January 2017 Surgery Group
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Hello my friends, taking a break from working at home. I feel like I'm just slogging through & it's taking me forever to do anything! My neurons are not firing on all cylinders yet...OMG!
Leftcoastie: Sunday was that kind of day for me.I never even got out of bed. Flatlined, I call it. Didn't take any calls because I didn't want to have to "fake" a positive attitude on the phone. So I went with it and felt a little better the next day. I think we all have to expect that it's not going to be smooth sailing for us mentally every day. The amount of stress associated with this diagnosis is beyond what my coping skills can keep up with sometimes! I read that article about PTSD too! Makes a lot of sense...maybe that's why I'm having such a hard time concentrating..
Annoyingboob: Thanks so much for the tip about the panty liners. I took my first shower today (whoo hoo!) and the PS said to put on some ointment he prescribed & band aids on top of the holes where the drains were until they close up. Well, you and I know how much band aids are a no no, so I found some panty liners in the closet & stuck them to the inside of my bra! Perfect!
DCISinAZ: I have a lot of mobility. The most difficult thing at first was putting pressure on my arms to get myself up or on or off the bed (if that makes sense). The only restriction I had was not lifting anything heavy or lifting my arms straight up over my head. Other than that, it hasn't been a challenge for me at all. I was off pain meds by the time I got home the next day (I was only taking Tylenol) so I wasn't woozy or anything like that & totally able to walk around the house without any help....
Shellybeans: Am sending you a private message re: pre-pectoral implant research which you may wish to share with your PS.
An encouraging thought: My mom was dx at 58 with BC, now she's 82 & never had a recurrence. She looks at that time as a blip in her life, & rarely, if ever, thinks about it and assures me it will be the same for me sooner rather than later....it's hard to believe I'll ever get to that mindset but time heals all wounds (pun intended!)
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Hi, all -- I'll be having my BMX with reconstruction (tissue expanders) on 24 January... had a lumpectomy in December, but margins were not clean... here we go again. Feeling my first bout of nerves/emotions this time around... last time felt like all business, but with less than a week to go before surgery am feeling down and worried that my 'silver lining' (new, smaller and perpetually perky boobs!) is nothing of the sort. Probably just a down day... any suggestions? How are those of you who've already gone through the surgery feel now that you are on the other side?
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Just getting around to posting. I had a rough go of it. Surgery was delayed an hour so didn't start until after 2. My marker clip came up missing which had only happened twice to this surgeon. Thank goodness I had a hemotoma that also marked the spot. Had to take larger margins due to this. Horrible nausea afterwards even though he supposedly game me the drugs. So had to stay the night. Today my oxygen was low and my heart rate was high so I had to have a CAT scan to make sure I didn't have a blood clot in my lung. I didn't sonow I am waiting to be released. So exhausted.
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dcbc: I guess everyone who has a lumpectomy realizes that a mastectomy may (but hopefully not) be in their future, but not so soon! You're not the only one in our group that this has happened to..here's a little perspective from someone only two weeks post-surgery to the day: I had a shower today and my boobs actually don't look too bad. I didn't have nipple sparing and when I say I've got scars, I'm not kidding...but, the shape is OK and if you just look at implant reconstruction as internal prostheses, basically saving you the hassle of having to use external ones, you'll be OK with it. Many of us had a farewell for our boobs, took pictures- including me, but once they were gone, I was so happy to get that cancer out of my body and it was a tremendous relief. All of the pre-surgery anxiety had been lifted and even though I'm in the process of getting "internal prostheses", at the end of it, I think they'll be OK....good enough, and probably better than good enough. What I'm pleasantly surprised over is how quickly I'm adjusting to this "new normal" which is my body, scars and all. And you will too....
Cowboy-Up: So happy to hear you didn't have a blood clot in your lung. I can't even imagine what a hospital stay that was! Rest up & meet us in the cabana for a huge drink!
DCSinAZ: Will be thinking of you tomorrow - you've got this!
