that your baby crossed rainbow bridge and is going to looking out for you from above as you go through this BC BS (it's official title in my home.)
Gentle hugs to you and your family.
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Hi everyone. I'm really hoping I'll get my surgery date tomorrow but just realized it's MLK day. Do doctors normally take that as a holiday? I hate how it sounds to say that I hope mine is open. It's not out of disrespect - it's completely selfish as I feel like this process is just torture. I've had a really down weekend despite running a 5K yesterday and going to meditation today. I just see all my friends and family living their life and it's like I am on the outside looking in, just wondering when do I get to step back into life without constantly thinking about this tumor that's trying to take my life. Sorry to be so morbid - it's just how I'm feeling.
I went over my MRI report today and it showed a secondary spot. My dr told me that there was something else there but seeing it in the written report just made it so much more real. I can't believe that report is about me - my body. I keep thinking "what if they got it wrong - what if they call and say they made a mistake" I know I'm in denial but geez.
Then - to top everything - I went on a bit of a cleaning jag and found my "clean mammo report" from November 11, 2015. How the hell did I go from nothing to a 3.5 cm mass in one year?! Just mind-boggling. It's like a cruel joke to see that report. I had no idea what was lurking in my cells.
So sorry to vent - i know many of you lovely ladies are battling the same things and I hate to bring you down with my thoughts. It's just that this is a safe space where I know you relate. I can't have this conversation with friends and family - they try too hard to be positive and pump me up. Sometimes I just don't need that.
Anyway...thank you all for being here. I'm going to go eat some ice cream. I bought some Ben and Jerry's. I always try to stay healthy and eat clean but I'm ready to clean that tub out! I thought about Moose Tracks after reading the other posts...I'm just more of a caramel girl.
Blessings and peace to all
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Shelleybeans. We all know exactly how you feel. I found out 2 days before Thanksgiving. I felt like I was going through the motions of the holidays. I am so thankful that I am having my surgery on Tuesday and hopefully get my Oncotype DX score soon so I can find out if I need chemo. I just want to know so I can get on with my life. The hardest part is waiting. Praying for peace for you
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totally with you on the denial. my early jan surgery went well, and i was seeing the results and feeling like, 'ok, that wasnt so bad, lets get back to life now', but then I remember they still recommend that I have xrt and tamoxifen or else do a bmx. ugh. i cant even imagine tossing chemo into the mix!! the way they just draw everything out into months upon months of agony and appts and research and opinions. so I was enjoying my little 1 week break of feeling kinda normal, but im sucked back in with ro and mo and ps appts which are for sure going to get my head spinning and my wallet aching. if I was the king of breast cancer, I would make it so they could accurately diagnose, chop off, and put back together everything in 3 visits max all within a month.
sigh, I bought ice cream sandwiches today too...
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i am so with you girls on this topic of denial , in and out of the BC reality. Its a rollercoaster ride! It is coming here and relating to all of genuine emotions that help me so much . Everyone is so open , candid and real in sharing their experiences. Without this place to come to, I would know half of what was going on and would definitely be in major denial. It can't be happening to me!! I was out today enjoying sometime with my grandson , minigolf , arcade games and gokarts. As I stood in line , I thought .. look at all these people who don't have to worry about having a decease like this and don't have to worry about a thing. Happily living life! Of course that is irrational , I know nothing of any one else'sstruggles . I was feeling sorry for myself! I hate to feel that way! But my mind is in overload these days! Thank you all for being so kind and compassionate. It has helped me so much.
DCISinAZ I am so sorry about your pup. I have a 13 yr old min pin with Congestive heart failure and I worry about him every minute . He is so weak .The sudden death of your pup has to weigh heavy . Sending you love❤
Thanks for letting me ramble ladies .❤🙏'S👍💕
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Annoyingboob - I'd nominate you for king or queen of BC for sure. I'm in denial on the chemo. They've basically told me to expect it - just can't go there - I lack the mind-space to throw that in the mix. Sigh...Enjoy the ice cream. We should all be eating them on the beach. I'm in FL and it's in the 80's all week.
Cowboy-up - thank you. I will be praying hard for you on Tuesday. Hope your scores come out well!
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Just joining in on this group. Was diagnosed back in August at age 33 (now 34) after finding a lump while in the shower. Had some eggs harvested before starting chemo in September. Finished up chemo on Jan 5 (Woo hoo! And I finally got a little hair starting to grow back
) and my surgery has been scheduled for Jan 31st. I have the BRCA1 gene so no choice there, everything must go. Bilateral Mastecomy with reconstruction (tissue expanders). The breast surgeon said he would try to save my left nipple but it will all depend on what he sees when he gets in there. Question from the Plastic Surgeon was do I want the right nipple saved if they can't save the left. Having a hard time deciding what to do, I keep going back and forth on the decision. Part of me wants to hold on to some of what was there, I feel like I'm losing so much already between this surgery and having my ovaries removed sometime later this year. But another part of me thinks a matched set is the better way to go...Guess I have a couple more weeks to debate this out.
Definitely nervous, I've never had any surgery before but I can't wait for all of this to be over so I can get on with my life.
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Long live annoyingboob! King of BC...huzzah!!
Iraystar: welcome & congrats on finishing chemo! Some of us who didn't have treatment before surgery are anxiously awaiting if that's going to be part of out treatment plan...good luck with the nipple decision. My reconstruction decisions drove me nuts! My personal nipple decision was they both stay or they both go...ended up not being able to keep 'em anyway so that was that...
The apprehension is the worst part! Many of us (myself included) felt a tremendous sense of relief when it was over. You just close your eyes, wake up & are so happy to get that cancer out of your body!
I had my ovaries out a while ago. Make sure they use the da Vinci robot method when you are ready for that surgery. Couple of teeny holes & you'll be up & about in no time...
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Welcome Iraystar8166 - on the nipple, my PS said that I was a 50/50 but he felt that those who were least happy with the results were the ones that weren't matched. They might not both be "looking at you" so for me, I just decided I'm done with them so take them. I had a lot of apprehension at first but after we talked about it, I just didn't want to make yet another decision. He started explaining the whole grafting process to recreate them and I told him to save his breath. I'll get tattoos. When I'm done I'm not having another surgery - I'm done. Plus, I've never had a tattoo and never thought I would get one so I may go a little wild. I figure if I want a rose vine on my breasts I darn well earned it!
So that's my 2 cents on nipples!
Good luck as you make the decision.
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DCIS inAZ- I am so sorry for your the loss of your sweet furry friend so suddenly. I am glad you were there with him. My girls have been such a comfort to me during this ordeal and the many sleepless nights in the recliner. I cannot not imagine dealing with BC and losing such an important part of the family. Glad you have the new puppy which I hope will help lessen the pain slightly.
Annoyingboob-Many surgeons are doing pre pectoral direct to implant placement at the same time of nipple/skin sparing BMX with very good results cosmetically and with less pain and healing time. It is a fairly newer procedure so not widely available but def worth looking into. I ended up having a 2 week delay between my NS BMX and direct to implant placement due to having previous radiation 10 yrs ago. The rationale for waiting between the surgeries was to see if my previously radiated skin would heal well enough to tolerate an implant. So far things appear to be healing well and I will have the implant surgery on 1/20. My nipples are not in great shape but the PS seems to think they will survive. The remaining skin looks great. PM me if you'd like any more info.
Welcome to all of the newcomers. I'm sorry that you have had to join us but you will find so much support here to get you through this.
I know that many of you have received pathology results after surgery that were worse than what was expected pre op. I am so sorry that you now once again find yourselves waiting for consultations and answers to help make additional treatment choices. You are a strong bunch and will no doubt get through this and do everything you can to avoid this crap ever again.
Hope you all have a good week and best wishes to all of those with upcoming surgeries.
When fear and anxiety creep in...go to the bungalows!
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lraystar8166 - Welcome to the group we all wish we had no reason to join! I am sorry that you have had to go through all of this at such a young age, but glad to hear that you were pro-active! Also happy that you have made your way through the majority of your treatment! Surgery can be very scary, but there are so many ladies that can support you through it and answer your questions (from a patient's point of view).