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PugsMama, Thanks for such a quick reply! My breasts are so big for my frame, that I've always wanted smaller ones... but saying goodbye entirely is something I hadn't anticipated feeling bad about. I think it will pass... It would be weird not to have some emotional bouts during this whole thing! Would love to hear how you said goodbye!! Taking pictures sounds like a good idea... maybe toasting them over cocktails with my girlfriends... any other ideas? I'll have two different shaped scars due to lumpectomy scar on the left... and don't think either will be nipple sparing, so imagine tattoos are in my future at some point... but for now, just dealing with the goodbye.
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Jinmo - excellent report and good to hear from you! sounds like you are recovering nicely! I found the SNB painful too and hope I don't have to do that again. Now more waiting! I had 4 nodes removed. Positive thoughts, positive thoughts.
BeachBabyK - for me, I think it was better to stop the pain meds asap b/c it was easier to overdo it because I had no pain. I had more bleeding under my arm probably from pushing myself out of my chair and didn't notice it until today.
Cowboy-Up - OMG. If anyone deserves a trip to the Cabana, it's you! So sorry your surgery didn't go more smoothly. Sure hope it gets better now that you are heading home
Again, thanks for much appreciated advice and experiences
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dcbc is looking for ideas for a "bye bye boobs" party:
I love the idea of cocktails with girlfriends as you toast your "girls." I took pictures and I have to say, my image of my boobs in my mind were a lot better than how they looked in the picture! Maybe it was the angle...but I crack up now just thinking about it!
Maybe annoyingboob will share where her boob picture ended up! LOL
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Thank you so much for all your wonderful advice regarding mastectomy or lumpectomy!!!
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I can't even tell you how happy i get when the surgery girls checkin. im so sorry, cowboy, that it was a rough ride, especially since i had been reassuring you it would all be ok. im glad you didn't have a pe. give in to the exhaustion and just sleep. i hope your recovery continues to get better each day.
dcbc, i had a lumpectomy with reduction/lift at the beginning of the month, and like you, had boobs too big for my frame. or maybe i was just fat,lol. im loving these smaller new perky boobs - i could even go smaller and be happy, but im not going to get too attached bc im leaning towards a bmx just to get them done and not worry anymore or take pills for 5 years. now that the cancer is out, im in my honeymoon phase and was thinking i might just enjoy these new girls for a few months or even a year before chopping them all off. the one thing im concerned about if i wait is....donald trump. gah. if my boobs become a preexisting condition, then maybe if i delay surgery it will be difficult to get insurance. ill talk it over with my team -i have all kinds of onc and ps appts this week and next.
jinmo, i admire your decision. i tend to favor simplicity, and the idea of a mx and no recon is appealing on so many levels. how did you finally decide on that course?
i do love hearing everyones different journeys. and i second the notion of taking it really easy for 2 weeks post op, even if you are feeling really good. i was considering myself back to normal and living my life until leftie decided she was not done with healing and decided to blow up like a balloon. if i followed directions, she would prolly be doing better. i was told its ok to walk and hike, which i did. i guess im using my upper body more than i thought. pugs mama - how do you deal with your dogs? im thinking maybe my dog pulling on the leash did me in. glad the pantyliners are an option. i also found these big gauze pads in my closet that are even better bc just 1 covers my whole breast, and i can tuck it into the bra without any tape.
its raining again here today which i love bc im not working today and, like all of you, just need a netflix and chill type of afternoon. i do think the exhaustion catches up to you at about 2 weeks post op. you realize you are ok. you accept that you have a new normal. you know are safe, so then you just want to sleep. and eat. i took a break from ice cream yesterday and ate an entire chunk of tillamook aged mild cheddar cheese. i think my new udders have me craving all milk products, lol!!!
xx
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Annoyingboob -- I hear ya re: Trump... hope your insurance isn't completely vulnerable to changes in ACA... hoping they are all too incompetent to do too much harm, but may be wishful thinking. I live in DC, and am NOT looking forward to this weekend.... but it is my last before the BMX, so will be out their marching... maybe that will be the best kind of goodbye for these aging (52 years) 36Fs... a last nasty woman hooray for them before they retire.
God luck with your decision, and enjoy the smaller, perkier pair as long as you keep them!
PugsMama, thanks for all your responses! Glad to hear after only 2 weeks in you are feeling better and can already appreciate the 'new you'..