DCIS inAZ- I am so so sorry to hear about your puppy! Our's is getting up there in age and I worry that my boys will get up one morning and find him passed away.
Shelleybeans - I hope that you are able to get your surgery date! I felt like the wait was so long to see my BS (it was over the holiday) and then the PS (as I was hoping for a BMX). Luckily I had scheduled my lumpectomy, just in case and only had 2 days in between the last appt where the decision was made and the surgery. If the Drs see anything unusual in any of your tests or scans, they will have you do another scan...I had a spot on my liver that led to a CT and a follow up CT in another month. They don't believe it to be anything, but I am glad they follow up as I would rather catch anything suspicious right away.
Elem - I know exactly what you mean about where your thoughts go when you are around other people and how your life has changed with your diagnosis. I think that one of the main things is that people assume that after chemo & surgery, you have nothing else to do with the cancer...you are just cured and should get on with your life. In reality, I have an oncologist that I will see every year for the next decade, mammograms every 6mo-yr and the freaking out of the waiting period after each and every one, and will get scared to death with worry with each new pain or period of not feeling well.
3Bears - I hope that you had a FANTASTIC birthday! I got my dx 2 weeks before my birthday and didn't really celebrate it, but I sure plan on celebrating this year as I will be done with almost everything (I will have one more Herceptin and then port removal just after).
Annoyingboob- For me the Drs said chemo first (I am triple positive), then surgery & radiation (if MX, no radiation needed) and sometime during radiation,I would start tamoxifen. I just got my referral for the RO and will call this week to make an appt but most likely not start until 4 weeks post-surgery. One of my bc friends had nipple/skin sparring BMX with immediate reconstruction and she was thrilled with the outcome.
Now I have to go pick up some ice cream!
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Dsmom - thanks for sharing your story about your cousin. I was worried because of the risk of chemo putting you into early menopause or damaging ovaries, but it's so nice to hear a story of someone still having a smooth pregnancy after cancer. Your story about your other family members was so helpful too. I have to keep that mindset...it's like..it sounds so scary to say 'I have cancer' but at least it is as treatable as it is.
happy birthday 3bears!!
annoyingboob - yaay glad you liked Tig!! I'm having a nipple-sparing mastectomy, with allograft tissue to hold in the implant, it's tissue from a cadaver. My PS said I was a good candidate for it. I am fairly small-breasted. As far as I understand it they will be able to insert the implant over the pectoral muscle and then it gets held up with the allograft flap that they sew in. it seems like it should be easy enough. I'm not sure in what cases they have to do TE, maybe if more skin needs to be removed or if there is a size change? it would be worth asking your PS about the differences!
edge_of_no_return We are so glad you're here with us in this awesome group and that you're finding some comfort.
DCISinAZ - I am so, so sorry for your loss. I feel for you and I'm so sorry. Just wish we could all be there to give you a hug.
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Pugsmama, any serenity I have probably comes from my age and my faith. Saw a quote on Facebook the day I went for first biopsy that I thought was good and I decided to claim it..."My faith is greater than my fear." Had nothing to do with breast cancer but thought it was good. Also at the age of 74 (75 in March), I could say I am on borrowed time so this is just a bumpy road on my journey for now. Do not know how any of you got to this point in your lives that you learned you had breast cancer but I am only here because my insurance company called me last September and asked how long it had been since I had a mammogram and would I like for them to set one up for me. I have been very negligent in getting mammograms for at least the last 4-5 years so seized the opportunity to take care of it. Because of that phone call, which I do not believe was coincidence, I am writing in this site tonight. Were it not for that call, my outcome/prognosis could be totally different. I do consider myself a young 74 year old and I enjoy life very much. I am so grateful for this site and I hope this experience will provide me with the opportunity to be an encouragement to someone else down the road. Each one of these ladies is remarkable. We have so much in common making this a place to easily relate our feelings and concerns and get feedback to help us know what we are facing down the road.
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Thank you for writing down your thoughts here goingon75. You are truly an inspiration . I love your lust for life and the the fact that you are definitely encouraging by sharing your story. I also neglected to get a mammogram , but not by 4 or 5 yrs. I always ignored them. I am 61.Right after my birthday in Nov . I got that robo call from my insurance company about my missing an important screening.The mammogram ! I don't know why, but for some reason , I decided I should schedule it. By Dec. I got in and had it done. My fear of a mammogram being painful was unfounded , it was a cinch.I felt so stupid! Then hrs later a call about something looking suspicious and need another mammogram was ordered to see if it is a problem . Well evidently , the calcifications seen on the left needed further evaluation. Thus stereotactic biopsy , which did hurt, was ordered and from there a dx. Of DCIS and now a second surgery scheduled jan. 26. For SNB ! So I feel this could have been much worse had I not listened to that inner voice telling me to schedule the mammogram.0 -
DCISinAz, so sorry about your dog. It's hard enough when one of our pets dies, but when it happens at the same time as a cancer diagnosis...there are no words.
SheilaW8, I also have a black area on the top of a nipple and I'm wondering what's going to happen with it.
Cowboy-up, don't get too stressed about your surgery estimate (as long as your hospital and your surgeon and your anesthesiologist are all in network). Their estimates don't take into account the out of pocket max, they do that when they get the actual bill. Just don't pay over any more than your insurance max. My hospital just sent me a bill for $55,000 for my last 2 chemos - way over my out of pocket max, and when I called to complain, they said that was a "discounted" rate (actual bill was $200,000). Told them to send it to the insurance.
Annoyingboob, you're so right about how everything drags out into months and months. I think for me it will be 18 months by the time I finish and I'm prone to sudden outbursts of tears when I see how everyone's moved on with their life while my ordeal just keeps getting worse. At the end of it I will have to look for a job and I'm dreading the question about why the 18 month gap in my resume.
I do feel lucky to be here, because they don't do mammos for women under 40 and they couldn't feel any of my lumps. I had my first (and last) mammo AFTER I had been diagnosed with breast cancer. I owe my life to a dermatologist who thought a bit of flaky skin on the nipple was worthy of a biopsy. At first they thought it was a very small cancer and chemo had never occurred to me until they dropped the bombshell that the cancer was to extensive to operate and chemo was my only option.
Earlier today I was filling in an online registration for a new doctors office and it asked for my insurance details. As my husband is the insured person I put in his name and then there's a field for "relationship to patient". So you have all the normal options, spouse, child, significant other, etc and then one of the options is..."cadaver donor"!!! I just laughed. Then I had to put in my surgery history and it wouldn't allow more than 5 surgeries, but I've had 6, so I laughed again...
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for the girls headed back to work this week:
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Good morning ladies!
To the 3 going to surgeon this morning...thinking of you sending vibes of peace and uneventful day. Hope you are all home soon and check in when you can. Cocktails will be at the bat when you arrive.
Welcome to the new girls. This group keeps me going. The support, the laughter plus the unconditional love that we share with ladies we only know by diagnosis and code names is pretty amazing. Which I wasn't to original with my name...duh it would be so easy to figure out who I am if anyone I actually know looks there or if the FB page posts any of this blog.
DCISinAZ- so sorry about your furbaby! Pets are family to! (((((Hugs))))))
Maya15- for your gap in your resume. You took the time off to care for a very close family member while they were recovering from an extended illness. So much truth in that!
Goingon75- I LOVE your quote! My faith is strong! Thank you for sharing. That will help keep me focused on my faith. We all have been programmed to fear. The media keeps that instilled in us.
Annoyingboob- as PugsMama put it...YES ...long live Annoyingboob as King of BC!
Cowboy-up- DANG! Those medical expenses! I got a bill after my ultrasound for close to $500. I couldn't believe it so I calles...nope ot was right that was my part. They did discout it to $387.50 since I paid it in full. That was for the first ulira sound that came back all clear. I was told your good keep your regular mammogram. Which was in 2 months. Go for mammogram get a call I need an ultra sound! I've already had one! It was clear! No...it's a different area. That ultra sound didn't do the whole breast just that are of concern and that area is fine. So here we go! I've had another ultrasound, 2 mammograms and a 3D mammogram plus the biopsies. I'm afraid to check the mail at this point! No bills yet but I know they are coming!