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DCIS in AZ, good luck tomorrow. There'll be plenty of good seats waiting for you on the cabana deck when you get back.
jinmo
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dcbc - maybe you could knit little 'pussyhats', one for each boob and one on your head, and take pictures, just to honor the inauguration?! https://www.pussyhatproject.com or if you have leftover xmas stuff lying around, put a stocking on each one or cover them in lights and give it to your dh next year for xmas? or cover them in valentine hearts?
or, you might not have time for this, but there is a photographer around here who does really classy boudoir nude photos. hair, makeup, the works. if i had loved my boobs, i would have done something like that. but i wasn't sad at all to get rid of those big lazy lumps. i am grateful to cancer to motivate me to get rid of them, and wish i had done a reduction ages ago.
dcis - good luck!! you tell that ps that he owes you an eye lift for sure!!
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LOLOL Annyoingboob!!! Great ideas... I'll have a (black, not pink) pussyhat for Saturday, am marching with one of my best college friends who is many-years cancer-free after lumpectomy/radiation/chemo... she is joining me from Ohio and is bringing the hats. Will tell. Her about your idea...
Can't wait to catch up with her and get her take on the whole BC thing0 -
DCBC: I'll be looking for you on TV - won't be hard to miss those 36Fs!
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annoyingboob, thanks for asking about my decision process. I spent about six weeks deciding but here's the basics:
1. DCIS can't be seen in surgery because it is microscopic. Therefore, the first lumpectomy is kind of a "scoop and hope".
2. I had small breasts, so if it had gone to a second lumpectomy, which happens about 20% of the time, it would have been a mastectomy for me anyway since I would not have much tissue left. Here's the link to the 20%: http://www.breastcancer.org/research-news/20120718
3. I did not want to have only one breast, so if I was going for one, I decided I was going for two.
4. I did not want to do the radiation treatments and five years of Tamox, which is what they had planned if I did lumpectomy only.
5. I buy my insurance through the ACA, so I am determined to get this over with in 2017. I think 2018 is not going to hold a lot of good insurance news for self-employed people like me. So, no reconstruction since that tends to be a long process. No unilateral because I might not be able to afford the second surgery in a later year. Getting my recurrence possibility down to the lowest possible number (even though it's not zero) means less possibility of future financial disaster.
6. I have no genetic markers but I do have a sister with cancer. It came to her at a young age and was aggressive and already in her nodes, not just DCIS. She's still here, 20+ years later, but she did the whole deal: lumpectomy, chemo, Tamox, and eventually hysterectomy. Maybe rads too, I don't remember. Cancer is scattered all over my family tree. If I can nail this thing to the wall now, I'm gonna go for it.
I ended up thinking of this in my personal situation as my one chance to "swing for the fences". A more realistic phrase would be, "bailing for the doorway, hollering in fear!" but that doesn't sound as good as swinging for the fences, right?. Only with a diagnosis of DCIS did I get the choice of doing one big surgical thing and possibly walk away without any further treatments such as rads, tamox, chemo, etc.
Or the way my husband and I ended up putting it: I just literally bet my boobs that there was nothing else in there but DCIS. If pathology shows something else, I won't be any worse off, and if it turns out to be only DCIS throughout, I may be able to just walk away.
That's what made sense for me, in my own situation only. Hope some of this may help someone as they think it through.
jinmo
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jinmo: thanks for sharing your story. I know it will help someone struggling with this decision. Hoping you find out it was just DCIS, but like you said, if it's IDC, so what, you've already gotten rid of it! If you can avoid treatment, that's a major plus as far as I'm concerned! I read somewhere that a lot of women don't stick with the hormonal therapy for five years bc of side effects (not that everyone gets them of course) but five years is a long time to alter your hormonal makeup. I bet your family has some kind of genetic marker they haven't discovered yet. The fact your sister has already had BC tells me that there's a lot more out there that needs to be discovered.
I watched the Tig Notaro special on Netflix yesterday. I guess you would call it a documentary. For those choosing to go "flat & fabulous" she is an inspiration! I highly recommend it. She brings humor to this crazy world of BC & I thoroughly enjoyed it! It's funny, one of my dear friends who's as flat-chested as can be said, "I'd never do reconstruction, no one would know the difference!" LOL
A-Boob: I have a fenced in yard - so no walking the dogs! I do keep a pillow on my chest at all times when I'm sitting or laying down in case my fur-babies decide to jump on "the mommy!"
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You guys are all so inspiring with your positive attitudes and support!! I'm lucky to have found this group.
I'm due for left breast mastectomy on the 30th, as I mentioned in a previous post. I decided to do only the left breast cuz the right has been healthy and I'll be augmenting that one to match the left eventually. :-)
My girlfriends are throwing me a party this Friday at our favorite watering hole to say bye bye to the boob and hope for good outcomes of the surgery.
I've also started the work FMLA/medical leave paperwork too. I'm really curious for those who have had a unilateral mastectomy with sentinel node biopsy and with tissue expander as to what your leave time was off from work. I have a huge presentation that I am leading a WEEK AFTER my surgery. It is for a major competition in my company and I cannot let down my teammates. So I am very worried as to whether I will be able to go in for that. It's a 15 minute presentation and I know I will have to ask my husband to drive me and I'll need to wear clothes that can hide my drains. I do have a contingency plan in place however, in case I just cannot physically do it. But I am hopeful and positive until I have to make a decision.
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Quick update: saw oncologist, going ahead with brachytherapy in the beginning of February. He drew blood to test a bunch of things including Vit D so I'll be curious on that. Lastly and what made me sad, he is ordering mamma print and should be about 3 weeks of more waiting! By that time I should be doing my radiation so I'll come off of that to the news if chemo is coming my way or not.
I'll read posts and check back after the hubby and I get back from dinner
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AnnoyingBoob - Netflix and chill!?? Really!? Good for you - lol!
http://fusion.net/story/190020/netflix-and-chill/
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dsmom - hahaha -i should clarify - 'netflix and chill, the postop edition', which for me is a heated blanket, snuggly dog, ugg slippers, netflix/laptop/phone all in close reach, ice cream, cheese, and any and all milk products. the only action these udders are getting is from my ps, lol!!!!
http://www.nejm.org/image-challenge?ci=20170119&st...
- here is an interesting photo for all to be aware of post xrt. angiosarcoma is a super rare complication, and this photo shows what it looks like. i don't post it to freak anyone out. knowledge is power!!
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pugsmama, I feel a flatlined day coming this weekend. Working this week with all this other stuff on my mind has exhausted me. Not to mention, I got my period today early!!! The oncologist said probably from stress. I'm so tired of all my lady parts right about a now!!
Another good luck and best wishes for DCISinAZ...let's hope you get to go all the way to the cabanas and not get turned around before boarding the boat this time. Will have you in my thoughts!
Cowboy, sorry about your rough time...hopefully you are home resting comfortably.
Why is it I get into a funk every time I go to the doctor? I figured all of these treatments were going to be in my plan but then I get all this info and my head spins and I'm pretty sure the shit fairy will be visiting tonight. I did get a new prescription for lorazepam so that was a plus.
Pyrrh, did you schedule your brachytherapy yet? I called to schedule mine today bit had to leave a message.
Hope everyone is doing well and We may need to watch annoyingboob and do a tillamook intervention. 😁 It's just so good!!
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Thanks everyone for your positive thoughts and encouragement. I am definitely feeling emotionally spent at this point. Between the fact that my diagnosis was back before Thanksgiving, the canceled surgery, and my dog dying, I am just drained. I certainly hope i will get some good news from my path report. I know I probably sound like a whiny baby considering a lot of you are already looking at a longer road of treatment than it sounds like I may be having (if all is DCIS as they think), so please accept my sincere apologies for that. But this board is one of the few places I can just be honest with my fears, and I know that you guys get it.
A friend said I was being so strong. Strong is when you do something that you have a choice over; that isn't this. I feel like we all got on a roller coaster ride that we can't get off of.
Those of you who haven't told anyone about your diagnosis. Wow. THAT is strong. I can't imagine going through this without the support of all my friends. They have been incredible. Even my veterinarian is planning to call me to see how I am doing (long story there but my vet is AMAZING!!). So, obviously do what you feel like you need to do to keep yourself and your sanity, but I would encourage you not to go this journey alone, or even just with us online friends. Like my daughter once said "sometimes you need Jesus with skin on".