Its another rainy day here. I have the need to clean and organize. While cooking dinner last night I blew the leaves out of the carport, blew the driveway off and mopped my breezeway and area in front of the front door. If everything is clean and organized I look like I have my shit together right?
Have a beautiful day ladies! If you are returning to work today...good luck and the force is with you! ( that's us!)
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Good morning to all! I managed to stay away from this thread from Friday night until Sunday night, and that was good in a way, but I definitely missed hearing what was going on with all of you.
Today's women: Laastra, tennischick888 and lovesgreenthings, sending you calm thoughts. You can do this.
I saw some new names, welcome to all of you. Edgeofnowhere, can I call you eon? It's easier to type.
Leftcoastie, good luck with your drain removal on Tuesday.
Annoyingboob: congrats on your shower, and thanks for the path to the cabins pic. I am a scuba diver so tomorrow while the surgeon thinks I am unconscious, I will be out cruising around some shallow reefs (that's what those dark areas are on the first cabin pic). Then I am going to swim back, climb out of the water onto that path and I will see you ladies at the bar. Still hoping for a handsome recovery room nurse so I can babble all this stuff about cabins, reef fish and blue water to him while I am coming out of anesthesia!
DCISinAZ, sorry about your surgery delay but an ill plastic surgeon doesn't sound good at all. And your dog too. Arg, what a week.
I saw some discussion about DCIS above so just wanted to chime in that I was told for my particular DCIS that if I chose lumpectomy there would be 25 or 35(?), 5 days/wk for x weeks radiation treatments and 5 years of tamoxifen. I am 50 years old. Just throwing that data into the mix for you guys, I know everybody's diagnosis is different.
2moveforward, congrats on no nodes but sorry to hear you will have to do chemo. Pugsmama and all the others starting or waiting to hear about chemo, smack those little cancer cells down!
I think it was shellybeans who found her clean mammo report from before. Yeah, I have one from May 2016 marked as calcifications, non-suspicious. If I find that thing around here I swear I'm going to burn it.
And my tomorrow sisters: Did-not-see-this-coming, zookeeper, cowboy-up, and GT1965, here we go. I'm going to get out of the house and run some errands today. Remember to ask whether you can have anti-nausea meds with your anesthesia if you want them, I am having them.
I will be back later today to check in. Had a meltdown on my husband last night, poor wonderful man.
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Hi Ladies!
A whole day without you all and I've missed so much! The hubs called me into the kitchen yesterday morning and thought that I've been a little consumed again by all things "cancer" and suggested a days break for my soul. Since he was making me blueberry pancakes and since I knew he was right, I could hardly argue. My thoughts were with you all day but my mind did need a bit of a break. Our big outing was to a Fry's Marketplace (grocery store) that opened near our home on Friday. The place was so packed, my anxiety was worse than staying home researching cancer stuff!!
First business, best of luck to all the lovely ladies going in for surgery today. You got this and you got us and a bungalow with your name on it!
DCISinAZ, I'm just so sorry. I know that kind of heartbreak all to well and I can't imagine adding to the pile of stuff you have on your plate at the moment. Words are not sufficient but please know I'm thinking of you. Hugs my friend.
I saw some new names in our amazing group here...warmest welcome to all.
3bears, a belated happy birthday!!
I'm back at work today and I cannot even believe it. I was so not ready for this...I am thankful I won't see many people today since it's a holiday and many will be home with their school aged children. The only visitor I've had came in all peppy and told me to look at how many boxes I've already checked off in this journey and while I adore her and her sentiments...they just don't get it the same as you ladies. After the surgery I felt like I should be done but a 2.5 hour meeting on my radiation choices on Friday snapped me back to reality and it's been a few tough days since then.
I guess I should get myself a little caught up here in the office. Boo hoo.
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