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before I logged out I caught your note DCISInAZ....never never never would anyone think you are being whiny!!! Well, not in this group anyways. I'm pretty sure I have a whiny paragraph in every few posts of mine. It's so much to take in and it never leaves our minds so yeah, we just can't be positive Polly all the time. You have been through so much over the past couple of months and I thank you for sharing because that's what makes this a safe place for the rest of us to share our not so great moments. We get to share it all because good and bad are a part of this journey. There I scolded you! We all want to be here for you. ❤️️ I'll throw as much love and light up the 101. In your direction tomorrow
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Yep, Fightingirl, I will start Monday the 30th. Super happy with my doctors plan, she said they learned that patients do better and are happier if they don't need the device in over the weekend (well, duh); so we implant Monday morning then start treatment immediately, and they will take it out that Friday after the last treatment. I could have done it this coming Monday but I have houseguests leaving Monday afternoon and didn't want to mess up the visit.
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DCISinAZ- I'm sending positive thoughts and prayers your way! You are strong and you got this girl! We will all be waiting to hear from you. I'll pray for positive path reports.
Fightingirl - it seems like cancer is all about hurry up and wait. Will we all ever be able to kick the shit fairy out of our lives for good? I'm sending you positive vibes for a good nights sleep.
Vicwitch - Having to work a week after surgery may be a bit ambitious. However everyone is different. I am 2 weeks today post op and have not left my house except to see doctors. I did have a double mx with reconstruction so my healing may be more intense then yours. Either way I wish you luck. I put in for 6 weeks of FMLA, returning intermittently for 2 more weeks. My doctor left how much time off I wanted completely up to me. I just opted for what the average time off needed was. I am kinda of working, checking email and replying when I can. I work where I can go in for an hour or two and get done what I can. The hardest part of being off work for me is our office is moving on Monday and I have not been able to help and I am the office manager! Cancer does not have good timing 😬
Just so you all know all Tillamook products are a staple in this house! Ice cream (chocolate peanut butter is my fav)milk, butter, sour cream, yogurt and of coarse Cheese!!! If you have never tried it, you are missing out on the best cheese in the world 🧀 Costco carries Tillamook cheese!
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for large breasted women interested in skin sparing prophylactic mastectomy, here is an article you might find useful:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC51042...
nipple sparing mx is an option, but it will be multistaged. first, get the nipple up high and make sure its vasculature is preserved. then a few months later, go back for the mx and implant. from what I've read, it can be difficult to save the nipple with mx in large breasted women, which is why they do this multistaged approach. also note, this article is for prophylactics. clearly if you have an aggressive cancer you can't be waiting months on end for your mx ...
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DCISinAZ, thinking of you this morning! Prayers for an uneventful day, clean reports and restful recovery. As far as whining. ...it's ok and we will always listen and not even think of it as whining. It's just expressing yourself and we understand. Check in when you can ♡
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Looks like DCISinAZ is our sole friend in surgery today; then a break (phew, thank goodness) for almost a week! DCISinAZ we'll be waiting for you when you are ready for us!
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Second day post-op and I feel more like a truck hit me today! I think that the tape holding my drains in place is bothering me more than anything - it's making my skin raw. I got to see my incision today, and it's actually really nice - my underarm is a little more raw, but it's more skin irritation than anything else. The strangest sensation is the numbness - I know that some of it is here to stay. I don't get to take a shower until the drains come out, which is next Wednesday at the earliest. Trying to use my arm as much as possible and not let my shoulders tighten up. Hope everyone else is holding up well!
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Good luck to DCISinAZ today - will be waiting to hear how it goes, prayers and good vibes sent that way.
Did-no-see - I can imagine you are feeling it more now. While I only had a lumpectomy I get you about the underarm, mine still freaks me out a bit and I had my first surgery 12/6! My arm was pretty good until more recently, really having issues with straightening it now so trying to do lots of exercises, I don't want to lose any movement in it. Keep moving ahead but take your time and rest...don't over do, its not worth it! Prayers and good vibes sent your way!
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